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September 08, 2006


Now they want to take away our fundamental human right to wear only oats.

(Thanks to Peter Metrinko)


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firs on a friday (effin dolpins)

throws a "t" up to make it first

What a night, mare!

Oh, Mr. Ed - you cad!

*smooch* to MtB

if you're going to sow you wild oats, might as well sew them into an ensemble.

that is by golly, one of the funniest things i have ever, ever, ever read. i hope they took pictures!

Gee, Wilbur. You never told me you cared this way.

*Winks* to MOTW.

"Nothing is better for thee than me . . ."

New: Honey Bunches of Oats with Nuts™ !

i can't stop thinking of the horse mistaking something for a carrot....

Even with the arrest, this worked out way better than his fantasy of letting wolves eat sausage links off his naked body.

What's this story about?? I can't seem to stop looking at the creepily perky newsteam...

sheesh..ok read it!

what a marooon! too bad his fantasy wasn't covering himself in tar and rolling around in feathers and have angry birds peck at him...

Grown men wearing diapers, squirrels stealing flags, freaks rolling in oats and letting horses lick them.... what is this world coming to I ask? It's all too depressing.

Is it too early for margaritas?

"Alfred Thomas Steven was cited and released for trespassing, animal cruelty and sexually assaulting an animal."

It's all in the parenting. That's what his loser mom and dad get for their inept attempt to name him after the Chipmunks.

It's the right thing to do!

Well olive oil and oats is supposed to be good for your skin. But this guy did it all wrong. Horse spit reverses the effect.

(affect?? I always get that wrong.)

Problem is, horses don't just lick, they bite. hard.

an' I didn't have to do something stupid like this idiot to figure that one out. He coulda, shoulda lost his danglies.

casey: where you at? I'm buyin'.

I'd like a cosmo, mud..thank you

casey, it's never too early to roll yourself in margarita salt.

sexually assaulting an animal?

OK, who was licking who? or should that be whom?

whom was licking whom?

whom was licking who?


never mind

got a little excited there, TCK????

Rolling in oats at age 69? Betcha he's done this before. He's gotta be, you know, a cereal offender.

*Puts another SNORK up for stevie w*

stevie, you don't need another *snork* from me...I crack up at just about anything you come up with ...

so consider yourself eternally *snorked* :P

Eternally? Thanks, but I dunno. I think after four hours I'm supposed to see a doctor.

(ty both)

at first i thought it said "Alfred THomas Steven was EXcited," but I guess he was that too. Gross.

PS is this fetish day on the blog?

My sexual fantacies involve sex, am I wierd?

Sexually assaulting an animal? All he did wuz let the horses lick him all over his ... um ... nevermind ...

TCK - A neat trick I learned the other day for the Whom/Who quandry is to substitute "him" for whom and "he" for who - then you get "He was licking him?" so the answer is "Who was licking whom?"

When I learned this, after completion of gradaute school I might add, I knew it would come in very handy someday, such as when discussing the sexual abuse of equines with body parts covered in oats.


Yup, they bite. I mean, mine doesn't, because a) she's sweet and b) I knew how to teach her not to do that. But if she met a human oatsicle, she would probably get overly enthusiastic and...ouch.

Also: A group of horses in a pasture will typically fight over food, and if some stupid human gets caught in the crossfire, well, too bad. This sicko is lucky he didn't get clobbered.

I suspect the "sexual assault" charge may have had to do with other details which we were spared, either by the writer, the editor, or the cops. I'm guessing it was the cops, and they have my gratitude.


Oats, hmm? Did anybody get that horse's phone number?

Horace J. Digby

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