Post a comment
Your Information
(Name is required. Email address will not be displayed with the comment.)
« Previous | Main | Next »
You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.
As a final step before posting your comment, enter the letters and numbers you see in the image below. This prevents automated programs from posting comments.
Having trouble reading this image? View an alternate.
Your Information
(Name is required. Email address will not be displayed with the comment.)
I guess he was udderly stupid.
Posted by: canyon | December 27, 2006 at 04:06 PM
brain surgeon material, or a new agent for ms.smears! he could smuggle a bunch of stuff in her, oh, sorry, never mind, just forget i said that.
Posted by: wickedwitch | December 27, 2006 at 04:07 PM
I've heard of a cattle car, but a cattle bus??
Posted by: ShadowKatmandu | December 27, 2006 at 04:08 PM
i think they should try to do that on the nyc subway and see how far they get.
Posted by: queensbee | December 27, 2006 at 04:11 PM
queensbee, they probably were inspired by that scene in "Madagascar"
How do you SNEAK cows into a passenger bus?
Posted by: qsman | December 27, 2006 at 04:13 PM
They've would've gone undetected, if not for a mischeveous bovine who pulled the emergency stop.
Posted by: Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa | December 27, 2006 at 04:16 PM
plus the cops heard them signing "1000 bottles of milk on the wall."
Posted by: Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa | December 27, 2006 at 04:17 PM
Whatta mooooooooroon!
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | December 27, 2006 at 04:18 PM
Rollin' Rollin' Rollin'
Keep those buses rollin'
Rollin' Rollin' Rollin' Rawhide!
Hell-bent for leather
Windy rain or weather
Wishin' my cow was by my side.
Don't try to understand 'em
Just ticket, count, and brand 'em
Soon they'll be riding by your side
So head 'em up, take a seat,
Take a seat, move 'em out,
Head 'em up, Take a seat Rawhide
Drive 'em in, let 'em out,
Drive 'em in, cut 'em out,
Drive 'em in Rawhide!
Posted by: Hammond Rye | December 27, 2006 at 04:26 PM
make that "They would've"
Posted by: Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa | December 27, 2006 at 04:27 PM
*snork* @ Hammond
Posted by: Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa | December 27, 2006 at 04:28 PM
When the cows noticed the leather seat covers, and Mildred recognized a unique scar that had belonged to a beloved bovine bud, she fainted. From that moment, a relentless restlessness settled over the group, and they could not be quieted or comforted until they were able to exit the bus.
Posted by: Hanna | December 27, 2006 at 04:37 PM
Maybe if he hadn't tried to get them on board for calf fare...
Thank you ladies and germs, you've been a beautiful audience. I'm here all week. Drive safely!
Posted by: Lairbo | December 27, 2006 at 04:38 PM
How do we know that the cow's weren't in charge and just "milking" the situation?
Posted by: canyon | December 27, 2006 at 04:41 PM
It was the horns sticking out of the windows that alerted the cops.
Posted by: Phil | December 27, 2006 at 04:42 PM
Rumor has it that some practical joker in the back moooned a cop.
Posted by: Hammond Rye | December 27, 2006 at 04:46 PM
Yo mooooma is so ugly she looked out the car window and got arrested for mooning.
Posted by: Hanna | December 27, 2006 at 04:48 PM
Talk about milking a story for all that it's worth...
Posted by: Hammond Rye | December 27, 2006 at 04:50 PM
Here in Oregon we have a dairy that promotes their cows as being "helpers." The key one being named "Harry." When questioned, they explained that he was really a cross-dresser whose feminine side just dominated him.
Posted by: Hanna | December 27, 2006 at 04:55 PM
Sir....step AWAY from the car...er COW, yeah, COW
Posted by: Jazzzz | December 27, 2006 at 05:02 PM
Gary Larson is spinning in his chair.
Posted by: Lairbo | December 27, 2006 at 05:04 PM
He probably would have gotten away with it, if instead of taking the cattle to Kaliningrad, he took the to Mooscow (utilizing both syllables, of course.)
What was he planning on doing with them at the port? Steal a container ship for them?
Posted by: estrogen centrale | December 27, 2006 at 05:04 PM
New bovine skin flick: "Oh, Bessie Does Odessa."
Posted by: estrogen centrale | December 27, 2006 at 05:08 PM
They failed to mention that the cows were driving.
Posted by: SippiFoxHunter | December 27, 2006 at 05:10 PM
That guy really was an idiot because I know whenever any of my cows come up missing the first place I check is the bus depot to see if they're hitting the road...
I got a couple of them that splurge and call a cab, but most take the bus....
Posted by: Clark Kent | December 27, 2006 at 05:14 PM
EC.....A milk container?
Posted by: Jazzzz | December 27, 2006 at 05:15 PM
Lairbo, you forgot, "Please take care of your servers."
Posted by: estrogen centrale | December 27, 2006 at 05:17 PM
Nope jazzzz, a real cattle car type container.
Posted by: estrogen centrale | December 27, 2006 at 05:18 PM
(hee hee hee) I get it EC, I'm just not very funny. *re-reads "Satire for Dummies"*
Posted by: Jazzzz | December 27, 2006 at 05:24 PM
Overheard on the bus:
STEER!!!
No, YOU steer!
Posted by: Stevie W | December 27, 2006 at 05:26 PM
Which dairy is that, Hanna? I must not watch enough television...
Posted by: Clean Hands | December 27, 2006 at 05:31 PM
Unidentified
Russian cow thief foiled again
What would Larson do?
Posted by: DustyKornphartz | December 27, 2006 at 05:34 PM
Jazzzz, your sense of humor is just fine. No worries!
Posted by: estrogen centrale | December 27, 2006 at 05:34 PM
*snork* @ StevieW
Posted by: Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa | December 27, 2006 at 05:47 PM
Oh, c'mon - give the guy a break! Personally, I would _never_ have thought to check the bus for stolen cattle. He was just unlucky, is all..
Posted by: MrToad | December 27, 2006 at 05:54 PM
Was it a Cattle-ac?
Posted by: Stevie W | December 27, 2006 at 06:00 PM
*snork*, steve w. Whoop! You are on again today. I guess you didn't stop sniffin' glue after all.
Posted by: Jazzzz | December 27, 2006 at 06:35 PM
*snork snork snork snork*
OW- I think I pulled somethin', Stevie, Lairbo, LBFF, Hammy, OK well, everyone.
Posted by: diverdowndoc | December 27, 2006 at 06:40 PM
Everybody's honkin' at me
I can't hear, my herd's a-strayin'
Holdin' my cattle all in line
--theme from "Midnight Cow Bus"
Posted by: Stevie W | December 27, 2006 at 06:48 PM
Was the cow perhaps licensed as a theraputic animal? We have those here in San Francisco.
Posted by: FogCityKitty | December 27, 2006 at 07:11 PM
"I left my herd....?"
Posted by: Stevie W | December 27, 2006 at 07:21 PM
I herd they were headed for .....MosCOW.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | December 27, 2006 at 07:34 PM
Or were they running for COW-ifornia?
Posted by: canyon | December 27, 2006 at 07:38 PM
Actually, I'm surprised they caught the thief. A little lipstick and those cows would easily pass for some Russian matrons. NTTAWWT.
And yes, canyon - happy cows are from Cow-lifornia.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | December 27, 2006 at 07:43 PM
CH, it was Darigold. I haven't heard a commercial about helping cows for a while, maybe enough of us protested. I actually talked to a PR person, and she didn't get it. Obviously did not grow up in cattle country, but she should know better even as a dairy cow rep.
These cows did not drive school buses, but they would help out in the garden, wash your car, sit the kids while you went to the grocery store, etc. It was a hoot, actually. Advertising agencies make too much money, they can afford reeeeal goooood druggggggs!
Posted by: Hanna | December 27, 2006 at 07:54 PM
Pizdyets! I get on autobus and yest Milk Run!
Posted by: CJruskie | December 27, 2006 at 08:02 PM
8 yr old daughter received a joke book for Xmas...(Note to self: smack brother upside the head & buy nephew a drum).....and has been telling me jokes continuously since the 25th. Here's an appropriate one:
Why did the cow cross the road?
It was the chickens day off.
Posted by: Zoodle | December 27, 2006 at 08:03 PM
Just today I get me some moo
(Too much, the Bovine Bus)
Get ‘em on the bus but can’t take ‘em through
(Too much, the Bovine Bus)
I’m so nervous, I just sit and smile
(Too much, the Bovine Bus)
Cows are gettin’ more and more hostile
(Too much, the Bovine Bus)
Curse you, copper, for nabbing me here
(Too much, the Bovine Bus)
You be the detector of my steers
(Too much, the Bovine Bus)
I can only sit and cuss
(Too much, the Bovine Bus)
Say goodbye to my Bovine Bus.
Posted by: Just Ducky | December 27, 2006 at 08:41 PM
*snork* @ JD!
Zoodle - Why did the cow cross the road>
To get to the bus stop on the other side.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | December 27, 2006 at 08:56 PM
Not tuned in to the cow bus situation. However, I just wanna know: I have a decent lap-top computer, which I bought for a considerable price, last year or maybe the end of the year before. I'm aghast because some internet sites I've tried to access have overlaping columns or something other. I admit I'm internet challenged, but, ya know -- I can't keep up with the Jones'.
Posted by: foggiest notion | December 27, 2006 at 09:05 PM
"...the unidentified man, who police said was one of two men likely involved in the theft..."
So the guy had an accowmplice?
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | December 27, 2006 at 09:08 PM
Unfortunately one of the heifers fell ill during the rescue and had to be evacuated via a Sick-cow-ski helicopter.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | December 27, 2006 at 09:11 PM
Did I mention I like cow posts? I can keep going like this until I'm completely decalfenaited.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | December 27, 2006 at 09:12 PM
The cows behaved professionally, their mother's were prod.
Posted by: Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa | December 27, 2006 at 09:24 PM
*snorks* at Annie!
Are you sure that you don't mean you like cowPOKES?
Posted by: Just Ducky | December 27, 2006 at 09:25 PM
XLNT song, JD!!
Posted by: Stevie W | December 27, 2006 at 09:35 PM
foggie-Maybe it's your default settings on the screen view??? Not sure--that's all I can offer.
*snork* @ annie and JD
Posted by: Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa | December 27, 2006 at 09:39 PM
*snork* at Lisa's "prod" mothers.
Thanks, Annie, stevie, and Lisa! The story just moooved me to compose. Some moosic. OK, I'll stop now.
Posted by: Just Ducky | December 27, 2006 at 09:47 PM
I'm wonderin' if them bovines all chipped in to pay the bus fare ...
Posted by: OtheU(manity) | December 27, 2006 at 10:50 PM
One buffalo nickel each probably would have done the trick...
Posted by: Stevie W | December 27, 2006 at 11:03 PM
GREAT song Ducky!! Just got home and catching up on the cowposts. Moooood Mooosic indeed.
Annie can go on till the cows come home...in a bus no less.
Posted by: Siouxie | December 27, 2006 at 11:06 PM
stevie, did you read my post about that new cd I got?? The remixed Beatles "Love"??
Posted by: Siouxie | December 27, 2006 at 11:16 PM
Maybe the bus was a hereford.
And, of course, if the driver needed to honk at anyone, he used the (wait for it) longhorn! Whoooo! Hey, but I wanna tell ya... I'm here all week. Try the veal -- it's fresh off the bus! -- and don't forget to tip your gurnsey.
Posted by: Lairbo | December 27, 2006 at 11:26 PM
Well done, Lairbo - it's about time somebody did that joke. I've been waiting for it for heifer.
The veal on the bus goes round & round,
round & round,
ground & round...
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | December 27, 2006 at 11:46 PM
And Annie, scrounging around the bottom of the barrel, comes up with a heretofore undiscovered gem. Zingo!
Sxi - I saw your post that you got the CD; was there another? I haven't seen the show yet, but for me it's all about the music. I got the CD shortly after it came out, and I have to say without exaggeration it was an epiphanic experience for me.
Posted by: Stevie W | December 27, 2006 at 11:56 PM
stevie, that was it! I agree that it's all about the music and I must say it is unreal. I haven't seen the show either although I'd love to see what they do to the music. I thought about you cuz I know you're like me when it comes to The Beatles!
Oh to be back in HS listening to this while under the influence...of um...mind altering cigarettes. Not that *I* ever did.
Annie, the only thing I can think of is..
Hoof let the cows out?
Hoof Hoof Hoof Hoof Hoof!
ok..I got nuffin!
Posted by: Siouxie | December 28, 2006 at 12:06 AM
...and the horn went, "Beef! Beef!"
Posted by: stevie w | December 28, 2006 at 12:06 AM
They were caught red-footed. You know, crimson and cloven.
Posted by: stevie w | December 28, 2006 at 12:07 AM
"...under the influence...of um...mind altering cigarettes."
A friend who saw it said it was like being on an acid trip. But with 6 or 8 speakers in each seat, plus the beyond-the-state-of-the-art sound system for the whole auditorium, for me it will still be all about the music.
Posted by: stevie w | December 28, 2006 at 12:11 AM
I wonder whether there was a fork in the road.
Posted by: stevie w | December 28, 2006 at 12:12 AM
*ditto*
There's no way I would have goten the CD if the original recordings weren't on there. You can't recreate that musical experience...at least not for someone who's loved the Beatles music for decades. Only George Martin could have pulled this off..IMHO
Posted by: Siouxie | December 28, 2006 at 12:22 AM
I gotta think this was a pretty rare occurence, since the rustlin' job wasn't very well done ... mebbe if the driver would've consulted an astrological medium, he could've tried it under the auspices of Taurus ... or p'haps if he'd've merely toro off down the road without stoppin' ... after all, he had a lot at steak ... considerin' how he'd pur-loined them critters ... I'm curious as to why he only had five of them ... I'd've thot that he'd have fileted up the bus ...
Posted by: OtheU(manity) | December 28, 2006 at 12:27 AM
And the award for the most cow puns used in a single post goes to....OtheU!!!
In a mooooving speech, OtheU thanked his cowsin Elsie and his calf-brother Bo Vine.
Posted by: Siouxie | December 28, 2006 at 12:33 AM
O the U...Wow! A veritable cascade of bovinity!
(Personally, I always prefer to take the bus, and leave the driving to udders)
Posted by: Betsy | December 28, 2006 at 12:39 AM
Awwww ... shucks ... t'wern't nothin' ... I wuz merely in a ruminantic state of mind, when this big Ox of a guy knocked on the door ... he wuz tryin' to corral a place to bed down fer the night, so I stalled him off until I could round up a spot next to the barn ... I did give a refreshin' glass of pasteurized milk before sendin' him on his way ... he wuz herdin' a bunch of little critters along with him, slappin' 'em (gently) on the rumps to keep 'em movin' ... he must've had a dozen little heifers he steered back into the minivan he wuz drivin' ... as they left, I heard him singin' Veal be seein' you ... and shanks vor de memories ...
I'm glad I wuz able to help him ... elsie I'd've had too much company fer the night ... If'n I'd've knowed he wuz in the area, I'd've found a good place to hide before he walked thru the gate ...
Posted by: OtheU(manity) | December 28, 2006 at 01:18 AM
Did they herd it through the Grapevine?
(California joke)
Posted by: Stevie W | December 28, 2006 at 01:27 AM
Been there ... but with my hearing loss, I din't herd much, stevie ...
Posted by: OtheU(manity) | December 28, 2006 at 01:31 AM
not much longer would you bovine...
make that Cowlifornia joke, stevie.
Posted by: Siouxie | December 28, 2006 at 01:34 AM
As much as I'd love to stay up for the many udderly amoozing cow puns...I must retire..I'm making myself *groan*
Sweet dreams fellow bloglits!!
*sets up the cowfee maker*
somebody stop me!!!!
*slaps self* nite nite!
Posted by: Siouxie | December 28, 2006 at 01:54 AM
Y'all are just too brilliant for me to keep up with. I liver for these pun-laden fenceposts, but I keep falling shortribs.
Foggy, have you recently upgraded your browser? I've seen that behavior on some sites with some of the newer browsers.
If you're running Internet Exploder (Internet Explorer), I'd try TiredFox (FireFox), or vice-versa, and see whether that unclogs the tubes for you.
Posted by: Clean Hands | December 28, 2006 at 02:39 AM
No use beating a dead cow.
Goodnight.
Posted by: Stevie W | December 28, 2006 at 02:43 AM
They would not calf gotten caught if they wouldn't have been cow-ards, and mooved to the back of the bus.
Can we ask the cops to look the udder way, or do they just cheese it?
Actual billboard in Sonoma: Clop-toe, thru the tulips....
Posted by: Pirateboy | December 28, 2006 at 02:51 AM
You know, I have to feel sorry for the poor busdriver.
How would YOU react?
-JP
Posted by: JP | December 28, 2006 at 09:34 PM
The real crime is that the crooks made the Angus cattle ride in the back of the bus.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | December 28, 2006 at 11:54 PM