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March 15, 2006

WE HAVE ONE QUESTION

Can you take the Leprechaun Train to the testicle festival in the Bucket of Blood parking lot?

(Thanks to Justin Barber)

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Something about that title reminds me of a particularly bad date...

The official drink of the festival

I have never been that hungry.

Jesse Fry watches as his mother ... *faints*

If Mountain Oysters are what these people consider 'good food' is shudder to think what they consider 'fun'. Bobbiting for apples maybe?

They're bull balls dipped in eggs and batter, and fried before you eat them.... Notice I said YOU eat the damn things cause I aint touching them!!

Mountain oyster fry, followed by a parade featuring "best marching unit, best musical unit and best equestrian unit". No comment needed.

Also, I will never look at a baked ziti without major suspicion.

My question is: Why is the St. Patrick's Day parade on Sunday... when St. Patrick's Day is on Friday?

-ME

liked the picture of the kid looking at Mom chowing down on the mountain oysters...

"Is that what Daddy has?"

"Had, son, had."

*SNORK* @ Insom!

I like the terrified expression on the child's face as he watches his mom eat the sheep version of his favorite bags of fun. That'll require serious therapy.

I guess we vegetarians will just have to settle for neuticals.


I'm just wonderin' what is on the commemorative T-shirts.

. . . can be coated in egg and bread crumbs, fritter or tempura batter, then they're browned in butter and spices and wine and simmered in highly seasoned sauces.

And the office is wondering why I'm crossing my legs reflexively.

Make sure the earlier teacher doesn't know about this.

Oh sure...she'll put a SHEEP's testicle in her mouth...

FOUL! Improper teabagging technique!

(WHY do I SAY these things?)

(Dr Blue--check me for Tourette's?)

#1 on the list of "What not to say in a job interview."

Oooh, noooo!

KDF -- What? "FOUL! Improper teabagging technique!"?

As the great World War II general once declared: NUTS!

*snork*@Tam

Hey Tamara, relax -- nobody was complaining.

Mt. Sterling, Illinois also has a testicle festival.

...unless the job you're interviewing for is Assistant to the Stealth Bloggerette, in which case, "FOUL! Improper teabagging technique!" will land you the job.

aww, nuts. i gotta be someplace else. and snork to insom and tamara...

Meanwhile, I'm in a fetal position with my legs crossed.

OK, I used ta say I would never, ever try these, until I did try 'em one evenin'

just goes to show ya that you should never say never - cuz ya never know what you might do after enough alcohol has been consumed, and while that big cowboy is callin' you a pussy

I also never say "I couldn't get that drunk" anymore, cuz I've pretty much proven that I can

BTW, Rocky Mountain Oysters aren't bad when you're sh*tfaced - not sure how they'd be otherwise

*beautiful woman asks if she can coat his testicles in egg and bread crumbs, fritter or tempura batter, then throw in butter and spices and wine*

*becomes nervous*

*lets her anyway*

Do you want mountain oyster fries with that?

C'bol - How'd that work out for ya?

Just a lousy minute!! Now I'm REALLY MAD! We don't have balls in the USofA, they've got to be shipped in from NEW *FRIGGIN'* ZEALAND!!??! Huh? Oh yeah, never mind, don't answer that....

What the-?? I live in southern Oklahoma, I've even eaten fried rattlesnake, but for the love of SHOES! I just don't GET this hungry. I pass out first.

Yes...well...in florida we eat the real thing (oysters) from...the ocean.

Dare I suggest that Bobbing For Oysters WBAGNFARB?

Sly! A friend and I spend a week every October at White Pines St. Park. We j u s t manage to miss Byron's Turkey Testicle festival every time. It takes careful planning, but we manage.

Dang, all the funny comments are taken.

*snork* at insom. And Tamara. and C'bol.

In re: rocky mountain oysters: I'd eat'em. With relish. I'm sure that's good eatin'. Anyhow, I've eaten chicken feet, they can't taste worse.

Anything tastes good battered and fried, anyhow. :)

If they call the balls of sheep 'rocky mountain oysters', then what do they call the penises? 'Homegrown sausage'?

Anybody ever eat chittlins? Gives new meaning to the adjective sh*tty!

They do at least shave them at first, right? Or does boiling water take care of that?
*haunches around the world tighten*

geezer musical alert...
("Mountain of Love" by among others Johnny Rivers)

Standin' in the desert, goin' to the gonad party
Gonna be fine eatin' testicularly hearty
Male genitalia spread throughout far and wide
Many of 'em breaded
Many of 'em fried
I used to be so hungry
Until I saw what's sold
Out at the Bucket of Blood

Bucket of Blood, Bucket of Blood
They say "What's in a name?"
If you donate to the Bucket of Blood
Then you will start acting 'tame'.

Away in New Zealand there's a half a million
bleaters.
Thinking to themselves,"Well, at least we kept our
peters."
Though we called to our mates in a higher register
and our lack of equipment hadn't impressed 'er.
Still we can't go feral
Mostly 'cause we're sterile
Due to the Bucket of Blood...

Blogchik- If you think you can handle anything. Try live octopus.

A humongous and genuine *SNORK!* to insom'! WTG!

As I read this story, the old theme song of the college band "Hot Nuts" (anybody remember them?) came to mind. I may google them and see if I can come up with the lyrics.

Why did they have to be flown in from NZ? Aren't there enough ballocks in the US? (Insert usual Congress reference here).

Suggested ad slogan:

I went to Virginia City and had a ball!

Re: the chitlins questions.

I understand that there are two ways to prepare them: hand-slung or stump-whipped. The stump-whipped come out cleaner, but some say that the hand-slung have better flavor, with delicate corn overtones and a stronger finish.

Ernie...Actually, the Byron TurkTestFest ad says, "Come and have a ball." Ain't it good to know there are fine minds all over this great country workin' on testicular slogans?

Another day, another SNORK!@ Insom. Ho-hum.

Want to know what I want to see?

*crowd shouts "NO!"*

I want to see the look on the guy's face when he finds out what mountain oysters are... AFTER he eats one!

Chris - I would think he'd be a bit teste.

Meanie - I know I would be.

"a bit teste"

*thinks, but doesn't say, "duh!"*

Meanie and Tamara - Well, you are what you eat...

Ernie G,

Actually, I've always heard the best way to prepare chittlin's is just to boil the sh*t out of 'em.

Does that mean you boys are pus--

[breaks into a cold sweat trying keep mouth clamped shut]

Tamara - BWAAAA HAHAHA!!!!!!

Try a cup of tea, Tamara. That should calm you down.

And I resent the very idea that you think we are pushovers.

Or pus-filled maggots!

Mmmmm... perhaps you should join us over at the Impaired thread for some relaxation and cognitive distraction.

And I am not pus-filled! (Today, anyhow).

My question for Slyeyes is why do you seem to be making a career out of documenting festivals where testicles are boiled, fried and otherwised cooked?

*covers crotch with hands and backs away slowly from Sly*

Tamara RWC - I know where you were going with that, and yes. Yes, I am.

*dials Mrs ThePoint*

"Hey, girl! How's it goin'? Hey, listen--um, do you share? Oh, you know--do you 'sha-a-a-a-a-are'? [listening] Oh. No, you don't sha-a-a-a-are. Okay, all right, got it. No problem. Okay, but, um... Hey! When's your next business trip away from Mr C where you'll be leaving him home alone and lonely? [grimaces, holds phone away from ear] Okay, I know, I'm sorry! Really, I'm sorry! Yes, "sister solidarity", I know... Sorry! Sorry, sorry! Oh, look, my--my everything's on fire! Gottagobye!"

Tamara - Yep, that's pretty much how it would "go down".

*SNORK*

TRWC - may I call your attention to Mr. C's response to KDF on the previous thread:

Sorry, I seem to have dropped this.

s

Posted by: KDF | 12:46 PM on March 16, 2006

*ahem*

KDF gets her s handed to her.

Posted by: Meanie the Blue | 01:08 PM on March 16, 2006

Ahem.

Posted by: KDF | 01:11 PM on March 16, 2006

Hey, nice s.

Posted by: Mr. Completely | 02:07 PM on March 16, 2006

pssst, Annie, thanks for leaving my final reply out of that. ;)

Ohhhh, myyyyy... I seem to have dropped a letter! Oh, woe is me...

s

Yeah, I don't know, either. Nevermind. *snork*

Tamara - You've got a nice... letter, too. Here, let me get that for you.

Tamara Rhymes With Scarlet - you are a definite woman of letters.

Tamara....Tara.....hmmmmmm.

And I am in Atlanta... HMMMM...

OH, ASHLEY!

Blue Meanie If TRWC a woman of letters I hope they aren't scarlet

Mad SNORKist!

"Samples, at $2 each, will go on sale at noon, and other side dishes will be available in addition to drinks."

Lots and lots of drinks.

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