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May 26, 2009


HOLDEN, Maine — Wanted: a few dozen individuals willing to spend a night howling like wolves in Maine’s North Woods, and who won’t be scared off if they get a response.

(Thanks to Danny)


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Methinks the 'responses' will be other drunken volunteers howling back.

I looked up Holden, ME and it's only about 20 mins. from Bangor. Perhaps someone that knows, or plays in a band with, Stephen King should let him know. This could be a good book. Young couple out howling like wolves. Suddenly a wolf like they've never seen creeps up on them. Eyes glowing red. Take it away Mr. King.

Ron, beware. Or be a werewolf.
(Is the bot eating anyone else's posts?)

navigating the constant controversy swirling around

How does one navigate swirling controversy?


Yep, just another Saturday night in Miami.

Inasmuch as the rate of swirling controvery remains constant, one ought to be able to navigate easily, provided there is a full mo-WOOO-ooon.

Would it be okay to be scared off if the response escalates from vocal to physical?

As long as the response doesn't include humping one's leg.

I grew up in that area and the most popular fake name when calling in to radio stations or what have you was always Dick Hertz from Holden. (it's a high-class kinda place)

Whaddya mean, fake?

Confirmed Wolves WBAGNFARB

I hope they remember to dress appropriately...

Howlin' Wolf WBAGNFA blues musician.

I actually lived in Holden till I was 13. I went to school in Bangor ("Bangah") much of that time and most of my classmates had never even heard of Holden (less than ten miles away). Now here it is in a major scientific research publication (I refer, of course, to Dave Barry's Blog).

I have had some downright weird things happen to photos on some of my trips back to Bangah. I wonder if SK had a hand in it?

Now I live in Wisconsin. When I look at a tree line here, I know there are fields and roads somewhere beyond it. When you look at a tree line in Maine, there's always the feeling that the forest just goes on forever. Wolves? Not a doubt in my mind.

Also sounds like my drunken karaoke nights

I've never been to Maine but if it's anything like Michigan, both wolves and researchers will be eaten by the mosquitoes. Those things carry steak knives and would laugh at our tame little Florida critters.

Some additional comments.
1. I left Maine because Stephen King complained I was creeping him out.
2. When I heard people on TV with New England accents, I thought "people up there don't sound like that." Then I went back for a visit. Oh, yes, they DO sound like that.
3. Up here in the Skeeter Belt, we save gas all summer. We get in the car, let them poke through the roof, then bend the beaks over with a hammer. The only way to fly.

♭ Saw an Eastern gray wolf with a menu for his goods,
Walkin' through the streets of Holden in the rain,
He was lookin' for morons howlin' in the woods,
Gonna get a big dish of fools up in Maine. ♫

♪ AAAAHOOOOO! Gray wolves of Holden!

ahh! good one, frodo. I can still hear SK singing that!

Thanks, Siouxie. My only problem is, now the dern tune is going to be traipsing through my mind for a week and a half and I've got nobody to blame but myself! BTW, who's SK? I've only heard the original version by Warren Zevon...

SK = Stephen King - I saw him sing that along with the Rock Bottom Remainders in NYC a couple of years ago. Classic moment!

Now it all falls into place! That WOULD be classic! I've lived a sheltered life and have not yet seen RBR, but one of my life goals is to see them!

Then you need to get your butt to Miami during the Book Fair in November ;-P


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