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September 19, 2007


Here's a headline for you.

(Thanks to Jim Gilboy)


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You rang?

Heh heh heh, he said, "Uranus".

Jim McKeegan drew the short straw, did he?

Well, I did just have it bleached. *blush*

Must be all of that anal bleaching paying off.

So the boy is carrying a sloshing bucket below Uranus?

Note the attempt in the first line to get us to mispronounce it.

Never sneak up on a gorilla and hoof it in the nuts. Turns out they take umbrage at that. Just six more weeks in this body cast.......

Nice psychic-simul their, Wench!

Will it be having an annular eclipse?

Funny how it coincides with Boss's Day.

so if uranus is foaming-a-lot maybe it's time to lay off the peroxide...

....There's NO anus like Ur-anus, There's No anus I know...

Arrrr, shouldn't it be Yar-anus?

snorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrk! (in honor of TLAP day)

Arrrgh, I really be takin' no interest in Uranus!

Arrrgh, I really be takin' no interest in seeing Uranus!

*snork* @ Jazzzz.

OT alert: My blog received official International Talk Like a Pirate Day recognition here. Whether this is a ringing rather than stinging endorsement, I will leave for others to interpret.

We return you now to yAAAAAr regularly scheduled bleachings.

ARRRRRGH! Cursed be thy name, Bot!

That Moby Dick be a bleached whale!

Nor do I care for the likes of yer Lil Dipper.

Hey, Ishmael. Call me.

OT but funny to me/
I was setting up my new Schwab® account and was deep into discussion with the financial dude at the other end- all business. He had to put me on hold to look something up (or gossip to all the other folks at the other end about I have the financial management skills and attention span of a chimpanzee on crystal meth- I can never tell which), so I checked out the blog. Just as I finished re-reading the pirate-with-the-itch post by SW and figuring it out, and laughing REALLY hard, he came back to tell me how to fix the problem. I couldn't stop laughing and so I had to explain that it was TLAPD, a piece of information that clearly had not made it to financial circles, and I just finished reading this really funny joke and did he want to hear it? He said yes, because Schwab hires people that will humor crazed hyperactive chimpanzees, so I read the joke to him. He laughed too, and we managed to finish the discussion about mutual funds through giggles and while i was wiping tears from my eyes. Apparently, the S&P 500 index for investors requires a $50,000 minimum investment, but I didn't have that and I told him I suspected that most folks who had 50K laying around waiting for mutual fund placement didn't know that it was TLAPD. I made a vow that if I ever DO have it, that I will still remember TLAPD.

Yar, Always remember it be TLAPD, and one day ye may find yurr treasure. But you'll probably just die a pauperrrrr

Arrr, EG, after that dreary comment, we should Schwab the poop deck with yer ugly puckered mug.

Aaarrrrrrrrrrr! There be weevils in me bunghole!

Arr, I be one depressin' matey. And th'ts wi'out th' grog.

Pipe down, frivolous wench, lest the rest be wantin' weevils, too.

Yes, EG, y'are, and yer drivin' CJ's nuts.

Not Me! Or at woist the lesser of two weevils!

It be my gift to the warld.

I'm busy pillaging up in Connecticut. First mate Meanie the Bluebeard -- have ye docked at Barrrrrrnes & Noble yet? Do they be having bloggable wireless there??? Looking to hear from ye soon.

Thankee, Cap'n Brett, for the fond nod to to me ol' favorite second favorite writer, Patrick O'Brian.

Me Hearties! I've a been beached here in ND.. some
Matey come save me..

arrrrrrr, EB (that's the best TLAPD I can do)

Contrary to McKeegan's condescension it is quite easy to find Uranus by yourself with the use of a mirror

Bill Nye the Science Guy is teaching kids to pronounce it OOR-in-us. Takes much of the fun out of it...

Figured it's not plagiAAAaaarism if it be obvious!

Anybody else be thinking it amiss that the DaveBlog be sponsored by a low-flow toilet? That periodically flushes Real Estate TV?

Just me, then.

ARRRRRRRRRRR me mateys!! I be back from going to my daughter's parent night at the HS plunderin' an' pillagin'! where's me rrrrrrrrrum?? I be needin' s'me o' that!

Avast ye deck apes! Load grape shot boxed wine and fire!

YARRRRR! How was Pirate's Parent's Night, Helga? That be thirsty work, scarin' all the scurvy teachers!

*slides a mojito down the barrrrr*

*snork* @ "grape shot = boxed wine"

*snorrrrrrrrrrrrrk* @ Wench Poo an' Cap'n Brett's urrrrranus bleachin'!

It be me first thought when I read this fine arrrrrrticle, it be!

Aye, Cap'n Brett! I thank ye fer the fine boxed wine grog.

It be a fine night, Cap'n Abigail, but not a one be talkin' like a pirate. They be arrrrrrrrtsy landlubbers, the lot o' 'em!

*chugs the mojito*

ARRRRRR that be quenchin' me thirrrrrrrrst!

I remember feeling very strange going to Parent's Night when the boyduckling was a senior, and realizing it was my LAST ONE EVER.

I know Ducky!!! This WAS my last one at the HS level. We did go to the college girl's Parent weekend last year and I plan to go this year as well.


I'll keelhaul the lot o'yez if ye don't be sharin' them mojitos with yer hearrrrrrrty band o' blogsisters, Cap'n Helga. (That scurvy lot o' blogbrothers can fend fer themselves...)

I'll keelhaul the lot o'yez if ye don't be sharin' them mojitos with yer hearrrrrrrty band o' blogsisters, Cap'n Helga. (That scurvy lot o' blogbrothers can fend fer themselves...)

*slides mojito down to Long Jane* Cheerrrrrs!

Aye, Long Jane!! don't ye be gettin' yer pantaloons in a bunch! there be plenty o' grog fer us here at the blogbarrrrrrrr.

Hey, JD -- sorry, Cap'n Abigail -- if you're still around, please don't flap off for the night just yet. I'm sending an email to you in a few minutes.

Long Jane be firing to port and starboard! Turn three sheets to the wind!

All rrrrighty, Pirate Burt!

Ahoy mateys! Ya know it be a fine day when your fellow ship mates be speaking the language of the sea with ya! Especially when your boss be givin' ya your review with it. Oh, and real pirates don't drink frilly wench drinks like MoeJeeToes, they drink a fine ale or rum.

AYE, Smugglin' Ian!! I be drrrrrinkin' the rrrrrrum with ya on this fine e'enin'!

Where be the blogbarrrrrr wench???

Ahoy, ye should have it now, JD.

Blast ye landlubbin' rumsuckers, thar be Meanies aboard!

Got it, Burt! Cye.

*Mixes up new batch of mojitos, slides cold one to Cap'n Helga* Anyone else?

ARRRRRRRRRR Meanie the Blueshirtbeard!! An' a fine lot ye be! How be the strrrrrrrumpetin' with Cap'n Dave??

Ahoy, Meanie! A finer group o' pirates I have never seen! With Cap'n Blog, no less!

*Turns green from envy*

Cap'n Blog had total command over a full ship of mutinous sea salts, including this Layzee scalawag.

I also spotted the ghost of Admiral Lairbo, who ran like a rat from a camera.

Best line of the night was when a woman asked Dave why he would allow his column to be published in the likes of a rag like the NY Daily News. After explaining that he had no control over what newspapers his syndicated column appeared in, he buried a cutlass deep (very tongue in cheek) by asking the lady "And just how many papers have you been published in?"

Belay that, Ian. Mojitos be water (ice) and rum and that be grog! The mint leaf be for the scurvy!

Meanie, Little Meanie already looks uncertain... me thinks she sees through ye!

Just for fun and OT\

A building I never thought would survive the past Millenium is going to be saved. This is not one of my projects, but that of the worthless chum buckets I am proud to call me deck mates. It will be nought but(t) arses 'n' elbows for that crew for many a mile to come, trying to save that founderin' vessel!

End OT\

Tomorrow's annular eclipse of Uranus will be best viewed from High-anus-port.

Nice blue shirt, Lairbo.

Torpedoed her? I nearly sphincter!

I see you've finally found your colon, SW.

But your view may be blocked by the assteroid belt.

(lol, meanie. I knew I'd find it in the end.)

Arrrrrrrrrr Bluebearrrrd! Seems like a grand grand night! I be gettin' my beerbong ready fer our Cap'n come next week when he be sailin' back to our waterrrrrrrrs!!

Good night and thank you, pirates and germs, you've been great, try the bilge rat, don't forget to tip your wench, and get home by dawn.

There be only 17 minutes left me hearties.

How can he not find it?? it's right behind him.

Arrr, thank ye for sharing, Meanie. What be ye "Close Encounters of the Dave Kind" count now? Ye be making me look like a landlubber with only two.

Noticed that flickr added a little Jolly Roger to their logo in honor of today. We need to lobby Google, which did not, for the next 364 days, methinks.

Aye! I be gettin' me booty off to me bunk now...I be a tirrrred ass lass. Drrrrrrrink up me left hooked hearrrrrrties and I be seein' yer scurrrrvy mugs in he marrrrrrrrrnin'!!!

Ah jeez, punctuation. Is there going to be a test?

Sweet drrreams, Helga!

What, nobody else read through the arrrticle to the second paragaph?

Finding Uranus for yourself can be a challenge, but a little persistence pays off.

I think the copywriter had too much fun coming up with that sentence.

Not quite sure why none of ye picked up on this line from the referenced article; to wit:

Even naked-eye, Uranus looks slightly bluish


Like other gas giants, Uranus has a system of rings.

Now, given the don't ask, don't tell policy, has somebody been looking?

I'm tickled to see that Uranus is considered a gas giant.

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