« Previous | Main | Next »

March 15, 2006

NEWS REPORT ON POPULAR SLEEP PRODUCT THAT RHYMES WITH TAMBIEN (SORT OF)

It's not just for breakfast any more.

(Thanks to F. Strong)

Comments

Feed You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.

Well, at least they're not driving while they're sleeping....oh, wait(not weight)...!

that's my story, and I'm stickin to it.

Two words - duct tape.

aaaand it's a first for Annie!!!

That's why I prefer parfait for my insomnia - I still get the munchies, but at least I am awake to enjoy them.

Who needs pills? All she has to do is drink a few beers before bedtime - there's your sleep aid!

I think everyone's still back there mourning Edgar, who may or may not have taken Hambien.

*burp*

Coming soon to a court room near you, "The Ambien Excuse".

Buttered cigarettes! Mmmmm-MMMMMM!

hmmmmm...I wonder if you can do other things while taking Ambien? Like, oh, run for office, 'n' make foreign policy, 'n'stuff.

That comes on the heels of reports that some Ambien users may drive while sleeping.

The drive-through isn't slow enough, now I have to deal with sleeping hungry drivers.

"ex-insomniac"

HA!

You mean I shouldn't eat those salted bacon butt sandwiches? I never got that memo.

Um, helloooo, do we not think Judi's headline is a little wink at our very own Tamara?

Perhaps it's code for: "YES, I need an assistant! Job's yours."

I GOT THE JOB!!! ;)

Yeah, I took Ambien the other night. Then I had a dream I ate a giant marshmallow. When I woke up my pillow was gone.

*rim shot*

Well MartiniShark, how else do you expect them to get to Wendy's for their food?
OH - finger in the chili, could it be...?

OK, tambien rhymes with, um, cambien?

that seems, um, not quite right


One day I got up. Ate cereal. Talked to my room mate and decided that I should be sitting inside my bike. I woke up tangled to a bike and having a conversationg with my room mate. Real Eye opener.

Betsy- Which president are we talking about? The last 15 seemed to be doing all the same stuff. Maybe they all did not inhale the same doobie. Possible because soem of them went to the same college. Imagine Gary Truedeu the author of Doonsbury being told not to hang out with those weirdo Democrats by George Bush. They are both sitting near a keg. Now imagine one of those weirdo Democrats is John Kerry and Bill Clinton. Thats reality at its weirdest.

"Stupid Republicans."
"Stupid Democrats."
"More Beer?
"Sure.."

Guess that explains why those restaurants are open so late.

I would love to see the marketing genius who decided they had to start catering to the somnambulistic masticating expeditionists.

MShark - "the somnambulistic masticating expedi..." ?? Wow.

How come nobody pointed out what good names for rock bands could be made from Buttered Butts or Raw Bacon?

Too scary: you get up and drive to McDonald's (tm thingy) for a quadruple cheeseburger with fries and extra salt and you're (not your) asleep the whole time!

Who is going to believe that one? Especially if you're (not yore) naked at the time.

Jeff-Hopefully said persons Wife.

What was that Alfonso Cuaron movie about insomniacs?

Y Tu Mama Ambien? That doesn't quite sound right.

*snork* @ F79, that was really BAD!

Wish I'd thought of it.

I think I'm beginning to see why my morning commute is so slow -- the freeways are full of Ambien junkies! Oh wait, maybe it's MEeeeezzzzzzzzzzzzz

You mean eating buttered butts isn't normal? Wait, oh they mean cigarette butts! Oops...

My brother sleep-eats without meds. Once he sleep walked into the garage, got a handfull of chocolate chips from the freezer and walked back to his bed, eating them on the way. The next morning my mom went to get him up and saw this thick brown stuff smeared on the walls and was totally grossed out. Then she saw that there was goey brown stuff on his face, shirt, and sheets. He didn't keep eating them after he got into bed and they had melted all over the place!

Well, THAT explains alot. I'm going back to drinking my bedtime sleep aid. (To bottle of Hot Damn 100) "Hello, Lover..."

This is starting to remind me of a Calvin and Hobbes strip.

Wait a minute. I'm a Somnambulating Masticating...what was the demonination again? I thought I was Methodist. There I go again.

"I put on over 100 pounds since I've been on Ambien"

"I would wake up in the morning and there would be candy wrappers all around the bed"

I think I could have put 2 and 2 together before hitting 100 pounds. Then again, I don't believe in the Candy Wrapper Fairy.

I wonder why no one here has yet said (and I've only read about this) that the only thing they ever found on their bedroom floor in the morning was a used cond - never mind. Sorry I brought it up!
(rimshot!)

probably because the closest I have gotten to that is falling down and waking up with someone making out with me. I have decided that my unconscious has way more fun then I do.

You are getting verrryyy sleeeppyyy......

You are getting verrryyy hungryyyyyy...

Interesting. I wonder if Ambien can cause you to murder people in your sleep as well. Hey driving while asleep practically is murder. Maybe that's what happened to Edgar. "Hey what am I doing here with this empty canister? What's that horrible smell?"

You are getting verryyy horrrnnyyy....

My mom called the minute she saw this on TV! Yes, I take Ambien and yes, apparently I have done this.
My favorite "sleep food" seems to be dry cereal. More than once we have found a trail of crumbs.... I blamed the kids. Then they grew up amd moved out - I was baffled!!! I have even told them to quit "grocery shopping" in my kitchen when I'm not home.
The day my mom called -
The night before, I dreamed I was fixing my APAP (for sleep apnea). When I woke up I had dismantled the thing in my sleep. I was digging through my bed looking for parts.
Makes me wonder how truly restful of sleep I am getting.....

Anyone else ever do something really weird and then pretend to wake up.

Thisbearbites- Well you could be shooting people in the thigh in your sleep.

To my stomach and subconscious- How did we get to Ireland. And for that matter, on the trip to New York. Did we talk with anyone?

To my Wife- What is your name? When will we meet? Why did you chose out a purple formal shirt and yellow tie. With Brown pants?

True story - years ago, I woke up in the middle of the night to my then-husband punching me in the stomach. He said he was dreaming that I was his mom, and that I had taken a toy away from him, so he was punching me.
Sometimes, Dr. Freud, your job is ridiculously easy. Talk about yer somnam-ballistic, massive-hating exploding a$$holes...

This is the reason why Freud was such a pothead.

annie...mine used to wake me up out of a sound sleep with the words, "OK...let me tell you what's wrong with you." (I know this doesn't count, cuz he was awake. But I wasn't.)

During my mission one of my companions was going home. We had a tough area so it was sort of stressing him out. He would talk in his sleep.
"Elder I know how to solve our Area."
"REally?"
"Geocode."
"OK thats not funny. Your awake."
"Huh what."

And in the Missionary training center I would hear all of my roomates talk to each other in there sleep. They would wake up all talking about fishing. And they thought it was really weird that every one else had the same dream.

"Wow check out the Otter."
"Yeah, its telling us where the trout are."

I think Freud was a coke head, or heroin.

Does anyone else get the Andy Borowitz daily "newsletter"? He addresses this very issue today.
VF but I don't think I can link to an e-mail. *sigh*

I didn't think I was gonna lose any sleep over this thread since I don't take Ambien, but I am not at all sure now.

Speaking of wild dreams, take a look at this film classic set to new orchestration:

http://blogfiles.wfmu.org/KF/0509/movies/sunra_pink_elephants.mov

(Sorry, if I direct-linked this, I will be wearing a green-striped suit and shackle accessories tomorrow, IYCMD). Paste the URL into your browser, or into the address box of your media player, and it should come up. It might take a moment to load, and you'll need to hit the play button to start it, most likely.

El, is this it? It's on the home page, so this probably won't link to the Tambien story for long.

Good Gawd, Blue, it's not even 9:30 and you're already playing kinky dress-up games again? You are distracting me!

*feigns disgust*

*Snork* @ Betsy!!

Gah. Men.

NonDisAntiUnSNORK @ the distractable one.

BTW, the video is also worth the distraction if you're into animation (calling CoastR.....)

Tamara RWC - Hey! I resemble that remark!

YESSSSSSSSSSS, KDF, thanks! :)

Isn't it just the funniest?!?!

Key quote: "In what is perhaps the most disturbing revelation in the study, Tambien users may give away control of U.S. ports to foreign interests while totally unconscious."

Oy.

Yes, I felt quite validated when I saw that Andy had expanded on the scenario I suggested at, um, 3:56 p.m., blog time, yesterday.
P.S. This is neither the first nor last time that Mr. Borowtiz, who is El's and my second-favorite humorist, has provided evidence that his mind and the Blog's collective unconscious are all dancing on the same edge of madness:)

Perhaps Mr. Borowitz like to blurk. Hmmm?

Sorry, I seem to have dropped this.

s

*ahem*

KDF gets her s handed to her.

Ahem.

Hey, nice s.

uhhhh....

*considers rolling eyes, instead says:*

Thanks!!!

KDF...Right on! Take them compliments where you can get'em:)

p.s. my theory on email/IM/blog errors is that they're way more aurally influenced than normal typos. For instance, if you 'hear' Borowitz as a plural, you HAD to drop the 's'. Obviously the proper constructions would be 'Borowit likes' /'Borowitz like to...'

/Halfwit stops theorizing, but knows if her name was Halfwitz, she'd type "stop"

Freud -the Correct answer is Coke head

I missed out on the Fun Section of History for Psychiatry.Hour long visits and your patients sane,,,

INSTEAD --- I got the Managed Care 15 minute visit from He** and budget short-cutted public Mental Health version.

Sigmund, please pass the Coke, EB

Of course, I COULD get a prescription for Ambien and sleep through it..... while writing prescriptions for Ambien..


You are getting sleeepy vereeerrryy sssllleeeeeppppyy

EB

(I know someone who drove on Ambien and alcohol... hit a tree,and lived to tell the tale......)

Yeh Ambien is funky stuff...if you're still upright when it takes effect...I tend to start feely sorta oddly energized in a drunk/stoned sort of way, tend to decide it would be a good idea to have a big snack, or tidy up my room or whatnot...at 2 in the morning.

Basicaly, if the ambien is working and you don't fall asleep, you tend to find yourself doing whatever seems like a good idea at the time...such as writing rambling forum posts...

Yeah I know the feeling. I took Ambien 8 years ago and I am still writing.

I once did a job for a client at 4:30AM, getting home and falling back into bed at about 6:00AM. Three weeks later, a speeding ticket arrived in the mail. It was not until I looked in my glove compartment and found the carbon of the ticket that I even remotely remembered being pulled over. Meds had nothing to do with this, BTW.

The comments to this entry are closed.

-
 
Terms of Service | Privacy Policy | Copyright | About The Miami Herald | Advertise