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STOCKHOLM, Sweden (AP) — A school has confiscated an 8-year-old boy's birthday party invitations after they were handed out during class because it said it had a duty to ensure against discrimination.
(Thanks to John Ditchman, Jeff Meyerson and sjhaller)
Key Quote: Dr. Greenberg described it as “like a bar mitzvah.” It had an open bar, a disc jockey and performers on stilts during cocktail hour. The dinner buffet included carving, pasta and dim sum stations.
Which raises the question: Carving WHAT?
(Thanks to Elon Weintraub)
(Thanks to Siouxie onterrible, who is not Siouxie)
Experts estimate each commercial airliner is struck by lightning once or twice a year. While it can sometimes leave a burn mark, it is unusual for lightning to punch through the skin of a modern jet.
(Thanks to DavCat)
...this blog cannot deviate from its strict policy against linking to sites containing names that people might make fun of. We apologize for any inconvenience.
(Thanks to Adam)
(Thanks to Matt Filar)
Woman Says Fake Fruit Ruined Her Implant
(Thanks to Larry Maretll)
We will not be able to draw your attention to the second author listed for this book.
(Thanks to The Amazing Steve&trade)
(Thanks to sjhaller and Siouxie)
It's getting so a man can't walk along an interstate highway wearing a thong, fake breasts and a wig.
(We mean the man was wearing them. The interstate highway was wearing a tutu.)
(Thanks to Siouxie)
Early recordings of Tom Jones singing in a toilet are expected to be sold at auction for £3,000.
(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson and Siouxie)
They are wrong.
(Thanks to Baron vonKlyff)
Get indoors now.
(Thanks to B. Kizer and The Perts)
(Thanks to sjhaller)
(Thanks to sjhaller)
(Thanks to sjhaller)
(Thanks to Peter Metrinko and Annie where-but-here)
Now they want to take away the fundamental human right to change your name from Variable to an obscenity.
(Thanks to sjhaller and dfjazzzz)
'Manure-Bomb' Thieves Fall Into Dung, Flee Crime Scene Naked
(Thanks to DavCat and DMS and Larry Potter)
...you're talking Golden Spurtle.
(Thanks to Andrew Hoenig)
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VAN BUREN, Ark. (AP) — Crawford County authorities say an inmate escaped the county jail and left behind a rose fashioned out of toilet paper because he felt sorry for breaking out.
(Thanks to Amy Drees, Siouxie, sjhaller and Jeff Meyerson)
(Thanks to Ken in Jax)
Colorado stole your mountain.
Key Innocent Phrase From Story That Sounds Vaguely Obscene Out Of Context: ...who has bagged all 54 of Colorado 14ers...
(Thanks to jon harris)
(Thanks to sjhaller and Claire Martin and Anil Haji)
Wim Delvoye has been tattooing pigs since the 1990s.
(Thanks to Claire Martin)
(Thanks to Siouxie and Steve [The Other Steve] Lancaster)
...you'll have to come up with your own surrender joke.
(Thanks to The Perts)
Snakes in a Parcel: "Just leave it alone," Gaye Hurst told her husband. "We don't know what kind of snake it is. It's from Indiana."
(Thanks to W. von Papineau)
Key Quote Indicating Overall Level Of Classiness: A gospel choir and a priest singing Elvis tunes will provide the soundtrack to the festivities.
Key Swedish Name That We Are Not Making Fun Of: Jerker Asterlund:
(Thanks to sjhaller)
We can grow asparagus on Mars.
(Thanks to sjhaller and Jeff Matthews)
...we're wondering if drugs may have been involved.
(Thanks to Chuck)
...so if you're in a place where you can crank the volume a little, you should take a few minutes and watch this.
We realize it's old, but it's not old to this blog. Nothing is old to this blog.
(Thanks to Ilene Waterstone)
...Is being FedExed to this woman immediately.
(Thanks to Larry Odom and Chuck)
(Thanks to Siouxie)
(Thanks to LM)
Belated Advisory (Thanks to Siouxie): Do not watch the video if you do not wish to hear crude language, or if you have a child in college.
(Thanks to Heather Mays)
They will first force us to watch this.
(Thanks to Annie Woof-bark-here)
There's a renegade cow on the lam.
(Thanks to The Perts)
(Thanks to sjhaller)
...we need to take a hard took at dinner forks and frozen chicken.
(Thanks to Matt Filar)
