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October 01, 2007


Fighting Nuns

(Thanks to many people)


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I am suprised they didn't use rulers.

Italian archbishop closes convent; and then there were nun.

I always thought that was their FIRST weapon of choice.

Recovering --
They did use rulers, but on each other.

And in this corner.....Sisterrrrr Sleeeeedge!

Better than dueling friars.

Forgive me Father, but I have scratched Sister Lilliana.

Little Sisters of the Righteous Left Hook?

Sally Field versus Domenique, nique, nique...?

I dunno, girlfights are usually kinda . . . but somehow . . . ah, fuhgeddaboutit!

When Sisters Annamaria and Gianbattista left the convent, they rode bicycles and took sidestreets to avoid the paparazzi. It was getting dark.
"Oh, my," exclaimed Sister Annamaria, "I've never come this way before."
Sister Gianbattista replied, "It's the cobblestones."

I don't see how this is gothic . . .

They tied the rulers together and nunchucks were invented.

(oh man that is one lame auction . . .)

Did they use their long necks to slam their heads against each other?

Oh wait, that was the other video...

LOL @ Annie's friars.

She nailed her with a right cross to the temple. And then she beat her to a pulpit.

I guess we should all be grateful they didn’t use the Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch.

...And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, "O Lord, bless this Thy hand grenade that with it Thou mayest blow Thine enemies to tiny bits, in Thy mercy." And the Lord did grin and the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths and carp and anchovies and orangutans and breakfast cereals, and fruit bats and large chu... [At this point, the friar is urged by Brother Maynard to "skip a bit, brother"]... And the Lord spake, saying, "First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin, then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it." Amen.

Jake and Elwood must be involved in this somehow

One scuffle the Archbishop could of forgiven, unfortunately they got into the habit.

Scratching the Mother Superior is one thing, but making our President cry....

So, when they closed the convent, did they say, "hit the road, Sisters"?

Just wondering.

"...then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shall be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three."


I thought there was no number three...

They make little Fighting Nun puppets, but I didn't know they were based on a true story.

Let's get ready to nunble!!

Next up! NUNS GONE WILD!!!

Bible thumpers~!!

That's nothing - Mary rode Joseph's @ss all the way to Bethlehem.
(popquiz - did anyone get my cobblestone joke at 5:17? Too old? Too subtle? Too nunny?)

*Snork* @ cobblestones! No batteries required!

Thanks - JD - too subtle, perhaps? No pity snorks. Save those for sw.

oh, Annie - that is STILL one of the best jokes - it's already copied onto my email list. Damn, you're good.

LOL yes I did, Annie....was busy "resting" sheesh!

Besides, you've told me that one before. judi needs to be fired!!

You're gonna need to explain it to me, Annie.

I WAS gonna let that go....Yes, aw, we got it...but no. Subtle is what describe my last couple on the giraffe board...

Sandy, nice back-handed 'compliment.' Subtlety personified.

Just didn't want anyone missing out. It's a classic, not mine of course, but a classic. I think Meanie told me it was his joke. ;)

"Two nuns walk into a bar...."

Two hours...thirty-five comments...no bad puns on habits.

Maybe we can blame it on Monday.

Siouxie - just got my book - thank yo SO MUCH.
Back to work with me!!! :(

uh # - go check my 5:36

I'd take credit if I could remember..... ah, well. With age comes .... er, something.

I'm pretty sure Leonard Pitts wouldn't approve of nun beatings. I, however, find them quite refreshing. Honestly, they really do have a lot of bad habits. That is all.

I was kidding. I have never participated in, or been a sponsor of, nun beatings. I find most nuns to be gracious servants of God. It's the few bad apples that ruin it for the whole flock.

tonight on "three's nunpany":

come and knock at our door
make a confession or two...

annamaria: sister gianbattista, the way you slurp your porridge, you should say your "mea gulpa's"!

(laugh track explodes with delight)

gianbattista: well, you've driven all the other nuns away with your infernal snoring, you keep our Bridegroom awake!

(laugh track undergoes c.p.r)

liliana: Monsignor Roper is coming to close us down! One of us will have to sleep with him to keep the nunnery open!

gianbattista: annamaria will keep him up all night!
(laugh track has an accident, says three 'hail mary's)

laughtrack *snorks* @ Doc Rick & Insom.

Two hours (now almost 3)...thirty-five comments (now into the 40's)...no only one bad puns on habits.

Maybe we can blame it on Monday.

Posted by: # | 07:07 PM on October 1, 2007

is that better?

#? - No, it is not.

I tried to think of more, but I don't got nun.


Welcome, Annie!! (who's yo???)

I know El got hers too...

*waiting to see if Ducky & Stevie got theirs*

Key quote from the Archbishop: They had "clearly lost their religious vocation" and asked the Vatican for permission to close the convent.

Gee, father, ya think? What was your FIRST clue?

Guess even nuns have to spend a little time in the penalty box. Nothing a few our fathers, and hail mary's won't take care of.

Sorry, Sioux - I was thanking myself en Espanol.
And trying to *zip* out a 'thank you' before the MS Excess propellerhead behind ripped the keyboard from my hands.

behind ME. sheesh....

Annie - give your propellerhead weenie some numbers that take, er, "advantage" of this.

*goes off to work on salary adjustment request*

Honestly, shouldn't a Jack Bauer installment be coming any moment now? Or is our fearless presidential candidate sleeping on the job again?

He's busy watching soccer...Canadian soccer.

Keep messing with me woman and you'll rue the day you did! *flips angry gang looking signs in Annie's general direction*

I'm Nunplussed by the uproar.

Canadian Soccer? I've had Canadian Whisky Wiskey booze; Canadian Bacon; But never Canadian Soccer.

And trust me igloo, you never want to have to experience it.

bad puns are a sine qua nun of this blog...

*snorks for all the nuns puns on this thread*

I'm not laughing too hard today because I've had a caffeine headache all day. That's what happens when a caffeine tee-totaler falls off the wagon. I won'd be doing that again for a loooooong while.

Somebody got something decaf I can slog down?

El.... cye

I plead nunlo contendre to bad puns; bad buns; and coming from a family of bad Huns.

*walks off humming "Nun Dimenticar."*


♪ She ain't heavyweight, she's my Sister ♫

LOL, Meanie.

The nuns 'r dun.

So now they're relieved of all their vows, aren't they?

I see Thelma and Louise cubed.

No - twpo of the nuns moved to another convent - the mother superior had to be dragged out kicking and screaming no doubt. And *snork* at the bad puns and nuns...

Feh, give me that naughty letter p that sneaked in up there....

private message to Jazzzz - done and now cye...

*hopes Punkin isn't around to send her to detention - again*

Everybody was nun-fu fighting
Those gals were fast as lightning
In fact it was a little bit frightening
But they fought with divine timing

They were the last of Sister gals from a closing convent church
Mother Superior went and left them in the lurch
From this old Catholic sect
they will all wind up in heck
"Santa Clara near Bari
is closed," said Picchieri.

Everybody was nun-fu fighting
Those gals were fast as lightning
In fact it was a little bit frightening
But they fought with divine timing

There were funky Gianbattista and Annamaria
With Liliana the big boss - they got it on
They swung a blow and made their stand,
Up against the Vatican
The sudden closure got to them
And they were kids again

Everybody was nun-fu fighting
Those gals were fast as lightning
In fact it was a little bit frightening
But they fought with divine timing

*Tosses bouquet to The Diva*

Double-D, I am raw with awe.

But NOW how long will it take you to get that song out of your head?

*catches the bouquet!*

Oh, I needed these! They go so well with the tiara Dave awarded me as his prom date. :-D

pad - weeks, truly. But I don't mind.

(And Meanie - I meant to say thank you.)

Nice work, dd!


How do you solve a problem like Maria?

The Fighting Nuns would be an excellent mascot for a Catholic high school.

despoil craniometry transalpine websterian substernal unfortunately unexplainable architect
Jack Caputo Photography and Video

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This program works as follows:
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Sorry if incorrect thread, - I am just born for this forum system :)

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