24

Here is where we stand:

Jack, devastated about Renee getting sniped out of the plot, is trying to work through his feelings of grief and loss by whacking the Russians who whacked her. But President Woman President ordered Jack to be locked down because she needs the Russians for the all-important Peace Procezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

Sorry!  Anyway, as you would imagine, Jack did not respond well to being locked down. He stole a convenient helicopter and is now on his way toward the UN, thereby forcing Chloe, who is in charge of CTU, to order the Air Force to force him down. We frankly feel sorry for the Air Force.

Edgar is still dead.

Stay tuned in the comments section after the show as the Amazing Steve attempts to unravel the plot, which is no mean feat, as can be seen in this photograph of Steve holding the actual plot.

Meanwhile, here's a scientific poll:

Is it necessary to refrigerate ketchup?
	No.
	Absolutely not.
	You notice they don't refrigerate ketchup in restaurants. It sits out on the tables for DAYS.
	That way, you're not wrecking your nice hot hamburger by pouring this cold glop onto it.
	Our guess is, the concept of refrigerating ketchup was invented by lawyers.
	The same is true of mustard.
	Mayonnaise is a different story.
	Montpelier.
pollcode.com free polls

UPDATE: Also, Mr. Bauer, you must return your seat to the upright and locked po sition.

UPDATE: Wait, that was the WHOLE HELICOPTER SEQUENCE? Lame-O-Rama.

UPDATE: Ethan sure recovered quickly from a serious heart attack.

UPDATE: Physical coercion! No!

UPDATE: "Pull out now." Heheheh.

UPDATE: Who is the Vegas-looking guy? We know him from before, right?

UPDATE: "An assortment of assault rifles." Yes, that's definitely how the "pros" order assault rifles.

UPDATE: "We do this right, we take Jack by surprise." Right!

UPDATE: I hate the Peace Agreement. I miss the Lethal Atomic Rods o' Doom.

UPDATE: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

UPDATE: CTU: We're even less competent than you thought.

UPDATE: That Freddie Prinze Jr. sure can emote.

UPDATE: These men have some jowls.

UPDATE: It's a jowl-off.

UPDATE: OK,so at the beginning of this episode, Jack was trying to locate Dana Walsh, and at the end, Jack was still trying to locate Dana Walsh. In other words: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz.

UPDATE: Next week: Waterboarding! Dana gets loose! Take, it, The Amazing Steve.

Comments

[Claire]

Shoot him in the face, Ethan!

[danceswithvowels]

Jack's put a lotta trust in Jr. Good bet.

[nursecindy]

Putting his health first??? He just had a heart attack, heart surgery, and then came back to work.

[Wes S.]

Help us, Ethan-Wan; you're our only hope. Please shoot the Handbag. Please.

[Jeff Meyerson]

"Yeah, I'm back."

I'm all but President again.

Too bad Martha didn't finish him off when she stabbed him last time.

[Cheesewiz]

Pop him Ethan.

[homeybeef]

Let's see Logan get stabbed...again

[danceswithvowels]

Every treaty is written in blood.

This one is written on a large scab.

[Bnatral]

Oooh, Ethan's going all Jack Bauer on Logan!

[Jeff Meyerson]

"That's right - she wasn't. But I finally got her down in the gutter with me."

[trustf8]

^snork* @ dave's jowl off

[nursecindy]

Not a good look for Dana.

[tropichunt.com guy™]

Waterboarding!

[danceswithvowels]

Makeover Time!

[ASLSigner]

Cole: "What if you're wrong?" Jack: "You obviously haven't seen the last 7 seasons!! I'm never wrong!"

[ArcticAl]

I wonder if Ethan is going to help Jack with his mission and grab an assault rifle.

[Claire]

The question is, will Darth Logan's lips move when PWP starts to speak?

[Jeff Meyerson]

zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

[Senex]

Fire the shower up. You have 4 minutes to save this episode.

[Cheesewiz]

Dana's got that Benji the hunted look.

[Wes S.]

Welcome to Vito's Bail Bonds and Private Interrogation Service...

[KJP]

Looks like they exhausted all non-coercive interrogation options inside of fifteen seconds.

[homeybeef]

the rods?

[LeDud]

Extreme makeover dancewithvowels !

[trustf8]

Can someone PLEEEZ take her out like Pres Palmer??

[Jeff Meyerson]

She actually said "the fortitude to pursue a better tomorrow."

Torture her after you get done with Dana.

[danceswithvowels]

The President: "Wacka wacka wacka ungow! Spppphhhhhht! Thank me! Thank me!"

[ArcticAl]

water boarding! but not as effective as a shot in the thigh. Jack knows how to really torture, these guys are rank amateurs.

[nursecindy]

Are they giving Dana a shampoo or waterboarding her?

[Siouxie]

WATERBOARDING!! WOOOOOOHOOO!! FINALLY!! some torture!!

sorry..LTTG!

[tropichunt.com guy™]

The bastards! They're pouring old soup from the Soup Nazi's place on her! And she doesn't like that flavor!

[Loudmouth]

Come on When they torture Jack they always take off his shirt. Can they do any less for Dana? Or for us? THEY OWE US.

[homeybeef]

wow. That sucked.

[KJP]

...aaaaand someone shoots Mrs. Hassan.

No?

Oh well.

[nursecindy]

Siouxie, you're late!

[K-Doc]

"An all new 24"? So they're going to suddenly stop recycling old plots?

[Jeff Meyerson]

OMG - just horrible.

She makes W. look decisive.

[Bnatral]

I bet the peace process will be falling apart shortly...

[Meanie the Blue]

Get ..... THE LADLE!

[Wes S.]

Actually, nursecindy, judging from what we've seen of Dana's hair this season it might be worse torture to shampoo her than waterboard her...

[funnyman]

How nice of them to give Dana Walsh a spa bath..

when will Jack's turn come?...

I wish I were asleep as this episode then would be Good for something....

[danceswithvowels]

Getting Dana to talk? There's an app for that! (Requires iPhone 4. Not yet available. Extra charges apply. Your millstone may vary.)

[LeDud]

That torture scene reminded me of Monty Python's "THE COMFY CHAIR" from the Spanish Inquisition.

[Kate]

Well, this week was terrible.

Helicopters?-disappointing.
CTU trap?- eh.
rest?- yawn.

And assault rifles were so promising.

[Loudmouth]

The Russians are real experts. At least they used a car battery charger.

[Kate]

Thrill ride? Are we watching the same show?

[Meanie the Blue]

Exactly, LeDud. "Fetch .... THE CUSHIONS!!"

[Jeff Meyerson]

Dana's loose?

[danceswithvowels]

Cardinal Biggles, bring me ...

The Soft Loofah!

[Loudmouth]

Model cop time.

[trustf8]

My Mets are rained out tonight, & 24 suuuucked...
When it rains it pours.

:(

[nursecindy]

Good luck making this look exciting Amazing Steve.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Tie her to the comfy chair!

[Wes S.]

OK, previous interrogations on "24" involved power tools, jumper cables and the odd thigh shot. We're supposed to get upset over a little water?

[danceswithvowels]

*Snork* @ all the SOUP references!

[homeybeef]

welp, go Hawks.

And Cubs, I guess.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Now to watch a real exciting espionage show - MI-5.

trustf8: check out channel 21.

[Senex]

Dana is loose and her blouse is dry. Worst written season ever.

[LeDud]

This is the way the series ends, this is the way the series ends....not with a bang, but a whimper.... (under ladled water)

[funnyman]

Based on how much Fox "pumped" and "hyped" tonight's episode, I think the prognosis for the next five hours is "extreme coma"....

[rockin01]

Ok, I get it- they're purposely making the last episodes progessively horrible so we don't miss the show so much when it's gone. Thank you, 24!

[danceswithvowels]

Dana's been loose for a while. She probably has even wiped with a French flag, but only in secret.

[funnyman]

I already miss it.

I miss President Allstate...

I miss Edgar...

I miss Chloe tasering people and miss her blond look...

I miss Aaron...

But most of all, I miss all the hours of life I missed out on, watching 24.....

[nursecindy]

The Comfy Chair. I love John Cleese.

[funnyman]

By the way, KEIFER NEWS

SUTHERLAND SAYS 24 MOVIE SCRIPT IS READY...

click
here

Key quote:" It doesn't have to be a bomb"

YOU MEAN LIKE THE FINAL SEASON?

[Wes S.]

I miss Nina.

Hell, I'm missing Kimmy's cougar at this point.

Sigh.

Oh well: I started watching this show when it first premiered, and I'll stick it out to the bitter end.

[Loudmouth]

Jack is going to have to do a lot of shooting and blasting to use up that arsenal. We can only hope.

[rockin01]

Well, Wes, take it from the Handbag- it's too late for buyer's guilt now...

[texxasredd]

Dana Walsh - the story arc continues.... Dana is going to turn out to be a multi-mole: She really was an American mole pretending to be a Russian mole pretending to be a terrorist mole pretending to be a Logan mole and was also double-deep undercover, double-secret, double-wide trailer trash, double-naught spy mole. Then she can be in the movie, too.

[funnyman]

When it rains, we snore (continued)...

FOX is recycling plots from other movies and older episodes of 24.

CBS is recycling old CSI Miami episodes, in fact showing the same episode that was on CSI MIAMI weekends this weekend!

And even Castle is a rerun!

I blame it all on ex-President Handbag!!! You're
evil, really evil!!!

[KC Brady]

Who sells Jack Bauer Brand shoulder bags?

[LeDud]

I like that idea of Dana being a multi level mole. Maybe she will end up being a neo-nazi with an arian/hick accent and Adolf Hitlers brain in her frig.

[funnyman]

what if...keifer DOESN't star in the movie but they replace him with ...
this!!!

[Steve (The 24 Guy)]

Still working on it! I'll be posting as soon as I can!

[Siouxie]

*SMACKS* funnyman!! THAT is NOT funny!!

Sorry I missed the blogtivities. I recorded it and will "pretend" to live-blog it when I watch it.

[kevin]

Not long before the Vice President takes over -- Mitchell Hayworth (the Vice President under Allison Taylor during Day 7).

[Wes S.]

Oh Gawd, THAT lame excuse for a vice-president?

Dick Cheney, please come back, all is forgiven...

[Steve (The 24 Guy)]

Previously on "24", we saw: Ex-President Logan is still a weasel (apologies to any weasels that may be reading this); Dana is Russian for "mole", since that's who she was working with all this time; Jack tried to give Dana a "desk slam makeover"; Most people watching the show fell asleep for 50 minutes, yet somehow didn't miss anything - fortunately they woke up just in time to see Jack take a CTU helicopter, because he's just plain sick of driving cars.

The following takes place between 10 am and 11 am:

10:00 am – Jack continues his flight over New York city, only narrowly missing getting mugged. A couple of more helicopters show up, and tell Jack they'd like to have Jack's helicopter back, so Jack lands it on the "Cooper" building. The helicopters continue to circle, providing narration to Jack's actions as he makes his way down the fire escape and to the ground. The Fake New York Police arrive just in time to lose Jack, who has already made his way into the crowd.

10:05 am – Chloe and Cole discuss Jack's great escape and the fact that he's going to try and prove that the Russians are in on the whole plot. Chloe asks Cole to go out into the field. Hopefully he'll understand that it's to help Jack, and that he doesn't just randomly walk into a nearby field. Arlo is tasked with using some of his personal spy satellites to try and help find Jack.

10:06 am – Mrs. President and Ethan are still at the U.N. He breaks the news they still haven't found Jack, but NYPD is working on a perimeter, which is probably just like a CTU perimeter, except with bagels.

Ethan points out that covering up the Russian's involvement with Hasan's death are ground for impeachment. She misunderstands and says that she doesn't think coffee grounds are good for peach schnapps. Ethan continues and tells her that she'll probably also get a criminal indictment, which really horrifies her because she'll have yet another thing in common with ex-President Logan. She thinks that CTU will find Jack, but since Jack won't be the person at CTU looking for Jack, there's no chance that will happen.

Ethan tells her that even if they find Jack, evidence will likely surface anyway, much like two hypothetical redneck bodies that were stashed away in a swamp. Hypothetically.

Mrs. President wants to make sure this peace deal goes through, but decides to make an announcement that the US is going to withdraw from the peace deal. They hold hands, which doesn't make anything better, but it does creep out the viewers.

She leaves in the elevator, only to be confronted by something more horrible when the doors open: Ex-President Logan.

She tells him the peace deal is off and that his plan to sell those "President Logan Helped Broker The Peace Deal And All I Got Was This Lousy T-Shirt" shirts are down the tubes. She tells him that she's going to have to call Mrs. Hasan and ask for her forgiveness. For what, it's a little unclear, since Mrs. President really didn't have anything to do with what happened, and only just found out about the Russian involvement. She might apologize for the weird plot shifts. We'll just have to see.

Logan stops her as she's doing this to tell her that he has an idea that might help the peace deal go through, despite everything that's going on. He thinks it would be a great idea to classify Dana as an enemy combatant and to stash her away in private facility, and he just happens to know of such a place. He's part of their internet affiliate program and if they use his associate id, he'll get a nice kickback for it.

She doesn't think they can keep her in a private prison indefinitely, because someone is going to find the receipts for that place and start asking questions. Logan assures her that people at the facility will be able to get her to talk, merely by putting her in the "Hello Kitty" suite of the prison. Mrs. President is completely against this type of torture, but Logan thinks it'll be OK because of the peace accord.

Commercial

10:17 am – Arlo's spy cams have picked up Jack at an intersection. They're uncertain it's actually him for a moment, since there are no bodies nearby. Chloe tells Arlo to redirect Cole to that area so they can find Jack.

Mrs. President calls Chloe to ask about Jack. She tells Chloe that she'd like to have Dana transferred to a "safe house", which is likely to be more safe than anywhere but CTU, since Jack is coming there to get Dana. She also tells Chloe that a "private security firm" will be there soon to get Dana. Chloe isn't sold on this idea. Mrs. President tells Chloe that Jack's connections to people in the government make Kevin Bacon look like a hermit, so she wants to be extra-double-positive-sure that Dana will be taken away before Jack can find someone to help him. Someone named "Mark Bledso" will be showing up at CTU soon. She hangs up on Chloe.

Mrs. President tells Logan she wants to be sure that Dana isn't tortured a lot. Maybe just a little. But not much. Logan tells her that he knows she doesn't want to see things turn ugly. She tells him that things are already ugly, and points right at his face.

10:19 am - Jack has taken this time to go phone shopping for several of the same phones. He walks out without the chargers, and without paying. He must have threatened the store clerk earlier.

Interestingly enough, these brand new phones are already charged up, so Jack makes a phone call. He calls Chloe and they discuss what Mrs. President is up to. Jack wants "access" to Dana, which is likely to involve more head-banging lessons like last hour. Chloe tell him that Mrs. President gave the order to keep Dana away from Jack, but Jack rejects this on the grounds there is something illegal going on, and that he wasn't the one doing it. Jack tells Chloe that she really doesn't want to go against him on this. She gets hysterical and goes into her best "Cornholio" impression saying, "Are you threatening me?"

Jack explains that he's only asking for help, and he wants to talk to Dana alone. She points out that he's being hunted down by every law enforcement agent in the city. She pauses for a second and then they both laugh about this, since they'd never be able stand up to Jack anyway.

She wants to know what Jack will do with the evidence, because if there's a book or movie deal, she wants part of the cut. He tells her he's only interested in exposing the people that were in on the plot. (That makes a lot of writer's in LA extremely nervous).

Chloe tells him about the private security firm coming to get Dana, but she hasn't had the time to look in the yellow pages to see who the likely firms might be. Jack asks her to find out, and that he'll call her back later. He hangs up and throws away the phone, leaving it to be picked up by someone else who will likely go to jail until they can explain they have no idea who Jack Bauer is.

Jack calls a man that seems to be an apprentice of Edward Lyle from "Enemy of the State". Jack tells him that he needs a comm unit, some MP5s (which are two better than MP3s), an assortment of assault rifles, some body armor, and full surveillance package.

10:22 am – The soon to be aptly named "Bledso" and his security guys arrive at CTU. Bledso calls Guy Who Looks Like Jacob From Lost, Only Younger. Bledso tells GWLLJFLOY that in his professional opinion, it would be a good idea to kill Dana. He's pretty sure that she'll go along with it, because it would mean that she couldn't be back on 24 anytime soon, not even in a movie. GWLLJFLOY isn't willing to do this, but is willing to think about it.

Chloe arrives and introduces herself to Bledso. She tells him that she going to need to see some kind of paperwork – a letter, a note card, a crayon drawing… anything – before she lets him take Dana. She wants it to be official.

Bledso punches up something on his phone and HANDS CHLOE THE PHONE. Handing Chloe a piece of electronic equipment is like handing over chocolate to Willy Wonka… amazing things could be done with it. Chloe (of course) has a USB stick in her pocket, and is able to download the memory of the phone into the stick and hand it back before Bledso realizes what she did. He's lucky it's still running the same mobile operating system as before.

They enter Dana's holding room. When Dana realizes that she's about to permanently leave the show, she pleads with Chloe to not let them take her, but they take her anyway.

10:24 am – After they're gone, Chloe plugs the USB stick into another phone and discovers where they're taking Dana. Instead of calling Jack, Chloe makes a mistake I never thought I'd see her make: She calls Cole and tells him that she thinks Jack doesn't know what he's talking about. Cole tells her that if Jack's right, (if…ha!) then they could be on the wrong side of everything. Chloe tells him that she's on the A side and Jack is definitely on side B. Besides, they're under Presidential Orders from Mrs. President. They have to bring Jack in. She hangs up.

She goes into the CTU room and tells everyone they're going to try and help Cole capture Jack.

Commercial

10:30 am – Jack arrives at the location of Jim, the man he called earlier, and starts to look over the equipment he requested. Jim tells Jack that every agency in the area is looking for Jack, and that Jack must have done something really bad. Jack tells him that they're not really after him for anything he's already done, it's what he's about to do, which could involve a lot of shooting and explosions, that they're worried about.

Jack calls Chloe, and she gives him the wrong address. It's the location where they're going to try and ambush Jack. Jack hangs up and throws this phone away in Jim's garbage can. Jim doesn't appear to have seen this happen, because with all the security equipment he has around him, he would have completely freaked out if he had. Jack tells Jim that he might be back for more equipment.

10:34 am – Cole explains to a bunch of his men that they're going to try and capture Jack. None of these guys runs away. This proves they don't know who Jack is, because if they did, they wouldn't be hanging around trying to capture him.

10:35 am – Ethan arrives to tell to Mrs. President that her speech is ready to go, and is dismayed to learn that Mrs. President has changed her mind. She tells him that she has a really good plan to keep Dana "off the grid". Ethan tells her that green energy policy is nothing they need to be talking about right now, since there's so much at stake with the peace accord.

She tells him that Dana is being taken to a secure facility where Jack won't be able to get her. She's also authorized a private security firm to "acquire the evidence", which is government talk for "torture". Ethan can't believe what he's hearing. She goes on to explain herself, finally using the phrase "for the greater good". Ethan realizes that Logan convinced her of all this, and tells her so. She looks at him and realizes that what she said is laughable too, but she's already made up her mind and there's no going back on that now. Ethan tells her that he's going to resign because he really wants off the show. He tells her that she'll be in good hands with President Logan. She tells him the other president used that slogan, not Logan. Then she says, "Hey! That rhymes! Slogan, Logan! Slogan, Logan! Sloganlogan! Sloganlogan!" She stops when she realizes Ethan has left the room.

Commercial

10:41 – Dahlia is very busy with paperwork already, even though she's not been officially appointed to anything yet. She's worried what people will think of her for being on the show this season. Kahlia enters the room and tells her that it'll be best to confront this directly and openly admit to being part of this season of "24".

10:43 – Jack arrives at the ambush site and calls Chloe. He rearranges some very lightweight and clean garbage bags while he talks to her. She tells him the likely location of where they would be holding Dana, if Dana were actually there, and this wasn't really an ambush.

Jack goes on the run, and helps push a semi-tracker trailer down the street by putting his hand on it and running. Having pushed the semi out of the way, he continues on his way.

Chloe warns Cole, who warns his men.

Jack takes out his assault rifle and some ammo and hides by a truck. Using a dental mirror that he "borrowed" from the last dentist who made the mistake of scraping Jack's gums too aggressively, he watches one of Cole's men. Jack knocks on the truck, which is the universal "hey, come check out the noise" signal for guards, so of course the guard goes to investigate. One punch later, the guard is down. Jack tells Chloe he's going in. Jack then grabs the guy he just punched and carries him into the building.

Cole and his men get ready for Jack. What they're not ready for is a laundry bag with their friend on top of it hanging from the ceiling. After a minor scuffle, Jack convinces everyone to put their guns down (including Cole), by just yelling really loudly.

It turns out that Jack knew Chloe was lying all along, since she seemed a lot less enthusiastic about Jack kicking people's butts than usual. He tells Cole to make a call to Chloe to let her know that the plan worked, which he does.

Cole wants to know what Jack is going to do next, but that just gets Jack to yell some more, so Cole does what he says and "locks down" his men. Cole tells him that he's not sure he has enough Lox to cover all of them, but he'll do the best he can.

Commercial

10:52 am – Cole has all his men locked down, including the guy that was on top of that hanging laundry bag. Sure looks like that guy landed face first. Anyway, Jack tells Cole to follow him. Jack tells Cole that he needs help to find Dana. Cole isn't very convinced that Mrs. President could be covering anything up, but Jack is very insistent. He also points out that Cole has done a lot of work with Dana, and since she was directly responsible for letting the terrorists get their hands on nuclear material, not to mention pre-release copies of Avatar, he's responsible too. Cole is relieved Jack doesn't know about the Redneck Dunk Festival that he and Dana attended the night before. Cole decides to go along with it.

Jack tells Cole they have to pretend he's taking Cole hostage so everyone will think that Cole wasn't involved. Cole tells him they used to play games like this when he was a kid, so it'll be fun. They convince Cole's men of this because Jack starts yelling loudly, which should be convincing enough for anyone.

10:55 am – President Logan watches a fake news report about Dhalia when Ethan enters the room. Logan tells him he's heard about the resignation, that he's happy that Ethan is thinking of his health first, and that he'd like a letter of recommendation to be Mrs. President's new adviser. Ethan tells Logan that he knows exactly what's going on, and he tells Logan to stop the coverup. Logan doesn't look like he's believing it.

Ethan tells Logan that Mrs. President is pretty far out in to the woods on this, without a canteen, GPS, or even camping equipment. Ethan warns Logan that if Mrs. President has a problem because of this, he'll come after Logan personally.

10:57 am – Dana arrives at her secure location with a black napkin over her head. The guys with her have tried to explain how to use it correctly, but she seems very mixed up and nervous. Bledso tells her that she needs to let them know about the evidence she was going to give to Jack, and the sooner she does this, the sooner she'll be done with her plot line.

10:58 am – Mrs. President arrives at the press conference, and Dahlia thanks her. Mrs. President takes the podium and makes her speech which is your basic political speech with a lot of clichés.

While this is going on, Bledso and his men start surfboarding Dana, until they realize they're doing the wrong kind of torture.

11:00 am – Time's up!

NEXT TIME ON "24" – JACK KNEELS! JACK POINTS A GUN! DANA IS OUT ON THE STREET! WATER POURS! Oh, who am I kidding…it doesn't look at exciting.

SEE YOU NEXT TIME!

Now I'm going to have another piece of my birthday cake! :-)

[Siouxie]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY, AMAZING STEVE!!!!!!!!!

[Wes S.]

I'll second those birthday wishes. Have a piece for me, too. Chocolate, I hope...?

[Steve (The 24 Guy)]

Yes, chocolate, made by one of my kids. :-)

[nursecindy]

Happy, Happy Birthday Steve. (Mine is Weds) Good people are born this time of year in April aren't they? As usual a wonderful job. In fact, considering what you had to work with, an absolutely amazing job.

[Bill]

Steve - Amazing job as usual of making sense out of nothing!

[Meanie the Blue]

It's your birthday, and you were forced to watch that?? You are owed, big time, sir.

[Tina]

Wish the Amazing Steve a happy birthday!

[funnyman]

AMAZING STEVE,

"zhù nǐ shēng rì kuài lè
zhù nǐ shēng rì kuài lè
zhù nǐ shēng rì kuài lè
zhù nǐ yǒngyuǎn kuài lè"

Happy birthday song in Mandarin...I learned it for a
Chinese friends birthday!

I'd send an mp3 of me singing it, but I don't believe in torture.

Happy Birthday Amazing Steve!

And thank you again! :)

[Richard the Weasel-Hearted]

Wow, nursecindy, another amazing coinkidink! My-sister-the-nurse-in-Asheville had her birhday early this month.

[funnyman]

Translation

Wish to you happy birthday
Wish to you happy birthday
Wish to you happy birthday
Wish to you happiness forever

[Cassie]

Happy birthday Steve! I'll read your recap tomorrow.

Finally they're waterboarding Dana.

Renee and Jack

Renee and Jack in action

[Kris L]

The way I figure it, it can't hurt to refridgerate ketchup, right? I also refridgerate bread to make it last longer.

[Jeff Meyerson]

This is a woman who sent her daughter to prison even though it cost her marriage, and she's listening to Handbag?

I mean, WTFBBQ!? Does not compute.

Doesn't she wonder about the "security firm" that Logan just happens to have standing by? Who they are? Apparently not.

This makes the secret frogperson entrance into the White House look believable by comparison.

Nice job, Amazing Steve, and on your birthday to boot. Hope it was a good one.

And Happy Birthday tomorrow, cindy, since I won't be here to say it then.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Also, even Jack usually makes a few good threats against family, thigh, etc. before he starts the torture. Logan's guys asked Dana ONE QUESTION and went right to the waterboarding!

[Steve (The 24 Guy)]

Thanks for the birthday wishes, everyone! And Happy Birthday in advance, Cindy!

[Jeff Meyerson]

I mean, think about the government on 24. It almost makes ours look, well, less bad.

First (and foremost) we had President Allstate. His Vice President was Charles Widmore (LOST), who conspired to remove him from office.

Then we (briefly) had John Keeler, a loser who was shot down by terrorists. He survived, but his Presidency didn't, as Logan was his VP who took over.

Logan's VP was Hal Gardner, played by Ray Wise, better known as the murderer of Laura Palmer and The Devil (on REAPER). He turned out not so bad but lost to Wayne Palmer, who was no President Allstate.

Wayne's VP was the evil Noah Daniels, who conspired against him, had an affair with Evil Lisa, and finally got the job after Wayne's cerebral hemmorhage. He lost to the current hosebag.

Taylor's VP (can't remember his name) was notable only for refusing to do anything to help when General Juma and the Frogpeople (which WBAGNFARB) invaded the White House.

What a crew!

[Moviegirl]

"Redneck Dunk Festival" - your recaps are incredible!! Thanks for the laughs every week.
I don't like Talky Jack, I want Shooty Jack back...

[Elon]

Happy birthday, Steve. Never watch 24, but I always watch your recaps.

[trustf8]

Funny as ever, Steve, & a belated happy b'day - cake is good:)
I still can't believe how boring that episode was...
Thanks Jeff for telling me about MI5 - definitely looked exciting (although when i 1st put it on there were just a bunch of guys playing sudoku on airplane napkins...) but i will try it in the future (hey, it's on 21 - it must be intelligent!)

[Gennita Low]

I'm late but I have a good excuse! I was out celebrating the Amazing Steve's birthday! Okay. I was driving. All the way to Ohio. And it was more exciting than this episode, although the waterboarding part sounded promising.

I'm here to catch up with comments and to read the Amazing Steve's interpretation. Because, you know, as much fun as I was having, I MUST visit the 24 buddies here. I tried at a highway McDonald's last night but obviously, Jack Bauer had been there and destroyed all the free wifi facilities with some pulse bomb.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY AMAZING STEVE!

And hey, everyone. Catch you next week, I hope, after my authorly fun here in Ohio.

[LuvsTardigrades]

Edgar is NOT DEAD! He has been in the Witness Protection Program operating a fish store in Albuquerque. At least, that is what the scriptwriters of the series "In Plain Sight" (USA Network)would have us believe. See Season 5, Episode 3 entitled "Fish or Cut Betta" that aired April 28th. But maybe it's Edgar's Evil Twin......