24
In last week's episode, the cast of 24 ended up in New York City, where they ran into agents Mulder and Scully of The X-Files. They all spent the entire episode trying, without success, to get across town.
No, sorry, that's what always happens to me in New York. But the important thing is:Edgar is still dead.
We now turn you over to the Amazing Steve.
24 – Two Days Later – Hour 13
The following takes place between 7 am and 8 am
7:00 am – Jack, Chloe, Morris and Bill take a moment to survey their surroundings, squinting because of the bright sun and the wind blowing the desert sand around. There’s a canyon to their left and a road to their right. Jack says, “They’re trying to kill me.”
Morris says, “I would have thought that was obvious by now! They’re trying to kill all of us.”
Jack says, “That’s not what I meant. They were trying to kill me before now.”
Bill looks confused, “What do you mean, ‘before now’? That’s like saying, ‘I’m going to go down to the store yesterday.’ It doesn’t make any sense.”
Jack says, “Exactly! That’s exactly what I’m talking about!”
Chloe says, “Jack’s right. If they really have a temporal displacement unit, they could cause all kinds of havoc! I mean, just imagine if they could turn back time to before President Logan was in office!”
They all look at Chloe. After a moment, Bill says, “You say that like it was a bad thing…”
Chloe says, “You know what I mean. If they were able to go back in time, and eliminated Jack, just think of all the problems that would cause! Think of everything Jack has done since then!”
Jack says, “That doesn’t matter now. We have to stop them…” He stops and points, “Hey, What’s that?”
They turn and look. About twenty yards away, they see a mailbox by the side of the road.
Bill says, “A mailbox? What’s a mailbox doing out here? There’s nothing for miles!”
Jack says, “If there’s a mailbox, that means there’s a town nearby. Let’s keep going.” They continue to walk.
Something small zooms by them at high speed. They all turn to look, and don’t see anything but smoke and feathers.
Morris says, “What was THAT?” as a feather floats in front of his face.
7:05 am - Back at CTU, Fenster walks into Nadia’s office. He says, “I have important news. I have cell phone records.”
Nadia says, “Cell phone records? What are they?”
Fenster says, “They’re lists of numbers of people you’ve called when you use a cell phone, but that’s not important now. I used the records of the cell phone company to coordinate where Jack has been in the last twelve hours. The company records the GPS signal that all CTU issue telephones give out, and I was able to find out where Jack is.”
Nadia thinks for a moment and says, “Uh… don’t get me wrong here, but don’t you think that would be a HUGE security hole? I mean, what if a terrorist figured out how to break into the cell phone company’s records? They could track all our agents! We have to have better security than that!”
Fenster says, “That decision was probably made by the same people who hired the security guards back when Edgar and Lynn died, and who designed the building that kept everything secure…except the sewers!”
Nadia says, “Good point. I’ll have to cancel that option in the cell phone contract for all operatives.”
Fenster says, “Yeah, good luck with that…”
Nadia says, “What were you saying about the cell phone’s GPS coordinates?”
7:07 am - Fenster looks down at the papers he’s holding. “I looked up the last coordinates, and they were in the Abandoned Warehouse District.”
Nadia says, “I want you to go down there personally, and check it out.”
Fenster’s voice goes up an octave, “ME? Why ME?”
Nadia says, “We need someone down there right away. I would send Jack, but he’s gone… I’ll send some backup.”
Commercial
7:12 am – The group continues down the road. Chloe says, “So far, the terrorists have been in every place we’ve been. Where are they now? There’s nothing but desert out here.”
Jack puts his hand above his eyes, shading them. He points and says, “They could be in the hills over there.” He points in a different direction, “Or they might be in the caves over there.” He puts his hand back down.
Morris says, “They could be in town. There’s no good way of telling.”
Bill says, “Hey! Quiet a minute! What’s that noise?”
They stop talking. There’s a rumble, but it’s hard to tell where it’s coming from. They look in the direction they came from, and see a man in a fur coat standing beside the mailbox that’s now about a quarter mile behind them. A large delivery truck has pulled up to the mailbox. Jack starts to run back to the mailbox, and the others follow. The driver hands the man a package and drives off back in the direction he came from. The man runs to the edge of the canyon and climbs down over the edge.
7:15 am - Jack reaches the edge of the canyon, and looks down to see a small path leading to a series of caves. The others catch up. Jack says, “They must be using that mailbox as a drop point. I’m surprised they didn’t see us.” He starts to climb down the path.
Chloe says, “Jack! What are you doing?”
Jack continues to climb down, “I’m going to check it out. You stay up here.”
Bill says, “I’m not staying up here where there’s no place to hide. I’m coming with you!” Morris and Chloe agree.
Jack says, “Then follow me, and be quiet.”
7:17 am – Fenster slowly drives through the entrance of the abandoned warehouse, with the security fence (that’s not as secure as it used to be) wide open. Fenster notices a business card in the fence. It says, “Ernie’s Fence Repair. Have an ‘abandoned’ warehouse with a fence that needs mending? Call Ernie! 555-4357”.
Fenster talks into a handheld radio, “This is Agent Zoom. I’ve arrived at the destination.”
Nadia’s voice comes from the radio, “Who?”
Fenster says, “Agent Zoom”
Nadia says, “Argent Dawn? What is this, World of Warcraft?”
Fenster repeats, “Zoom! Agent Zoom! You know, like ‘Zoom, Box 350, Boston, Mass, 02134?’ Zoom!”
Nadia says, “Fenster? Is that you?”
Fenster says, “YES! Just call me Agent Zoom! I’m undercover!”
Nadia says, “You’re not undercover! If you were undercover we’d have people guarding you in case you got into trouble and…oops.”
Fenster looks alarmed, “You mean I don’t have backup?”
Nadia says, “Look, we’re short-handed, you know that….Just tell me what you see and get out of there.”
Commercial
7:26 am – Jack and Bill are all the way at the bottom of the pathway and are standing on a ledge that’s about 30 feet down from the edge of the canyon. Morris is with Chloe also helping her navigate the narrow path. Jack points at a series of caves on his left, motions everyone to go in that direction, and says, “Be careful on this ledge.” He points at the edge of the ledge, “The canyon goes down a lot farther than this, and we don’t want anyone going over the edge here.”
7:27 am – The group reaches the caves and Jack tells the rest of the group to look around the entrances for signs of where the man might have gone. They don’t see anything at first. Jack is just about to enter a cave when Chloe calls him over. “Jack! I think I found some tracks!”
Jack rushes over to her. “Tracks? Where?”
Chloe looks alarmed, “You’re standing on them!” Jack looks down, confused. Where he expected to see footprints, he sees railroad tracks leading to the ledge’s edge into the canyon. They hear the “BEEP! BEEP!” of a car horn from across the canyon. Everyone turns to looks, but can’t see anything but some kind of bird on the other side of the canyon.
7:33 am - Suddenly, a loud roaring noise comes from somewhere inside the cave. The noise gets louder and something comes zooming out of the cave. The man with the fur coat comes zooming out of the cave. He’s wearing roller skates which he’s using on the tracks, and he has a HUGE rocket strapped to his back. Before Jack can react, the man hits Jack, knocking him off balance. The man grabs Jack and they both continue hurdle down the tracks, off the edge, and continue in mid-air above the canyon. They get almost to the other side of the canyon when the rocket loses all power. Jack, the man, and the rocket just hang in mid-air.
Jack laughs and yells, “Hey, why aren’t we falling?” At that exact moment, gravity, which was ignoring them until it realized it was slacking at its regular job, kicks in. Jack screams. He grabs the man by the collar, and realizes the man isn’t wearing a fur coat. In fact, it’s not even a man! It’s a coyote! Now he’s really screaming. Chloe, Bill and Morris all watch helplessly as Jack, the rocket and the coyote fall to the canyon floor below them.
The rocket, which thankfully had gone out, decides at that moment to start up again, speeding their decent to the floor. They hit the ground and there’s a loud explosion. Chloe screams, “JACK!!!” They can’t see anything but smoke rising up from below.
Commercial
7:37 am – Bill watches over the edge as Morris tries to comfort Chloe, who still in tears. He says, “There’s nothing you could have done. It was all too quick.”
Chloe snaps at him. “I shouldn’t have called him over! If I hadn’t have called him over, he wouldn’t have been on those tracks! It’s my fault! He…”
Bill interrupts, “There’s something moving down there!” Morris and Chloe rush to the edge, and look down.
7:38 am – Below them, the smoke starts to clear revealing clear outlines of coyote and Jack Bauer-shaped craters in the canyon floor. One hand comes out of Jack’s crater, followed by the other. Jack pulls himself out of the crater, still somewhat groggy. Suddenly, the coyote pops its head out of its hole, looks around, jumps out, and runs off. Jack looks up and hears Chloe, Morris and Bill all yelling his name. Jack stands up, sways a bit, heads for the cliff and starts climbing. A rope from above drops down next to Jack, and he grabs it. Bill and Morris pull Jack up the cliff.
7:41 am – Jack barely reaches the top of the cliff when Chloe grabs him and gives him a big hug. Then she smacks him in the face, “Don’t you EVER do that again, Jack Bauer!”
Jack says, “OK! OK! It’s not like I planned that!”
Bill asks, “How did you survive that? Was that a coyote that grabbed you?”
Jack admits, “I have no idea how I survived. Yes, I think it was a coyote.” He shakes his head. “This place is crazy.”
Jack looks along the track he was standing on before, and asks, “Did you look in there? What is that?”
Chloe says, “That’s a cave, Jack.”
They hear machine guns firing, and bullets are raining down from somewhere across the canyon.
Bill yells, “Run for it!”
More gunshots go off, and they all run into the cave.
7:44 am – Jack tries to see who’s shooting at them. He says, “Keep down! There are a bunch of men across the canyon from us. See if you can find anything in here we can use!”
As their eyes adjust, they begin to see what’s in the cave. There are many crates all around the place. Bill says, “Look at this label: it says ‘ACME Flame Thrower – Fastest BBQ In The Neighborhood”, and this one says ‘ACME Rocket – Never Be Late For Work!’ and ‘ACME Batman Suit – Guaranteed to almost always fly’”.
Jack says, “Is there anything in there we can use?”
Bill responds, “No, it doesn’t look like it… Wait.” He picks up something on the floor and says, “There’s a small rocket here, and a pair of roller skates…”
Chloe interrupts, “Jack! Get over here and look at this!”
Jack looks at the catalog Chloe is holding. The cover says: ACME Company – Instant Delivery.
Jack says, “What good is a catalog?”
Chloe says, “Didn’t you see the cover? It says ‘Instant Delivery – Just fill out this card, drop it into an ACME mailbox, and we’ll deliver promptly!’ Order something and we’ll have it delivered!”
Jack says, “I think you’re right. We’re going to need to embrace the weirdness if we’re going to get out of here.”
Jack picks up the catalog and starts leafing through it. “One thousand pound anvil… No… Shoe springs… No… Ah! Here we go! Someone give me a pen!”
Morris says, “How are you going to get past the men? They’ll kill you as soon as they see you!”
Jack says, “You leave that to me! We better hope these are the least observant terrorists ever, or this is never going to work.”
Commercial
7:51 am – Fenster moves carefully through the warehouse, he finally comes across the room that Jack, Chloe, Bill and Morris were in before they disappeared. The computers are still running, and the archway which the group went through is covered with mist. The television above the archway appears to be showing a western. Fenster calls Nadia, “I think I found something…You better get some people down here right away.”
7:52 am – The men with the machine guns wait outside for some sign of movement from the cave. Suddenly, they hear a loud noise and a large object come barreling out of the cave. It’s one of the cartons, mounted on roller skates with a rocket attached to the top. The men all focus their firepower on the large object as it rapidly heads for the edge of the canyon and off into the air.
While this is happening, Jack scrambles out of the cave and quickly climbs up the pathway to the top edge of the canyon. He runs to the mailbox at the edge of the road, throws the card into the mailbox, and waits. He looks around and sees a large cloud of smoke on the horizon. It’s a delivery truck!
7:54 am – The delivery truck stops in front of the mailbox. The driver hands Jack a large package and drives off. Jack opens up the package and says, “This will do nicely!”
7:56 am – Chloe looks out from the cave and says, “Well, those guys sure killed that empty box. I hope what Jack is trying is going to work.”
7:57 am – The terrorists look down at the crate at the bottom of the canyon and decide that the box is definitely not going to be going anywhere. They start shooting at the entrance of the cave again. Someone starts yelling from the other side of the canyon. They look up. It’s Jack, and he’s holding an ACME Missile Launcher!
7:58 am – Jack fires a missile from the launcher straight at the men. There’s a loud explosion, and the men fall down into the canyon. Jack moves to the edge of the canyon. He looks down, and sees that the men are already getting up and running for cover. Jack says, “What kind of looney tunes place is this?”
7:59 am – There’s a bright flash. Jack, Chloe, Bill and Morris are standing in a hallway in front of a phone booth.
8:00 am - Time's up!
Posted by: Steve (The 24 Guy) | August 20, 2007 at 09:01 PM
*Opens little umbrella in appreciation.*
*Falls like a rock.*
Posted by: fivver | August 20, 2007 at 09:14 PM
Yikes!, Steve.
Alright! I'm knowing where this is going next .... and loving it!
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | August 20, 2007 at 09:20 PM
The only thing that would have made this episode better is if last season's writers had wandered into the scene just in time to get hit by a falling chunk of the cliff....hehe! Excellent job as always Steve.
Posted by: Doc Rick | August 20, 2007 at 09:27 PM
Thank you, Steve.
Posted by: daisymae | August 20, 2007 at 09:40 PM
Just damn, Steve. "Hallway in front of a phonebooth"...hmmm, Superman? I'm stumped (just like that motorcycle guy that didn't notice his missing leg).
Posted by: SandyEgo | August 20, 2007 at 09:50 PM
Yay for steve!
Posted by: crossgirl | August 20, 2007 at 10:00 PM
This does sound like a job for... What happened to Clark Kent anyway?
Posted by: Kathybear | August 20, 2007 at 10:14 PM
If I had to guess, I would say that sounds like 'Get Smart'.
Posted by: Chronus | August 20, 2007 at 10:25 PM
*beep* *beep* yeah!
Awesome, Steve!!!
Posted by: Siouxie | August 20, 2007 at 10:38 PM
I'm rooting for Superman! Although "Get Smart" would be just as cool!
Posted by: Siouxie | August 20, 2007 at 10:41 PM
My money's on Dr. Who...but then again, I don't have any money. Great show Steve!
Posted by: Noob | August 20, 2007 at 10:47 PM
It HAS to be "Get Smart". That's how agent 86 always got into Control. He went into the phone booth and dialed a number and the floor of the phone booth dropped.
Posted by: rob | August 20, 2007 at 10:49 PM
Would you believe ...I always wanted to be Agent 99?
Posted by: Siouxie | August 20, 2007 at 10:57 PM
Bill & Ted?
Posted by: OtheU(manity) | August 20, 2007 at 11:01 PM
Siouxie, I would believe that. You probably also wanted to be Jeannie, too, right? Ooh! Maybe they'll end up in I Dream of Jeannie!
Posted by: ScottMGS | August 20, 2007 at 11:13 PM
Mmmmmmm ..... Agent 99 ....
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | August 20, 2007 at 11:14 PM
You've been waiting for years for an excuse to use that line on The Blog, haven't you, Steve?
Great job, as always. My vote for next week's episode is "Get Smart," too. I can't wait for Jack to try out the Shoe Phone...
Posted by: Wes S. | August 20, 2007 at 11:20 PM
*snork* Meanie!
Scott, I did want to be Jeannie!! and Samantha...actually I loved Jeannie's bad sister and Serena (the bad witch)
Posted by: Siouxie | August 20, 2007 at 11:21 PM
*blinks & twitches nose*
Goodnight folks!! sweet dreams ;-)
Posted by: Siouxie | August 20, 2007 at 11:23 PM
Hah! Yes, the bad sisters in those shows tended to be a bit cuter (or at least
more wanton (not won ton) lookingsexier).Posted by: ScottMGS | August 20, 2007 at 11:28 PM
Florida'sOur New National Logo:Embrace the weirdness if we're going to get out of here.
Bwahahahaha. You're a genius, Steve.
Posted by: Meditrina | August 20, 2007 at 11:38 PM
Sweet dreams, Jeannie or was that Samiouxie. ;-)
Posted by: Meditrina | August 20, 2007 at 11:42 PM
Sweep
Posted by: ScottMGS | August 20, 2007 at 11:46 PM
Yay, Steve! You're definitely the one!
Posted by: Just Ducky | August 20, 2007 at 11:47 PM
Uh, scuse me, Scott, but there was no demon dwarf vacuum action needed on my post. Nice try. ;-P
Posted by: Meditrina | August 20, 2007 at 11:49 PM
Just embrace the weirdness. I love it. It may be my new personal mantra.
DB4P08.... yes, of the United Weirdness.
Posted by: Meditrina | August 20, 2007 at 11:50 PM
Hi Med. So your browser doesn't show my "Sw" in bold and "eep" in plain font? Mine does - and I fixed it!
Posted by: ScottMGS | August 20, 2007 at 11:53 PM
Med, I'll have some of whatever you're drinking. ;-)
Posted by: Just Ducky | August 20, 2007 at 11:53 PM
I am on my second glass of fine box wine, ala Sioux.
My revelry is mostly that I just had a 45 minute confab with the X and I pretty much called him out on the BS and told him to grow up and be the parent.
Oh yeah, and I told him I hate his friends and have for 20 years. The truth will set you free..... ;-)
Posted by: Meditrina | August 21, 2007 at 12:01 AM
Hey, Med, you srill around?
Posted by: baligurl | August 21, 2007 at 12:14 AM
^5, Med! You deserve the finest box wine for that conversation. The truth (or a good set of lockpicks) will indeed set you free.
There are so many Peter Pans out there. I had one once, myself. Moved on, thank goodness.
Enjoy your wine. I'm flapping off to bed--have to take Mom on the other side of town for a medical procedure in the morning. We hope it will help her continual back pain.
Nighty-night! Sweet dreams!
Posted by: Just Ducky | August 21, 2007 at 12:14 AM
Yeah, bali, i'm swill here. tehehehe. Does it make me a dork that i quack myself up?
Don't answer that.
Posted by: Meditrina | August 21, 2007 at 12:16 AM
Toss me a little o'whut yer drinkin', then. I'm hangin' out as well! (Silly Waitstaff, dorks is for um...lost my train o'thought...)
Posted by: baligurl | August 21, 2007 at 12:20 AM
Oh, and Ducky, very nicely phrased. I use the Peter Pan euphemism (sp?) regularly. As a matter of fact, Pan is in my cell phone (as a moniker). Let me know if we should send tinkerbell over with some pixie dust. (Strictly Metaphoric, as Pan is one of the straightest laced 10 year olds in an nearly 40 year old body that I know.)
Posted by: Meditrina | August 21, 2007 at 12:21 AM
My very first thought was Get Smart. I hope so! KAOS here we come!!
Posted by: DeskDiva | August 21, 2007 at 12:22 AM
Just messin' witcha, Med!
Posted by: baligurl | August 21, 2007 at 12:29 AM
Hey, Med, bali! How're you ladies this evening? Wish I could join you in a glass of wine, but we wouldn't all fit. ;-)
Posted by: DeskDiva | August 21, 2007 at 12:31 AM
Hey Diva! I'll suck in! I'm having tequila anyway, that doesn't take up much room. Wait...the glass is smaller. *SHOT* There, I'll just sit here on the side of the pool.
Posted by: baligurl | August 21, 2007 at 12:36 AM
Wish I could take a dip, but I hafta hit the hay. School mornings come early and there's hair to fix, a hot meal (I insist!) to cook, assignment notebook to check, and the road construction..... oh, the road construction..... a 25 minute commute wasn't enough. We have to close the on-ramp and add 5 - 10 minutes on the way to school. Wouldn't bother me as much if it were on the way home, but every minute counts when you're in middle school. Allegedly.
Sweet dreams, everyone. And God Bless Us All, as Tiny Tim would say.
Posted by: Meditrina | August 21, 2007 at 12:42 AM
Nighty-night. I just have one left in school, and I make her hair look FAR too normal.
Posted by: baligurl | August 21, 2007 at 12:45 AM
Oh, that commute is one way. And my life sucks. Yes, indeedy.
And bali, cye.
Okay, does anyone else see cover your ears or close your eyes? Just wondering.
Hear no evil.
See no evil.
Speak no evil.
First two covered in cye. Third one is a gimme.
Posted by: Meditrina | August 21, 2007 at 12:52 AM
Icme'd, all good. On the other hand, I love monkeys! In Coz I had a great drink called a "cheeky monkey". Best beach drink ever! Equal parts vodka, kalua, cream and banana. Add ice and blend to slushy perfection: YUM!
Posted by: baligurl | August 21, 2007 at 01:00 AM
In my world, we go a lot with cya, which does NOT stand for "check your ... ". And just never mind, thank you, any discussion of the evil that lurks there.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | August 21, 2007 at 08:19 AM
Since Meanie didn't even bring a box of danish, I'll set out breakfast sandwhiches, donuts, and the giant blog-o-matic coffee maker.
*sets empty coffee can on counter hoping for blog-dollar donations to cover the cost of breakfasts*
Posted by: Punkin Poo | August 21, 2007 at 08:37 AM
Weww, [mmmmph], you fee, I forta fimmiffed off the box...... [guzzles last drop of coffee] ...[ahhhh] and I had to wash it all down too.....
Mmmmm ... is that a croissant?
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | August 21, 2007 at 08:46 AM
OMG! hollywoodreporter.com is reporting that Janeane Garofalo will be on 24 this season.
Posted by: Dr. Bob | August 21, 2007 at 08:59 AM
Fine, just so long as it isn't ... him, Al Franken.
Posted by: Steve Haller | August 21, 2007 at 09:14 AM
Mornin!
*drops $10 blog dollars into coffee can*
*grabs sammich*
Posted by: Siouxie | August 21, 2007 at 09:22 AM
Oo they should be on Monk!
or Hogans Heroes
Posted by: finasimpson | August 21, 2007 at 09:33 AM
Another fabulous episode, Steve! Can't wait 'til next week!
Posted by: Tori Lennox | August 21, 2007 at 01:10 PM