SQUIRREL TERRORISM UPDATE
Now they have taken over Bald Knob.
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June 30, 2007
THE WOMEN OF RESTON
(Thanks to Siouxie)
CANCEL THAT HAWAII VACATION
You're going to Little Chute, Wis.
(Thanks to Jeff Meyerson)
HEADLINE OF THE DAY SO FAR
And we are not saying another word.
(Thanks to DavCat)
YOUR LEARN-SOMETHING-NEW-EVERY-DAY FACT OF THE DAY
There are many squirrels in Nigeria.
(Thanks to Mike Pontillo)
GOD HELP US IF IRAN FINDS OUT ABOUT THIS
Gummy Bears in potassium chlorate.
(Thanks to Justin Barber)
CHILDREN'S TV PROGRAMMING, HAMAS STYLE
(Thanks to Siouxie)
June 29, 2007
DO YOU WANT FRIES WITH THAT...
(Thanks to Billy Bob)
VACATION DESTINATION OF THE WEEK
(Thanks to Elon Weintraub)
AT LAST, A CITY WITH THE COURAGE TO CRACK DOWN
....on these damn classical-flute-players.
(Thanks to Jon Harris)
EXCITING NEW WEAPON IN THE ANNOYING-NEIGHBOR WAR
(Thanks to Clean Hands)
THE QUESTION IS, DID IT VOTE FOR MITT ROMNEY?
(Thanks to Siouxie)
CRIMINAL MASTERMIND OF THE DAY SO FAR
(Thanks to Jon Harris)
THE PIVOTAL ISSUE IN THE NEXT PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION
Mitt Romney's roof-riding dog.
(Thanks to Gina Donahue)
THOSE BASTARDS
So I went to this site and plugged in my blog address to see what my rating is, and this is what I got:
The explanation was:
This rating was determined based on the presence of the following words:
bastards (1x)
COME ON BACK, RICHARD GERE
(Thanks to Justin Barber)
EDUCATOR OF THE WEEK SO FAR, DUDE
(Thanks to Siouxie)
KILLER WEEKEND
This blog's pal and bandmate and co-author Ridley Pearson has a terrific new book coming out this summer called Killer Weekend. You can go to the Amazon site and see exclusive video of Ridley and me sitting in my back yard and trying to keep reasonably straight faces while we engage in flagrant strumpeting. But it really is an excellent book.
MOTORIST OF THE WEEK SO FAR
(Also thanks to Just Ducky)
HER MISTAKE WAS NOT PUTTING THEM INTO A CLEAR, ONE-QUART RESEALABLE PLASTIC BAG
A woman on a flight to Bolivia from -- Surprise! -- Miami had 500 bullets in her luggage. She told Bolivian officials it was cheese.
(Thanks to Just Ducky)
ATTENTION ALL UNITS
Be on the lookout for the Wienermobile. Because you never know who could be driving that thing.
ENGLAND
As you know, the news from London is not cheery this morning. In an effort to lighten the mood, here's a photo taken yesterday by Mrs. Blog, who's over there covering Wimbledon tennis. She tells us this is a sign outside the Emmanuel Church of Wimbledon Village:
RUSTLED-FIBERGLASS-COW UPDATE
AMERICANS: DO THEY HAVE TOO MUCH SPARE TIME?
We report; you decide.
GREATER SANDUSKY DINING OUT REPORT
This has been your Greater Sandusky Dining Out Report.
June 28, 2007
WHEN IT'S TIME TO CLEAN UP AFTER A GOOD PARTY AT YOUR PLACE...
(Thanks to hd4mtns)
CRIMINAL MASTERMINDS OF THE WEEK SO FAR
WE'RE WITH HER
(Thanks to Cheryl Howard)
FINALLY
A communications breakthrough: The Move Over sticker.
(Also thanks to DavCat14)
NO THANKS; WE'LL JUST ORDER PIZZA
(Thanks to Siouxie)
FLORIDA
(Thanks to DavCat14)
THOSE HEARTLESS TERRORIST BASTARDS
Now they're abandoning trumpets.
(Thanks to Ginger Bruner)
THERE IS NOTHING LOWER
IRISH CHILDREN'S-CARTOON CONCEPT OF THE WEEK SO FAR
PLUMBING CONTRACTORS, TAKE NOTE
The presence of a toilet in the central part of any space can be quite disastrous. It causes a disbalance in the energies and the Water element can be too Yin and destabilising.
GET READY, PEOPLE OF BRITAIN:
(Thanks to sfastert)
GOOD NAME FOR A ROCK BAND
UPDATE ON THE GUY WHO CLAIMS HE DIDN'T REALIZE THAT THE REASON HE HAD A HEADACHE IS THAT HE GOT SHOT IN THE HEAD
The story is getting more believable all the time.
(Thanks to Jon Harris)
June 27, 2007
ANOTHER REASON WHY WE LOVE GUYS
They're romantic, and they love to cook.
(Thanks to Siouxie)
DON'T YOU HATE IT...
....when people drop in unexpectedly?
(Also thanks to Annette Gaudrau, who notes, "Tough house to sell.")
UM, OK, BUT....
...how do they know which ones are poachers?
(Also thanks to Janice Gelb)
"IT'S OK, OFFICER...
...I'm an Indonesian chef."
(Thanks to Annette Gaudreau)
MARK JULY 7 ON YOUR CALENDAR
(Thanks to Megan)
OH, SURE, THE GOVERNMENT WANTS YOU TO BELIEVE THEY'RE TREE TRUNKS
(Thanks to Janice Gelb)
IT'S A WEIGHT-LOSS AID AND A GOOD NAME FOR A ROCK BAND
(Thanks to DavCat14)
LAWSUIT OF THE DAY SO FAR
As well as an excellent addition to one's resumé: Dangerously Chewy
(Thanks to jon harris)