IT'S ABOUT DAMN TIME
The South Africa Tissue Manufacturer Association takes a stand.
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March 28, 2007
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"...to let consumers know that the toilet paper they are buying is legitimate."
Illegitimate toilet paper? *snork*
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | March 28, 2007 at 09:08 AM
how legit is it? does it have street cred?
Posted by: crossgirl | March 28, 2007 at 09:09 AM
Only 250 sheet on a roll??!!?? That works out to...
carry the 7...
times 3...
...
ONE wipe for my wife.
Posted by: The Dread Pirate Chris | March 28, 2007 at 09:10 AM
I'm sure they'll get to the bottom of it.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | March 28, 2007 at 09:12 AM
One ply? Talk about problems.
"Give me two ply, or give me a rash and stinky fingers."
Posted by: The blog reader formerly known as Matt | March 28, 2007 at 09:12 AM
Glad they didn't let this one slip thru the cracks....
Posted by: Punkin Poo | March 28, 2007 at 09:13 AM
Posted by: jon | March 28, 2007 at 09:17 AM
Posted by: jon | March 28, 2007 at 09:18 AM
Gonna be one of those days ain't it?
Posted by: jon | March 28, 2007 at 09:19 AM
Guess there's no chances for leafs anymore ...
I, for one, am proud to see that SATFA is working hard to remove illegal TP from the SA market. Otherwise they'd have to pay attention to those that don't have access to clean drinking water.
Posted by: kibby F5™ | March 28, 2007 at 09:21 AM
Ok this is now my new goal in life - to be a member of the toilet paper police.
You - up against the wall and spread um... and dont give me any of your [email protected] Your roll of TP only has 469 squares. We're going to wipe the floor with you.
Posted by: From another world | March 28, 2007 at 09:31 AM
About time they get those Bas__rds selling "Puffed Up" rolls....
"Short Sheet Tissue" sounds like a summer camp prank
acutally "Farah Hukamdad and the Short Sheet Tissues" sounds good for something
Posted by: russellmc | March 28, 2007 at 09:43 AM
Why... why...I just don't... WHY?
Posted by: Jemmy | March 28, 2007 at 09:44 AM
And who is the poor schlub that gets saddled with the chore of counting sheets of one-ply as it goes on the roll for 15¢ per hour?
Posted by: Barøn vønKlyff | March 28, 2007 at 09:45 AM
I think I found a platform for Dave to run for President.. TP Reform
I will make TPS (Toilet paper sheets) Reports
Posted by: Chaz | March 28, 2007 at 09:47 AM
Well there's floodin' down in Jo'burg
All of the telephone lines are awry
Well there's floodin' down in Jo'burg
All of the telephone lines are awry
And I've been tryin' to call my baby
Lord and I can't get a single ply
Well short rolls are unrollin'
Man I'm standin' out in the rain
Well short rolls are unrollin'
Man I'm standin' out in the rain
Yeah cheap rolls are unrollin'
Man it's about to drive poor me insane
Well I'm leavin' you baby
Lord and I'm goin' back home to stay
Well I'm leavin' you baby
Lord and I'm goin' back home to stay
Well back home is good Charmin and no short rolls
Baby and the sun shines every day
Posted by: Hammond Rye | March 28, 2007 at 09:51 AM
We have to maintain our standards you know. Anyway I do own a DVD player and I only buy 2 or 3 ply so I wouldn't know about about being short issued.
Posted by: Mot the Hoople | March 28, 2007 at 09:52 AM
i'm not sure if this qualifies as taking a stand... more a squat, seems to me.
Posted by: insomniac | March 28, 2007 at 09:56 AM
It's a much better waste of money than declaring a State soil.
Posted by: Mot the Hoople | March 28, 2007 at 10:00 AM
Good morning people! have you hugged your TP today??
Posted by: Siouxie | March 28, 2007 at 10:00 AM
I, for one, am glad we live in a country where illegitimate toilet paper is not a problem.
Posted by: Siouxie | March 28, 2007 at 10:04 AM
Mr. Whipple has been caught squeezing the tissue and shortsheeting consumers.
Off with his head!
Posted by: Meditrina | March 28, 2007 at 10:19 AM
reminds me of that commercial where the bear is squatting in the woods...and momma bear gives him/her less TP as you dont need much with that brand
Posted by: Chaz | March 28, 2007 at 10:36 AM
I'm thinkin' that any criminal mastermind who is smart enough to make "illegitimate toilet paper" is smart enough to copy the little red logo.
And a roll has to be 110 millimeters long? That's about 4 inches. 500 sheets in 4 inches? Those are some small friggin' sheets.
Posted by: Layzeeboy | March 28, 2007 at 10:43 AM
Who uses just one sheet of TP?? 110 millimeters? .... I need more coffee.
Posted by: DavetheRed | March 28, 2007 at 10:49 AM
But Mot, why is this such a big deal? Why are there all of these rules about toilet paper?
Posted by: Jemmy | March 28, 2007 at 10:50 AM
I think the bigger issue is that
"...not many people know that the law states that every roll of one ply tissue must have 500 sheets.
I'm insatiably curious as to why they needed this law in the first place.....
Posted by: DeskDiva | March 28, 2007 at 10:58 AM
Jemmy, for the same reason that we have regulations here in the States regarding the size of the holes in Swiss cheese.
Mot, for God's sake don't suggest that, or the Oregon legislature and the SA gov't will start swapping ideas, and we'll have a mandatory depiction of the official soil on our TP rolls... which would be a big ol' pile of crap.
Posted by: Clean Hands | March 28, 2007 at 11:01 AM
Excuse the pun, but this law is designed to protect semi-literate people from being ripped off.
Posted by: Mot the Hoople | March 28, 2007 at 11:05 AM
CH - you always know how to jump start my morning with a *snork*. :)
Posted by: DeskDiva | March 28, 2007 at 11:06 AM
*thinks "ripping one off" is really more of mud's department*
Posted by: DeskDiva | March 28, 2007 at 11:07 AM
*makes mental note not to shake hands with pretorians*
Posted by: Gadfly | March 28, 2007 at 11:10 AM
Morning, all! Good song, Hammie!
Rollin’ rollin’ rollin’
Tissue’s puffed and swollen
Keep that TP rollin’
One ply
Put those sheets together
We don’t care whether
With the SA laws we’ve complied
There may be some missing
This tissue’ll have you hissing
As it takes the skin off of your hide
Move ‘em on (roll ‘em up)
Move ‘em on (roll ‘em up)
Move ‘em on (roll ‘em up)
One ply
Cut ‘em short (rip ‘em off)
Rip ‘em off (cut ‘em short)
Cut ‘em short (rip ‘em off)
One ply
Posted by: Just Ducky | March 28, 2007 at 11:17 AM
**SNORKIN' LOUDLY** at Ducky. You are sooooo good at this.
Posted by: DeskDiva | March 28, 2007 at 11:19 AM
I wish that I were making up my comment about Swiss cheese holes, but there it is.
Posted by: Clean Hands | March 28, 2007 at 11:19 AM
Thanks, ddiva! CH, pity the poor sap whose job it is to measure the swiss cheese holes!
Posted by: Just Ducky | March 28, 2007 at 11:26 AM
I still think it would be worse to count the squares of TP.
Posted by: DeskDiva | March 28, 2007 at 11:33 AM
CH-- I actually banged my head on my desk when I read the Swiss Cheese thing.
Posted by: Jemmy | March 28, 2007 at 11:59 AM
I think Dave wrote about the swiss cheese thing once. Also, there was the fight to call prunes (which are dried plums) dried plums. The govt didn't like the idea.
Posted by: Kristina L. | March 28, 2007 at 10:31 PM
trigyn scyphulus tetraptote microbar extravasation floodless marplot chemicophysics
OFCN Bookshelf - Anne Of Avonlea
http://www.cato.org/pubs/pas/pa-294.html
Posted by: Avis Munoz | December 18, 2007 at 08:23 PM