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July 22, 2006


We made it from Dayton back to Chicago (where we began our day) only to be informed by United Flight Delays Airlines that the airplane that was supposed to take us to San Francisco is still at LaGuardia Airport in New York City, and is in no big hurry to leave. So we may be spending several days here in in O'Hare Airport. Stop by if you'd like us to sign a book. Bring the kids!

We'll be fine, because we have plenty to eat.
We thank the blogsterette known as Bumble for bringing about 47 bags of Cheez-Its to our event in Dayton. At the time we viewed it as a humorous gesture. We now realize that it may save our lives. Other passengers in the waiting lounge have formed a circle around us and sometimes make hungry lunges in our direction, but they will NOT GET OUR CHEEZ-ITS.

UPDATE: Our plane is here. Let me repeat that in italics: Our plane is here.


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I don;t blame you, Dave. I won;t feel bad if you give them a kolacky.


You cannot survive on cheezits.....you also need beer

; see ;; why ;; I ;; always use ;; preview??


Simulpost with Wessonality!! Well, it should be ladies First.

Hmmm... I'm supposed to leave Monday for Dallas, which means I'll see you Tuesday, when my flight gets redirected.
*must remember to bring beer*

Ooooohhhh.... Trapped in O'H*ll O'Hare..... Soooo sorry, 'specially after being shoved in an abandoned shop in Dayton for the afternoon!

But seriously, it was great to meet you guys. Good lick with the rest of your tour!

Does O'Hare have laundry facilities? Just check your pockets for cheez-Its (tm thingie) before you wash!

Yay Bumble for the Cheez-Its O Life.

Jazzzz, it's my first first, and a simulpost even.

(Sigh - basking in the newness of it all}

Where's that check-off list I had this morning...?

Oh, and thanks to Bumble for saving Dave and Ridley from starvation. Never underestimate the power of a bloglit.

*grumble grumble*


Wessonality, was it good for you too?

We got your meaning, Bicket.

It's raining at O'Hare here in Chicago. Lord knows how long the guys will be stuck at the airport.

(Note to self -- go rent THIS)

Save the cheezits!!!

Bucket ~ I like it better the first way.

Jazzzz ~ oh, yeah!

Wessonality! Good choice, but I think Dave might need this.

You're welcome. There are Snickers in there, too. Enjoy. ;-)

Bucket....We didn't know if that was a personal message or what. So, we just sat on our hands.

"Good lick"

Hmmm....methinks Bucket knows something more than he/she is telling??

A friend of mine once said that O'Hare is the Purgatory of airports. You're stuck there, but at least it's clean. It's not Hell.

Delayed *snork* @ Meanie

Oh, you guys make this too easy!

Ridley: "Where's your other hand?" Dave: "Between two pillows." Ridley: "Those aren't pillows!" Both: "AAAHHHHHHHHHHHH! (much shivering and grimacing by both)"

Jeff, at least yours is in English. In my haste to post, I didn't notice that I had apparently copied a German link there!

"Das Leben wartet."

Damn, Wess & Jazzz have simul'd 3 times already in one post. Save some for the rest of us.

And stop hogging all the Cheez-its.

We have? No wonder I'm exhausted!

muahahahaha my evil plot is working! {rubs hands together in glee}

Seriously, I'm really bugged out that I couldn't get to Naperville in time... Been way too long since I've seen either of you!

Any photos in with the CheezIts and Snickers, Bumble?

Dave, pretty cool laptop ya got there.

I've been flying them for years and never had a problem.

Lisa -- It's not even in the phot... Oh, you mean the computer.

Sorry to disappoint you all, but it was just bad typing, exacerbated by exhaustion. And abysmal spelling skills.

Too bad the robot doesn't spell check.

Thanks for understandin' Meanie.

To further explain: At the signing this afternoon Dave and Ridley were excited to be staying in one city (San Francisco) for 2 days because it means they can do their laundry. I did not get close enough to either of them to confirm or deny this necessity.

Hopefully the muzak in the airport is not Barry Manilow.

They're never on time for me. And that's the truth.

Blue~ My pics aren't digital, but once I get them developed I'll scan them and send them to you.

My other sister just called; the one in Oregon. I emailed her when I saw the post.

She said, "47? How many did you put in?"

It was actually six bags each. The box was a 12 pack, and I don't like Cheez-its (I'm a Goldfish girl), sooo...

Snork @ LBFF & Dave.

Yep, I went back and looked at the photo too. And that is a pretty cool laptop, as small as it is. NTTAWWT.

Do they at least give you a room or anything?

Dave, I'm blushing. ;-)

Dave, I hope you got the porter to carry those bags under your eyes! You look like you need a nap, NOW!

Good luck.

I'm afraid you forgot the first rule of air travel out of New York: when a fly sneezes in Cairo, LaGuardia shuts down.

What exactly is a "hungry lunge"? Are they coming at you with teeth bared and drooling, or are they holding their stomachs, groaning, and sort of falling in your general direction?

delayed snork @ DAve & LisaBFF

Which is odd because Al Gore has a private jet. I guess the people flying it are like, "Do you really want to listen to cardboard talk."

I guess that New York Airplane got mugged.

Mr. Barry,

A friendly reminder from your Airport Security Staff!

The security here at O'Hare having been outsourced to India, will not affect the quality of security operations in any way. If you feel that you are in any danger, contact security personnel Sammy Walton at 888-456-1019 ext. 9246-5555.


Abraham Rincon

Airport Security, O'Hare International Airport

Dave, if you're stuck there for a long time, you might want to look into renting this.

Here are some fun facts you can use to impress airport personnel while you wait.

Dave, Ridley ~ Need pillows??? *wink*

*snork* @ fudtheman and punkin

Uh-oh. Now that they have a taste for them, you might want to watch out.

Yay, Bumble for saving Dave and Ridley from sure starvation! And, Chicago? Dave, couldn't you find a better place to be stranded?

Also, we want pics of you and Ridley wearing the lovingly-embroidered-by-her-own-hands Bumble's skull-and-crossbones caps. It's not like you have anything better to do. Besides beating off hungry zombies, that is.

I emailed some CrapCam photos of the Dayton event to judi to post when she sobers up has some time.

*snork* @ Suzy. Down girl. :-)

Dave~ Oh good. I won't see mine until Tuesday at the earliest.

*dashes off to finish roll of film taking pictures of sister's dog*

Dave, I'll betcha you wish YOU weren't quite so sober right now.

Dave, my mother had a compliment for you. She asked me how old you were, and I told her (sorry). She didn't believe me. She said, "There's no way he's that old. He looks much younger than your dad." (My dad is 58.) I had to google your birthday to make her believe me. :-)

For the record, I agree with her. You do not look nearly as old as you are.

Hey, Dave! Whatever happened to the unexpected video taken of you, me and Ridley with the giant bra? Is it on YouTube?

Dave, when dealing zombies, just tell them a joke that makes them have to think for the answer.

"I am being sarcastic."
or -before I say this I wish to say the answer is a play on words and has nothing to do with race-
"Whats the difference between Arabs and Mexicans?"
They will be spending time trying to learn spanish and Arabic plus the two cultures to figure out why that joke is funny. At that point. You will be in Miami.

Poo.... I'd say their more like a Barkalounger.

they're ! Holy crap!

I actually have several years of "learnin'", it's just when I get excited, things sometimes come out wrong. "Oh Poo, Oh Poo,....Uh, nobody dear,sorry.

Hope you're flying the friendly skies by now. The food is great in San Francisco. I mean, it ain't Cheez Its -- but you'll get by.

I hope Leetie-head is zipping cross-country in her strumpet tube even as we speak.

Yaay! Dave's plane is there! Have a safe flight.

Jazzzz-We've aaaaaall been there.

LBFF~ No doubt. I spent an entire day in a concourse at CVG once. Good thing I had a book. And a CD player. And my crochet.

Dave, I emailed judi the photo from Dayton, too.

Great to see you again, and meet Ridley. You guys had us in stitches today. Good lick with the rest of the tour.

Bumble, I posted some pics on my blog. Good to meet you today!

Lab~ Likewise. Thanks!

I thought that I had hubby talked into driving to Dayton today, but he said that driving 500 miles roundtrip with four kids under 10 in the backseats didn't sound like fun to him. So maybe when Dave's tour gets closer to Northeast Ohio, someday, I will get to meet Dave and a few bloglits. I'm glad everyone had fun!

Eek! Don't eat Cheez-its. Eat... well...

late to post tonight but i'm glad Dave & Ridley finally made it OUT of the airport and hope they don't encounter any snakes on the plane :)

I recently (4th of July) learned this about LaGuardia:

They do not like to release planes to fly to O'Hare. The attitude they take on that subject is "try and make us".

My flight from LaGuardia to Chicago was cancelled and I was rerouted to my final destination of St. Louis. HOWEVER, my luggage still went to Chicago and then St. Louis, just at a more leisurely pace.

Moral of the story, if you want to get from LaGuardia to O'Hare, hide in your luggage.

Just got home from Dayton and caught up here. I crossed two state lines to see Dave and Ridley, but it was worth it!

My camera seems to have had a mishap and won't cooperate. Or else I took some seriously crappy pictures.

I wish they had something that you could travel as luggage. I mean like one of those small one room apartments. Just ship that with myself inside. Have enough food and drinks, a Lazy Boy, and a bigscreen TV.. It should be ok.


saw the strumpets
they both look younger than me
life is so unfair

met some bloggers too
had to blush, was flattered by
neophyte's kind words

dave talked for an hour
i squirmed red-face in that chair
holding in the fart

Hey, I didn't know that Dave was coming to SF! Where do I find a copy of the strumpet itinerary?

BTW: I also sent judi my pictures, or at least the non-crappy ones, from this afternoon. I got a pretty funny one where it looks like Ridley is threatening Bumble's life but it came out all fuzzy. I got a great shot of Dave posing with the toilet full of snakes.

Never mind, found it. Dave, Kepler's in Menlo Park is an awesome bookstore. I wish I could make it!!!

marfie- there's an events section on the barry.com link


dave, ridley class act
gracious to all, and funny
even to us droolers

books "R" us made them
sign books for sale, i would have
told them to shove it

dave asked my daughter
if i embarrassed her much
she said no. just wait.

btw- nice haiku mud :) can't wait to see more pics

Hey Cheryl
I have Leetie. (thanks, mama723) Are you going to Menlo Park tomorrow ? I will be there, without digital camera, Help me out here, bloglits. What should I get Dave and Ridley ? Obviously, Cheez-its are out. We do have great California craft beers though....And it has to be something I can get tomorrow in my nephews' car without air conditioning.. long story. I am stuck in the Boil Mobile for the day.

* gives up being shy and joins the group*

The Dayton store is right down the street from my parent's house. My son, who is staying with them this summer, was all set to go but had to work all afternoon (he has a summer job there.) Don't know if my dad made it.

Hi, ShyJan! Not so shy anymore, eh? Yeah, they're probably a bit overloaded with the Cheez-Its by now. Beer is always good. They like beer. And penis bones. And sweet treats made in the SHAPE of penis bones. Oh, and big boobs, too. See Punkin entry. The fact that you have Leetie, The Official Blooger Mascot of StrumpFest 2006 is a plus! Can't go wrong with that.

AlanBoss: Hey, guy, where've you been hiding?

Poor Dave. Hope you got some sleep on the plane.

It's tought being a famous author sometimes, isn't it?

Say hi to Higgy and ShyJan and all the other bloglits today.

hope you get all that orange dye off your fingers.....

It's also "tough".

*memo to self - PROOFREAD!*

7:23 am on a Sunday simulpost!

Sorry you couldn't make it down here, queensbee.

Headline from the Bay Area Weather Service :

Good timing, Dave and Ridley ! Coincidence ? I think not....

ShyJan: you are up early. Look out for my buddy Higgy today. He'll be the one with the Welsh accent. And the Leetie Head. And probably a beer.

I saw that Sacramento was 110 yesterday with NO electricity for much of the area! Major ouch. Way to go Disney Books on how to plan a book tour.

Oh, and click on Lab Specimen's name up there for pictures from yesterday's signing.

Strumpeters and other fliers; try:


so you don't have to go up to the desk and hear the lies! Not every airport has wireless, but most to.

Hmmmm. Hot weather, in a city built around a bay. What to do, what to do?

Jeff, I will surely see Higgy. I have a Leeti Head too. Up early ? It's impossible to sleep in this heat. The weather service wasn't kidding. If I wanted to broil, I would have stayed in my home state Rhode Island.
I think I will get the boys some Kona beer. The bottle caps teach you a Hawaiian word. So you can drink and learn ! Hope they aren't reading these postings..Don't want to spoil the surprise.

Mudstuffin - The blog email address gets backed up with a LOT of submittals, so Judi might not get to your pics for a while, and I think she told someone else that she doesn't have anywhere to put them besides directly on the blog.

If you want to email them to me, I can get a link to them up this afternoon.

Oh, and


Welcome to California, guys !

Throws a 'd' up there and retrieves a 't.'

RE: emailing photos and posting them, I have been using a purchased program, but Windows XP has a built-in method for easily doing this. A brief tutorial:


I an still trying to figure out some aspects of linking to them, but Imageduck seems to be a good, free place to post them.

Jeffff....Don't feel bad, you got "thought" and a reference to Dave in one sentence. How often does that happen?

Wow - To think that those poor guys have gone from about as far east as you can get in the USA, to about as far west in 3 days...with working stops in between....sheesh... I salute their fortitude and ability to endure all with GREAT humor! And I give thanks to Zeus that they have found a LAUNDROMAT!

Suzy Q,

I've been crazy busy, so I manage to blurk every few days, but haven't had the energy to participate. I expect that I will be back up to speed soon! Thanks for askin'!

AB -

I've been busy goin' crazy, also ... merely want you to know you're not alone ...

... or ... whutever ...

GiantLeetie-head strumpet update sent to Judi from Menlo Park. We sat at the back and left early, so if you didn't see us, you'll know why....

U.O, I feel better then!

I am happy to report that my dad did make it to the Dayton strumpet. He got me a book, but neglected to take underwear to the authors as I instructed.

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