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February 23, 2009

TO MAKE MATTERS WORSE, NONE OF THEM HAD GOVERNMENT-ISSUED PHOTO IDs

Snakes in a suitcase.

Snakemain_739370a

Question: A hanger?

(Thanks to catmanmax)

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Homeland Security Flunky # 1: "Ok, Bob, open the case."

Homeland Security Flunky # 2: "F##k you. You open the case."

"Nope. Don't think so. Let him pass?"

"Yeah."

Sock Lizard WBAGNFARB.

yes, dave, a hanger. how else will you get the wrinkles out of them when you reach your hotel? steaming in the shower is preferred over those little travel irons.

crossgirl, I thought the same thing when I saw the photo. It's good to know I'm not the only practical woman on this blog.

The Only thing Missing from the scene: SAMUEL L. JACKSON

Don't ask me about the weird things I've seen in luggage.

Didn't I say don't ask?

Aren't those things supposed to be in clear one-quart resealable plastic bags?

Yes, sir, we still have seats available for this flight. Were you interested in First Class, Business Class, or Writhing?

There is no way I would inspect peoples luggage because finding something like this would be a nightmare for life. I have an extreme fear of snakes and mice. Maybe the hanger was so they could hang up any skin they shed? And since no one else has asked I will. What weird things have you seen in luggage Mitch?

I thought Socks was dead.
Not in Australia.

Ok, since you twisted my arm, a short list:

Various kinds of international foods that the agricultural inspectors search through including homemade blood sausage.

A woman going to spend some time with her new beau in the U.K. had a dildo which she begged me not to reveal by lifting the clothing that was covering it.

A guy was transporting newly purchased dumbbells in his luggage which nearly made the bag overweight. I couldn't help but wonder if there aren't stores in his hometown that also sell weights.

And why on earth would a passenger need carburetor cleaner? Was he hoping to complete some automotive maintenance will he was on vacation?

ummm I didn't realize they were snakes because some of them look like... well the tip looks like... ya know...

I'm going to assume nursecindy doesn't work in the ER

Part of this is the fault of the airlines -- they will take pit bulls and psychotic cats as baggage, but not harmless pet lizards and snakes. Those have to go Fed-Ex at outrageous prices. If people could travel with reptiles legally, it might stop some of the abuse, although there's no excuse for smuggling endangered or poisonous species. As a biologist, I'd much rather deal with a boa or a skink than a snarling hellhound. Snakes on a plane? No problem. 150 lb. wolf-dog hybrids? Big problem.

*approaches customs*

"They are my emotional support endangered species"

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