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March 13, 2006

WHY THE BLOG WENT TO ENGLAND INSTEAD OF TEXAS

Reason Number 13

(Thanks to Russell Mc)

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Quote:
It gets in your blood," said Wells, 73.

If it gets in your blood, your not a candidate for the best rattlesnake wrangler...

"It gets in your blood," said Wells, 73

ummmm - if it does yer DEAD!!

WOW - a psychicsimulfitdy!!

Uhm, you're not your.

I'm just so giddy about the impending purchase of the Knight Ridder papers that I forget myself.

I will turn myself in to the Association of Copy Editors'

Poor journalism again... no recipes, nothing that tells us where to order a few pounds, no taste tests, nothing on the competitive snake-eating contests! Terribly incompetent. It really makes me MAD! I believe Dave will HAVE to go next year and give us a proper report. Anyone else in favor of sending him?

I'm from 'round those parts.

You know what's creepy, though? As many rattlesnakes as they round up, I still managed to come face-to-face with ONE TOO MANY out in the pasture... *SHUDDER-SHUDDER-PARALYZED-HEEBIE-JEEBIES* I can't imagine what it'd be like without the roundup. *queasy* However, I never attended one.

/end not-funny, true, walk down memory lane

OK, here's a picture of some of the "Sweetwater Jaycess...

funny, they don't look like crazy snake people

I miss Texas.

I'm not reading this article.

Catch me when we're back in England.

"Besides the roundup, there's a parade, a snake charmer pageant, a snake meat eating contest..."

...followed immediately by a snake meat projectile vomiting contest...

Tamara - I miss Texas, too....whenever possible.

(rimshot!)

TCK, yes, they do look like crazy people to me...

We're havin' http://www.lasr.net/pages/lake.php?Lake_ID=OK02lk001&VE=Y&Event_ID=OK0209024e001 in these here parts as well.

Sorry, thought I had it figgered out. Never mind.

Eating rattle snakes? Are these people touched?
Just point me in the direction of the nearest squirell-rat jerky hut please.

so what happens to all the rattlesnakes they bring in?

chambrey - the round up is followed by a law firm job fair...

Ahhhh, great eats yer talkin' about here! Fried rattlesnake, cream of spotted owl soup, rat-squirrel jerky, Chunky Monkey, beer on tap in the bathroom... it just doesn't get any better than this!

**Snork** @ fivver

(hides fivver's post from Eleanor)

*hides nannie's ^snork^ from Eleanor*

* having forgotten about El, fivver just hides! *

Soap,, let's tie up the meal with a little chicken ripple ice cream!

*DISTRACTS El from noticing Annie's concealment of Nannie's SNORK at Fivver*

Fivver, forgetting about El is a much more serious offense!

fivver - don't bother hidin', she'll either track ya down just the same, or she'll wait, ever so patiently, not unlike a hawk watchin' a praire dog hole, cuz she knows, sooner or later, you'll pop your head out of the hole, just for a quck look around, just to see if it's safe, and just about when you've decided it is, indeed safe - WHAM

better to take your medicine now, and get it over with

Oh, Blue, now you went and distracted me.

*focusing, FOCUSING...*

Tamara RWC and Annie - re: missing Texas: If you miss Texas, I suggest you reload and take better aim.

Mr. C - not worth the ammo.
Thelonious - you're having those dreams again, aren't you?

"Nobody badmouths the round-up!"

NOBODY


*Snork* @ Mr. C "reload and take better aim"

some people, er, squirrels, that is, like Texas.

fivver: I think you're dead meat no matter which way you look at it.

Annie - do ya mean the dreams about you, or the ones with william shatner reciting the declaration of independence whilst wearing a pink tutu?

Tucker - I thought that was one and the same...dream.

no silly -in the dreams about you, you're recitin' the declaration of independence whilst wearin' cowboy boots

Tony Lamas or Justin?

"There's also a demo on how to skin a rattler... to use the skins."

Ooh, they have arts-and-crafts!

and here I thought you would ask whether you were wearin' anything else....

Tony Lamas

Trevor - which is exactly why I didn't go there, and exactly why you like me.

What they need is a good old fashioned Whacking Day!

Just like Jebediah Springfield would have done.


The local cops are in no way prepared for an event of this magnitude.

And our children! Who will protect our children?

With luck, all will come out all right in the end.

Mew! Let's make potholders!

Ken sed "What they need is a good old fashioned Whacking Day!"

Hey, I'm in favor of that! I'd like to start by whacking all of the Moron Drivers who are out on the roads during my daily commute.

yeah, if there's one thing Annie ain't, it's easy

Soap-at least you don't have to deal with crazy people on the subway. Some of the guys in Paris bring sleazy to a whole new level.

KDF-We could also make a nice pair of cowboy boots for Annie to recite the Declaration in.

Hi all. It's been a while since I've monitored this blog. And then when I do, one of the first items has personal relevence to my own bad self. I, for one glorious year, was a Sweetwater Jaycee. No kiddin'. What I remember most about the Roundup is the overwhelming smell of snake-urine when you enter the rodeo arena where the event is held. That and the reception area with gratis free-flowing alcohol behind the scenes. What they don't tell you when you join the Jaycees is that at your first Roundup, after all of the snake-groupies have gone home, you get initiated. That involves having to grab a big-ol rattlesnake and milk it for venom. The good news is that you're closely supervised by a master snake wrangler. That comforted me until I later heard that at least one master snake wrangler is bitten during most Roundups.
As for what they do with the snakes, that part is actually kind of interesting. Almost everything is used. First, the snakes are milked for venom, which I believe is used for cancer research. Then, they are relieved of their heads on a chopping block. Being one of the choppers is always one of the honors bestowed upon Miss Snake Charmer. They are then skinned (the snakes, not Miss Snake Charmer), and the skins sold to whomever it is that buys snake skins, like maybe boot makers. The (ahem) "meat" is sold to whomever it is that buys snake meat, except for a small percentage of it that is fried up and served on site. Brace yourself: it tastes a little like chicken and a lot like ass. It was way, way too bony for my tastes, too.

Anyway, a sex scandal rocked the Jaycees a few months after my first Roundup, and I decided not to renew my membership. Starting the next year, I always participated in the accompanying bar-b-que cook-off rather than the Roundup itself - same amount of beverage consumption but with better food and whole lot less snake-urine.

I really don't think you should use "sex scandal" and "rocked the Jaycees" so close together moe. BTW, did it involve Miss Snake Charmer?

Miss Snake Charmer - "Please, sir, can I have some Moe?"

I used to have a friend that made belts and boots out of snakeskin for groups like Motley Crue. Key words - 'used to have' a friend, poor guy.

Wow, big confession. I was about to deride Moe for not knowing that snake venom is used as an antivenin for administration in snake bite cases. Then I decided to look it up and darned if they aren't showing promising developments in anti-cancer research using snake venom! A tip o' the hat and my respect, Moe!

Sex scandal?? Do tell!

TRWC - a 'sex scandal' within the Jaycees does not necessarily involve more than one person...methinks that Federal Duck may be up to more creative stylings than the Jaycees...

NOT HERE.

pssst, KDF, that "Distraction" that Blue posted was really something, yes? and please tell fivver that - well, you know what to say. :)

*NOT zipping out since I never zipped in*

psst, El, -ohnny Jay -amon Day?

*gasp*

That's some serious weaponry there! Watch out for Blue, he's got my number! Uhmmmm... yours too, yep.

*not noticing anything*

No, the sex scandal did not involve Miss Snake Charmer. As I recall, Miss Snake Charmer was generally a somewhat homely 15-year-old daughter or granddaughter of someone on the SweetTater (as the town affectionately became known to those of us transplanted city folk) Chamber of Commerce. To explain the sex scandal I must first provide some background information: the Jaycee's meeting hall at that time consisted of a lectern, about 40 folding chairs, and a refrigerator with a beer tap through the door. That sweet, sweet Roundup money would keep us in kegs easily through the year. The business part of the meetings generally took about 15 minutes and the post-meeting party took about 4 to 4 1/2 hours. Apparently at one of the post-meeting parties, the fiancee of a visiting Jaycee from another town got down on her knees and payed homage to the Grand Poobah (or whatever the position was called) of the SweetTater chapter - in front of a large group of people. Not sure if that is exactly how it went down (har!) because I missed that particular meeting, but that is the version that quickly spread through the small town. Of course that incident led to a complete shake-up in the organization's leadership and, much more alarmingly, permanent removal of the kegerator. I was glad that I was able to claim that I quit because I did not want to be associated with an organization of such questionable values, but the real reason was, of course, the aforementioned removal of the kegerator.

Wow - that is scandalous. If they ran a plot like that on 24, then I'd be sure to watch.

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