WE'RE GONNA NEED A BIGGER SHOE
Police Called To Kill Huge Tarantula In Calif.
(Thanks to Ralph)
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Police Called To Kill Huge Tarantula In Calif.
(Thanks to Ralph)
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It's breeding season, and they like to be out at night.
So tarantulas are basically college frat boys.
I used to live in southern Utah, where tarantulas were common. They're basically harmless. People make pets out of them and pet them
and hug them and squeeze them and call them George.The scorpions, now, those you have to look out for! Nothing like waking up at 5 AM having to pee, walking into the bathroom, and there's a scorpion there, waving his claws and stinger, with an attitude of "Go! Step on me! Do it!"
Posted by: wiredog | May 29, 2009 at 07:25 AM
If it had an arm going on the door why didn't she just open the door and push it outside with a broom? Then spray it until it either died from the spray or drowned. Or just throw it in the neighbors yard.
Posted by: nursecindy | May 29, 2009 at 08:17 AM
Her request to officers? "Pull the gun out and shoot it," Michelle said.
Either that or use giant clown shoes (which WBAGNFARB).
*makes note - stay out of southern Utah*
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | May 29, 2009 at 08:19 AM
Classic William Shatner movie, Kingdom of the Spiders.
Posted by: Horace LaBadie | May 29, 2009 at 08:31 AM
Don't taze me, bro.
Posted by: The Poor Arachnid | May 29, 2009 at 08:48 AM
Horace,
I must admit. I saw Kingdom of the Spiders. On late night TV. Back in the 80's. Before I gave up. Late night weed-fueled cheetos-and-crappy-movie binges.
Just one of the many reasons that Demon Weed is Bad.
Posted by: wiredog | May 29, 2009 at 09:11 AM
I think she needs to move to a place where she won't be disturbed by real life.
Also, I want to know how she can read the mind of a tarantula to know that "it had no intention of leaving anytime soon."
Posted by: ScottMGS | May 29, 2009 at 09:15 AM
"If it had an arm going on the door why didn't she just open the door and push it outside with a broom? Then spray it until it either died from the spray or drowned. Or just throw it in the neighbors yard."
Considering the size, it might have wrestled the broom away from her and shooed HER outside.
I would have shot it. I also have a sword and throwing knives I would have considered using, but the sword has the same problem as the broom and is more dangerous.
I normally LIKE spiders, but that was obviously an escapee from a research lab where they are trying to make super-soldiers by splicing human and spider DNA. Happens all the time: one of the rejects gets away and learns martial arts then goes on a killing spree until someone discovers that it has a weakness for shaving cream and fills up a bunch of water balloons and...... why are you looking at me like that?
Posted by: Will | May 29, 2009 at 09:26 AM
Does anybody have Will's medication handy?
Posted by: nursecindy | May 29, 2009 at 09:28 AM
What's much scarier than the spider picture is whatever's crawling on Gary Diamond's head... IT should be squashed with a cup & beaten to a pulp!
*do NOT click on the 'Diamond Furniture' ad*
Posted by: trustf8 | May 29, 2009 at 09:33 AM
Horace, I saw Kingdom of the Spiders too! A classic
while stoned, like Up in Smoke.Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | May 29, 2009 at 09:35 AM
I thought of the eerie final scene of that movie when I saw the car covered in caterpillar webs the other day...
a href="http://www.amazon.com/Tarantula-Region-2-John-Agar/dp/B00161ISR4/ref=sr_1_2?ie=UTF8&s=dvd&qid=1243608359&sr=1-2">And let's not forget...
Posted by: Steve Haller | May 29, 2009 at 10:46 AM
That should have been
And let's not forget...
Posted by: Steve Haller | May 29, 2009 at 10:47 AM
I am always amused by people who are terrified of things that can't actually hurt us. Fear is a valuable commodity. Don't waste it on spiders that are beneficial and generally harmless. Some day you might really need that adrenaline jolt. Like during an audit.
Posted by: Steve | May 29, 2009 at 11:26 AM
Many of The Shat's performances are improved when viewed under the influence of
large quantities of recreational drugsa crowd of friends who are alsostonedmovie buffs.Posted by: Horace LaBadie | May 29, 2009 at 12:17 PM
Has everyone forgotten so soon? She should have lit the spider (and the house) on fire.
Posted by: Tash | May 29, 2009 at 01:34 PM
Yup, that fear thing is so weird. Luckily we have
drugsmeditation to help us keep perspective, and recognize the things to really fear, like global warming, economic meltdown, nuclear holocaust, Dick Cheny, ex-es, clowns....Posted by: Tash | May 29, 2009 at 01:37 PM
Giant Clifford farts....
Posted by: Tash | May 29, 2009 at 01:39 PM
Tash, my ex was a clown that made me want to have a nuclear meltdown. Hey! That rhymed!
Posted by: nursecindy | May 29, 2009 at 02:12 PM
I have to admit I probably would have called the police for a monster spider like that.
Posted by: Margaritaville | May 29, 2009 at 02:25 PM
Tarantulas are not poisonous. That woman was being silly.
Posted by: peterpan | May 29, 2009 at 03:12 PM
nursecindy - so the ex-clown was a Dick? LOTS to fear.
Posted by: Tash | May 29, 2009 at 07:51 PM
Bah... Florida wildlife is much more threatening.
*looks suspiciously towards the Everglades*
Posted by: djtonyb | May 29, 2009 at 10:07 PM
Tash, he not only WAS a Dick, he still is. ;-)
Posted by: nursecindy | May 29, 2009 at 10:21 PM
I would have been tempted to pull out the creme brulee torch...
Posted by: cowprintrabbit | May 30, 2009 at 06:22 AM