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August 29, 2007

ATTENTION, PARENTS WHO ARE SENDING THEIR CHILDREN OFF TO COLLEGE, AND BELIEVE THAT WHEN THEY GRADUATE, THEY WILL GO OFF AND MAKE THEIR OWN WAY IN THE WORLD

Heed the lesson of Bobby the Bobtailed Raccoon.

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Heed the lesson of the writer of this article. Stay in school. Learn about sentence structure. Learn how not to bore people. Don't use monotonous sentences. Make things interesting. Or you will end up like Bobby - your butt hacked off, yet you keep coming back for more.

I know some people like this.

You try to get rid of them, but they keep coming back.

Davie Crocket would have known what to do.

Is it just me, or did this article read like a Dr. Seuss book?

Annie, I agree.

But you forgot one important item.

Triple space.

Yes, really.

I think I'll stop writing now.

The End.

See Bobby run.

Chop Bobby's tail off.

See Bobby come back for more.

See Bobby run from Senator Craig.

Run, Bobby, run!

This would've been a funny looking coonskin hat, DPC. The tail was gone.

We had a family of opussums living under our house. Every night we would trap another one and my husband would drop it off down by the creek on his way to work. Finally I told him to spray paint their butts so we could see if they were just coming back. They weren't...we trapped 11 of them in 2 weeks time.

We also trapped a skunk once. Man was he pissed off!

That made me laugh.

when i (finally) left home, my parental units changed the locks on the doors and repainted the house, i still found it though...

AuntieM - it's just you. Yet we feel the same way.

To add to insom's experience, when I (finally) left home, my p's moved. But they gave me their new address. Now, just like Bobby, I keep coming back. Parents are such suckers.

BTW

Did anyone know about the foot tapping thing. I am worried I have been sending out mixed messages when my leg falls asleep on the john.

I have long advocated a federal-witness-protection-style program for parents: When your child leaves for his or her senior year at college, you enter the program, and when the child attempts to return home, home, and you, are... gone.

oops wrong story

Recovering - define 'john.'

Dave - where can I sign up for the Federal Parent Protection Program (FP³)?

Dave, can Cubans enter this program?? As you well know, it's not part of our culture to actually leave home.

Annie- Ok. As long as it's just me. And everyone. I think I'll spray paint my sister's butt to see if she keeps returning home.

My nephew is out tackling the world armed with a new Bachelors Degree in History. My sister isn't renting his room. Sad thing is he's turned down two amazing offers that could have set him up big time.

I tell ya, when I was a kid, my parents moved all the time... but I always found 'em.
I could tell my parents hated me. My bath toys were a toaster and a radio.
A girl phoned me the other day and said... Come on over, there's nobody home. I went over. Nobody was home.

I was lost and asked a cop to help me find my parents and asked "do you think we'll find them", he said, "I don't know there's so many places to hide".

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