WE BLAME GLOBAL WARMING

(Thanks to RussellMc)

Comments

[Siouxie]

It's got no male utilities," said Erickson, who lives in Minot. "It has teats ... it was pretty unusual."

*snork*

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

I guess he's not the first guy to be distracted by a rack (of antlers).

[Siouxie]

Teats for Tats

[magtured]

Man shoots doe with rack or antlers? Most people would have used a gun.

[Clean Hands]

But did it have doe-nuts?

[Meanie the Blue]

♬ Doe, a deer, a transgender deer ....

[nannie]

Doh!

[Jazzzz]

Doe...Doh' !!

[Jazzzz]

Nannie....great mids !!!

[Mr. Completely]

I dunno, I've seen some pretty good racks on a couple of dears in my time... I think one was even named Bambi.

What? Deer? Oh, well that's different.

Never mind.

[Siouxie]

Very endeering story...

LOL CH (gmta)

[blurk]

For the sake of Mary's kids I will refrain from commenting on racks and teats and other such things.

[blurkernomore (not really)]

...and because all the good lines are already taken.

[ScottMGS]

Yes, but what would the deer-carcass-lover in Wisconsin do with this one?

[blurkernomore (not really)]

Greeeeat - just what that weirdo from Wisconsin needs....handles.

[Meanie the Blue]

I always got the impression that when utilities merged, the customers were getting screwed. Turns out it was more than the customers.

[Annie Where-but-here]

agh! simul with Scott while I was cross-dressing!
I'm confused....hold me!

[ScottMGS]

No problem, Annie. ANY time!

[Siouxie]

Scott, he'd probably mount it....just sayin'

[Baron VonKlyff]

Six hunting partners with Erickson witnessed the doe with a 4-by-4 rack.

When did deer require all wheel drive?

[The Dread Pirate Scrooge]

It DOEsn't matter what utilities the deer has, and it DOEsn't matter if it has a nice rack. I AM willing to cook and eat it. I AM NOT willing to have sex with it.

[The Dread Pirate Scrooge]

It DOEs matter what utilities my dear has, and I do prefer a nice rack. I AM NOT willing to cook and eat my dear. I AM willing to...

[blurk]

*sympathetically shakes head*

Annie, annie, annie...poor confused woman.

[Siouxie]

*will also refrain from further commentary on teats and utilities and eating dears*

[Baron VonKlyff]

Woohoo... a simul with a mounting Siouxie. This must be my lucky day.

[The Dread Pirate Scrooge (not really)]

...clean the house for her.

[KDF]

*straightens rack*

[Meanie the Blue]

The buck stops where?

[Baron VonKlyff]

Two Simuls with Siouxie, and this time with her teats.

[Annie Where-but-here]

"Man shoots doe with rack of antlers"

I have never shot anything using a rack of antlers...what type of ammo do you load?

[ScottMGS]

Siouxie: *snork*

I'm thinking 4-point bazoomage usually showed up in green on the covers of '50s pulp science fiction magazines.

((Annie))

[nannie]

Jazzzz - we watch too much TV!
Tosses an "n" waaay up there.

Boy you people type fast!

[Cheryl Howard]

DPC--Good answer!

[ScottMGS]

... or the Olsen twins.

[Siouxie]

Thank you Baron. Very nicely done ;-)

At least I wasn't cross-dressing like Annie-over-there...

[Could Be Annie]

The Olsen twins are WAYYYYYYYYYY too anorexic. They need to eat more deaer.

[Annie Where-but-here]

Scott....you can let go now.
*cough*

[Cheryl Howard]

Did the hunters see the note from the deers gyneocologist?

[Annie Where-but-here]

Heyyyy, watch the x-dressing derogs - I look good in anything!

[Crash]

Nice Rack!

It had to be said.
She even had 'teats'.

[casey]

I've always wondered, but been too lazy to look it up....

Exactly how it "teat" pronounced? Is it "teet" or "tit"?

[Siouxie]

accckkkk who did just bump into?? cross-dressing Annie again??

[ScottMGS]

No, Siouxie, I had her but let her go.

[Cheryl Howard]

casey--teet

[Siouxie]

hmmm it was blurk-in-drag lol

[ScottMGS]

I guess he looks good in anything, too.

[casey]

OK. Now, who will entertain me with a poem or song with rhymage referring to teet?

[Annie Where-but-here]

Oh, my - a blurkie-drag sandwich!

[The Dread Pirate Scrooge]

*Tries to picture Annie looking good in this
*Tries to picture anyone looking good in that

[Siouxie]

wowsa...didn't notice that one, Annie!

and I already ATE (not teat or deer)

[blurk]

After a long night of making love, he notices a photo of another man on her night stand by the bed. He begins to worry. "Is this your husband?" he nervously asks. "No, silly," she replies, snuggling up to him. "Your boyfriend, then?" he continues. "No, not at all," she says, nibbling away at his ear. "Is it your dad or your brother?" he inquires, hoping to be reassured. "No, no, no!!!" she answers. Well, who the heck is he, then?" he demands. "That's me before the surgery."

[The Dread Pirate Scrooge]

One of them wasn't blurk.
And I only do drag for certain dears.

[casey]

throws up a NTTAWWT to Blurk's last post. There really is nothing wrong with that, right blurk?

[Siouxie]

yer just fulla jokes today ain't ya, blurk??

funny too!

[blurk]

casey, there's PLENTY wrong with that.

[Annie Where-but-here]

DPS - you just have to know how to make a costume look good.

[estrogen centrale]

Congratulations blurk - finally a joke that I hadn't heard!

[Clean Hands]

...Teach me to wander off for a bit. Siouxie, I'll give you credit for the doe-nuts comment - I ripped it off wholesale from your comment in the earlier thread.

(Still want my beignets.)

[Annie Where-but-here]

ack! So sorry - here's the costume link.

[blurk]

Okay, okay...last one:

John walks into his bedroom with a sheep under his arm and says: "Darling, this is the pig I have sex with when you have a headache." His wife is lying in bed and replies: "I think you'll find that's a sheep, you idiot." The man says: "I think you'll find I wasn't talking to you."

[Siouxie]

It's ok CH, you can borrow my doe-nuts anytime ;-)

wait...I mean..um..

beignets you say???

[Siouxie]

ROFLMAO!

THAT was good, blurk!!!

[Joe Simpson]

My daughter Jessica has a nice rack too!

[The Dread Pirate Scrooge]

SNORK at blurk

And now it's time for the Earworm of the Day™. Bob Rivers comes through for me again.

[ubetcha]

LOL blurk. That's the first one I hadn't heard and it's a beaut. Something about sheep jokes . . .

[Siouxie]

nice earworm there, Chris and funny as hell cartoon!

On that note, I am off!

[casey]

pretty good blurk, SOL (snork out loud)!

[Stevie W]

It's called a eunuchorn.

[estrogen centrale]

DPS - love the cartoon!!!!!

[Hanna]

There once was a doe with a rack,
Who worried when her horns turned black,
She polished up her teets,
Which became red as beets,
And a dirty coward shot her in the back.

[CJrun]

*snork* @ Hanna

Annie 3:42; wouldn't that be buck shot?

and, for Casey and the Blogettes:

We got the teats

See the blogettes walking down the street
Guys line up just watching all their teats
They don't know where they wanna go
But they're bouncin’ in time

They got the teats
They got the teats
Yeah
They got the teats!

Go-go music really makes us dance
Do the pony puts us in a trance
do the watusi just give us a chance
That's when we fall in line

We got the teats
We got the teats
We got the teats
Yeah
We got the teats!

[mudstuffin]

Here's a teat poem for casey:

i'm a complicated man, hard to please
cynical even, sometimes downright surly

my colleagues all feel a vague unease
at my approach, curmudgeonly? surely!

but one thing can scatter the clouds from my mind
make me happy as a baby with a clean dry behind

the teats of my young wife, so cute and so beguiling
i could nuzzle forever and never stop smiling

they suckled three children (four if you count me)
and remain firm as always (i'm not surprised that you doubt me)

they're miracle teats! the fountain of youth!
i am not making this up! i'm telling the truth!

i'm sorry, blog brothers, i don't mean to brag
you know the lord giveth, and also he taketh away

for the miracle teats belong to an extraordinary nag
who's menopausal, which explains my demeanor, okay?

[Gypsysoul66]

*a well-developed rack is unusual*

deer must not have access to good plastic surgeons

That is all.

[Gypsysoul66]

okay, one more comment ...

*SNORK* at all of you

[estrogen centrale]

blurk,
What do you call a West Virginian which a sheep under each arm?

A pimp!

[CJrun]

I bow to the Mudliness and try to scratch off my response to casey!

[Hanna]

Mud--Ever wonder why the big guy put teenagers and menopause in the same house at the same time? What in the world was HE thinking!

Not to be sacrilegious, but that is one of the questions that this inquiring mind would like an answer to.

[Siouxie]

LOL CJ and mud!!

YAY!! I'm home now ;P

[norawall]

Well, Dread Pirate, you can come over anytime. Do you do windows?

[Cheryl Howard]

Mud-- I think Mr. Howard would agree with you completely. The last time I was pregnant he off-handly mentioned he much preferred the smaller pre pregnany versions that he was allowed to touch.

I let him live despite this. He's a good man despite an occassional lapse in judgement.

[Siouxie]

Cheryl,

My ex would disagree. He loved it both times I nursed. Only times I had Punkin-sized teats.

*sigh*

[Clean Hands]

We guys don't understand why you gals would ever deny us the pleasure -- after all, we're always glad to have you touch us!

Fair is fair, right?

[casey]

BRAVO, BRAVO! Please form an orderly line while I pass these snorks out, no pushing or breaking line please!

Mud & CJ have made my day complete. Well, not really, I plan to complete this day with a whole bottle of wine (not whine), but you have definately enhanced it!

*meanders off whistling and muttering*

[Siouxie]

CH, who said he wasn't allowed??

[Mahatma Kane Jeeves]

Sometimes male humans will take on female affectations for unknown reasons as well . . .

[casey]

um, CJ, I would not recommend scratching that response. You might want to try removal by gently rubbing with a sanitized wet nap provided for your convenience.

I just love saying wet nap.

Wet nap wet nap wet nap wet nap.

[Cheryl Howard]

Sio--Oh me too. I think its the whole "look but don't touch" guideline. Growing up A cup-you just get used to not having obstacles(outside of dating).

snork @ CH

[casey]

EEEEeeeeeekkkk! My eyes, my eyes!

MKJ, why, I ask you why?

BTW mahatma, I've been meaning to tell you for several days now, it sure is nice seeing you around here again. I missed you. Until now.

[Siouxie]

casey, can I have a wet nap??

Cheryl, I'd just say to the hubby...enjoy 'em now cuz once I'm done nursing..they're back to normal!

[blurk]

Siouxie, if I'd been your hubby my response would've been, "Well, you'd better get rrreeeaaalll used to nursing then."

[CJrun]

MHK, I second casey's post.

casey, keep it short please; long wet naps can lead to wet dreams.

[Mahatma Kane Jeeves]

casey: why, indeed. Hope I can get to read y'all on the blog some more too . . .

[casey]

Ooops, so sorry, I didn't mention Hannah's brilliant submission to the snork-fest!

[Siouxie]

*glares @ blurk*

I'd have had to hurt him rrrrreeeaaalll bad then, blurk. As he always said size didn't matter.

hmm..course I told him that too...

[casey]

Well CJ, in that case, please accept this wet nap (tm thingy) for when you have a wet nap.

Next time y'all line up to receive all y'allses snorks, I'll remember to pass out wet naps too.

*pops the cork and signs off....*

[casey]

Oh, and one last thing before I go, if you guys would take the advice of the guy in the thread below this, you could just get pregnant yourself and grow your own bazoombages, allowing us female gender types to sleep, which is all we ever really want to do cuz after a woman has dropped a brat, they never get to sleep again. I've got two, I know this. Two brats AND two bazoombages. But no utilities. Except for BOB.

OK, now I'm REALLY signing off! hehehehehe

[Siouxie]

Have fun with BOB, casey! (thinks of wine and BOB) *eg*

I'm now waiting for my niece to show up and I'll be taking her, along with my youngest and her friend to the Blog's Strumpet. They are all HUGE fans also!!!

*hopes Dave has blurr-free vision*

[PeeJay]

Correct me if I'm wrong. I just logged on and did a quick review of this blog, and much to my dismay; was the word "hermaphrodite" never used?

[Mrs. Wheezer]

I blame K-FedEx's poor cd sales. Buy one and prevent female rackages!

[The Dread Pirate Scrooge]

Norwall - I do Linux, not Windoze.