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May 18, 2010


The Pillow Blockade



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Where's the bed?

You know what I hate? When we have our pillows all sorted out and rather than just leave them where they are the 'housekeeper' piles them up as in the picture and we have to start all over the next night.

OK, need caffeine.

A Gal reaction: How inviting! But, it would have been nicer if the topsheet were folded back.

A Guy reaction: WTF is this?

Where's the mint?

I see this guy

Did you check out the "Pillow Menu", Dave? That's my favorite part of the stay!

WTFBBQ?! I thought Punkin was just being funny but apparently not.

Well, I was being funny, Jeff, but yes, there are such things as the Pillow Menu. It's so much fun to call the front desk and say "I'll have two Goose Down and one Memory Foam, please."

Guys just don't know what they're missing!

I'd want to see the report from the Feng Shui expert on call.

I'd be too scared to sleep with all those pillows in case I dream about eating giant marshmallows.

Can you order this from the pillow menu?

This is why there are no male housekeeping staff...

Pannus, more relevant: can you order this?

My wife has fallen into the "we must cover the bed with pillows" trap.

She got mad at me once for just climbing under the blanket and leaving them all there. Apparently they are strictly decoration and not to be used as either pillows or additional blanket-weight.

Now I must spend a couple of minutes removing the pillows from the bed before I can climb in and go to sleep.

At least at the hotel I can do whatever I want with them: toss them, climb under them, lay on top of them, build a fort, see how many it takes to soak up all the water in the tub....

Maybe they thought you were expecting company? Or perhaps it was to distract you from writing about bedbugs again.

When I see pillows stacked like that it means one thing - pillow fight!

Punkin and I shared a bed and got extra fluffy pillows.

I have tons of pillows on my bed, what's wrong with that??

But Siouxie, guys think moving pillows is sooooo much work. Poor babies.

Let's say, for argument's sake, that each sleeper needs two pillows for their sleeping comfort. For the average two-person bed, that calls for a grand total of ...... hang on a moment, please ..... four pillows.

That hotel bed shows ten pillows. Therefore, they must expect you to be bringing in three more people for the night.

Punkin, can you order this?

It's easy, all you do is take a corner of the coverlet and give it a good flick. Pillows fly off in all directions and leave the bed free of them. Of course one needs to be sure one's medical insurance is paid up beforehand.

That hotel bed shows ten pillows. Therefore, they must expect you to be bringing in three more people for the night.

Posted by: Meanie the Blue | May 18, 2010 at 09:41 AM

NTTAWWT, eh Meanie?

Meanie, NTTAWWT of course. ( I only count 9)

*SMACKS* Annie with a BM'd pillow!

Sorry, you're right, Siouxie. I thought without bothering to closely check that the phalanxes on the left and on the right were identical. My bad.

Let's revise it, then, to two-and-a-half more people.

That's just it, Meanie. Guys don't pay attention to detail. It's just a buncha pillows to you butt...to us wimmen, it's a disproportionate, un-fenshway fungi fenway balanced bed.

Pillow fight with Siouxie's pillow!

Back atcha, Annie!!!

*snork* @ Dad O Lot (see how many it takes to soak up all the water in the tub!)

Um, the details that matter (availability of hotel room fridge, say) receive our attention, Siouxie. Pillow quotas are rather low on our list.

*yawn...tires of pillow talk *

Nice, Siouxie. Did you find that one in the closet?

When i saw this, I thought someone was setting up a perimeter...

I kind of like this one.

Pillows are nice for extra support for back, legs ect..

Do you get a mint for each pillow?

OT (sorta)

Dave was interviewed on the Paul and Young Ron (radio) Show this morning and mentioned his appearance on Craig's show being taped, to be shown at a later date (which I'm sure is posted ever-so-clearly on the "events" page, thanks to our most wonderful and efficient s.b.). He also joked about 24 and his book (yes, he wrote a book!). They asked him to write a "sitcom type" show for them in the future and he agreed! They are currently doing a who-done-it murder show written by suspense writer, Brad Meltzer.

/OT (sorta)

You guys all stay at purty fancy hotels -- if the hotels I stay at had that many pillows I'd call an exterminator.

She only needs one pillow.

bonmot definitely knows where to make reservations!

Eliot Spitzer's B&B.

This photo was taken just before Mandy Pepperidge and the girls began to have fun, while Bluto was on a ladder.

"Snork!" @ Teresa's "etc."

Siouxie - way cool about Dave's sitcom. Hopefully a spoof on '24.'

Mot, if you flick the covers back and let pillows fly in all directions, you'd better make sure your life insurance is paid up also. Men will go to the gym to lift weights but they can't pick a few pillows up and put them where they belong at night. I have a special basket for mine. Evidently Dave has already messed with those pillows. They're not straight.

"How many pillows are on your bed?" is mancode for determing your degree of p-whippedness.

So is "Do you have any baskets in your house?"

Sheesh. I'm not allowed to gripe about removing pillows from the bed when I'm ready to sleep, but it's apparently ok for my wife to go on and on about having to move my chop saw and various pieces of lumber from the dining room table every time she wants to eat a meal, especially when I'm not the one who wanted the new cabinets to begin with.

And I won't even begin to compare the difference in the amount of work required to remove fifteen pillows from a bed compared to the amount of work to lower a certain hinged ring device from a vertical position to a horizontal one.

*ducks and covers*

Maybe Dave has already given us some insight into the apparent male-female divergence regarding the importance of pillow inventory and strategic deployment. It could be related to the same prehistoric gender-role factors that influence, as described in IMWID, the toilet seat up/down controversy. Guys may be wired to maintain defense-readiness by minimizing barriers to immediate threat response, such as surplus pillowage.

In other words...y'all are lazy??


Exactly Siouxie. *SMACKS* Slightly Askew for Mrs. Slightly Askew.

I don't know what all the fuss is about. This room is perfectly set up for couples.

First, the big giant pillow is there as a visual cue to announce that one is looking at a bed. Women do not use this. They place it on that chair which guys typically reserve to sit down. Second, the three white pillows are there to allow her to have better TV viewing. They may ultimately be used as her leg comforting pillows, if the guy erred by complaining about any of this. Lastly, the two small golden pillows are arranged to act as a border which defines her space from his.

The guy will use the big pillow and a single white one to view TV and throw all the other ones on the floor. When he is ready to sleep, the big one gets tossed too.

The extra pillows are for smacking guys who whine about having so many pillows.

^5 Annie!

The more pillows, the more places for spiders to hide. Just sayin'.....

Good point, mtb. Especially Katipos.

This photo was taken just before Mandy Pepperidge and the girls began to have fun, while Bluto was on a ladder.

Posted by: OC Dolphin | May 18, 2010 at 12:45 PM

Best. Pillow Fight. EVER.

I think they're trying to spell something out.

Did you check the closet?

Ok...is it ME or does anyone (and by anyone I mean a woman of the female gender) want to straighten out those pillows???

It's you....ok, I lied. I wanna straighten them out. Especially the urban-cowboy one you sent me. NTTAWWT.

This is a "speed-trap" for men. If we leave'em on the bed we're lazy (even though that's where pillows belong). If we use the "wrong" pillow to sleep with we're a fool for not understanding the decorative purpose of such. If we toss them aside we're neaderthals because they are not floor pillows. And if we use the "pillow basket" it means our genitalia are stored in a mason jar at an undisclosed location, because you no longer have a use for them anyhow.

Additionally, we had this discussion one time where I was pillow-ignorant. The next time I went to bed ahead of her I went to sleep and she came in to a four-foot stack of decorative, and other, pillows on her side.
I explained it this way: I need one pillow, you have six pillows. End of discussion.

That pillow arrangement looks like a Cow.

M'shark, you just used "espadrille" on another thread. Obviously someone has already quilted you a tea cozy for your boys.

the worst hotel pillow error ever

... but it's apparently ok for my wife to go on and on about having to move my chop saw and various pieces of lumber from the dining room table every time she wants to eat a meal, especially when I'm not the one who wanted the new cabinets to begin with.

A very good point.

But, despite the prevailing 'wisdom', we're not lazy, just afraid to do the wrong thing. You can't pile the unused pillows on the floor. You can't throw them in the tub. Even if there's a designated spot for them, there's always rules about order, orientation, etc. We're going to get it wrong anyway.

The last time I experienced the Hotel Pillow Glut, the danged things were wearing little green belts complete with metal buckles ! I mean, seriously, what the ???

A pillow basket? Seriously?

I'm with Sharkie on that one, cindy.

You could probably stop this by calling the desk and specifying "donut pillows" for your next night.

Annie, there's a huge difference between "knowing" and "wearing".

My wife works for a hotel now? Why am i always the last one to find out about these things?

Pillows are very useful for silencing handguns; was the hotel expecting Jack Bauer, or does it do this for everyone from Miami?

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