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January 26, 2009

TRUTH, JUSTICE, AND THE AUSTRALIAN WAY

A man who uses water instead of toilet paper says he was sacked for his "un-Australian" toilet habits.

(Thanks to Matt Filar and DavCat)

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Key Quote: If it wasn't so disgusting it would almost be laughable

Well, since it has officially been DaveBlogged™, then this has gone beyond 'almost laughable' to 'utterly snark-worthy.'

Australia is such a nanny society you have to fill out a form in triplicate before taking a dump, so the government can determine whether it's safe for you to do so.

Ummmmmm.... okay.......

wonders if bidet ownership is criminal.

So...you can't use water down under??

Siouxie,---Only half right.You can't use water down under,down under.

They just didn't want anything untoward to happen.

because it flows countercockwise.

Annie, only if you pull the plug out gently

*because my eyesight ain't what it used to be, belated had-to-read-it-twice SNORK at Annie*

he should patent his portable bidet device.

LMAO Annie. I, too, missed that at first glance. Mustabeen a shrimp on the barbie.

Actually, they jailed him because every time he came out of the bathroom he did the "a-bidet a-bidet a-bidet That's All Folks!" joke.

Gets on your nerves after a while.

Eew.


That is all.

And as I stated on a previous thread -

"WASH YOUR HANDS, PEOPLE!!!

There, now that is all.

The solution to pollution is dilution.

(the same works for the undercarriage, I believe)

I can only imagine what they'd think of my sandpaper.

Ruff!

*passes Clankazoid a Sears and Roebuck catalog*

So what does he do with the water bottle after he wipes his @$$ with it?

Clankazoid has bloody 'roids?

(Sorry)

Punkin: EWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!

Diva - Thanks! *bows*

Please don't squeeze the water bottle?

Reminds me of an old saying (adapted here): "You can pick your @@ss, and you can pick your friends, but you can't pick your friend's @@ss".

So, he wants squatter's rights?

After all this, I still don't know exactly how the bottle or it's contents was/were employed/deployed.

And frankly, my dear...

I've known a few Aussie a$$holes, and none of them could be accused of being clean.

Jack Bauer would never do that.

*tick, tick, tick...*

Annie, Jack Bauer does not poop.

That would explain many of his facial expressions.

.
Wow, what a great place to work! The boss follows you into the toilet and offers to wipe you! Put another shrimp on the barbie for me, matey!

Wait, the boss is a hot kinky chick, right? Right?


Of interest to bloggers: NY Times settles with GateHouse Media. Now linking may be illegal. Or not. It's "negotiable."
.

Sacked?

As the Beastie Boys would sing:

You've gotta fight...(*dooh, dooh*) for your right...(*dooh, dooh, dooh, dooh, dooh*) to POTTY!

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