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August 23, 2006

CSI ST. ELMO

Moose DNA!

(Which would be a good name for a rock band)

(Thanks to Claire Martin)

Comments

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Wow. The bear saved the day?

And, I have my third FIRST for the day! Whew! I'm exhausted.

Some days you get the bear, some days the bear gets you.

I have many questions, almost none having to do with the topic:

1. Who the he!! is Claire Martin?
2. Does she ever comment on the threads?
3. What is she blackmailing Dave with to get multi-posted?
4. What is up with her obsession with animals?

Okay, I'm calm now

*taking deep breaths*

Given the DNA analysis, does the amount of the fine even cover the costs of the investigation? And for a moose?

*sits in stunned silence*

Oh, kitten. It's clear that you're new to the blog. Clair Martin, if she even exists, never comments on the blog. However, the blog posts every single damn thing she sends in. She obviously has no life. We revere her.

"Hey, Rocky, watch me pull a double helix out of my hat!"

"How many times do I have to tell you? Everyone knows me as Nancy!"

"Whoops, wrong squirrel."

$11,000 dollars for killing what amounts to a giant walking hamburger? Was it out of season? He had a permit to kill elk. Maybe he couldn't tell the difference.

You stole my bit, Stevie...I wanted to say something about how with moose gone, squirrel will be next, but never mind.

Can't think of any jokes to make about St. Elmo's Fire, either.

Dammit.

Some times you eat the bear. Sometimes the bear eats you. But remember, always dress for the hunt.

Adventurers Club Motto. Pleasure Island Disney.

Where was squirrel in all this? I bet it was a frameup.

Next on Hell's Kitchen:
Poached Moose presented with a mild deyennaisse sauce, garnished with bear claw.

*snork* Vic's giant walking hamburger

you go, girl. Forensic science puts a whole new wheel on the poaching wagon.

*goes back to reading, 101 Clever Ways to Dispose of Radio Collars.*

"A search of a storage unit held by Pedraza turned up a moose pelt and photos that placed him at the scene."

Moosey Van Pelt? Isn't that Charlie Brown's nemesis?

I think they got the wrong guy, Boris and Natasha just finally caught up with him.

(Insert inappropriate and unfunny Yakov Smirnoff joke here)

Thank you, I'll be here all week.

I dead the moose today, oh boy...

Y'all know that the w after stevie's name is for worm.

Thanks for nothin', buddy.

Kitten - This Claire Martin (there must be more) has been getting posted here for years. I surmise she has a connection to Dave and/or Judi via the newspaper biz.

What a coincidence; I dead the alarm clock today.

A DNA test confirmed they belonged to the moose whose skull was found. Pedraza then pleaded guilty.

dont ya wish ALL criminals would plead guilty when they ARE guilty and know it...

I think, if you plead NOT guilty, and you are found 100% guilty and wasting the courts time...the punishment should be twice as stiff...

Chaz, I like the way you think. Not yet sure what to think about jerks like Karr (plead guilty: Jon Benet Ramsey, but most likely ain't). Can we only convict one person for each crime? Maybe we could get rid of M. Jackson once and for all.

sorry, just ramblin', BOT

Claire is one of a growing group of obituary writers who are writing death notices about interesting and unsung people rather than just the famous few who get all the play.....

It's unbearable.

Chaz,

"I think, if you plead NOT guilty, and you are found 100% guilty and wasting the courts time...the punishment should be twice as stiff..."

I disagree, but only slightly.

The way our court system is set up you have to plead "Not Guilty" if you want to present your case. If it turns out they (judge / jury) don't buy your argument / version of how things went then they find you guilty. But that doesn't mean you were just wasting the court's time.

However, for those cases where you are just wasting time and hoping to find some way to slide out on a technicality (or idiot juror) then yes, I think you should get at least a double whammy.

And maybe a moose (probably as a cell mate but I'm not that picky)

The informant was really "Edgar" from 24 in a bear suit.

hey what's up hope everyone is haveing fun in life!!

Word, Richard.

Pogo -- you have outed the famed Claire Martin! Well done. I have been sitting on that knowledge since Ted spilled it to me at a luncheon noted hereabouts for a certain sprinting author's fleeting appearance. I disqualified myself from said outing because Ted was frighteningly unduly enchanted by my wife and, okay, it was too easy.

So you win Dave's favorite prize! (Outside of that Pulitzer one, I'll assume...)

Psst, Claire -- you're overdue, dear...

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