CREEPING FASCISM
Now they want to take away our fundamental human right to wear only oats.
(Thanks to Peter Metrinko)
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Now they want to take away our fundamental human right to wear only oats.
(Thanks to Peter Metrinko)
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firs on a friday (effin dolpins)
Posted by: Chaz | September 08, 2006 at 08:44 AM
throws a "t" up to make it first
Posted by: Chaz | September 08, 2006 at 08:44 AM
What a night, mare!
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | September 08, 2006 at 08:50 AM
Oh, Mr. Ed - you cad!
Posted by: MOTW | September 08, 2006 at 08:50 AM
*smooch* to MtB
Posted by: MOTW | September 08, 2006 at 08:51 AM
if you're going to sow you wild oats, might as well sew them into an ensemble.
that is by golly, one of the funniest things i have ever, ever, ever read. i hope they took pictures!
Posted by: crossgirl | September 08, 2006 at 08:54 AM
Gee, Wilbur. You never told me you cared this way.
*Winks* to MOTW.
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | September 08, 2006 at 08:54 AM
"Nothing is better for thee than me . . ."
Posted by: Mahatma Kane Jeeves | September 08, 2006 at 08:59 AM
New: Honey Bunches of Oats with Nuts™ !
Posted by: MOTW | September 08, 2006 at 09:00 AM
i can't stop thinking of the horse mistaking something for a carrot....
Posted by: mudstuffin | September 08, 2006 at 09:02 AM
Even with the arrest, this worked out way better than his fantasy of letting wolves eat sausage links off his naked body.
Posted by: Christobol | September 08, 2006 at 09:09 AM
What's this story about?? I can't seem to stop looking at the creepily perky newsteam...
Posted by: Siouxie | September 08, 2006 at 09:23 AM
sheesh..ok read it!
what a marooon! too bad his fantasy wasn't covering himself in tar and rolling around in feathers and have angry birds peck at him...
Posted by: Siouxie | September 08, 2006 at 09:26 AM
Grown men wearing diapers, squirrels stealing flags, freaks rolling in oats and letting horses lick them.... what is this world coming to I ask? It's all too depressing.
Is it too early for margaritas?
Posted by: casey | September 08, 2006 at 09:37 AM
"Alfred Thomas Steven was cited and released for trespassing, animal cruelty and sexually assaulting an animal."
It's all in the parenting. That's what his loser mom and dad get for their inept attempt to name him after the Chipmunks.
Posted by: Stevie W | September 08, 2006 at 09:41 AM
It's the right thing to do!
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | September 08, 2006 at 09:47 AM
Well olive oil and oats is supposed to be good for your skin. But this guy did it all wrong. Horse spit reverses the effect.
(affect?? I always get that wrong.)
Posted by: Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa | September 08, 2006 at 09:58 AM
Problem is, horses don't just lick, they bite. hard.
an' I didn't have to do something stupid like this idiot to figure that one out. He coulda, shoulda lost his danglies.
Posted by: Wyo Cowboy | September 08, 2006 at 09:59 AM
casey: where you at? I'm buyin'.
Posted by: mudstuffin | September 08, 2006 at 09:59 AM
I'd like a cosmo, mud..thank you
Posted by: Siouxie | September 08, 2006 at 10:19 AM
casey, it's never too early to roll yourself in margarita salt.
Posted by: crossgirl | September 08, 2006 at 10:23 AM
sexually assaulting an animal?
OK, who was licking who? or should that be whom?
whom was licking whom?
whom was licking who?
*sigh*
never mind
Posted by: TCK | September 08, 2006 at 11:09 AM
got a little excited there, TCK????
Posted by: Siouxie | September 08, 2006 at 11:16 AM
Rolling in oats at age 69? Betcha he's done this before. He's gotta be, you know, a cereal offender.
Posted by: Stevie W | September 08, 2006 at 11:26 AM
*Puts another SNORK up for stevie w*
Posted by: Meanie the Blue | September 08, 2006 at 11:30 AM
stevie, you don't need another *snork* from me...I crack up at just about anything you come up with ...
so consider yourself eternally *snorked* :P
Posted by: Siouxie | September 08, 2006 at 11:36 AM
Eternally? Thanks, but I dunno. I think after four hours I'm supposed to see a doctor.
(ty both)
Posted by: Stevie W | September 08, 2006 at 11:43 AM
at first i thought it said "Alfred THomas Steven was EXcited," but I guess he was that too. Gross.
Posted by: Betsi | September 08, 2006 at 11:57 AM
PS is this fetish day on the blog?
Posted by: Betsi | September 08, 2006 at 11:58 AM
My sexual fantacies involve sex, am I wierd?
Posted by: MrBill | September 08, 2006 at 12:26 PM
Sexually assaulting an animal? All he did wuz let the horses lick him all over his ... um ... nevermind ...
Posted by: O. the U(manity) | September 08, 2006 at 05:14 PM
TCK - A neat trick I learned the other day for the Whom/Who quandry is to substitute "him" for whom and "he" for who - then you get "He was licking him?" so the answer is "Who was licking whom?"
When I learned this, after completion of gradaute school I might add, I knew it would come in very handy someday, such as when discussing the sexual abuse of equines with body parts covered in oats.
Posted by: Jacki | September 08, 2006 at 08:12 PM
Wyo,
Yup, they bite. I mean, mine doesn't, because a) she's sweet and b) I knew how to teach her not to do that. But if she met a human oatsicle, she would probably get overly enthusiastic and...ouch.
Also: A group of horses in a pasture will typically fight over food, and if some stupid human gets caught in the crossfire, well, too bad. This sicko is lucky he didn't get clobbered.
I suspect the "sexual assault" charge may have had to do with other details which we were spared, either by the writer, the editor, or the cops. I'm guessing it was the cops, and they have my gratitude.
Mare
Posted by: Mare Imbrium | September 08, 2006 at 10:10 PM
Oats, hmm? Did anybody get that horse's phone number?
Horace J. Digby
Posted by: Horace J. Digby | September 09, 2006 at 07:51 AM