WE NEED TO TAKE UP A COLLECTION

First Leslie Sloane Zelnick splits, and now Sonia Muckle.

Comments

[casey]

Jeez. First and absolutely no comment.

[casey]

Except "Muckle". Who the h3ll wants to be known as "Muckle"?

[qsman]

Since I never get to be first, I GET TO BE SECOND!

[qsman]

oops, third now :(

[Kibby F5™]

MeThinks they get enough "practice" that they figure it's about time they start making the REAL MONEY!

Has anyone noticed how these animated advertisements are REALLY messing with the curser?

blinkity, blinity curser!

[fivver]

Instead of selling Twitny, I guess they are getting honest jobs selling used cars...

[ubetcha]

Every time I see her I throw up a little into my mouth.

[Nurse Tammy]

Used cars, or door to door vacuum sales...either is less thankless than having to try to make Twitney seem tolerable.

[Hammond Rye]

Plus there would be less chance to catch something that the Crustastun would not kill.

[Nurse Tammy]

Yeah, pretty bad when someone's cooties have superpowers.
(Have now lost my appetite - may be a way to shed holiday pounds - still not worth it)

[estrogen centrale]

Hey Dave - happy to see ya' posting!!!

[fivver]

Dave, I've been workimg on the collection. So far I've got a bag of used kitty litter and a rotten orange.

[Rusty1]

All of this is happening while the British Prime Minister's plane has problems landing in Miami. How are we to cope with all this madness?

[Nurse Tammy]

fivver - I'm in for some fuzzy leftovers! And maybe more kitty litter.

[blurk]

fivver, put me down for some used motor oil and a broken Pez™ dispenser.

[Hammond Rye]

Put me down for green bean casserole and a cat.

[Nurse Tammy]

Oooh! I donate a broken exercise bike. And the burnt crumbs from the bottom of my toaster.

[crossgirl]

adds mangy-christmas-decoration-eating-dog to collection plate along with a sticky nickel and a half eaten candy cane.

[Wyo Cowboy]

I'll bet even Tony Snow couldn't handle that job.

[wickedwitch]

i'll throw in a pair of silk stockings with a runner in each leg as well as a 15 year old fruitcake that is still sealed in the original tin.

[baligurl]

I would like to donate a box of chocolates with fingerholes in each piece, and my MIL.

[Siouxie]

*yawn*

*just woke up* Morning everyone!! where's the coffee??

I have to wake up to Twatney? Why Dave?? Why???

*rushes back to bed*

[blurk]

ww, didn't you read the article? They don't have enough publicists to handle the fruitcakes. Kindly scrounge look for something else to give.

[Siouxie]

Well my dogs kinda left me a little present this morning cuz hmm I didn't get outta bed early enough...can I donate that??? It's in a baggie. Seems appropriate, right?

[baligurl]

Here, Siouxie, have a cup of Bailey's. I've added a tablespoon of coffee to make it legit. You ARE on vacation, right?

[Siouxie]

Yummmy! thanks bali!!! YES I am ;-)

[Addicted to 24]

My god a new Spears album in 2007. What has humanity done to deserve this?

[Siouxie]

oh and Dave...welcome back to Miami. I'm betting you went somewhere cooler cuz you brought us back a some cold weather. It's a freezing 61 degrees here!!!

*warms up with the Baileys*

[Punkin Poo]

Why does this skank even need a publicist???? There's MORE than enough pubic-sity out there!

What she NEEDS is a visit from DCYF, a therapist, a vocal coach, a trailer cleaner and a professional sense-slapper-back-innerer. I volunteer for THAT.

[blurk]

Siouxie, shut up and check yer email.

[Nurse Tammy]

Punkin, can I volunteer to be your helper? Please?

[Stevie W]

We wish each of them well as they move on to their next positions as Murphy Brown's assistant and Spinal Tap's drummer, respectively.

[Siouxie]

yes, blurk dear..sheesh...you men are so damn bossy sometimes!

[Punkin Poo]

Well, I will need a holder-downerer, Tammy!

[wickedwitch]

sorry blurk, my mistake. currently in my treasure trove of crap, i have used kitty litter, ashes, an old cracked bed pan and some 5 year old blackjack gum.

[baligurl]

Punkin, when you finish with the Twatster, I have a list of my own for you to work on.

[Nurse Tammy]

Yay! Do I get to accidentally kick her a bit, too? *makes pleading eyes*

[Punkin Poo]

bali - Please sumbit in triplicate. There is a 2-4 week waiting period. Killin is slow work, ya know.

[Siouxie]

Punkin, I think we can all line up for that...kinda like in "Airplane"???

[Clean Hands]

Does the holder-downer get to use a Taser™? Or just a pillow?

[Punkin Poo]

Nurse Tammy - I am sure that with your extensive medical training and bucket load of compassion, you will know EXACTLY where and when to kick.

It's good to have another professional on board.

[Clean Hands]

Maybe Chloe is available for that job?

[Punkin Poo]

Good question, CH......I say we alternate.

Anybody else have an opinion on that?

[Nurse Tammy]

Yes, Punkin, I am so very compassionate that I will, with an almost straight face, be able to say that it will hurt me more than her. Almost, mind you.

[baligurl]

Well, I don't know, Punkin'. Like one of my favorite girl-type friends often says, "I got a gun, and the pigs are runnin'." I love that woman.

[estrogen centrale]

Punkin, she also needs her personal shopper to get to Victoria's Secret for some undies!!!

[Punkin Poo]

Oh! I just got my New Year's Eve party invite! It's a combo party being thrown by the Zelnicks and the Muckleses.

It says here that at midnight they have a blonde haired pinata to be cracked open! How fun!

Oh wait, it goes on to say "...please try to avoid striking the chest area of the body pinata, as it is SO hard to get silicone off the wallpaper."

Don't I know it....

[baligurl]

*snork* @ Siouxie's "Airplane" reference!

[Clean Hands]

Wouldn't Wal*Mart undies be a better idea for her? More coverage, and she might get to meet a better class of people than she has been hanging out with.

[Punkin Poo]

Let's just sew it up and put duct tape over it, CH

[Stevie W]

She's hot.

[Clean Hands]

Okay, but "who bells the cat?" I don't want to go anywhere near that thing.

[baligurl]

Excellent point, CH. Oh, and might I add, I got clean thru the holidays with not ONE visit to WalMart. I'm fairly certain they have a missing poster up with my photo, I haven't been in almost 4 months. WaH00!

[estrogen centrale]

*shudders*

Oh Clean, I wouldn't wish WM undies on anyone. I don't think there is enough fabric softener in the world...

[KDF]

crossgirl, Sticky Nickel WBA excellent NFARB.

[Nurse Tammy]

I dunno, Punkin. Do you feel up to it? My sewing isn't too good, but I can contact an vet pal for the shoulder length gloves.

[baligurl]

EC, they've gotta be more comfy than auto upholstery.

[Siouxie]

ec, I doubt she'd notice the softness of the undies...that there dangly bit is probably numb by now.

[fivver]

Or at least has calluses.

[Clean Hands]

Jeebus! She's got a dangly bit? I thought that was just Paris...

[Siouxie]

OK question people....

Why did my next door neighbors decided to re-tile their roof while I'm on vacation?? HUH?? They started at 8 am this morning!! good thing I zonked out again...but sheeesh!!!!

They're banging and clankin...kinda what I'd love to be doing to Twatney's head.

[OtheU(manity)]

Those of y'all naggin' about this subject fer a thread ... it merely occurred to moi ownself that it IS "Trash/Garbage Day" here in Beulahla, ND ... so ... mebbe Dave is thinkin' it's appropriate ... fer some of us, at least ...

[Hammond Rye]

When they tried to contain Chernobyl, they covered it in several tons of concrete...

[estrogen centrale]

Actually, it is Lilo that has the dangly bit. keep your skanks straight, people!!!

[baligurl]

Ah, Lilo...pr, as we refer to her during prayer at church, Dear Firecrotch.

[baligurl]

(erases 'p', tosses up an 'o')

[Siouxie]

that would be 'decide'....need more cafe.

CH, if you noticed the picture...it's dangly. Reminds me of Borat when he said his wife's "vagin" hangs like the sleeve of a wizzard.

*snork*

[estrogen centrale]

*makes note to pay off the remainder to the roofers for doing the work, while Sioux is off*

Heh, heh, heh...

[estrogen centrale]

*snork @ baligurl*

[Clean Hands]

Geeze, I musta missed that particular ambiguously-labeled link. Thank heavens.

[Siouxie]

sheesh...ec! I'll have to get back at ya...hmmm...

[estrogen centrale]

Oh, You will. I have no doubt that you will.

Hey, your neighbors have probably been on the roofers appointment list, since post-Katrina, -Rita, or -Wilma.

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

Publicists everywhere are running and hiding, for fear they'll be chosen next to represent her.

[Nurse Tammy]

Running and hiding? I would think they'd change careers.

[Siouxie in her jammies]

LOL Lisa...I'm thinking even Lizzie Grubman...the one that ran over a crowd of people is in hiding.

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

Tammy-That too.

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

Hi Siouxie!

[Siouxie in her jammies]

Lisa!! sorry...I'm in need of more coffee..as you can see I'm still in my jammies ;-)

[Kibby F5™]

I've a 15 yr old fruitcake too!

He really gets pissed off when I call him that too... too bad.

[Punkin Poo]

*only one in office today. Sitting alone. Reflecting on the past two holidays and wondering if I'M the crazy one or if it's EVERYONE else?*

*decides it's everyone else*

[southerngirl]

no, punkin, it's probably you.

NTTAWWT.

[Clean Hands]

Check your hat, Punkin. If you're raising snakes there, then it's probably you. If not, then it's everyone else. If no hat, then the future is murky.

This has been your hat fortune.

[Punkin Poo]

no hat, but I feel invisible snakes crawling on me....what does that mean?

[Clean Hands]

You need to change your soap?

[baligurl]

I'm in the office today, as well. It's nice and quiet, and I have a new computer, so I'm having a pretty good day.

[OtheU(manity)]

Invisible Snakes wbagnfa ... um ... grunge band?

[Siouxie]

Ok...to Tony Blair is vacationing here at the home of Robin Gibb. How exciting. right? A BeeGee reunion in the works??

[Annie Where-but-here]

Isn't F-Ked looking for a job? Let me rephrase that. Isn't he unemployed?

[estrogen centrale]

Ooh Siouxie, let's go over to Star Island tonight. Maybe we can meet some Brit secret service agents!!!! I could get into an accent, be it King's English or Cockney twang...

[estrogen centrale]

Punkin & baligurl, I'm at work, too. *sighs* Lots of work and the developers are giving me fits.
However, I am being taken out momentarily for a much belated b-day lunch. Yipee!

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

Siouxie-Tony Blair as a BeeGee? I'd pay to see that.

Annie-Yeah, he's unemployed. Personally, I think it was just a "bad rap."

[estrogen centrale]

Annie, isn't he supposed to be wrestling or someting? Could swear I read that... here.

[Annie Where-but-here]

*snork*@ LBFF's 'bad rap.' Maybe F-ked should apply for this publicist position. He seems to be able to get plenty of publicity without doing anything.

How hard can this job be anyway? I'm not wearing underwear and I get plenty of publicity without any help at all.

Actually I think this was a typo. Twitney is really looking for someone to handle her (shudder) pubicity.

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

Annie-eeewwwww @ pubicity.

[Siouxie]

ec, I'm up for it! I love a british accent!! cockney too...hmmm...

um...Annie...he's already handled THAT.

[Punkin Poo]

Annie - no, please, no....WHY?????

[Clean Hands]

*shudder* @ AWbh

[Clean Hands]

Let me add a double-*shudder* for Siouxie. Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew. Brain bleach, stat.

[Hammond Rye]

Argggh

[Annie Where-but-here]

Ok, so who should apply for this job - Dennis Rodman? Rumsfeld? Bueller?