WE NEED TO TAKE UP A COLLECTION
First Leslie Sloane Zelnick splits, and now Sonia Muckle.
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First Leslie Sloane Zelnick splits, and now Sonia Muckle.
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Jeez. First and absolutely no comment.
Posted by: casey | December 27, 2006 at 08:46 AM
Except "Muckle". Who the h3ll wants to be known as "Muckle"?
Posted by: casey | December 27, 2006 at 08:47 AM
Since I never get to be first, I GET TO BE SECOND!
Posted by: qsman | December 27, 2006 at 08:47 AM
oops, third now :(
Posted by: qsman | December 27, 2006 at 08:48 AM
MeThinks they get enough "practice" that they figure it's about time they start making the REAL MONEY!
Has anyone noticed how these animated advertisements are REALLY messing with the curser?
blinkity, blinity curser!
Posted by: Kibby F5™ | December 27, 2006 at 08:49 AM
Instead of selling Twitny, I guess they are getting honest jobs selling used cars...
Posted by: fivver | December 27, 2006 at 08:57 AM
Every time I see her I throw up a little into my mouth.
Posted by: ubetcha | December 27, 2006 at 09:02 AM
Used cars, or door to door vacuum sales...either is less thankless than having to try to make Twitney seem tolerable.
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | December 27, 2006 at 09:17 AM
Plus there would be less chance to catch something that the Crustastun would not kill.
Posted by: Hammond Rye | December 27, 2006 at 09:20 AM
Yeah, pretty bad when someone's cooties have superpowers.
(Have now lost my appetite - may be a way to shed holiday pounds - still not worth it)
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | December 27, 2006 at 09:26 AM
Hey Dave - happy to see ya' posting!!!
Posted by: estrogen centrale | December 27, 2006 at 09:30 AM
Dave, I've been workimg on the collection. So far I've got a bag of used kitty litter and a rotten orange.
Posted by: fivver | December 27, 2006 at 09:37 AM
All of this is happening while the British Prime Minister's plane has problems landing in Miami. How are we to cope with all this madness?
Posted by: Rusty1 | December 27, 2006 at 09:39 AM
fivver - I'm in for some fuzzy leftovers! And maybe more kitty litter.
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | December 27, 2006 at 09:40 AM
fivver, put me down for some used motor oil and a broken Pez™ dispenser.
Posted by: blurk | December 27, 2006 at 09:43 AM
Put me down for green bean casserole and a cat.
Posted by: Hammond Rye | December 27, 2006 at 09:46 AM
Oooh! I donate a broken exercise bike. And the burnt crumbs from the bottom of my toaster.
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | December 27, 2006 at 09:50 AM
adds mangy-christmas-decoration-eating-dog to collection plate along with a sticky nickel and a half eaten candy cane.
Posted by: crossgirl | December 27, 2006 at 09:50 AM
I'll bet even Tony Snow couldn't handle that job.
Posted by: Wyo Cowboy | December 27, 2006 at 09:53 AM
i'll throw in a pair of silk stockings with a runner in each leg as well as a 15 year old fruitcake that is still sealed in the original tin.
Posted by: wickedwitch | December 27, 2006 at 09:56 AM
I would like to donate a box of chocolates with fingerholes in each piece, and my MIL.
Posted by: baligurl | December 27, 2006 at 09:56 AM
*yawn*
*just woke up* Morning everyone!! where's the coffee??
I have to wake up to Twatney? Why Dave?? Why???
*rushes back to bed*
Posted by: Siouxie | December 27, 2006 at 09:58 AM
ww, didn't you read the article? They don't have enough publicists to handle the fruitcakes. Kindly
scroungelook for something else to give.Posted by: blurk | December 27, 2006 at 09:58 AM
Well my dogs kinda left me a little present this morning cuz hmm I didn't get outta bed early enough...can I donate that??? It's in a baggie. Seems appropriate, right?
Posted by: Siouxie | December 27, 2006 at 09:59 AM
Here, Siouxie, have a cup of Bailey's. I've added a tablespoon of coffee to make it legit. You ARE on vacation, right?
Posted by: baligurl | December 27, 2006 at 09:59 AM
Yummmy! thanks bali!!! YES I am ;-)
Posted by: Siouxie | December 27, 2006 at 10:03 AM
My god a new Spears album in 2007. What has humanity done to deserve this?
Posted by: Addicted to 24 | December 27, 2006 at 10:06 AM
oh and Dave...welcome back to Miami. I'm betting you went somewhere cooler cuz you brought us back a some cold weather. It's a freezing 61 degrees here!!!
*warms up with the Baileys*
Posted by: Siouxie | December 27, 2006 at 10:08 AM
Why does this skank even need a publicist???? There's MORE than enough pubic-sity out there!
What she NEEDS is a visit from DCYF, a therapist, a vocal coach, a trailer cleaner and a professional sense-slapper-back-innerer. I volunteer for THAT.
Posted by: Punkin Poo | December 27, 2006 at 10:09 AM
Siouxie, shut up and check yer email.
Posted by: blurk | December 27, 2006 at 10:09 AM
Punkin, can I volunteer to be your helper? Please?
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | December 27, 2006 at 10:11 AM
We wish each of them well as they move on to their next positions as Murphy Brown's assistant and Spinal Tap's drummer, respectively.
Posted by: Stevie W | December 27, 2006 at 10:11 AM
yes, blurk dear..sheesh...you men are so damn bossy sometimes!
Posted by: Siouxie | December 27, 2006 at 10:12 AM
Well, I will need a holder-downerer, Tammy!
Posted by: Punkin Poo | December 27, 2006 at 10:12 AM
sorry blurk, my mistake. currently in my treasure trove of crap, i have used kitty litter, ashes, an old cracked bed pan and some 5 year old blackjack gum.
Posted by: wickedwitch | December 27, 2006 at 10:12 AM
Punkin, when you finish with the Twatster, I have a list of my own for you to work on.
Posted by: baligurl | December 27, 2006 at 10:12 AM
Yay! Do I get to accidentally kick her a bit, too? *makes pleading eyes*
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | December 27, 2006 at 10:13 AM
bali - Please sumbit in triplicate. There is a 2-4 week waiting period. Killin is slow work, ya know.
Posted by: Punkin Poo | December 27, 2006 at 10:14 AM
Punkin, I think we can all line up for that...kinda like in "Airplane"???
Posted by: Siouxie | December 27, 2006 at 10:14 AM
Does the holder-downer get to use a Taser™? Or just a pillow?
Posted by: Clean Hands | December 27, 2006 at 10:15 AM
Nurse Tammy - I am sure that with your extensive medical training and bucket load of compassion, you will know EXACTLY where and when to kick.
It's good to have another professional on board.
Posted by: Punkin Poo | December 27, 2006 at 10:15 AM
Maybe Chloe is available for that job?
Posted by: Clean Hands | December 27, 2006 at 10:15 AM
Good question, CH......I say we alternate.
Anybody else have an opinion on that?
Posted by: Punkin Poo | December 27, 2006 at 10:16 AM
Yes, Punkin, I am so very compassionate that I will, with an almost straight face, be able to say that it will hurt me more than her. Almost, mind you.
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | December 27, 2006 at 10:19 AM
Well, I don't know, Punkin'. Like one of my favorite girl-type friends often says, "I got a gun, and the pigs are runnin'." I love that woman.
Posted by: baligurl | December 27, 2006 at 10:19 AM
Punkin, she also needs her personal shopper to get to Victoria's Secret for some undies!!!
Posted by: estrogen centrale | December 27, 2006 at 10:19 AM
Oh! I just got my New Year's Eve party invite! It's a combo party being thrown by the Zelnicks and the Muckleses.
It says here that at midnight they have a blonde haired pinata to be cracked open! How fun!
Oh wait, it goes on to say "...please try to avoid striking the chest area of the
bodypinata, as it is SO hard to get silicone off the wallpaper."Don't I know it....
Posted by: Punkin Poo | December 27, 2006 at 10:20 AM
*snork* @ Siouxie's "Airplane" reference!
Posted by: baligurl | December 27, 2006 at 10:20 AM
Wouldn't Wal*Mart undies be a better idea for her? More coverage, and she might get to meet a better class of people than she has been hanging out with.
Posted by: Clean Hands | December 27, 2006 at 10:20 AM
Let's just sew it up and put duct tape over it, CH
Posted by: Punkin Poo | December 27, 2006 at 10:21 AM
She's hot.
Posted by: Stevie W | December 27, 2006 at 10:22 AM
Okay, but "who bells the cat?" I don't want to go anywhere near that thing.
Posted by: Clean Hands | December 27, 2006 at 10:22 AM
Excellent point, CH. Oh, and might I add, I got clean thru the holidays with not ONE visit to WalMart. I'm fairly certain they have a missing poster up with my photo, I haven't been in almost 4 months. WaH00!
Posted by: baligurl | December 27, 2006 at 10:23 AM
*shudders*
Oh Clean, I wouldn't wish WM undies on anyone. I don't think there is enough fabric softener in the world...
Posted by: estrogen centrale | December 27, 2006 at 10:24 AM
crossgirl, Sticky Nickel WBA excellent NFARB.
Posted by: KDF | December 27, 2006 at 10:24 AM
I dunno, Punkin. Do you feel up to it? My sewing isn't too good, but I can contact an vet pal for the shoulder length gloves.
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | December 27, 2006 at 10:24 AM
EC, they've gotta be more comfy than auto upholstery.
Posted by: baligurl | December 27, 2006 at 10:25 AM
ec, I doubt she'd notice the softness of the undies...that there dangly bit is probably numb by now.
Posted by: Siouxie | December 27, 2006 at 10:25 AM
Or at least has calluses.
Posted by: fivver | December 27, 2006 at 10:28 AM
Jeebus! She's got a dangly bit? I thought that was just Paris...
Posted by: Clean Hands | December 27, 2006 at 10:28 AM
OK question people....
Why did my next door neighbors decided to re-tile their roof while I'm on vacation?? HUH?? They started at 8 am this morning!! good thing I zonked out again...but sheeesh!!!!
They're banging and clankin...kinda what I'd love to be doing to Twatney's head.
Posted by: Siouxie | December 27, 2006 at 10:28 AM
Those of y'all naggin' about this subject fer a thread ... it merely occurred to moi ownself that it IS "Trash/Garbage Day" here in Beulahla, ND ... so ... mebbe Dave is thinkin' it's appropriate ... fer some of us, at least ...
Posted by: OtheU(manity) | December 27, 2006 at 10:28 AM
When they tried to contain Chernobyl, they covered it in several tons of concrete...
Posted by: Hammond Rye | December 27, 2006 at 10:29 AM
Actually, it is Lilo that has the dangly bit. keep your skanks straight, people!!!
Posted by: estrogen centrale | December 27, 2006 at 10:29 AM
Ah, Lilo...pr, as we refer to her during prayer at church, Dear Firecrotch.
Posted by: baligurl | December 27, 2006 at 10:31 AM
(erases 'p', tosses up an 'o')
Posted by: baligurl | December 27, 2006 at 10:31 AM
that would be 'decide'....need more cafe.
CH, if you noticed the picture...it's dangly. Reminds me of Borat when he said his wife's "vagin" hangs like the sleeve of a wizzard.
*snork*
Posted by: Siouxie | December 27, 2006 at 10:32 AM
*makes note to pay off the remainder to the roofers for doing the work, while Sioux is off*
Heh, heh, heh...
Posted by: estrogen centrale | December 27, 2006 at 10:32 AM
*snork @ baligurl*
Posted by: estrogen centrale | December 27, 2006 at 10:34 AM
Geeze, I musta missed that particular ambiguously-labeled link. Thank heavens.
Posted by: Clean Hands | December 27, 2006 at 10:36 AM
sheesh...ec! I'll have to get back at ya...hmmm...
Posted by: Siouxie | December 27, 2006 at 10:38 AM
Oh, You will. I have no doubt that you will.
Hey, your neighbors have probably been on the roofers appointment list, since post-Katrina, -Rita, or -Wilma.
Posted by: estrogen centrale | December 27, 2006 at 10:42 AM
Publicists everywhere are running and hiding, for fear they'll be chosen next to represent her.
Posted by: Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa | December 27, 2006 at 10:46 AM
Running and hiding? I would think they'd change careers.
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | December 27, 2006 at 10:48 AM
LOL Lisa...I'm thinking even Lizzie Grubman...the one that ran over a crowd of people is in hiding.
Posted by: Siouxie in her jammies | December 27, 2006 at 10:49 AM
Tammy-That too.
Posted by: Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa | December 27, 2006 at 10:53 AM
Hi Siouxie!
Posted by: Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa | December 27, 2006 at 10:55 AM
Lisa!! sorry...I'm in need of more coffee..as you can see I'm still in my jammies ;-)
Posted by: Siouxie in her jammies | December 27, 2006 at 11:01 AM
I've a 15 yr old fruitcake too!
He really gets pissed off when I call him that too... too bad.
Posted by: Kibby F5™ | December 27, 2006 at 11:11 AM
*only one in office today. Sitting alone. Reflecting on the past two holidays and wondering if I'M the crazy one or if it's EVERYONE else?*
*decides it's everyone else*
Posted by: Punkin Poo | December 27, 2006 at 11:28 AM
no, punkin, it's probably you.
NTTAWWT.
Posted by: southerngirl | December 27, 2006 at 11:35 AM
Check your hat, Punkin. If you're raising snakes there, then it's probably you. If not, then it's everyone else. If no hat, then the future is murky.
This has been your hat fortune.
Posted by: Clean Hands | December 27, 2006 at 11:37 AM
no hat, but I feel invisible snakes crawling on me....what does that mean?
Posted by: Punkin Poo | December 27, 2006 at 11:48 AM
You need to change your soap?
Posted by: Clean Hands | December 27, 2006 at 11:48 AM
I'm in the office today, as well. It's nice and quiet, and I have a new computer, so I'm having a pretty good day.
Posted by: baligurl | December 27, 2006 at 11:55 AM
Invisible Snakes wbagnfa ... um ... grunge band?
Posted by: OtheU(manity) | December 27, 2006 at 11:56 AM
Ok...to Tony Blair is vacationing here at the home of Robin Gibb. How exciting. right? A BeeGee reunion in the works??
Posted by: Siouxie | December 27, 2006 at 12:08 PM
Isn't F-Ked looking for a job? Let me rephrase that. Isn't he unemployed?
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | December 27, 2006 at 12:12 PM
Ooh Siouxie, let's go over to Star Island tonight. Maybe we can meet some Brit secret service agents!!!! I could get into an accent, be it King's English or Cockney twang...
Posted by: estrogen centrale | December 27, 2006 at 12:20 PM
Punkin & baligurl, I'm at work, too. *sighs* Lots of work and the developers are giving me fits.
However, I am being taken out momentarily for a much belated b-day lunch. Yipee!
Posted by: estrogen centrale | December 27, 2006 at 12:24 PM
Siouxie-Tony Blair as a BeeGee? I'd pay to see that.
Annie-Yeah, he's unemployed. Personally, I think it was just a "bad rap."
Posted by: Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa | December 27, 2006 at 12:25 PM
Annie, isn't he supposed to be wrestling or someting? Could swear I read that... here.
Posted by: estrogen centrale | December 27, 2006 at 12:28 PM
*snork*@ LBFF's 'bad rap.' Maybe F-ked should apply for this publicist position. He seems to be able to get plenty of publicity without doing anything.
How hard can this job be anyway? I'm not wearing underwear and I get plenty of publicity without any help at all.
Actually I think this was a typo. Twitney is really looking for someone to handle her (shudder) pubicity.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | December 27, 2006 at 12:36 PM
Annie-eeewwwww @ pubicity.
Posted by: Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa | December 27, 2006 at 12:40 PM
ec, I'm up for it! I love a british accent!! cockney too...hmmm...
um...Annie...he's already handled THAT.
Posted by: Siouxie | December 27, 2006 at 12:43 PM
Annie - no, please, no....WHY?????
Posted by: Punkin Poo | December 27, 2006 at 12:43 PM
*shudder* @ AWbh
Posted by: Clean Hands | December 27, 2006 at 12:43 PM
Let me add a double-*shudder* for Siouxie. Ew. Ew. Ew. Ew. Brain bleach, stat.
Posted by: Clean Hands | December 27, 2006 at 12:48 PM
Argggh
Posted by: Hammond Rye | December 27, 2006 at 12:49 PM
Ok, so who should apply for this job - Dennis Rodman? Rumsfeld? Bueller?
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | December 27, 2006 at 12:54 PM