THOSE BASTARDS
So I went to this site and plugged in my blog address to see what my rating is, and this is what I got:
The explanation was:
This rating was determined based on the presence of the following words:
bastards (1x)
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So I went to this site and plugged in my blog address to see what my rating is, and this is what I got:
The explanation was:
This rating was determined based on the presence of the following words:
bastards (1x)
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bastards?!! that's the best they can come up with? obviously they don't read the comments attached to your blog.
Posted by: crossgirl | June 29, 2007 at 01:13 PM
sheesh...and here I thought mary was picky!!
*BASTARDS* *BASTARDS* *BASTARDS*
heh!
Posted by: Siouxie | June 29, 2007 at 01:15 PM
Oh, please. It ain't the words, it's how you say them!
*spoken as she strips off her T-shirt to the bikini underneath*
Posted by: DeskDiva | June 29, 2007 at 01:20 PM
"bastards (1x)"
I am suprised by the count. Those squirrel bastards are constantly making the blog.
Posted by: Laurie | June 29, 2007 at 01:20 PM
DANGIT! My myspace is rated G! I'm gonna have to work on that. I have a reputation to uphold!
Posted by: DeskDiva | June 29, 2007 at 01:21 PM
at least we rated a creepy green color.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | June 29, 2007 at 01:24 PM
Kinda what I think of as "poison" green, Annie. I LIKE it!
Posted by: DeskDiva | June 29, 2007 at 01:27 PM
MySpace is also rated G for THIS reason:
This rating was determined based on the presence of the following words:
* steal (1x)
I guess I'll have to UP the cuss words.
Posted by: Siouxie | June 29, 2007 at 01:28 PM
What a Very Odd Coincidence!
Just this morning I found that same site and ran The Crinkle Bank through its rate-hole only to discover that, sadly, we've earned the dreaded NC-17. I suspect a preponderance of "retards" is to blame (25x), though dead (7x), hell (4x), orifice (3x) and sex (1x) were also ranked (but to be fair, all of those appeared in the same sentence). If there were any other word to describe Big and Small Retard Dogs I would doff my cap to the good folks at Mingle and vie for that coveted PG-13 rating, the Gold Standard for the sort of comedy I try to deliver in the half hour or so a day I'm not completely bombed out of my skull. But sadly, no other adjective will do and so I must live with my NC-17, the favorite rating of films having something to do with donkeys and people with astoundingly relaxed gag reflexes.
*sigh*
Posted by: Wender J. Crinklebank | June 29, 2007 at 01:35 PM
Ah, Wender. Good morning to you, too!
Posted by: DeskDiva | June 29, 2007 at 01:38 PM
WJC.....Sh!t!! That Was F@ckin' funny!!
Posted by: Jazzzz | June 29, 2007 at 01:39 PM
*waves wildly*
HI there, Jazzzzy!!!!
Posted by: DeskDiva | June 29, 2007 at 01:41 PM
Wender, can I borrow a couple of your retards and an orifice? That'll
shirleysurely spice up my Myspace.Posted by: Siouxie | June 29, 2007 at 01:41 PM
Jazzzz's comments have been rated "R" for extremely foul language curiously redacted via use of Clever Punctuation That Would Surely Fool Young People or Stray Nuns That Might Otherwise Be Offended by Profanity.
This comment is rated "PG" because of the following: "Crapweasel."
Posted by: Wender J. Crinklebank | June 29, 2007 at 01:43 PM
Crapweasel - I dated him. Well, we dated for one night. *EG*
Posted by: Meditrina | June 29, 2007 at 01:50 PM
Musta been one heck of a good weasel, Med ;-P
Posted by: Siouxie | June 29, 2007 at 01:53 PM
Wasn't NC-17 the ship number of the Enterprise (the Star Ship Enterprise, that is)
Posted by: pogo | June 29, 2007 at 01:53 PM
Hey Diva ;-)............... Gouardammit, yer killin' me WJC...I am sleep deprived (depraved?), though
Posted by: Jazzzz | June 29, 2007 at 01:53 PM
What a bunch of [euphemism]s!! Can't these [eptithet]s tell an adult-oriented blog from a [primitivism]ing regular blog!!! [Major religious figure]!!!!
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | June 29, 2007 at 01:54 PM
*SNORK* and a [opposite of heaven] YEAH! Meanie!!!
Posted by: Siouxie | June 29, 2007 at 01:57 PM
Let's see what my "met cute" story does to the site's rating.
When I first met mrs. padraig, we were using an antiquated mail system based on Wang computers.
*sound of geezer bus in distance*
I was the support staff called upon to assist the future mrs. p. when her mail system failed. So it is said that when we met I straightened out her Wang and she's been returning the favor ever since.
Posted by: padraig | June 29, 2007 at 01:59 PM
heh -- I said "support staff"
Posted by: padraig | June 29, 2007 at 02:00 PM
They've now added dead (1x) to the list of reasons. I am trying to figure out that reasoning. Dead can't be G? Man, the zombies of the world are not gonna be happy about that. Those dead bastards!
Posted by: ShadowKatmandu | June 29, 2007 at 02:02 PM
lol pad!
hopefully no more hardware failures??
Posted by: Siouxie | June 29, 2007 at 02:02 PM
I prefer bustards
Posted by: sthnbelle | June 29, 2007 at 02:10 PM
Hardware's fine on my end, Siouxie. My discs are hard as ever. Not to brag, but mrs. p's firmware is pretty darn impressive, too.
Posted by: padraig | June 29, 2007 at 02:10 PM
Oh for fuck's sake! My blog was rated G!
"This rating was determined based on the presence of the following words:
* xxx (1x)"
Posted by: wiredog | June 29, 2007 at 02:17 PM
Uh-oh!
wiredog said a bad word.
uh-oh.
Posted by: Eleanor | June 29, 2007 at 02:23 PM
Well, I swear like a sailor on mine, and yet they gave me a G rating! WTF?
Posted by: Bethie | June 29, 2007 at 02:24 PM
Even in my blog titles I swear, and yet your children are welcome to come get a look see!
Posted by: Bethie | June 29, 2007 at 02:35 PM
Bethie, you should hear the rap records that have been "edited for radio." I listened to a couple and had to ask, "What exactly did they take OUT?"
*geezer bus zooms off into distance at a blazing 45 rpm*
Posted by: padraig | June 29, 2007 at 02:36 PM
Ha Dave, I also have "bastards (1x)", and yet my blog is only rated G. I'm going to send it to every six-year old I know, and they can't come to your blog. Neener Neener,
Posted by: Edgar Greenberg | June 29, 2007 at 03:05 PM
Yeah, exactly padraig, I hear ya. If I hear one more "Hey ho, get yo booty ova here!" I'll vomit. I want to get paid to think up Hip Hop video ideas though. "Hmmm...how 'bout some scantily clad ho's dancing suggestively around guys wearing a lot of bling? Great! Send me the check!"
Posted by: Bethie | June 29, 2007 at 03:06 PM
pogo, NC-17 is the rating given to the Captain Kirk and green alien women special edition. Bet you've never seen a phaser used like that before.
Posted by: The blog reader formerly known as Matt | June 29, 2007 at 03:13 PM
Wow. I got a worse rating than here?! That'll teach me to talk about bombs, guns, and dead people.
Posted by: Tori Lennox | June 29, 2007 at 03:17 PM
Bethie, you should hear the rap records that have been "edited for radio." I listened to a couple and had to ask, "What exactly did they take OUT?"
According to my brother, "You don't want to know. You don't want to know."
Posted by: Edgar Greenberg | June 29, 2007 at 03:17 PM
I married the best weasel in existance.
Posted by: Mad Scientist Weasel | June 29, 2007 at 03:17 PM
I'm rated PG for the following words: hell (2x) and dangerous (1x). "Dangerous"? What the hell?
Posted by: Owen Tew | June 29, 2007 at 04:04 PM
Hey Dave,
It's a cheap program that rates words. Throw some porn up there and you'll still get the same ratings so long as you don't say anything about it...
No seriously, throw some free porn up there.
Posted by: AB | June 29, 2007 at 04:18 PM
so the blong got a PG rating, BFD. I know longs twice as sweary with only half the ratings as two of these web things combined.
Posted by: chad | June 29, 2007 at 04:52 PM
When checking my blog, I discovered that "gun" is a bad word.
I got an R rating. Weird stuff.
Posted by: Alfred | June 29, 2007 at 05:17 PM
My site gets an "R", in part for featuring the word "poop" (1x) which, besides being something I don't remember ever using and can't actually find anywhere on the site, hardly seems unfit for those under 17. God only knows what they'd think of "booger."
Posted by: Lairbo | June 29, 2007 at 05:53 PM
If Dave's site is going to be rated PG for a "b" word, I would have expected it to be BOOGER!
Posted by: DavCat | June 29, 2007 at 06:28 PM
I wonder what the Mel Gibson version of "Jew Narc, Jew Narc" on my blog would rate.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | June 29, 2007 at 07:59 PM
... um ... not wantin' to be a contributory postin' person to increased Bad Ratings, I'll refrain from the first 20 or 30 thots I had about them ...
I'll merely say, HI,
Mad"Quite Angry" ... good to see you around here ...Posted by: OtheU(manity) | June 29, 2007 at 10:15 PM
If you paste in the URL for this particular thread, it gets an "NC-17":
bastards (11x) dead (5x) hell (3x) porn (2x) poop (1x)
Naughty, naughty.
Posted by: Spiny Norman | June 29, 2007 at 10:36 PM
I have 3 files in my toolbox. One is a crosscut file and the other two are bastards.
Bastards!
Posted by: catman | June 30, 2007 at 09:38 PM