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July 26, 2006


Ridley and I are at the San Francisco airport, preparing to go to St. Louis, where we will see if Ridley has electricity, or what. I know I have asked this question before, but I would still like to know why it is that people in otherwise quiet airport waiting areas believe that they must talk VERY LOUD INTO THEIR CELL PHONES.


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"Strumpeting in the dark....:

If people didnt talk loud into cell phones then the world would be a better place and will we can not let that happen.

Dave, I suggest you and Ridley TALK VERY LOUD to your CHEEZITS.

Obviously because they are VERY important and want everyone to know...

What would happen if you answered them, like as if they were talking to you? Would that annoy them enough to make them stop?

It's so you know how important they think they are. That's pretty much it.

I'm not suggesting you do it, I just think it would be funny. (Like maybe an SNL skit.)

Dave, write down all the personal info they talk about and hand it to them. That should freak them out.

So that they can be sure of receiving a complementary "Certified Dweeb" sticker placed on their backs?

What I do is say to Ridley in a loudish voice, "Can you hear that guy OK? Should I ask him to talk louder?" This causes Ridley to smile and sometimes turn red, but it has no effect whatsoever on the loud cell-phone talker.

ooh.. great minds, 24-aholic!
I hate loud phone talkers... and I hate the new generation cellphones with the "walkie talkie feature". I spent an entire bus trip listening to a couple of 5 year olds... um, I mean teenagers talk to each other, but the one on my bus was using her "walkie talkie", so that you got to hear BOTH ends of a loud private conversation about something incredibly dreary, but oh-so-important when you're a teen.

start a fake conversation about how much your love...say....your speedo and cant wait to wear it when you get home...

or something similar so the person the loud phoen talker is talking to can hear!!


I hate when people talk really loudly into their GIANT PINK TESTICLES!!!!

See then, you're bold enough. You could pull it off.

you're in SAN FRANCISCO? (sorry... i haven't been keeping up with the likes of you. or the likes of anyone else, for that matter. no wonder no one likes me.)

Dave - Same thing happened when I was at Logan waiting (which is what you do ALOT of at Logan) for my flight to the Vineyard. I heard all about "that bastard-son-of-a-bitch" and all his "screwing around" and how the lawyer was gonna "rake his ass over the coals". And she was with her 8 or 9 yr old daughter. Nice.

My solution? Taser 'em. Your fellow travelers will thank you.

I bet there's no one listening at the other end...


At least it's not this bad...

Will any bloglits be going to the St Louis strump? Could we connect even though I'm just a blurker?

The strump location does have electricity.

Dave, you need the InsolentWench and me around. We do the same thing you do, but we BOTH do it. "WHAT? I'M HAVING TROUBLE HEARING YOU OVER THE GUY ON THE PHONE!"

Dave - My favorite is when you're in a large group of people and someone's phone rings.....37 people all check their pockets at once....I giggle.

Dave, I feel it fair to warn you before you come to St. Louis;

FEMA just showed up.


Al Sharpton has arrived demanding why it's taken so long.

You've been warned.

*weeps for Sly*
Bad news indeed, Sly.

*embarrassed that she messed up her post when editing*

Please, don't tell Mr. Language Person.

um...shouldn't it be "they must talk very loudLY"?

What Dave failed to mention is that the person near him was saying, "Doris, guess who's right here next to me. No...no...no...you'll never guess...no...no...ok, it's Ridley Scott! Yes! Do you believe it? Right here, next to me! He's with some guy with shiny hair. I think he's his driver."

***SNORK*** @ AWBH

Hey, it could be worse.


You could start a conversation with Ridley that was sufficiently loud to intrude on Mr LoudTalker's conversation. It could go something like this..

D: So then, you remember I was telling you about the night in Shreveport with three hookers, a donkey and a pint of Jack Daniels?
R: Yes, yes... did you ever get the test results back?
D: Yeah, man.. they came in last week. The green fungus they found was an infectious bug that usually only shows up if you're living in Africa. They said they'd never seen it in the US before, and they wanted to take photos, because the way it was spreading, it looked a bit like the Virgin Mary. They said I could probably auction the photos on eBay and make a LOT of money!
R: You'd cut me in on the profits, wouldn't you? After all I did introduce you to the third hooker and the donkey.

Kafaleni, so you liked Clerks II too?

I am going to be at the Strumpeting in St Louis. I am so excited to be able to attend.
Sly, will you be there. It will lovely to meet you in person.

Dave and all the blotlits: All of your suggestions are fine but here's the one surefire way to...wait a minute, I gotta take this call...


I'm sorry, what were we talking about?

uh...blurker?? I doubt it could be anything more interesting than beavers...

Okay, beavers bring to mind big, nasty teeth and OWWWWWWWW

vanity, yup. So will Sharon-share-alike.

***pouting at all the bloggers who have been meeting lately***

what's wrong with Ohio?

24 --- um, the Dayton OHIO strumpeting last weekend got the most pictures on the blog.

yeah, have you ever realized your error IMMEDIATELY after hitting post? In my defense, I was at my HS reunion and couldn't have made it anyway...

have you ever realized your error IMMEDIATELY after hitting post?

I think I wrote the book on that.

Awesome. Sly and Sharon, see you there. Unless anyone wants to make plans for drinks before the event?
I would organize it, but I am still trying to find things since I am still new in town. Besides, my organizational skills are lacking too.

And the book was dedicated to me.

Sly and Sharon with Dave and Ridley!?!?!?!

pack up the babies and all the old ladies.....

Lind, Sly, et al -- I am a St. Louis lurker who plans to be there, too. With my lurking children. Any suggestions on how early to show up?

FYI: I tried to see Dave a couple of years back when he came to Webster University here. The place filled up so fast I couldn't get in -- even though I teach there.


The event starts at 7:00, and the doors open at 6:00. My sister, who works there, says they're expecting "a big turnout," whatever that means. I suspect it means,"Be there by 6:00." But that's just MHO.


I want to be there by 6 at least. Vanity, drinks beforehand won't work for me with getting off work at 5:00 and then there from downtown.

Dave, stop SHOUTING!

Cell phones don't have audio feedback like regular phones. People using cell phones must talk louder to hear what they are saying at the same level as they do on a regular phone. Its human nature, thats why it happens everywhere....

Somebody, and I am not naming names, needs to write a book on cell phone etiquette...

Can you hear me now?

No ... that's the guy across the terminal ...

Not only in airports; THEY talk LOUDLY on quiet getaway beaches!! "YES, I'M SITTING HERE RELAXING ON THE BEACH. YES, BEAUTIFUL TRANQUIL SPOT...YAK, YAK, YAK,...." Send a postcard or a quiet e-mail.

Sly and Sharon,
Are you related to the family Stone?

My new announce is loud mobile phone talkers. The other day on the bus I was having or trying to have a conversation. The guy sitting across from us was talking obnoxiously loud on his phone to his girlfriend. He was making plans for his weekend away with her and asking her very personal questions. I gave him the glaring eyes look, but he just kept on talking. After a half hour of his jabbering, I snapped. I said, she'll probably dump you after this weekend. He looked surprised an rather dumbstruck.

the thing is, that if you yell at the loud talkers, you'll probably be the one that the police question. amtrak keeps claiming it will be having a 'quiet car' no phones allowed. hasnt happened yet. maybe they should do the opposite- have an all phone car, let them all duke it out while the rest of us sit in peace and quiet bliss. some of your solutions are great. all i could come up with is: SHUT the FFFF up you moron. hmm. not a good choice.

Embarrassing personal sounds in the vicinity of the loud talker can work wonders.

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