BE ON THE LOOKOUT

Woman Allegedly Steals Brand New Breasts

(Thanks to Ron Barrett)

Comments

[Scott]

She really should pay some sort of restitution. Tit for tat, I always say...

[wiredog]

I can't think of anything to say that wouldn't be rude, crude, and subject to a lifetime commenting ban.

[Danny]

Employees ... were able to identify Pampellonne as a suspect in this case after viewing a photograph line-up.

I'll bet she really stood out.

[Siouxie]

So...how are they gonna get those back?

[Elon Weintraub]

Wait till she find out about the implanted dye packets...

[Cheesewiz]

So the story is really about identity theft. I wonder why they didn't lead with that?

[Margaritaville]

I think most guys are always on the lookout.

[pogo o'possum]

Anyone other that me think the perp looks...ummm...well...mannish? (NTTAWWT)

[Margaritaville]

If you're going to go to jail, what *good* things are new breasts going to do for you?

[fivver]

Grand theft indeed!

[nursecindy]

I thought she looked a little mannish myself pogo. In fact one of the commenters on the page about the theft thought so too. And I agree NTTAWWT. Wouldn't this be kind of a turn off for guys? No matter how big the stolen boobs are.

[padraig]

I swear, I will search EVERY nook and cranny...

But first I'm gonna need a fuller picture of the perp. An "after" picture, of course, strictly for identification purposes. I AM a professional, after all.

[Meanie the Blue]

To the headline writer: thanks for clarifying. I was wondering whether they might be used ones.

[Meanie the Blue]

She flat-out lied.

[Mike Antonucci]

"Woman Allegedly Steals Brand New Breasts"

As opposed to what, stale, day-old breasts? Gently used breasts? Previously owned breasts?

[Siouxie]

Well..now they will be used breasts.

[Allen at Division]

Oh, sure!... Show a picture of his her face! How's that supposed to help?

[Allen at Division]

...and yes, Cindy, no matter how big (or nice and shiny and new) her pampellonnes are, a sufficiently scary face is a turn-off.

[Mot the Hoople]

Padraig, don't you mean to search every crook and nanny?

I bet the cops are calling this the boob job.

[Siouxie]

I think this whole story is overinflated.

[Mot the Hoople]

Yup! Sooz, I think it's a case of making mountains out of molehills

[Mahatma Kane Jeeves]

If they did a good enough job, she will never get caught because of the photo . . .

[Jeff Meyerson]

Key name: nne Pampellonne

See, she should have called herself Pamplemousses which is French for grapefruits - which would have been a big clue.

As opposed to what, stale, day-old breasts? Gently used breasts? Previously owned breasts?

Posted by: Mike Antonucci | March 24, 2009 at 11:53 AM

Exactly what I thought, Mike! I especially like "gently used."

[Horace LaBadie]

I think that a road block and checkpoint is needed in this case. Enlarge the grid.

[MartiniShark]

This might encourage more people to "Take a Bite Outta Crime".

[Layzeeboy]

I dunno, I just can't get pumped up about this story.

[Mahatma Kane Jeeves]

It's better to use used ones . . .

[Loudmouth]

MKJ, Yikes. Big used boob sale to be followed by a bigger used boob sale. Recycling can be good.

[Mahatma Kane Jeeves]

Loudy: mebbee she should install all three pair, in a tiered fashion, now THAT would get some attention . . .

[Loudmouth]

Picture of culprit