FLORIDA PARENT OF THE WEEK SO FAR
(Thanks to Justin Barber)
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(Thanks to Justin Barber)
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She really looks her part.
Posted by: Elon Weintraub | February 05, 2008 at 08:02 AM
Don't ya'll mistake your baby for the beer too?
Me either.
Posted by: Siouxie | February 05, 2008 at 08:07 AM
"Williams faces charges of driving under the influence, child endangerment, driving without a valid license running a red light not having a seatbelt or child restraint, or a brain. She will be involuntarily sterilized and sent to the South Pole."
FINALLY! My tax dollars put to good use!!
Posted by: Punkin | February 05, 2008 at 08:25 AM
Local authorities are expected to throw the book at Williams, according to one sherrif's deputy who says, "Endangering a child's welfare like that? For Busch beer!? I mean, c'mon!"
Posted by: Lairbo | February 05, 2008 at 08:50 AM
"the book"?? can't they just throw a brick at her?
Posted by: Siouxie | February 05, 2008 at 08:51 AM
i can't believe this isn't britney.
at least the baby wasn't in a shopping bag in the trunk.
Posted by: crossgirl | February 05, 2008 at 09:03 AM
If you use a seat belt to buckle in your six pack, you might be a redneck.
Posted by: Expat_Canuck | February 05, 2008 at 09:16 AM
Another fine upstanding citizen.
Posted by: Mot the Hoople | February 05, 2008 at 09:35 AM
That's not "Tina Williams". That's Tina Yothers.
Posted by: 9 | February 05, 2008 at 09:45 AM
Next time.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | February 05, 2008 at 10:11 AM
I'm sorry, but stories like this make me sick. Boozin' crack-smokin' low-lifes allowed to reproduce just to pollute and endanger the life of an innocent child that someone else would die for.
BTW 9, the period goes inside the quotes. Thank you.
Posted by: snif | February 05, 2008 at 10:25 AM
Hey, the bottom line is kids bounce and beer don't. Well, not as good, anyway.
Posted by: padraig the redneck | February 05, 2008 at 10:32 AM
A woman has to keep her busch safe for later use.
Posted by: JamesEC666 | February 05, 2008 at 10:33 AM
Snork @ JEC666.
That Busch needs to be sprayed with Round-up. Clearly, it is diseased and grown from a bad seed.
Posted by: Meditrina | February 05, 2008 at 10:40 AM
No mention that the child was placed with Children's Services either. GRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!!
Posted by: DeskDiva | February 05, 2008 at 11:20 AM
snif, you need a comma after boozin'. Thank you.
Posted by: Editor-in-Chief | February 05, 2008 at 11:23 AM
Somebody needs to strap her bush.
Posted by: Layzeeboy | February 05, 2008 at 11:24 AM
Layzee, and glue it shut.
Posted by: Siouxie | February 05, 2008 at 11:26 AM
I knew there was a valuable use for butt glue.
Posted by: snif | February 05, 2008 at 11:37 AM
Appears to be a pattern of behavior here...
Posted by: Afkat | February 05, 2008 at 11:46 AM
No license, was running out of gas, "didn't know" why the baby wasn't buckled in, DRIVING DRUNK...
Bolsters argument for involuntary sterilization.
Throw the book at her and please remove the child before it's too late.
Posted by: Coconuts | February 05, 2008 at 12:17 PM
...and snif, you shouldn't end a sentence with a preposition. And, "Boozin' crack-smokin' low-lifes allowed to reproduce just to pollute and endanger the life of an innocent child that someone else would die for" seems to be a fragment. Thank you.
Posted by: Associate Editor | February 05, 2008 at 02:11 PM
"...and snif, you shouldn't end a sentence with a preposition."
"Butt glue" is a preposition?
Posted by: padraig | February 05, 2008 at 03:10 PM
Fragments are incomplete sentences. Fragments are pieces of sentences that have become disconnected from the main clause. Therefore, when two trains are heading in opposite directions, one at 75 mph and the other at 90 mph, no matter which way you look at it, butt glue is still a noun.
Posted by: snif | February 05, 2008 at 04:06 PM
"Boozin' crack-smokin' low-lifes allowed to reproduce just to pollute and endanger the life of an innocent child that someone else would die for" lacks a predicate. You could easily remedy this by inserting "are" in between "low-lifes" and "allowed." Either way, "for" is still a preposition. You may still take consolation in the fact that you know where to place a period. Thank you.
Posted by: Associate Editor | February 05, 2008 at 04:44 PM
My father ended his single life by giving my mother a preposition of marriage. And my cousin began her menses cycle when sent to prison. She began a sentence with a period. Don't ask about my grammar.
Posted by: JEC666 | February 05, 2008 at 07:28 PM
I may know where to place a period, but I haven't had one in years.
Posted by: snif | February 05, 2008 at 08:21 PM
I know that rule that a period (or comma) goes inside the quotation marks but I disagree with it and therefore choose not to abide by it. I figure if I do it long enough it'll eventually become acceptable. I've never heard a reason why it needs to be that way. I just know that the woman's name was "Tina Williams", not "Tina Williams.".
Posted by: ScottMGS | February 06, 2008 at 09:01 AM