STARRING NICOLAS CAGE AS KEN

Barbie: The Movie

(Thanks to Brian Duval)

Vaguely Related Update: American Girl's Newest Doll is Homeless

(But not cheap)

(Thanks to nursecindy)

Comments

[nursecindy]

I still like the old girl. But I'm not sure about Nicholas Cage as Ken. Come to think of it I cannot think of any real man portraying Ken.

[Barbie]

Math is hard.

[padraig]

I remember somebody projected out Barbie's proportions up to human scale, and she was something like 6' tall and 40-18-36.

So what I'm saying is I'm available to help with the casting calls.

[Clankazoid]

I wondering if they're considering my screenplay, where a 500 ft high Barbie breaks a nail while crushing Tokyo in her dream car ?

[Braniff]

Since they use real life actresses as models for the dolls in the line, then they should make movie Barbie an actress. Think of the plotline: Barbie becomes a coke addict, goes to rehab "because of stress", gets cast for a movie, sleeps with every actor, actress and crew member on the set, marries Ken (now a tattooed rocker), has a child, but divorces within a year, then writes a tell-all book about her troubled upbringing.

[queensbee]

Like your scenario braniff. seems right. we could add that she slept with her skank father, but...

[Siouxie]

What about gay Ken? (NTTAWWT) Who's playing him?

[wiredog]

Braniff and qb,
Sounds like you ought to go to Hellywood. Or have already escaped from there.

[Jeff Meyerson]

Too bad Anna Nicole is dead, Braniff.

[MartiniShark]

Pamela Anderson might work out: She's blonde, proportionately accurate and, just like Barbie, she's made of 70% post-consumer products.

[Stev0]

They should NOT cast Keanu Reeves as Ken - Keanu doesn't have as many facial expressions as Ken does.

[nursecindy]

I'm guessing Rosanne Barr and Rosie O'Donnell aren't being considered for the part of Barbie.

[Mahatma Kane Jeeves (aka Brian)]

Then how about Nicolas Cage as Superman?

[Layzeeboy]

Nice plotline, Braniff. Who can play her meddling mother/"manager"? I'm thinking Fran Drescher.

[nursecindy]

Since dolls with books are so popular and so expensive maybe Dave and Ridley should come out with a Peter And The Star Catchers doll. I'd buy one.

[bonmot]

Martini, Pamderson's got after-market equipment? Say it ain't so!

[bonmot]

Homeless American Girl Doll.

Sure, why not? She can play with crack ho

- Barbie.

[bonmot]

Oops. Didn't mean to post a picture. Just the link. Sorry.

(Hmmmm. Don't know my own powers. IT guys hate me.)

[Braniff]

Barbie, played by Angelina Jolie, can adopt Homeless Gwen.

[Steve]

My girls are grown now. If they had been involved in this movie it would be in the horror genre. All their Barbies wound up naked and headless.

[BA]

John Cleese on nicolas cage

[nursecindy]

Thank you for that clip BA. I absolutely love John Cleese. I have all of the dvd's of Fawlty Towers and still laugh everytime I see them. Oh Basil!!!!

[BA]

FTowers, my favorite sitcom of all time.