WHERE IS THE NATIONAL GUARD?

The temperature in Florida is seventeen thousand degrees below zero. We are fighting for our very survival.

Comments

[Larry Martell]

Are you sure you're not still in Colorado?

[russellmc]

If it snows, make sure Walter wears his rubbers...

[Meanie the Blue]

Has Walter gone, er, soft? He's from a walrus, fer cryin' out loud!

[crossgirl]

it's warmed all the way up to 37 here, i may be able to take my gloves and coat off by noon.

[Siouxie]

Dave is right. I had to walk 3 dogs this morning and froze my culo off!

I did NOT want to come to work this morning. First day back and it's gotta be the coldest day of the millennium, so far.

[Siouxie]

Hey, when did the Herald take my picture???

cg, I still have two layers of clothing on. No gloves though. Where's that burning bra when you need it???

[AmerInParis]

Too bad you aren't a middle-aged woman, Dave. You'd be strolling around Florida in short-sleeves and shorts.

[tropichunt.com guy™]

Walter looks chilled to the bone.

[SquirlCat41]

Speaking from a part of the world that is currently 12 degrees, not counting the 20 mph winds, I am packing my bags for Miami

[snif]

Something tells me the folks up north don't feel sorry for us.

[Meanie the Blue]

Silver lining: The weirdness magnet may become a superconductor.

[Elon Weintraub]

I agree with Squirl. Hard to feel any real pity for yu guy and gals.

[Siouxie]

I'm guessing they're laughing their equally frozen asses off, snif.

I SEE YOU LAUGHING, PUNKIN!!!

[Doc Rick]

Where's the ALGORE when ya need him? This is obviously a crisis of apocalyptic proportions. By the way, it's a balmy 39 degrees in the greater Angleton, Texas metroplex.

[Meanie the Blue]

*Counts the local degrees. Stops at 11*

*Attempts to thaw out a package of sympathy*

[random thunking]

I'm not sure what, exactly, a "culo" is. But I'm having a great time imagining what it might be.

"I'll have a vente double-shot no-foam latte and a raspberry culo."

[Siouxie]

LOL random...uh...

[Hammond Rye]

*Looks outside. Sees thermometer pegged at 16 degrees. Sees trees bent by wind that makes the temperature equal to 5 degrees. Notes (smugly) that cats do not need to be walked*

[wickedwitch]

my mom called this morning whining and moaning about how cold it was. this is the first time she has had to turn on her brand new heat pump for heat. of course, at 80 degrees she wears a sweater, so i figured she was talking about 60 degrees this morning. her front porch thermometer on Marco Island was reading 39 degrees and now she's talking about moving even farther south, like Cuba.

[Meanie the Blue]

Never raspberry a culo; the reply would not necessarily be pretty.

[Siouxie]

*WAVES frozen hand @ Hammie!!!*

(btw, I've got one of those too. I was thanking God for my cat)

[Mot The Hoople]

And they call it global WARMING WTFBBQ.

[The Dread Pirate Chris]

So all of you Floridians would prefer this weather pattern?

It was 15°F in my backyard this morning, y'all.

[SpecialNobodie]

Those of us in Chicago laugh at your balmy 30-degree weather. Or cry. It's too cold to tell, really.

Actually the funniest part of that story for me, was the guy who talked about the "Flight of the Penguins". HAR! Must be the cold slowing his thoughts.

[AmerInParis]

Well, it's 5 degrees here....

-- 5 C --

[theresa v.]

It was 9 degrees (not counting the wind chill) when I left my house at 6.15 this morning...sorry, no sympathy for Florida

[AmerInParis]

"*WAVES frozen hand @ Hammie!!!*

(btw, I've got one of those too. I was thanking God for my cat)"

Me three! Mine is getting on a bit, so she loves cuddling anytime, but especially in COLD WEATHER!

[Siouxie]

*takes cheese and whine*

pffffffffft!!

[SW]

Maybe it's time to change your light bulbs back.

[Hammond Rye]

*Waves @ Siouxie!!!*

[CTProf]

Mornin' all! Yes, it's a bit chilly here... but a nice change if you ask me (knows Siouxie wasn't asking me though LOL). My Mom actually got a few snow flurries this morning... she's only about 15 miles north of here.

[Siouxie]

I was NOT asking, Prof. I know you love this freezing weather.

BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR no thank you.

[AreWeThereYet]

At these temperatures, I have a whole new list of excuses for not going to work on time:
1) The car battery was dead
2) My water pipes froze
3) I was covering my plants with blankets
4) I was unthawing the lock to my car door with a hairdryer.

If this cold spell continues, I may only be working 4 hour days. I could use more excuses from the northern folks, though.

[SPC ARNG]

Sitting here just south of Baghdad. Let us know when you have a real emergency. WOLF!!!!!

[rob]

WAAA WAAA It was 14 deg here this morning 10 degrees yesterday......

I bet everyone in florida is running around in artic parkas and about 3 layers of cold to keep them warm.

[Siouxie, blogging from the frozen tundra]

SPC ARNG - thank you for your service.

WOOF back atcha!!!

rob, that would have been me this morning.

[Olo Baggins of Bywater]

How's the weather just south of Baghdad, SPC?

Here, we've had about 18 inches of snow since Tuesday. Early morn temp near the lake: 22. 20 miles away: 2.

[random thunking]

rob, the people in SoFla don't have artic parkas. They have stuff like "tennis sweaters" and "wind breakers". When it gets this cold, they do more hunkerin' that they do during a hurricane.

Of course, give Minneapolis 9 inches of blowing snow and 20 below wind chills and they call it "a nice day for a walk".

[queensbee]

waaaaaah. it was -2 this morning in beautiful albany ny. with a nice deep coat of fresh snow. i had to wear lots of stuff. felt like a kid in a snowsuit. so, y'all.... bite me.

[Suzy Q]

I LOVE this weather! A balmy 42 degrees when I left for work this morning. All my neighbors' windows are shut tight against the freezing onslaught and mine are wide open. Only a light sweater for me. This is convertible weather, and a good thing I have one!

Siouxie, why you so cold?

[crossgirl]

throws frozen orange at suzyq......

are we there yet, i knew i had something wrong when i explained i was for work because i was covering my blankets with plants. i'll do better tomorrow.

[Guin]

Wimps. It was 4* this morning at my house in Massafreezeits.

[Siouxie]

*teeth chattering as she tries to bite queenie*

[O the U(manity)]

AmerinParis -- 5 degrees, eh? How much is that in me ... um ...

So ... y'all that complain of it bein' cold are nuthin' but a buncha pu ... um ...

So ... How about them Mets?

[ellie]

The Florida Polar Bear Club must be getting ready to go for their swim.

[Meditrina]

Ya'll still have plants? Mine look like green and brown ice lumps. Did someone let that jap snow eatin' machine loose in Kansas? There's lots of funky colored ice cubes, here. just. sayin.

[rob]

The company I used to work for had its corporate office in palm bay/melbourne area. They would come to ohio in the winter or spring dressed like eskimos. We would just laugh at them. I remember when i was a kid the neighbor next to my gradparents had a visit from some relation from alaska. It was like 40 degs out and the kids were running around in short sleeves. Probably felt warm to them.

[Thor]

I'm being told the windchill here is anywhere from -2 to -5. But I'm going to say it's -20, because according to Google, that's how cold it is in metric, and it sounds much more impressive. Also, I'm in Wisconsin, so people will believe me.

[AmerInParis]

"AmerinParis -- 5 degrees, eh? How much is that in me ... um ...
Posted by: O the U(manity) | 11:48 AM on January 3, 2008"

It's 42F. Brisk, if one grew up in the SouthWestern US, but I'm actually enjoying it. Clears the cobwebs from my brain.

[SippiFoxHntr]

Guys, you must remember that Southerners have very thin blood. It's 31 degrees here, and that's pretty chilly for central Mississippi. It actually SNOWS sometimes in north Mississippi (har har it's always snowing somewhere north of here) and wool is not in our vocabulary - It's like boobs on a boar.

The horses love it, though.

[SippiFoxHntr]

Guys, you must remember that Southerners have very thin blood. It's 31 degrees here, and that's pretty chilly for central Mississippi. It actually SNOWS sometimes in north Mississippi (har har it's always snowing somewhere north of here) and wool is not in our vocabulary - It's like boobs on a boar.

The horses love it, though.

[wickedwitch]

well Sippi, i learned something new today. i never knew that horses loved boobs on boars. how do they feel about tits on tomcats?

[snif]

Rob, what really cracks me up are the geniuses who, no matter how cold it gets down here (i.e., in the 30s), still walk around in t-shirts, shorts and flip flops like it's 80 degrees. It is, after all, Florida...

[Cheryl Howard]

snif, folks around these parts do the same thing. The highs will be in the 40's today, which is technically a heat wave.

[ArcticAl]

And for your weather report from Canada...

The temperature at home this morning was -8F with a windchill of -20F. It has now warmed up to a balmy 12F. Time to go sun tanning!

They were predicting a wind chill for a few northern parts of Canada (yes I live in the south!) of -69F last night. For your quick geography lesson, Canada stretches from further south than the northern border of California to the North Pole.

[Elon Weintraub]

AA, you still °F? But you're foreigners.

[ArcticAl]

I converted it to F so y'all would understand. Besides -69F sounds so much colder than -56C.

[O the U(manity)]

Tnx, Amer' ... I considered the formula of the McKenzie brothers, and it actually is quite nearly identical in its samenessocityism to your calculation ... Amazin' folks, them Canadians ... eh?

[SippiFoxHntr]

Wicked, they are pretty horney most of the time.
But I think I was probably referring to the weather.

[SippiFoxHntr]

I said horney. heh heh

[Kathybear]

18 degrees here in sunny NJ. But work and home feel like sub-tropics because, yes, I'm one of those women...

[queensbee]

bwaaahaaa, siouxie, oh, and WHAT about them mets, eh? O the U?? huh???

[Siouxie]

Al, it's also much sexier.

[Mr Death]

You guys have positive degrees?

We don't see those until April.

[wickedwitch]

thanks for setting me straight, Sippi. i was worried about interspecies genetics there for a minute.

[ArcticAl]

Yes it's sexier Siouxie, but a cold nose in the wrong place at those temperatures can give you an unwanted thrill.

[Siouxie]

Ah..yes. Not to mention unwanted shrinkage.

[Scott]

Reminds me of what my friend Kenny -- who happens to be African-American -- always said about us Northeast Ohio suburbanites: "The snow melts and white folks think it's summer." Which is true. It gets above 45 degrees around here and people wear shorts. We get really, really desperate by the time March or April roll around...

[Eleanor]

Well, we here in su.so.ca. feel the pain of the folk in Florida. We've had really, really cold weather too. When the so-called "high" is in the 50s, who's kidding who? or whom?

I had to put an extra blankie on the bed last night. It was in the low 40sF. We are not amused. And, like the people in FL, we don't have cold weather clothes.

[O the U(manity)]

Temperature in Nodak @ 1:47 pm MST (9:47 GMT) is 42 degrees Fahrenheit (5 degrees Celsius, same as Paris) ...

Merely sayin' ... it's (literally) T-shirt weather here in the Northern Great Plains (just a little bit south of the Great White North) ...

[MareBear]

Ohh, O the U: 42 degrees? Above zero? Over here in the Twin Cities our current temp is 24, but it's 20 here in the 'burbs. Yesterday we got all the way to 3. Sunday we might hit mid-30s, and, sadly, I'm looking forward to it. And this is coming from a Floridian transplant.

[PirateBoy]

Walter must be saying "No glove, no love!"

The Mountains of Southern Kalifornia are about to get pounded, folks. NWS has announced that up to *one foot* of rain can be expected to fall between now and Tuesday. Usually, this would be 'bad', but, considering the fact that our mountains were pretty much stripped bare a few months ago, things could quickly change to 'awful'.

And and did I forgot to mention that the winds are expected to peak at 74 mph?

Mrs. PirateBoy and I, while not near the danger zone, have prepared as best we can, stocking (not stalking) up on gas, pizza, wine, Doritos, and kitty-litter.

It could be a long weekend!

We need WxGirl here for the official un-official updates!

[Buford]

Up here in Ottawa (that's in Canada for the geography impaired), it has been -17C all day (around 1F) but it has been rather windy with a wind chill of -41C (about -42F).

Darn near made me crack out the parka (but I didn't). I'm still wearing a light fall jacket until it gets really cold.

[NotSoShyJan]

In NoCal, the predictions change every hour. But it's looking good for "my electricity was out".
Now it's two major storms, winds 21-28 mph, one to two inches of rain. I pin my hopes on the wind.

[Siouxie]

PB, don't forget the beer!!!!! stay safe!

[O the U(manity)]

MareBear -- OK ... now @ 5:15 it's down to 32 degrees ... been a perty nice day, actually ... s'posed to be in the 40s thru the weekend, I think I heard MB(RH?) say ... mebbe sum of this decent climate will werk its way down there for y'all by tomorrow ...

q'bee ... whenever I'm stuck fer sumthin' to say (which, I'll admit, doesn't happen very often -- not "good" or "witty" or "funny" ... merely another memory of the past) I'll hark back to the Amazin' year of 1969 ... I miss ol' Casey ...

[Moon]

Man up, weenies!

Hahahahaha! WEENIES!

[TNjen]

It was 8 degrees here in middle Tennessee this morning before it warmed up to a high of 25. That's pretty darn cold for here. But it's supposed to be almost 60 by Sunday. Weather here is just bizarre.

[Siouxie]

I, for one, am glad to know that Walter wears protection.

[xbalanke]

It's so cold here in Mass that my boogers were freezing in my nose today.