WORLD CUP

I would hate for anybody to not be paying full attention to work today, but: The US plays Ghana this morning in a game that the US must win to have any real hope of continuing in the tournament. At the same time, Italy plays the Czech Republic; the US also needs Italy to win that one. (I know these things because Mrs. Blog is in Germany, covering the World Cup. She has also sampled the beer, which she reports is excellent.) So if you have any rooting mojo to spare today, beam it toward our guys and the Italians. Especially our guys, because they need all the help they can get.

Hey... Do you think Dwyane Wade plays soccer?

Comments

[tropichunt.com guy™t]

He only plays soccer in Dwayne Wade City, Dave! That's where he likes to score first.

[julietin]

Sorry Dave...have you seen them play???...no comparison to Brazil, Argentina, Germany, England....the US pretty much sucks a little....

[daisymae]

Or as Lalas said on the Colbert Report, "USA! USA! USA!"

Methinks the US has not much of a chance, all things considered (or not).

Methinks me don't care.

Methings *Methinks* WBAGNFA New Celtic Band.

[daisymae]

Mebbe they can get baboons to steal the other countries' flags...as a diversion, ya know.

[Greg]

I can't help but wonder if the reason the US team is faring poorly has something to do with the fact that, for the past twenty years or so, soccer has been treated as a non-competitive togetherness celebration instead of a sport.

"Play for the tie! That way everyone wins!" is not a pep-talk you want to hear from your coach.

You indoctrinate kids early on that they're special just by setting cleat on the turf of a soccer field, and then you wonder why they lose games?

Then again, it could be worse. We could spend our free time burning cars and smashing windows because of a bad call by the officials. Given the choice, I'd rather let Ghana be good at something.

[pepe]

sorry Dave, but whenever the non-USA citizens think of the beautiful game, the stars n stripes just doesn't appear in my mind...

[Meanie the Blue]

I'm Ghana send all my good mojo to Mrs. Blog as she Czechs out the beer. She's going to need both, as Team USA is sadly outclassed, if not by Ghana then by the upper echelon teams that they'll be facing in the next round.

I hope she's avoiding the official brew of the Cup tournament, the self-appointed Kaiser King of Beers.

[Dave R]

If all the ducks line up and the US makes it to the round of 16, we face Brazil.

Brazil doesn't have the tradition of "everyone wins if we tie" that our youth learned while being handed drinks and snacks after a game.

[judi]

USA! USA! USA!

(nobody else can follow INSTRUCtions ;) we don't need no steenkin' facts!!!)

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAL!!!

[Scott]

I asked a co-worker where Ghana is located. His reply: "Ya know, it's in the West African hump surrounded by Ivory Coast, Burkina Faso and Togo."

My response: "Ah yes, of course."

What I actually thought: "There's really a country named Togo? I thought that was from a movie or something."

[Chaz, in Wade County Florida]

when does basketball season start again? I am lost with this soceer stuff....

[CoastRaven]

Looking at the stats so far for the tourney, I have THE one piece of advice that will help the US win today...

TAKE A FREAKIN SHOT ON GOAL!!!

(ONE shot so far??? Their only goal was scored by the opponent.)

[Straw]

Not to brag on my alma mater or anything, but a number of players on the U.S. team went to the University of Virginia. The coach, Bruce Arena, coached at UVA a number of years and his son has also played soccer there.

I met Dave Barry once and he autographed my copy of Dave Barry's Only Travel Guide You'll Ever Need. Where was it that I met him? When he came and gave a speech at the University of Virgina.

Coincidence? I think not.

[«LabSpecimen»]

USA! USA! USA!

I have a 10:00 "meeting" scheduled that runs until noon. What the boss doesn't know won't hurt him.

[random thunking]

Coast, you know that taking shots on goal risks breaking the Everyone Wins With a Tie Doctorine. This is the US of Freakin' A, we call it soccer while the rest of the world calls it football. When it come to this sport, we couldn't rent a clue.

Let's just stick with what we do best: obsessing over celebrities private lives.

[mudstuffin]

Dudes: I was born in the USA and started playing soccer back in '66. I played for many years and am now coaching. The only time I can recall hearing the "play for a tie - everyone wins" exhortation was on an episode of "King of the Hill" where they were making fun of soccer, sure, but also making fun of our (America's)lack of appreciation for the game.

Just because a tie is possible doesn't mean that a tie is desirable. I used to coach in a league where the official rule was "we don't keep score". But I can assure you that every kid on both teams, every parent, all the coaches, both refs and probably the birds in nearby trees all knew exactly what the score was at all times. Just because some touchy-feely nit-wit makes non-competition a rule doesn't mean competition ceases to exist. I could proclaim that my team "doesn't use gravity" but that would not keep the grass stains off their butts.

As for team USA, look into how many times Brain McBride has fractured bones in his face in pursuit of victory before calling him "non-competitive."

(Sorry for the cranky post, I have a toothache.)

[slyeyes]

USA can't do any worse against Ghana than the Cardinals have done against the White Sox the last two games.

*sits in corner and sobs*

[Rusty1]

Straw,

So, you are saying that the sole reason for the poor showing by Team USA in the World Cup rests on the University of Virginia and its coach?

As true as that may be, its a little harsh, don't you think? After all, the UVA Hokies might some day play a game outside the state. Maybe.

[Kevin in Jacksonville]

I just can't get into a sport where you can have an insurmountable 1-0 lead.

[Dave]

Kevin --
You mean like baseball? When there's a "no-hitter" going?

[CoastRaven]

Dave gets in a *ZINGER*

And random... sorry man, I dont know what I was thinkin. You're right - let's stick to what we do best.

[Matt Morrison]

I am watching ESPN, and Steve Levy said, "USA Goalkeeper Kasey Keller is the most successful goalkeeper in US History, yet he has never won a World Cup game."

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

mojo--------mojo---------mojo-------mojo------->USA!

mojo--------mojo--------mojo------mojo------->ITALY!

[«LabSpecimen»]

Mudstuffin: I understand your pain. Some people refuse to accept what a great game soccer is. There is more action than US football. And there is more action by ONE PERSON than in a three game baseball series. Or an entire season if you are the St. L Cardinals.

(sorry Sly... cheap shot)

[Dave]

I'm with Lab on this. I used to mock soccer. Then, in '98, I went to Paris with my son for the World Cup. Whoa. When we got home, we went to a Dolphins game, and we found ourselves saying, "How come they keep STOPPING?"

[Straw]

"UVA Hokies"

You know, it was one thing to besmirch the playing ability of the U.S. National Adjunct of UVA Soccer Team.

It is quite another to refer to us as Hokies. Draw. Your. Sword.

[Eleanor]

LOL, Dave! I watched my first soccer game ever when the U.S. played last week, and that's what amazed me the most, they don't stop to do stuff!!
They must really, really, really get tired, IMO! :)

[Jazzzz]

Don't worry Slyeyes, the Cards will be there in the end. And Dave, the are two sports seasons...Baseball, and Waiting for Baseball!

[CoastRaven]

Aaannnnnnnnnd They're OFF!

[Dave]

They're gonna run out of yellow cards over there.

[Jazzzz]

lots of pretty colors

[Nobody]

And don't forget, Eleanor, they're only allowed 3 substitutions in the entire game. Even for injuries. Pro soccer players are TOUGH.

Yeah, the US doesn't really have a chance to win the whole competition. I'm not rooting for them to win the whole thing. I'm rooting for them to create excitement about the sport in this country at a professional level. MLS is a start, but it's nowhere near the class of the european teams. That's why most of our best players play on european teams.

[Punkin Poo]

Once we hosted a 15 yr old boy from France for the summer. The poor kid watched the World Cup all alone in the den. Then one day I heard him shout. France had won! Poor bastard was trying to celebrate. He said to us "France won!! France won!!"

We idiot Americans were like "Oh, that's nice dear..."

Then the phone rang - it was his family calling him to celebrate. You could hear the shouts and laughter. After a good 10 minutes of revelling, he got off the phone, with a tear of joy running down his face, and happily explained to us that the crowds were burning cars in the streets - isn't it great?!

The only "World" thing I understand is the World Series. Which isn't even playing against "the world".

*sigh*

[Susy]

I personally think Shaq would be a suitable soccer player. Think about it...the net is MUCH MUCH bigger. Better odds no??

Love Shaq!

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

We used to have the North American Soccer League. Ft. Lauderdale had a team called the Strikers. The league folded in the 80s (I think) due to lack of interest. Maybe it's time to try it again.

[Dave]

I was in Paris the night France won. Best party I have ever seen.

[CoastRaven]

Are those yellow cards H@llmark or American Gr&&tings?

[Nobody]

Lisa - www.mlsnet.com :) I think they enjoy a level of popularity similar to arena football. I've been to some games in Chicago....it's a decent time...and WAY cheaper than any other professional sport.

[CoastRaven]

BOOOOOOOO

[Dave]

Damn.

[Jazzzz]

Why do our guys keep falling down and crying?

[CoastRaven]

That could be good for us... Goalies are fairly important arent they?

[Nobody]

Italy's up 1-0.

[Dave]

The worst of it is, I now have to go to an unchangeable dental appointment. I will be rooting from there. (Note how I refrain from making a root-canal joke; that is the kind of high-class humor professional I am.) So I will count on the commenters of this blog to help the US team surmount Ghana's potentially unsurmountable 1-0 lead. Italy is leading 1-0, so if the US can come back, there is hope. If.

[Straw]

The falling down and crying - they are hoping to be a shoo-in for the next Academy Awards. Or they're hoping the ref will call a foul on the other player. One of those.

[CoastRaven]

Go Dave Go!!!

[Jazzzz]

Now CR... we want to win with the other team at full strength. (Or, any freekin' way we can!)

[slyeyes]

In 1982, we had an exchange student from Brazil. His parents came to visit during World Cup. I THINK Brazil in the semi finals to Germany. Italy eventually won. Or something like that. Anyway, Brazil did NOT win.

They were so depressed that I considered hiding the cutlery. THEN we heard that back in Brazil, people really were committing suicide over the outcome of the game.

Sheesh. I mean, I'm a little upset about what has happened in Chicago the last two nights with my Cardinals, but there will always be another game.

*gives Lab a look*

[Addicted to 24]

This week I watched GREEN STREET HOOLIGANS in preperation for today's game and I came to realize three things.
1. I don't really get soccer.

2 Soccer fans are nuts.

3. Frodo got really buff and is quickly turning into a BAMF (Bad A$$ Mother Really Bad Word).

I am forever blowing bubles...

[Jazzzz]

Straw, This game won't last as long as a typical Academy Award acceptance speech. They will need more conditioning.

[Eleanor]

Is that Michael Buble(s), Addicted?

*tee hee*

[CoastRaven]

GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Nobody]

Geez...I can't believe I actually have to work through this. What's the world coming to?

[CoastRaven]

BS Call

[Jazzzz]

Poopie

[CoastRaven]

Man that halftime graphic came up quick... think they had that ready pre-game?

[Eleanor]

1-1

boo hoo, I miss all the good stuff

*zips back to the TV*

[Nobody]

It looks like the Chech team is playing down a man....2 yellow cards.

[CoastRaven]

2nd half (or so)

[Jazzzz]

Do you get extra credit for blocking a kick with your FACE?? Yows

[CoastRaven]

my gawd he CAN make a save!

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

It's kind of amazing that they ever get anything past those goalies!

[Tarheel Boy]

US Men's Soccer team comprised largely of UVA coach and players. Results- out in the first round, whipping boys of world.

US Women's Soccer team mostly from the University of North Carolina. Results- World Cup champions, Olympic gold medals, champions of the world.

Coincidence, I think not.

PS- What the hell is a Wahoo?

[Cheryl]

Somebody SAY somethin'!! I'm in an office over here. Not even a freakin' radio.

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

Well, Italy is leading by 2, but the US isn't at this point.

[LucyVanPelt]

Here are a few possibly really stupid questions:

Why does the clock say 81:29? How long is the game?

[Cheryl]

Did the Italians bounce the Czechs?

badum-PUM.

I'm here all week. Try the veal.

[Cheryl]

Answer for Lucy ... probably not first ...

The game is 90 minutes, plus extra time added for injuries & assorted stuff that seems very arbitrary to me, at the end.

[Cheryl]

Bad jokee make blogee leavee.

[LucyVanPelt]

Thanks, Cheryl!

[Boo Augustus]

Carolina girls,
Best in the world,
Sweet Carolina girls.

Oh sorry, just carrying on Tarheel Boy's theme.

[Cheryl]

Anyone lose a penis? I was just out by the dumpster ...

[Straw]

Quick google search....

"Wahoo, or Acanthocybium Solanderi, are the largest, fastest and meanest mackerel in American waters, said to reach speeds up to 60 mph."

"...as anyone who's eaten Wahoo knows, this is an excellent fish that titilates the palate..."

Uh...no comment...

[Eleanor]

Is it still 2-1 Ghana?

I've turned of the TV.

WHY?

Don't know. :):(

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

mojo nogo ;-(

["John Galt"]

Buh bye.

[Cheryl]

Oh THERE you all are. I thought I was alone in here. :-)

*was getting nervous*

[Neil G]

"The ball is round, the game lasts 90 minutes, everything else is pure theory."

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

On the upside, they keep saying Bruce "Arena" hee hee

[Boo Augustus]

Damn UVA! They always mess up everything.

[Cheryl]

Seriously? USA lost? Wow.

*group hug*

[Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa]

{{Cheryl}}

[Kevin in Jacksonville]

I can't get into sports with an insurmountable 2-1 lead either.

[CoastRaven]

Especially when that 2-1 lead was because of a blown call by a blind dentist! (the ref)

[LucyVanPelt]

Is any one watching the post game coverage?

There is an Irish gentleman talking and the other guys are just about busting a gut laughing every time he talks.

[slyeyes, a PK (Preacher's Kid)]

From mlsnet.com website..

....but a PK in first-half stoppage time sealed the win for Ghana

I'm going with PK being "penalty kick" (as I don't think "Preacher's Kid" works in this instance), but What-the-duck is "first-half stoppage time"!?!?!?!

[Matt Morrison]

Yeah, the Irish guy is Michael Davies. ESPN takes him out of his cryogenic chamber every four years for the World Cup.

[Cheryl]

Stoppage time is that weird, arbitrary stuff that I mentioned earlier ... injuries, whatever the ref decides to tack on at the end, when regular time is over. Time when the clock was "stopped" ...

In other words, no, I don't understand it either.

[«LabSpecimen»]

Dave, you really need to hate your dentist. First, for having his office open during the match, and second, because the damn dentist in Germany gave the game to Ghana.

*sigh*

[Dave]

Yeah, that was a terrible call, but I can't blame the refs for the loss. The US team just aint there yet.

Anyway, thanks to all who rooted.

[CoastRaven]

Dave - your just saying that because your dentist made you while he still has his hands in your mouth.

FREE DAVES TEETH!!!

[Annie Where-but-here]

Maybe Dave's dentist is a soccer fanatic and watches the game while he works on Dave's teeth....

Maybe that's not a good thing.

[WriterDude]

Dave, don't forget that we were without two players because of two horrible red card calls in the Italy match. No, it isn't entirely the refs. But that doesn't erase the observable fact that the officiating in this World Cup would make farting herring smell like roses.

Mrs. Blog, you may feel free to use that.

(Grumble, snarf...)

[Dave]

I agree that the officiating has been awful, and I think it's developing into a scandal. But officiating didn't cause the US to lose the first match 3-0, or to fail to score (except for an Italian own goal) in the second. The good teams overcome the officiating. I'm afraid the US just doesn't have the skill yet to compete at this level. I'm bummed that we're out, but I'm still looking forward to the rest of the tournament, which for me is the best sporting event there is.

[CoastRaven]

Dave I agree that our fair team is not up to world competition standards, and that by all accounts we shouldnt have even been still in it today (except for an errant Italian foot), but that was the most hideous call I have seen in any sport in a long time... Granted also that a single save would have made the call a moot point - that still doesnt change the fact that Herbie the Dentist blew a crucial call and gave the game to Ghana.

[Eleanor]

Question? The red card doesn't just mean that you're out for the rest of that one game??
It's forever??? Sheesh!

[Straw]

Dave, I hope this doesn't prevent you from ever coming back to UVA.

Oh, and Tarheel fan? It doesn't necessarily mean anything about UNC vs. UVA that the Women's U.S. National Adjunct of UNC soccer team won the Women's World Cup. Many other countries don't give much effort at all towards developing the skills of their female soccer players. All it means is that Americans are good at raising kickass ball women.

[Addicted to 24]

I believe that instead of trying to ban gay marriage or passing meaningless non binding resolutions congress should work on passing laws where officals who make bonhead calls are forced to pay dearly for their crimes against humanity.

[Boo Augustus]

Of course, when the U.S. is shamed in international sporting events like this -- um, what was this, dodgeball or something -- World Cup thing, I take comfort in knowing that we possess the power to wipe everyone else and their silly little games off the face of the Earth. And aren't above electing a government that would do it, too.

[Addicted to 24]

Amen Boo,

Besides I would love to see how team Ghanna would fair against one of our football teams