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April 14, 2006


Tainted Meat

(Thanks to Karl Weckstrom)

¹ Also "Free Meat" and "Mountain Meat." In fact pretty much anything you want to pair with "Meat" WBAGNFARB.


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It's Friday!

And, it's still Lent!

(No -- the butcher din't lent me some meat until Friday ... read it again, Duckwheat ...)

Also, "Ted's Mullet"

"Meat Gone" That just about sums it up.

*patiently waits for song parody*

"Brains left at door" That just about sums it up.

It's a song "Tainted Meat" to the tune "Tainted Love"

large "Meat Gone" signs were posted
Is Meat Gone anything like Bear Left?

I kind of like "Elk Meat Giveaway" as a band name.

At the very least, it's a provocative first line for a haiku. Mudstuffin, you listening?

Mountain Meat
Tell me I'm not the only one whose mind went directly into the gutter? Please??

Other GNFRB:
"Ted's Meat Mullet"&trade
"Ted's Mullet Meat"&trade
"Meat Ted's Mullet"&trade
"Mullet, Meat Ted"&trade®©

OK wolfie ... I'll tell you ... you're not the only one ... and ... if you believe that, I have some oceanfront property here in Nodak I wanna sell you, cheap!

Thank you for humoring the wolfie O.U.
*licks n sticks gold star to your forehead*
Do you ahve any mountain land? I prefer higher to lower.

Check out Ann Arbor's Hot Meat for Young Lovers:


Ya know HMfYL ^ is spam but it may actually be the first time in history that spam was ALMOST on topic.

*raises hand*
I, too, thought immediately of the incredible innuendo provided by the title and the article itself.
Think about it. Free mountain meat!

not to be confused with free-mounting meat...

("Paint It Black")
I drove my pickup here to get my tainted meat.
It might have cooties but the price just can't be
If it's prepared just right, I should have no cares at all,
I'll be rolling in elkburgers, when Ted Nugent comes to call!

My doctor said my diet was lacking in roadkill
This way he gets his meat when I pay off my bill!
I sneer at people lined up outside the Mickey D's
This is the best thing since they doled out surplus cheese!

I see a line of trucks to get their tainted meat
There would be trouble if we weren't all 'packing heat'
I want to eat it tainted, tainted, tainted meat!!!
I want to see bad spots not cut from the sides!

*wild applause*

**snorks** all around!!

*perks* @ CR

Oh wait.. that wasn't an offer. I retract my perk.

*snork* @ insom

wolfie - does your mind ever not go directly into the gutter?

and speakin' of mountain meat...

Thumper ~ it's one of the reasons you lust me best isn't it?

*looks all cute n innocent and stuff*

that, and the whole cute and innocent thing


tainted mountain meat
in the back of my pick-up
gettin' laid tonight

before culling herd
let us feed them coffee beans
I feel like a twit

eating mountain meat
pick fur and lead out of teeth
cheap at twice the price

As always, haiku
Of a very high order
You got the stuff, Mud

Thmpr: I misread your post and thought you'd asked "Does your mind go directly into the guitar." I can honestly say that, yes, yes it does.

I named my band "Blue Meat" way back in 1988 or so.. We played all over.. And it was good for some laughs..

Tainted Meat - by Soft Smell

Sometimes I feel I've got the
Runs back there, I've got to
Get myself
To the low-flow toilet I had thrust upon me.
The meat they’ve shared
Seems to emanate
A truly foul aroma
For I grunt and strain there is no end in sight

Elk, I wait for you (I wait)
Now I'll drive with you
This tainted meat you're giving
Please put it in my El Camino
Bake my fears and brucellosis out
Oh...tainted meat..oh, oh, oh, oh-oh
Tainted meat


Excellent! (Holds up cell phone)

Is 'mountain meat' what you get with Rocky Mountain oysters?

My brother called me and asked me if I wanted some elk. I'm pretty sure he didn't mention the tainted part.

[goes outside to wait for the FedEx guy]

judi, you should be showing some love for one of the great underrated bands of all time The Meat Puppets.

Funnily enough, this humor phenomena also occurs with the word "beef". A few years ago some fellow in Sweden was arrested while he was trying to climb naked under a gate. He insisted that the arresting officers refer to him as "fine beef". (sounds reasonable to me..)My 14 year old son immediately changed his screen name to "nytta oxkott".

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