JUST WHAT WE NEED!
Yesterday this blog's daughter, Sophie, came home from school with a live praying mantis. It was in a baby-food jar with some dirt and leaves, and holes punched in the lid. All the kids got them from the science teacher (Thanks, Science Teacher!) who told them they should feed their mantises fruit flies. Sophie named her mantis "Preci," which is short for "Preciosa," because what else are you going to name a creature that looks like this?
So we spent the evening trying to find fruit flies for Preci. Here in South Florida, it is usually very easy to find insect life. Just examine your leg, or look in your food, and there will almost always be some kind of bug crawling around. But of course last night there were no insects anywhere, and Sophie was worried that Preci would starve to death. So I went outside and took down a light-fixture covering, which was filled with dead bugs, which we gave to Preci, who responded with a look of heartfelt mantis gratitude:
This is going to be a rewarding pet experience.
Ah, the joys of parenthood.
Next P-T conference you have my permission to give the teacher a stern look. (I was going to say 'smack her' but as the spouse of a former teacher I know that would Be Wrong.)
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | May 30, 2007 at 09:06 AM
Be sure to add Preci as a dependent when you file your income tax.
Posted by: Hammond Rye | May 30, 2007 at 09:07 AM
Could you have Preci stand next to an everyday object (Walter would do) so we can get a sense of her actual size?
If she's big enough, we got some cool locusts emerging here, and we'd be happy to send her some. As it is, we're forced to watch every Perky News Team in Chicago demonstrate how to serve them to actual people.
Posted by: Betsy | May 30, 2007 at 09:08 AM
Woooohooooo..... Dave's (daughter's) very own pet Awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwdrey. At least we know she's in good hands until next season.
Posted by: Bãrön vønKlýff | May 30, 2007 at 09:10 AM
Awwww. Isn't it so.... It's a bug. I got nothin'.
Posted by: «LabSpecimen» | May 30, 2007 at 09:11 AM
This is another classic case of some misguided individual inflicting unnecessary trauma on a poor defenseless ceature under the pretext of education.
Posted by: (Sweet home) Al Obama | May 30, 2007 at 09:21 AM
when he was in high school, a bio. teacher gave insomniac jr. , a corn snake which we had for several years, though kurt (for cobain) is no longer with us...
unless you want to warp her permanently, don't get preci a mate...
Posted by: insomniac | May 30, 2007 at 09:22 AM
you are so missing a valuable opportunity to start sophie's education. you need to find a male mantis. this will both feed preci, entertain the whole family, AND, provide important sex information. really. trust me on this.
Posted by: crossgirl | May 30, 2007 at 09:22 AM
This is another classic case of some misguided individual inflicting unnecessary trauma on a poor defenseless ceature under the pretext of education.
Posted by: (Sweet home) Al Obama | 09:21 AM on May 30, 2007
kind of like algegra!
Posted by: crossgirl | May 30, 2007 at 09:24 AM
CG, I was thinking the same thing. Female mantiseses (manti?) bite the head off the male mantis after mating. Now that would be worth the price of admission right there!
Posted by: Val | May 30, 2007 at 09:26 AM
Give it a mufflehead!
Better yet, give it a mate and watch it eat the other one's head off after mating. YAY!!! Fun and educational!!!
Posted by: casey | May 30, 2007 at 09:27 AM
**snork** @ cg.
I pity that poor Science Teacher when it's time for evaluations. Hm. You don't suppose he's been sacked and this is a final act of revenge, do you?
Posted by: DeskDiva | May 30, 2007 at 09:27 AM
Well, dang, stupid pesky clients, who do they think they are that they can just call me and ask me questions about their cases? I'm busy trying to be funny here and while answering questions, about 3 people beat me to the head eating point. (New meaning the "head"?)
Posted by: casey | May 30, 2007 at 09:29 AM
I meant new meaning to giving head.
Posted by: casey | May 30, 2007 at 09:29 AM
Oh my gosh. They gave Sophie my ex-wife for a science project.
Posted by: ken in jax | May 30, 2007 at 09:30 AM
sick minds think alike
Posted by: crossgirl | May 30, 2007 at 09:30 AM
Well, my day is complete. I have managed to be offensive and feel deeply ashamed of myself. I'll go to the corner now.
Posted by: casey | May 30, 2007 at 09:31 AM
Um...
Do they eat lovebugs?
Posted by: Howard from Broward | May 30, 2007 at 09:32 AM
What is it with kids and critters? My mini-me brings home anything and everything that breathes, eats, and poops.
I did convince her to release "Snickers the Snake" back into the wild before it croaked. TG for small miracles!
Good luck, Dave. I'll be looking forward to your next column on the efficiency of our education system. :)
Posted by: Meditrina | May 30, 2007 at 09:36 AM
Awe! Freaking cute. Preci! The trouble comes when you try to explain about praying mantis heaven, when Preci inevitably bites the big fruit fly. At least it prays, so you know it's going to heaven. That would be a good talking point. Goldfish are so much easier. Just one flush and the rats have lunch.
Posted by: Bethie | May 30, 2007 at 09:36 AM
Welcome, Obama! Glad to have a new face on the crew. Play nice and put your toys away when you're done. (NSFW)
Oh, and NEVER forget to hover. ;-)
Especially on Annie's links.
Posted by: DeskDiva | May 30, 2007 at 09:37 AM
*sits in the naughty corner with casey*
Posted by: DeskDiva | May 30, 2007 at 09:38 AM
Awe! Freaking cute. Preci! The trouble comes when you try to explain about praying mantis heaven, when Preci inevitably bites the big fruit fly. At least it prays, so you know it's going to heaven. That would be a good talking point. Goldfish are so much easier. Just one flush and the rats have lunch.
Posted by: Bethie | May 30, 2007 at 09:39 AM
Thanks DeskDiva, my mom taught me to always clean up after myself, and I've been lurking for some time and I'm fully aware of Annie and Stevie laying linking landmines all over the blog.
Posted by: (Sweet home) Al Obama | May 30, 2007 at 09:46 AM
Mornin' all!! Preci is precious in a eeeekie kinda way!
What WE did when my girls were little is "hatch" or "birth" or whatever it is that butterflies do, from cocoons to butterflies and then release them to
dielive out the remainder of their short lives.It was bewwwwwwwwtiful!
Posted by: Siouxie | May 30, 2007 at 09:48 AM
Sounds to me like a prison-break is in order. Then Preci can find its own fruit flies.
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | May 30, 2007 at 09:48 AM
*joins casey in the corner just cuz she's ma friend!*
Posted by: Siouxie | May 30, 2007 at 09:49 AM
CYE Suz!
Posted by: casey | May 30, 2007 at 09:54 AM
ISIANMTU
My daughter came running in the house one afternoon, heading straight for her room. She had a look of pure joy on her face and something cupped in her freshly dirty hands. My alarm bells started going off loudly, so I called out, "Hey, princess, what have you got there?"
As she disappeared in her room, I heard her call out happily, "Ants!"
Posted by: Hammond Rye | May 30, 2007 at 09:54 AM
casey, I did ;-)
*cannot wait*!!! (will respond shortly)
------------------------------------------------------
hmm ok...back on topic!!
Hammie, did ya have ants in yer pants the rest of the day??
Posted by: Siouxie | May 30, 2007 at 09:57 AM
*Waves @ Siouxie and rest of naughty corner occupants!!*
Posted by: Hammond Rye | May 30, 2007 at 09:59 AM
i filled my sister's suitcase with fire ants before she left for spring break once. it was no where near as fun as the snake in her room.
Posted by: crossgirl | May 30, 2007 at 10:04 AM
*Waves @ Hammie back*!
*checks for ants*
Posted by: Siouxie | May 30, 2007 at 10:05 AM
I'm a little squeamish but my girls always wanted/had critters like this--ah, the memories. "Daniel" was a popular name for such visitors. Up north, we have to buy live food (crickets) in the pet store, for a mantis or those green anole lizards. You're so lucky in Florida, where you can just run outside and scoop up a lizard anytime you feel like it!
Posted by: tinkerbell | May 30, 2007 at 10:07 AM
I just got back from the land of wood ticks, so any insect that doesn't crawl up my leg and suck blood looks pretty benign to me. (insert ex-wife joke here)
* Pauses to chug bottle of Lyme disease vaccine *
P.S. to Mr. Blog the Mantis Wrangler -- got any ripe bananas around, or even just the peel? Leave it in Preci's (presumably enclosed) home and she'll soon have fresh meat.
Posted by: padraig | May 30, 2007 at 10:09 AM
tinkerbell, I don't think "lucky" is what florida residents think of when they think of lizzards.
Posted by: casey | May 30, 2007 at 10:11 AM
I like the love-bug idea and padraig is right, but the easiest thing would be your (or a neighbor's) fallen citrus. Also, a larger container, placed outside, with 'hardware cloth' (wide mesh screen) over the top and some rotting citrus within would bring in the fruit flies.
Posted by: CJrun | May 30, 2007 at 10:19 AM
I thought praying mantises were one of the things it was against the law to have - some protective status or other... At any rate, good luck with the little guy or gal, as the case may be. How do you know it's (not its) a she, BTW? Or do I (or Sophie) want to know?
Posted by: Kathybear | May 30, 2007 at 10:28 AM
Um, got any of that Edringer left, Dave?
Posted by: Preci | May 30, 2007 at 10:29 AM
*Hic!* I meant Erdinger.
Posted by: Preci | May 30, 2007 at 10:29 AM
That Mantis looks so familiar.
Is Preci's middle name Audrey?
Posted by: Steve (The 24 Guy) | May 30, 2007 at 10:35 AM
Preci feamles decapitate and devour the male precis after mating. You may want to wait until Sophie is 17 before you tell her this.
Precis also like aphids, a lot. You will find these in your salad right next to the fruit flies.
Posted by: Mikey123 | May 30, 2007 at 10:38 AM
females...
Posted by: Mikey123 | May 30, 2007 at 10:39 AM
Dave, you have SO captured the look of heartfelt mantis gratitude. This is art at its finest!
Posted by: Trouble | May 30, 2007 at 10:40 AM
Awww, I love doing stuff like this. Dave, mantids will eat almost anything. if it moves, they'll eat it. Fruit flies? What a waste. Find some crickets or little grasshoppers or box elder bugs... then you're in for a show!
Posted by: Alison | May 30, 2007 at 10:44 AM
Al -
I'm not clear: is Dave the aforementioned "defenseless creature" suffering trauma??
Posted by: jon | May 30, 2007 at 10:48 AM
dont get toooo friendly. the females bite the heads off of male suitors. wouldnt want you to give the wrong impression....
Posted by: queensbee | May 30, 2007 at 11:01 AM
Good foto, Dave ... is that your new/best version of the crapcam, or did you merely scan the Mantis Trading Card file ... merely curious ...
(TRADING CARD INFO: Preci is having a good season so far. She lives in a comfortable dwelling found in the home of a young human girl named Sophie. Preci likes aphids, crickets, fruit flies and ants, but is not fond of uncles ... Omar, or otherwise ...)
Posted by: OtheU(manity) | May 30, 2007 at 11:37 AM
*waves at Hammie from the naughty corner. drags him into it where he belongs*
Posted by: DeskDiva | May 30, 2007 at 12:04 PM
Geez, Dave, just get poor Sophie a puppy, would ya?
Posted by: Guin | May 30, 2007 at 02:37 PM
Just be glad Preci came home this time of the year. When I was Sophie's age, the mantis came home in the fall. Did you know they lay eggs then? And that the egg sacs are supposed to hatch in December, by which time they will be back in the science room at school? And that your mother can get up one morning in October and find several hundred midget manti trying to find food in the kitchen, or trying to escape out the windows to do so? And that cats get sick from eating too many mini-manti?
Posted by: eastwestchester | May 30, 2007 at 03:13 PM
Many Mini-Manti wbagnfa ... um ... Midget band?
Posted by: OtheU(manity) | May 30, 2007 at 03:27 PM
SNORK at EWC and OtheU (which makes it harder to try to pronounce "Many Mini-Manti").
Posted by: Renee (the First) | May 30, 2007 at 04:57 PM
ISIANMTU
When my kids were small, they found a Preci of their own.
We had recently acquired some hermit crabs, and in order to "play outside" with the hermit crabs (who usually lived indoors in the empty fish aquarium -- the goldfish having died the year before, shortly after another mom gave FISH away at a kindergarten birthday party as GOODY BAGS ), my kids made use of a tadpole habitat .
Still with me?
OK, so we owned a tadpole habitat. Why? Because MOTY (Mother-of-the-Year, Yours Truly) thought, the Christmas before, that watching tadpoles turn into frogs would be SUCH an educational and fun activity for the kids in winter. Except that once the habitat arrived, it had a COUPON for tadpoles that could only be used in the spring or summer months where we live, so as to prevent tadpoles from being delivered in the freezing weather and turning into tadpop-sicles on one's front doorstep in January. Also, frogs eat crickets, which one apparently must purchase from a pet store on a continuous basis , if one intends to feed thm more than once or twice in their lifetime. Yeah, crickets. Not happening.
Still with me?
So, we had an unused tadpole habitat, and nothing to put in it. So that's where the hermit crabs came in. Lovely little creatures they were. But they didn't like the tadpole habitat too much, and showed their dissatisfaction primarily by dying. So the hermit crabs were moved into the unused 10-gallon fish tank , heater lamps were purchased, and all was well. Several repurchases of hermit crabs later, summer arrived, and the tadpole habitat became a little portable playpen for them outside.
Until our very own Preci came along! Our praying mantis was beautiful, just like Preci. And hungry, too! So the kids put Preci in the tadpole habitat, and spent the afternoon looking for flies, and crickets, and pill bugs , and...
Still with me?
The moral of the story is:
Don't leave an enclosed tadpole habitat in the sun. Praying mantises do explode .
That is all.
Posted by: Cat R. | May 30, 2007 at 07:13 PM
Cat:
Ewwwwwwwwww.
That is all.
Posted by: Renee (the First) | May 30, 2007 at 10:46 PM
That's bug is Zorak, Spaceghost's enemy. Don't y'all know yore villans around here?!
BFF,
Miss T
Posted by: Miss Trashahassee | June 04, 2007 at 01:11 AM