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August 31, 2006


But people keep sending it in, so in an effort to make them stop, we're linking to it. That is the kind of responsible fact-checking that makes this blog the trusted news source that this blog is.


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I'm pretending you never posted this crap.

*proud to NOT be one who sent it it*

Oh, come on! All kid's sh!t looks like that!

And now the obvious:

You gotta be sh!ttin' me.

I think it's real.... it's on EBAY.

No way that came from an infant.

Looks more like Snakes on a Plate.

I dunno...that seems awful big for an infant...

as a bit of a pro on infants (having had 2 and babysat too many to count), infant poop is almost never solid....this is more like toddler poop

Suri’s bronzed poop is purportedly cast from the excretion of her first solid meal.

What the HE!! did she eat???

you know, i saw that last nite on Countdown with Keith O, and you could hear the crew and others just laughing in the background.

its a replica poop.


I would never pay that much for somthin' that ain't worth sh!t...

So does Katie prefer the smell of this to other pop-art sculpture? Or is pop-art an abomination unto holy father ElRon?

(Then again, isn't pop-art an abomination anyway? ;)

Throws an "e" up there.

here here, 24, from a veteran father. On the other hand, this is America. If you're able to con some idiot outa $5100 for a turd, more power to ya. I just hope they declare it on their income tax.

*Climbs into handbasket*

pop-art or poop-art? You decide

why wasn't the baby wearing a diaper?

the goose that layed the golden egg never saw this coming.

I agree, Wyo. I'd love to know what absolute MORON pays for this. Even Twitney's moldy sammich is better than this uh..crap!

It must be the straight poop.

All I can picture is Mike Myers from the first Austin Powers movie.

"Who does number 2 work for?!?!?!"

Yet another example of the crappy state of the "art" world in the modern age.

Now what I wanna know is whether this, um, person contacted the proud parents ahead of time and requested that they save the object in question for this purpose. 'Cause, I know a lot of parents and none of them have ever, to my knowledge, said, "Gee, I'd just LOVE to have Baby's First Turd as a keepsake!" Never. However, none of these people are famous lunatics, either.

I'm posting from Minneapolis, where I intend to move, partly because Minneapolis (unlike Florida) has places like THIS:



The same artist who did the horrifying sculpture of Twitney, and the traumatizing bust of Hillary (for the Museum of Sex, no less), I can't tell if he's going up or down in appalling studies.

(Cough, cough) As something of an amateur 'poopologist' (five children), I concur with those who cast suspicion on the *@ss*ertion that this is infant poop.

And I, too, must shake my head and wonder where the china hutch is that's going to house this piece of...'art'. Yikes.

Let's start drafting the necessary Constitutional Amendment now for Suri, so that when she's old enough to realize what morons her parents are, she will we able to legally dispatch them.

I second the motion, Meanie


I know I'm startin' to sound like a broken record but...
Like my daddy always said: Some people just need killin'.

blurk - who did you have in mind? mom, dad, the person who took the poop, the person who bronzed it or the person selling it?

OH! For the love of......(sigh) And, It's probably from the dog.

Personally, I would shoot the idiot that bought it

Just the adults involved. It ain't the kid's fault they're morons.

"A bronzed cast of baby's first poop can be a meaningful memento for the family," gallery director David Kesting said, adding that he hoped the work would attract bids of up to 25 or 30,000 dollars.

This is shoddy reporting. Obviously they meant to say "..David Kesting said, between roars or laughter, adding that...dollars, before he collapsed to the ground in a fit of mirth, unable to utter another intelligible phrase." The editor should have caught this.

Somehow, I doubt that the person resposible for the Britney-birthing sculpture actually has access to celebrity-offspring excrement.

someone needs to combine the poop statue with this classic product

There is no way this real. This the Clifford Irving of poops.

Would it surprise anyone if I said I have the product Bones linked to?

His song "I'm So Close to Cathy" was so good though.

I'm proud to say i sent this in. Now as to why i'm proud. Probably some sort of dementia.

no, blurk....if anyone would have this, it would be you.

Definitely not from an newborn, and the "artists" must not have changed any infant diapers or they would know that. Just making a name for themselves, and a healthy ebay account.

blurk, please please please tell me you did not buy that for yourself!

Hey I like my big mouth bass singing on the wall.

First of all, the article said the top bid was $41, not $25,000.

I can't help wondering if this really came out of the artist (sic)'s Twitney sculpture.

Yes, let's all bronze baby's first poo, cause lord knows there may only be, like, 500,000 more in the next year!

Now, if we could bottle baby's first smile, I'd buy it.

Ok I will admit I am one of the googolians of people who sent this in and dang it I am proud.

I did not buy it for myself. My troops bought it for me. It's on my office wall.

*snork* @ Jeff Meyerson

I am of the "Definitely not infant poo" school of thought. And I can't believe I'm thinking about it.

That "school" wouldn't be Ohio-Wesleyan U, would it?

this blog has turned out some crap before but never Bronze Crap - this stoops to an all time load

Hey I have Suri's first Boogers. I dipped them in gold and made them into a necklace. Anyone want to buy it?

Oh please. Everyone knows Tom and Katie's baby would have pooped gold.

Is there a size limit on these?

I have two Labradogs....

Anybody besides me thinking its strange that they release an image of her poo before they release an actual photograph of the child? (wondering if poo is better looking than the child?)

I also agree - no 3 or 4 month old's poo looks like that - whomever buys that is an idiot.

And those are the nominees for most scatalogical references in a single thread. May I have the envelope, please?

you're all forgetting the worst part! to cast an object in bronze you first make a cast around the original object and then you do a 'burn out'. so for this piece you would be burning poop... why not just put it in a bag like everyone else...

From the Q&A section of EBay, where the current bid is $7000:
... Please note there will be no authentication from the Cruise family as the item was made as an artist rendering of what Suri Cruises' first solid meal waste would look like. Thank you for your intrest and good luck bidding!

43 bids with the current one at $7000. Only 6 days to go until someone is the winner of this "fabulous" piece of art! I just don't think I can wait that long to learn who wins.

Wait...was that the Virgin Mary reflected in that poop?


Thank you. That settles it, then: the actual, original object originated from an actual, original dog.

Case closed.

And hopefully dropped into a tub of wet concrete, allowed to set, and then dropped into the deepest possible abyss.


The gallery asserts its bronzed baby poop reinforces claims...that Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes have a healthy baby.

"OF course there's nothing wrong with our baby! Look at this artist's bronze rendering of his conception of her excrement following her purported first solid meal!"

"Oh...Ok, then."

*SW from DCFS slaps clipboard shut, and closes out another case*

If nobody buys it, Tom will make the rounds of your living rooms and jump up and down on your sofas until soembody does.

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