THERE'S HARA-KIRI
...and then there's this.
(Thanks to DavCat)
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March 30, 2010
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Contributing to this blog:
- "Dave" is Dave Barry, who is a humor columnist and presidential contender.
- "judi" is Judi Smith, who is Dave's Research Department, as well as being interested in men.
- "Walter" is Walter, a bone from the penis of a walrus.
- "Dave" is Dave Barry, who is a humor columnist and presidential contender.
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That's one way to find yourself in a pickle.
Posted by: Not My Usual Alias | March 30, 2010 at 05:05 PM
Dumb a$$. Was he hoping he would die from embarrassment? Because that's the only way this would work.
Posted by: nursecindy | March 30, 2010 at 05:09 PM
Suicide attempt is probably a red herring. Heck, he may have tried to use a red herring.
Posted by: Joshua | March 30, 2010 at 05:26 PM
Gerbils are fond of pickles? Who knew.
Posted by: Wvplantman | March 30, 2010 at 05:29 PM
"Cucumber Enema" WBAGNFARB?
It's always baffled me why Murkins always mangle "hara-kiri" into "harry-carry".
Posted by: Richard the Weasel-Hearted | March 30, 2010 at 05:58 PM
Breaking news, indeed. Maybe that guy who ran naked through the supermarket was shoplifting after all.
Posted by: Horace LaBadie | March 30, 2010 at 05:58 PM
Lock up the salad shooter.
Posted by: bonmot | March 30, 2010 at 06:11 PM
BRILLIANT!
Death by dill.
Posted by: Siouxie | March 30, 2010 at 06:12 PM
Might've werked if he's soaked it in Bear Spit first ...
Posted by: O the U(manity) | March 30, 2010 at 06:17 PM
I'm thinking nobody really believes this was a suicide attempt. What else was he going to tell people?
Posted by: Romeo Vitelli | March 30, 2010 at 06:23 PM
He was found in a pool of blood by his daughter? And she was just standing there? Did she step in it?
Posted by: Tash | March 30, 2010 at 07:07 PM
Take him to Taco Bell and six hours later, AWESOME.
Posted by: Steve | March 30, 2010 at 07:10 PM
NMUA, technically, he was around a pickle.
Posted by: NotSherly, previewing html tags | March 30, 2010 at 07:18 PM
That's a pretty half-sour way to take yourself out.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | March 30, 2010 at 07:46 PM
...while listening to a Manilow CD, no doubt.
Posted by: Clankie | March 30, 2010 at 08:31 PM
People in Hong Kong do it bass-ackwards. In my state, even kids using vegetables shoot themself in the head.
Posted by: Ralph | March 31, 2010 at 01:31 AM
Cucumbers don't kill people, people kill people. Nuff said!
Posted by: mikey | March 31, 2010 at 06:10 AM
Someone should've translated for him that they're not really "spears".
Posted by: bonmot | March 31, 2010 at 10:32 AM
Medics said a severe tear to the man's anus was not life-threatening.
Well, on the bright side, his daughter can be pretty sure he's straight. NTTAWWT
Posted by: Layzeeboy | March 31, 2010 at 03:10 PM