CHRISTMAS IN NIPOMO
(Thanks to catmanmax)
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(Thanks to catmanmax)
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Away in a manger,
No crib for His bed
The little Lord Jesus
Just shot Santa dead
The stars in the sky
Lit the Son of God
The little Lord Jesus
Has just shot his wad
Posted by: SW | December 19, 2009 at 10:04 AM
In the spirit of the Holiday season, as we embrace our Christian and Pagan symbols, let us not forget those who celebrate Hanukkah...
Posted by: Steve Haller | December 19, 2009 at 10:22 AM
Santa: "On Dasher...On Prancer..."
Jesus: PULL!!!
Posted by: Siouxie | December 19, 2009 at 10:29 AM
(I especially like the Cat Mitzvah. He doesn't look too happy, though...)
Posted by: Steve Haller | December 19, 2009 at 10:36 AM
Piece Be with You.
Posted by: trustf8 | December 19, 2009 at 10:57 AM
When you scramble "Santa", what do you get? s-a-t-a-n....SATAN!!
What's wrong with Jesus popping Satan with a double barrel shotgun?
It's long overdue, I say.
Posted by: ChurchLady | December 19, 2009 at 11:22 AM
Suddenly I have this image of Jesus whipping out his 12 gauge and wasting the money changers in the temple...
Posted by: Steve Haller | December 19, 2009 at 11:38 AM
Actually Jesus has the Terminator running interference for him.
Posted by: spazztic | December 19, 2009 at 11:43 AM
wait...there was supposed to be a link on "the Terminator". Didn't do it right apparently. Sorry.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tt17lX0NRxY
Posted by: spazztic | December 19, 2009 at 11:44 AM
*takes the gold, leaves the frankincense and the myrrh (myrhh?)*
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | December 19, 2009 at 11:51 AM
Don't worry, Jesus. No one ever sees Santa's face on a pancake.
Posted by: Clankazoid | December 19, 2009 at 11:58 AM
spazztic's link.
I have no problem with this. I'm sure if Jesus were alive today he'd be shooting Santas, unless he was selling crack in the schoolyard of course.
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | December 19, 2009 at 12:13 PM
"I'm sure if Jesus were alive today he'd be shooting Santas..."
That would be pronounced 'HeyZeus', Jeff
Posted by: trustf8 | December 19, 2009 at 12:22 PM
WWJS-
Who would Jesus Shoot!?
Posted by: PoorRichRichard | December 19, 2009 at 12:41 PM
Red Sox-Yankees.
Lakers-Celtics.
Jesus-Santa.
We got a real barn-burner on our hands this year.
Posted by: phelps101893 | December 19, 2009 at 12:53 PM
In the spirit of the season, I won't say anything about the whiny neighbor lady's name.
Posted by: CJrun | December 19, 2009 at 01:03 PM
*snork* CJ - EXACTLY what I was thinkin' !
Posted by: Account Deleted | December 19, 2009 at 01:16 PM
I saw Jesus shooting Santa Claus
On a lawn in Nipomo last night
He shot that sucker dead
Just before I went to bed
He though I was sleeping
At least that's what he said
Yes, I saw Jesus shooting Santa Claus
But sometimes things aren't as they seem
Saint Nick was selling crack
Jesus took the neighborhood back
Now it's safe for me and you outside!!
Posted by: SW | December 19, 2009 at 01:29 PM
snork @ sw
Hey Santa! Ho, Santa, santa santa, hey,
Santa Hey Santa ho ho ho!
Hey JC, JC - You're allright by me
Shooting Santa, santa Ho! Ho! Ho!
Posted by: trustf8 | December 19, 2009 at 01:42 PM
And Jesus, being the Son of God and all, would need to use a shotgun........why?
I mean, wouldn't a lightning bolt be more dramatic? Or a plague of cannibalistic Elves? Or a really really hot fire at the base of someone's chimney?
C'mon, The God Dude's not a redneck....er....I don't think......?
Posted by: Wolfsong | December 19, 2009 at 02:08 PM
I think a similar idea was the genesis for the South Park cartoon. If I recall correctly it was Jesus vs. Santa in a WWF death-match-in-a-cage idea. Although, I may have just made that up.
Posted by: Joshua | December 19, 2009 at 03:24 PM
Jesus should just leave Santa to me.
Posted by: Jack Bauer | December 19, 2009 at 03:26 PM
Praise the Lord, and pass the ..... er, Praise the Lord!
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | December 19, 2009 at 04:05 PM
Why did he shoot him? Shouldn't he have water-boarded him first to find out where he stashed the loot?
*fluffs cushions on seats in handbasket*
Posted by: Punkin | December 19, 2009 at 05:51 PM
somewhat OT (though I see Jack Bauer has already logged on)
A few clues to the new season FWTW...
/OT
Posted by: Steve Haller | December 19, 2009 at 06:14 PM
Perhaps Santa needed to set up a perimeter.
Posted by: cowhand214 | December 19, 2009 at 06:31 PM
Jesus, a carpenter, was definitely a redneck. It's the folks wearing suits and ties, or fancy dresses with big hats, that don't really get him. Or lots of makeup; especially the people wearing lots of makeup.
Posted by: CJrun | December 19, 2009 at 06:33 PM
You mean like these guys, CJ?
Posted by: Steve Haller | December 19, 2009 at 06:42 PM
"i'm going to make him an offertory he can't refuse."
Posted by: insomniac | December 19, 2009 at 07:27 PM
I think it would be an epic battle but this pic shows the wrong guy with the green.
Posted by: BA | December 19, 2009 at 08:46 PM
CJ: In the spirit of the season, I won't say anything about the whiny neighbor lady's name.
Oh, Susana
Now don't you whine to me
For I come to shoot some Santa
With the shotgun on my knee
Posted by: danceswithvowels | December 20, 2009 at 10:07 AM
Everyone just relax and listen to some nice Christmas music...
Posted by: Steve Haller | December 20, 2009 at 10:37 AM
FTR!! that whiny neighbor...Susana Cruz...is NOT, I repeat..is NOT ME!!
the OTHER Susana Cruz
Posted by: Siouxie | December 20, 2009 at 10:46 AM
Siouxie: one word...
Posted by: Steve Haller | December 20, 2009 at 11:17 AM
(Using the proper English expansion of 'ä' ...)
Doppelgaenger ~ engaged lopper.
Our Siouxie would use a machete, no? Okay, I'm convinced that Nipomo has the other Susana.
Posted by: danceswithvowels | December 20, 2009 at 01:02 PM
Personally, I'm looking at it as a free speech issue. If an artist can plop a crucifix in a jar of urine and call it art, why can't this man express his disgust at the commercialism. There is a difference, however. Some people paid admission to go into the place that showed the artist's(?) display so they did that by choice whereas the property owner's display gives no such option. Parents should be more upset about explaining a photo of an aborted fetus to a child than explaining Jesus shooting Santa. I still say keep it up...free speech forever!!
Posted by: Tovah Janovsky | December 20, 2009 at 03:03 PM
Santa is not a pagan symbol--he's just been turned in to one by modern society. Santa is based on an Eastern Orthodox Bishop by the name of Nicolas. He was famous for giving gifts at Christmas time. He is in no way against the true meaning of Christmas.
Posted by: ken in sc | December 20, 2009 at 05:21 PM
I still liked the South Park version, with Santa against Jesus, using katanas and screaming "There can be only one!" in true Highlander style.
Posted by: Hammond Rye | December 21, 2009 at 08:56 AM