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November 10, 2006


(Thanks to Bucket)

For the record, this blog has seen plenty of toilets that deserve to be feared.


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Loophobia! What will they think of next?

# 1

.. or is it #2?

Not too surprising, though. Have you SEEN the condition of most public, um, facilities?

Oh for crying out loud, clean up the public toilets or get a therapist & work it out! Jeez people!

We have exploding cows...next, exploding humans? Oh, wait, that's the other thread...

I told my shrink that I was a schitsophrenic. But he said sometimes a turd is only a turd.

The fair dinkums answer to Australia's problem.Ship them down under.See how simple life is?

"My name is Lou. How do you do?"

Paranoia wipes deep
Into your crack it will creep
It starts when you're always afraid
Poop outside, the cramps come
And eat you away...

You better PLOP
Hey, what's that sound?
Empty you gut
Unload the brown...

I have a fear of stepping in poo left by small dogs.
Do I have shi-tzu-phobia?

Gee, I wonder how the hell they go about curing a "bashful bowel"?

stevie - you've outdone yourself...not sure if that's a good thing, but kudoo-doos to you.

"We have to tackle this problem head on." Umm, wouldn't the other end make more sense? Just askin'.

My nephew wouldn't use any toilet but the one at his house. He'd drive 3 hours home to avoid it.

And he was going to enlist in the army. HA! Mass toilet facilities caused him to change his mind.

I just go under my desk at work...no problem

I have a phobia that I need help with. My biggest phobia is of seeing Uma Thurman naked. I need help in getting over this fear. Does anyone have any suggestions?

Aaaargh! Gimme gumball before I rant again!

You gotta go where you wanna go
Doo what you wanna doo
With whomevever you
Wanna wanna pee with

You mat sit or stand
But a public loo is just

*tosses a 'y' up to stevie's post so that he maY sit or stand*

Immersion therapy, 24.

There's a turkey-test video on consumptionjunction.com that would cure the bashful bowels in a heartbeat, butt I can't get to while I'm at work. Ok, I could butt that would be the last thing I do here.

Sit in the dark.Stick a rocket up your a$$.Light the fuse.This will refocus your attention.

Ty, Annie, but it's far from my best. (And thanks for the Y. Now when do I get the wherefore?)

I also suffer from late-night-post-anxiety - the tough decision about calling attention the next day to a late-night, hardly noticed post of which one is particularly proud, as you did the other day with a song parody. The delicate balance of modesty and the universal need for showing off obnoxiously. (Not you - me). Like my use of the word "poikilothermic" in a song parody last night going virtually unnoticed is this erudite group will probably lead me to either binge or purge, I just can't decide which 'cos I have trouble with decision-making...my shrink must love me.

"We say 'I'm going to the bathroom' or 'I'm going to powder my nose' because there is a taboo surrounding using the toilet."

Speaking for my own self personally, I don't WANT much more detail than that.


stevie - I saw your 'poiki'post and was in awe. Really. But I couldn't think of a good comeback. My humor runs hot & cold.

steve w. - whether or not the bloggers see a tail-end song, poem, etc... God sees....

i leave it to you to decide if that's a good thing or not...

"But I couldn't think of a good comeback."

Aw - a cookie once in a while would be nice.

Insom -

I have the habit of always checking tail-end posts, as you call them. Call me anal.

(I used to post on another humor board that had the nice feature that, when someone added a post, that topic would jump to the top of the list, so you could easily pick up the new stuff, even if the topic was a week old.)

"We say 'I'm going to the bathroom' or 'I'm going to powder my nose' because there is a taboo surrounding using the toilet."

Not in my house.
I proudly announce, "I'm going upstairs to take a dump. Anyone who needs to go after that is going to need a gas mask, because that room will not be fit for human habitation when I'm finished with it."

Co-incidentally, I was talking to a guy the other day who spent six months in a remote village in China. The only jakes was a hut with a communal line of holes. The pile underneath dated back to before the Cultural Revolution, apparently, but everyone sat in there for hours, chatting and smoking.
The guy's wife cut her food intake back so hard she didn't have to go until they got back to England....

"We have to tackle this problem head on." Don't some people call the bathroom "the head"?

I agree with Muffles "Going to the bathroom" is enough details for me.

"And routine situations requiring the provision of a urine sample fill some patients with terror."

Who else besides this writer thinks provision of a urine sample is routine. I mean, maybe once a year at the doctor's office, but not routinely. Do oyu routinely walk through the office and hear, "Anyone here who can give me some urine? The printer's out of ink and I need to mix a new batch?"

I hope the government is taking some form of action in the way of a brand new, huge and inefficient Ministry to deal with this terrible problem.

"Fear of Flushing," by Erica John.

...A campaign is being launched to raise awareness of the crappling impact of toilet phobia...

"But, no matter how funny we might find it, it's certainly no laughing matter"

You should all be ashamed of yourself.

*tee hee hee*

Bashful Bowels?, yeah could happen to anybody. I usually take them aside and tell them how much they mean to me.

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