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June 13, 2007

JUST A REGULAR GUY

(Thanks to DavCat)

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finally, something young men can aspire to!

Gives new meaning to The Masters.

So that's Tiger's secret..... RIP a really loud one as his opponent is teeing off and disrupt his concentration.

faaaaaaaaaaaaart forrrrrrrrrrrre

Now there is what I call the Sportsman of the Century™.

Also gives new meaning to the golf phrase "Grip it and Rip it!" needless to say.

That's why Tiger always makes the cut.

"After sex I really have the urge to light one up." - Steve Martin

"EXCUSE ME!" - also Steve Martin

I'm putting
And right in the middle of the Masters
Then all at once I tense up
From something that keeps knocking at my brain
Before I go insane
I hold my hands to my ass
And spring up from the grass
Screaming out the words you dread ....
"I think I farted!"; (I think I farted)

This morning, I woke up with this feeling
I knew just how to deal with
And so I just decided in myself
I'd hide it in myself
And never talk about it
And did not go and free it
Until you walked into the room .....
"I think I farted!"; (I think I farted)

I think I farted
So what are you so afraid of?
You're afraid that you're not sure of
A smell there is no cure for
I think I farted
But isn't that what life is made of?
So it worries me to say
I've never felt this way

Believe me
You really have to worry
To beat you makes me happy
And if you say
Hey, go away, I will
But I think better still
I'd better stay around and gas you
Do you think I have a case?
Let me do this in your face
Do you think you love me?

I think I farted
So what are you so afraid of?
You're afraid that you're not sure of
A smell there is no cure for
I think I farted
But isn't that what life is made of?
So it worries me to say
I've never felt this way

You don't know what you're up against
(no)
You don't know what it's all about
(oh no)
I've go so much to spread about
(spread about)
Hey! I think I farted
So what are you so afraid of?
You're afraid that you're not sure of
A smell there is no cure for
I think I farted
But isn't that what life is made of?
So it worries me to say
I've never felt this way

I think I farted
So what are you so afraid of?
You're afraid that you're not sure of
A smell there is no cure for
I think I farted
But isn't that what life is made of?
So it worries me to say
I've never felt this way

Say it ain't so! Next thing we're going to find out is that Tiger puts his pants on one leg at a time.

Hammie - that was really, uhhh...special. yeah, special!

TW: Excuse me, folks. You seem to be having a rough time on this green. May we play through?
Exasperated golfer: No, you'll just have to wait your turn like everyone else. We'll be done soon.
TW: RRRRIIIIIPPPPP!!!
Golfer: Alright, team, let's take shelter! Sounds like a thunderstorm....

LMAO @ Rick and a HUGE FART SNORK @ Hammie!!

Dave, I think you should remember this for your next golf tournament. (Does the Dave Barry Golf Classic still happen or is it just a product of my fading memory, which has decided that since it can no longer rememebr anything that it will just make stuff up?)

Tiger's farting, John Daly is getting in knock down drag-outs with the missus....

Damn, I guess I'll have to start going to the demolition derby to get my fix of sophisticated culture....

Clark - Hey, rental car demo derby. You can participate, but be sure to get the insurance.

And return it with a full tank. Of Gas! teehehehe.

Lol Hammie, you just made my Dey!!

(Is that original - and new?)

I just had a Varsity chili burger with onions and their patented onion rings (5000% of your mdr of grease). TIGER, YOU'RE GOING DOWN!

Is this why they're making the green jacket a foot longer, with a charcoal lining?

Wow, Hammond. Just wow.

So - why haven't any of you commented? They asked...

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