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January 27, 2010


Man smuggled 44 lizards in his underpants

(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson and The Amazing Steve)


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Thank God you all are right up on things. I saw this story this am and Immediately thought I should send it over to Timmy Dorsey in Tampa!

Lizards on the ground
Lizards on the ground
Walking around like a fool with your lizards on the ground

A man who tried to smuggle 44 lizards out of New Zealand in his underwear has been jailed for 14 weeks, fined, and will be deported from the country - minus his pants-lizards.

I bet that hurt....

Dummy - that 15% car insurance discount isn't valid in New Zealand!

Is that 44 lizards in your pocket or ....??

So many jokes, so little energy...

That's gotta tickle a bit.

Noy AGAIN! What is it with the Pants Lizards? I thought they broke up.

"In 2008, he visited with a Swiss reptile dealer."

*Wonders how much of a market there is for Swiss reptiles*

" . . . pleading guilty to two charges under the Wildlife Act and five under the Trade in Endangered Species Act."

You can trade-in endangered species? Whaddaya get for 'em?

Pants lizards are s-kinky.

Guy's being sentenced for shooting a California Condor.

Judge: "Have you got anything to say that might mitigate your sentence?'

Perp: "Well, Judge. My car broke down in Death Valley. I tried walkin' out, but only went one day when the heat and thirst nearly did me in. I saw that buzzard circlin', lower and lower, so I shot it. Eatin' that buzzard's prolly what kept me alive til help came."

Judge: "Well, I have to value human life over any endangered species, so your sentence is suspended. You're free to go."

Perp: "Thank you, your honor."

As he's walking out, the Judge asks, "Say, what did that condor taste like, anyway?"

Perp: "Kinda like a cross between a bald eagle, and a spotted owl."

Were they exploding underpants lizards?

Lizard # 1: Hey, what's that thing ?
Lizard # 2: Darned if I know, but it hasn't said a word the whole trip.

haha clank -

His 'package' contained 44 lizards + 1 one eyed snake

LMAO Clank.

Good one, Clank.

The officers freed the lizards, the 44 lizards of NZ
They found them in his underwear, a-scattered around his buns!
If ever oh ever a lizard shrieked, those lizards shrieked between his cheeks,
Because, because, because, because, because.
Because of the 45th lizard's fuzz.....

Good one mtb!

*Ssssnorks* all around. Very funny, guys.

Sounds like a comment thread at Little Green Footballs...

The Reptilian Underpants WBAGNFARB!

i dunno. lizards in yer drawers...ewwww.

Folks laughed, but this guy was serious when he excused himself to go drain the lizard.

A New Zealander man with a permanent tan -- that's a Maori!

(I'm still chuckling about that one from last week . . .)

Lizards in my pants, exchanging glances,
Wandering in my shorts. What were the chances
I'd be caught at customs with lizards peeking through?

I saw Pants Lizards open for KISS back in '98.

queensbee, that reminds me of a Dave Barry bit about "drawers full of slugs". He was talking about a robot that would collect slugs and eat them for power.

So how did the customs guys know to check him for 'pant lizards', or do they do that for everyone leaving the country?
Most airports check for dangerous things like, I don't know, bombs, guns or knives, but in NZ it's lizards. "Just step through the metal detector, and drop your pants for a mandatory lizard check please"

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