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November 19, 2009


(Thanks to Allen at burrrrppp Division)


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Hey, I thew knat...er that knew.....er, venermind....

Excerpt from my obituary:

"...taken too soon from as at the age of 107, survived by children ages 75,72, 48, 44, 23, 4, and seven months. Alcohol may have been a factor. Interment will be kindly provided by the Guinness company."

"Alcohol 'protects men's hearts'"--not. alas, from the beautiful blogettes!

I demand a recount! er...re-search!

what about the wimmin??????

"People should not be encouraged to drink more as a result of this research"
But they definitely should not be encouraged to drink less, either!

So a Salud is better than a salad?

"And for those who drank anything from three shots to more than 11 shots each day, the risk worked out an average of 50% less" for heart-related deaths,
. . . and a 200% risk increase for bar-fight related deaths.

After much wining, the boffins' spirits were lifted when they were able, just beerly, to gin up enough cointreau for a shot at more research.

11 shots? I'm gonna have to go back and actually read the . . . nah.

"People should not be encouraged to drink more as a result of this research."

Too late.

It's surprising how many heart-healthy folks are featured in the stories linked to by this blog.

" Fell off his barstool " is the more common cause on a drunk's death certificate.

Get ready for an epidemic of extremely healthy drunk dumbasses. "Hold my beer and watch this. Don't worry, it's healthy". At least Dave will never lack for blog items.

Am I the only one who is upset about a binge being defined as four or more drinks in four hours? When I was younger, four or more drinks was a good start for a party. A binge was when you couldn’t remember where you left your car and didn’t find it or come home until Tuesday morning. This is defining normality down in my opinion. BTW, women lack a certain enzyme that men have which allows them to tolerate and digest alcohol. It's not our fault, that’s just the way it is.

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