« Previous | Main | Next »

March 27, 2006


(Via Gizmodo)



Feed You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.

We do, indeed. And the FIRST? thing I noticed was the name: Ipiphani???

And please note that I achieved that 'first' WITH the effin' robot.

Thank you, thank you.

*consistently breaks caffeine button due to extreme overuse*

Sorry - I don't want to play Simon - I just want a friggin bottle of soda!!

& on the UPDATE - one of the links at the bottom takes you to

"NEW! Feminine Odor"

Errum - is there a new odor that I havent run into yet?

*slips off to try and find a research subject*

P.S. - way to go Non-Bot-Betsy!!

yep. i agree with coastraven. what if somebody is realllllly thirsty - gonna wait for all that? and if the computer crashes, and adds stuff right about then, well, whadda ya get.... cola with a chicken soup additive? bleah.

*Gasp!...... cough!..... too.... many choices....[expires from dehydration].*

I'm wondering what 'ze liquid' is they keep talking about!

...We need more additives in our drinks?

i'm thinking you have to call the EPA to dispose of those filters... and how good a friend do you have to be to test if it still works?

Of course, some hack comes along and presses the buttons on your drink while you're not looking. So, instead of the sparkling cherry refreshment you are expecting, you get double caffeine mud.

Is this bottle disposable? Just what we need--a HUGE increase in the amount of computer junk added to our landfills...

Next thing you know, they will get permission to revert to the original Coca-Cola™ formula, and there will be an extra button for cocaine. Should this occur, God only knows what the Pepsi™ generation will come up with.

Mathmom - recyclable for use by hospital patients self-dispensing controlled doses of morphine

herb - you went right where I was going next. This might not be a good sign for you.

Anybody who has kids and has sent them to the soda fountain to get their own drinks knows that they'll create their own "cocktail" by getting some of every flavor. I see this Ipiphani as a waste of money for such amateurs, who would just push every button for the heck of it.

The Update is a timely reminder to us all not to pull Leetie's finger ...

*Wonders if he will win the race to combine the original post with the update*

Yes - now, an amazing personal hygiene breakthrough, instant custom-flavored flatulence! Turn your worst fear into your greatest......


*a Pyrrhic victory, at best*

'A programmable paint container with twenty pigment additive buttons allows the consumer to choose from one million colors.'

Speaking as a person who is temporarily living in a friend's attic while attempting to clean out and redecorate her condo for the first time in 16 years, may I just say, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAGH!"

I'm already surrounded by chips of 500 shades of white (clam, oyster, salt, cream, dawn, hope, alabaster, perch belly, Sanford's(TM) paste, ectoplasm, etc, etc, etc,) the LAST thing I need is a million choices of anything.

what color is ectoplasm?

However....on reflection....could they do this with pantyhose?

*pushes buttons for sandalfoot extra-sheer off-black cotton-crotch petite Queen with added caffeine*

All those buttons confuse me so much I need to drink a bottle of Smart Water just to get a soda.

It depends on the light.

*snork* @ Betsy

Meanie tB - I didn't know that I was going where you were going. Did you go the the bathroom too? Great minds think alike? .

*piddles on the floor, holds 'bad sign' and stands in the corner*

Dudes (and Dudettes)!

Am I the only one thinking BEER here? I love trying different types-Belgian (up to six fingers, Dubel, Triple, und kase), Octoberfest (in June), Weisen (with or without rasberry/ lemon), IPA, Stout, and any or all of the above!

mmmmmm, beer!

Herb! There's really no need to piddle on the floor when we LIVE IN THE AMAZING WORLD OF TOMORROW, now, is there?

I thought if they had a rum or makers marks button for the cola I'm in!

C-John, I'm probably a Luddite (not to be confused with a BudLight) when it comes to beer. I like the masters to offer me their best to choose from, although if they can work out the technology to get a perfect bottled Black & Tan, that would be something!

HUGE *SNORK* @ KDF - Thanks!

"wipes coffee off computer screen and uses other side of paper towel to mop piddle dribble"

I see a CSI episode in the making when somebody makes one with poison in it.

Yet another amazing find in Hamlet by my computer (see the Shakespeare thread for the first one):

But soft, Brian J. Conant seemeth like
Enjoyeth he his product whilst his photo snapped.

And it found this from Romeo and Juliet:

But, soft, what wind through yonder window breaks?
It is Brian J. Conant and his charcoal filter.

great...just when i was getting the hang of using the dvd player remote...they decide to complicate my soda

Gary- Actually, I was there at the photo shoot. Here's what the audio sounded like:

Re Betsy's 1st - reminds me of Home Improvement when Jill, Al, and Tim are discussing the subtle shade/tone differences between apricot, kumquat, and loquat.
SNORK @ Betsy's 2nd!

Gee, if you were wearing the update you could never let a guy get to 3rd base, could you?

Didn't read article, just looked at picture

*moves all assets into flat-d stock*

Forgot how to hyperlink AGAIN . . . and the blog police disappeared my posted link . . . the morning is not going well . . .

*goes back to corner feeling obscene but not heard*

What do you get if you press NO buttons?

Flat-D is a product guaranteed to reduce the divorce rate in America by at least 3%!

Wow what timing! I've been waiting to be Last and I finally made it! Yes! I'm guessing I win something or something!
You'll excuse me while I enjoy a sip of my Lemon-Lime-Vanilla-Cherry-Tangerine-Orange-Grape-Coconut-Diet-Water!
Overuse of Inappropriate punctuation and capitalization is not a crime! Apparently!

Tophermo, Please. Don't. Get. The. Language. Experts. Started!

Shoot, I thought I was Last!

I was going to comment, but would hate to disappoint Tophermo.

i'm laghhuing tooo hard to type rite. oh please. petunia -smelling farts. oh please.

Can you imagine the fellas firing at will?


KDF's link was deeply disturbing and I will now look suspiciously at any water bottle holders.

Ha ha ha ha ha! Good one, MathMom. Computer junk! Wooooo. Gotta catch my breath.

Downside to the soda: If someone throws you the bottle and you catch it in midair... Poof! Instant All-Flaver soda.
See you tonight for 24: Jack Goes Audry Hunting.

Morgana - You're welcome.

Quote: “I had become a hermit after a very embarrassing experience I had happen to me. I avoided meetings and made my office off limits to everyone except my personal secretary.

Lucky personal secratary.

Great. I hope they give this product it's own charcoal filtered isle, because it's gonna be populated by stinky, itchy-crotched people with low metabolism.

Ahhhhh, there's nothing like the smell of methane, tuna and underachievers in the morning!

Punkin, are you implying that an irritated crotch causes underachievement?

*snork* @ Dave for 'flatulance odor control'

(doesn't this guy get it that it ain't the odor that causes the embarrassment...it's the noise. So what would he invent...a pair of underpants that plays "Hail to the Chief" everytime the wearer f*rts?)

Can't someone combine the Flat-D w/the soda bottle and then you could dial up a choice of odors for each episode of flatulence: strawberry, chocolate, lavender, refried beans -- hey wait, got that already...

The comments to this entry are closed.

Terms of Service | Privacy Policy | Copyright | About The Miami Herald | Advertise