ATTENTION, LADIES:
Scientists have invented what women want in a man - the sensitivity spray. They say it is capable of turning the most macho of hunks into a dewy-eyed baby-kisser who says all the right things and stops going down the pub.
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Scientists have invented what women want in a man - the sensitivity spray. They say it is capable of turning the most macho of hunks into a dewy-eyed baby-kisser who says all the right things and stops going down the pub.
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A spray that turns men into women? It makes me want to cry.
Posted by: fivver | April 29, 2010 at 12:30 PM
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHHHH!!
Did ya HAVE to??? I just ate too.
*SMACKS* fivver!!!
Posted by: Siouxie | April 29, 2010 at 12:34 PM
One ponders how effective it would be on the Blogetts?
Posted by: DaninIA | April 29, 2010 at 12:39 PM
One wonders if there is a spray to make women quiet, naked and compliant.
Posted by: Hammond Rye | April 29, 2010 at 12:47 PM
Hammie,
I hear Bourbon does a good job of that. In large enough quantities.
Posted by: wiredog | April 29, 2010 at 12:48 PM
Of course not Hammie, cause now that we have you talking about your feelings, we're goint to ask all kinds of questions....
Posted by: Dorakay | April 29, 2010 at 12:50 PM
sneaky!
Posted by: queensbee | April 29, 2010 at 01:00 PM
Ironically they start screaming in the same manner as when you use peper-spray.
Posted by: MartiniShark | April 29, 2010 at 01:03 PM
Ya think Mr. Before might be compensating for anything at all?
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | April 29, 2010 at 01:07 PM
Hold my chablis and watch this!
Posted by: fivver | April 29, 2010 at 01:10 PM
Hammie?? jewelry works.
Posted by: Siouxie | April 29, 2010 at 01:20 PM
"...stops going down the pub."
Er, should that be "down on the pub", or maybe "down to the pub"?
Posted by: Emmett Flatus | April 29, 2010 at 01:21 PM
Hey, doll, I'm home!
How's about bringing me a cold one while I catch the Monster Truck Demolish-a-Looza highlights? Have you got the remo---Spritz!---test idea how much I love you? What has your day been like, sweetheart? I can tell you need a massage. Here, take your shoes off and lie down with this blanket next to me. There, is that better? Should I light some candles? Tell me what you're thinking, babe....
*Sound of spray bottle smashing against back of fireplace*
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | April 29, 2010 at 01:30 PM
A gift for you, Siouxie.
Posted by: Hammond Rye | April 29, 2010 at 01:31 PM
LOL Meanie. We have NO problem with men being sensitive. Not BM-lowed.
Posted by: Siouxie | April 29, 2010 at 01:38 PM
Probably not a good idea. And what guy is going to let someone stick something up his nose?
Posted by: Elon | April 29, 2010 at 01:41 PM
"Remove your own damn spider! The spider is just FINE!!"
Posted by: Allen at Division | April 29, 2010 at 01:42 PM
...of course, this is based on a "scientist" named "Hurley-man".
Posted by: Allen at Division | April 29, 2010 at 01:43 PM
We need to figure out how to load this into something we can drop on our enemy in battle (before they do it to us).
Posted by: Suzie Q. Wacvet | April 29, 2010 at 01:47 PM
Nice start, Hammie.
Posted by: Siouxie | April 29, 2010 at 01:47 PM
Does this spray make my butt look big?
* ducks out to go shoe shopping *
Posted by: Ford79 | April 29, 2010 at 02:14 PM
Apparently it works for these guys...
Posted by: Steve Haller | April 29, 2010 at 02:19 PM
Probably not a good idea. And what guy is going to let someone stick something up his nose?
Posted by: Elon | April 29, 2010 at 01:41 PM
As I have said before. Guys will do anything when promised a "Surprise"
Posted by: DaninIA | April 29, 2010 at 02:33 PM
I hope that Dave posts about 20 more things today so that this picture goes away. And to think I was going to download his book on my new e-reader.
Posted by: nursecindy | April 29, 2010 at 02:47 PM
"...stops going down the pub."
Er, should that be "down on the pub", or maybe "down to the pub"?
Posted by: Emmett Flatus | April 29, 2010 at 01:21 PM
It's a British paper; they talk funny. See here.
Posted by: Richard the Weasel-Hearted | April 29, 2010 at 02:55 PM
...It is released into the blood during labour - triggering the production of breast milk ...
This would probably put an end to my being sensitive (or make me cry)
I would be willing to bet that the pentagon is already working up a weaponized version for the battlefield.
Posted by: Dad-O-Lot | April 29, 2010 at 03:07 PM
And sadly, they both have mullets.
Posted by: Suzy Q | April 29, 2010 at 03:14 PM
How'sabout I stick something up my nose that makes me more of an a55hole?
Posted by: CJrun | April 29, 2010 at 04:58 PM
as long as there's an antidote.
Posted by: Cheesewiz | April 29, 2010 at 05:18 PM
Hey, I'm as sensitive as the next guy. I am the cook in the house and I clean the kitchen every night.
But I can't understand my wife when she asks me how I feel about X, maybe two different paint samples for the living room that look exactly alike no matter how much light I shine on them. I can't see why I should "feel" anything about a stupid paint sample when she KNOWS that the day after we paint the wall I won't see it for the rest of my life.
She plays a game and asks me what color the drapes are next to my bed, the ones that have been there for ten years? Are they tan or red?
"We have drapes?" is my response and I think that of most other men.
So, don't ask me about sensitivity.
Posted by: Steve | April 29, 2010 at 07:25 PM
It's time to buy stock in companies making these.
Posted by: Ralph | April 29, 2010 at 08:50 PM
Umm.... will their man-boobs grow too?
Posted by: Tash | April 29, 2010 at 09:58 PM
If he'd had that in his pocket Mae West would have been really glad to see him.
Posted by: Clankie | April 29, 2010 at 10:20 PM
*squirts* Steve with some sensitivity spray. Ralph, that gas mask can be removed. The best answer to give your wife when she asks you about paint colors, drapes, etc. is: "Honey, your taste is so much better than mine I'd rather you make that decision because I know whatever you choose will be wonderful and I will love it." Then tell her you want to make sure you put the toilet seat down and leave.
Posted by: nursecindy | April 29, 2010 at 10:20 PM
"In spray form, it seems the chemical can make a man 'feel' like a woman."
You make me feel...you make me feel....you make me feel like a womaaaaan......
Posted by: chuck | April 29, 2010 at 11:26 PM
Chuck - yup, the song needed to be sung. Maybe He Who Must Not Be Named will sing it for us!
Posted by: Tash | April 29, 2010 at 11:32 PM
Just when I was beginning to lament my bachelor status...you go and post this.
Screw it; I'm never getting married.
Posted by: Wes S. | April 30, 2010 at 12:44 AM
Proof that there is a Satan in the world.
Posted by: Loudmouth | April 30, 2010 at 07:20 AM
My hed iz pastid on yay!?
Whose shady face is 'shopped onto Mr Over-Compensating's pudgy frame? It seems vaguely familiar.
Posted by: danceswithvowels | April 30, 2010 at 08:56 AM
Didn't miss piggy have some of that in Muppets From Space?
Posted by: Abbie Normal | April 30, 2010 at 02:05 PM