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March 14, 2006


Excellent job of commenting by you commenters, especially the amazing Steve. As I understand it, several more major characters kicked the bucket and NONE OF THEM WAS AUDREY. Also it has become clear that the epicenter of terrorism in the U.S. is the U.S. Counter Terrorism Unit. Maybe they need to move it to an uninhabited area, such as Canada.

Anyway, thanks again for your efforts. Ridley and I are strumpeting in Ireland. We have been informed that today we will be interviewed by a turkey named Dustin. I am not making this up.


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oh for christ's SAKE dave, i wouldn't consider canada uninhabited. as it stands, in seven hours i will be surrounded by enibriated rabbis with cans of silly string and hundreds of shrieking children with noisemakers. this..is teaching? i long for uninhabited....incidentally, how about jack taking up a new career as a synchronized swimmer on the u.s. olympic team? jeez, talk about holding yer breath.


There is CTU down the street from me. Also, there are two Del Tacos across the street from each other down the street from me too. Should I be concerned? Or should I just keep some tuna and powdered milk under my bed?

"So, tomorrow's schedule.
Dustin the turkey interviews you.
Dustin sound like a good time?"

Who is 'they' in the 'they need to move'? Because I would be all for it, if the 'they' was only Jack. There are so many people up here who could use a shot in the thigh. Or scissors in the neck. Or whatever other torture a Sutherland can come up with. It's only fair, the boy grew up here, you know. He has to come home sometime.

Not that I have seen 24, since I fell asleep during the first ten minutes of the pilot of season 1. Still, I absolutely know the bloggits here make it more fun than it ever could be, and 'shot in the thigh' has now become gleeful shorthand to my spousal unit, who doesn't even read this blog.

(Don't be offended, the spouse doesn't read anything, even my work.)

As for the turkey, tell him to stay well away from Mrs Robinson. Also Tom Cruise.

Inebriated rabbis with cans of silly string??? Obviously all my Canadian sterotypes are WAY out of date.

"Oh, we're canuck rabbis, and we're O.K.
We daven all night, and drink all day

At Purim, we spray Silly String
And let the kids run loose
We freely quaff our Molson's
And dine on kosher moose"

(Chorus; and many more verses, at least judging
from Colette's post)

Dustin the turkey? He's the irish equivalent of barney, but not quite so disturbingly pink. Are you giving any lectures while in Dublin?

Happy Pi day everyone!! (Yeah I know it's geeky, but it's the best I could come up with at 7 AM)

"Dustin(g) the turkey." Sounds slightly obscene.

Lynn was a bad pudgy boy. (Hey, what happened to that buff build he had in 50 FIRST DATES?)
I don't know how the crack sister and boyfriend managed to so quickly and silently hock Lynn's CTU card to the very terrorists who needed it so badly to carry out their nefarious scheme? Did the Crackers find a phone number in a public restroom? Or did they advertise it on eBay?
Kill the hobbit...Kill the hobbit...(sung in Elmer Fudd voice)
How did Henderson manage to simulate dying (from Body Shut Down Procedures Manual) so convincingly and then pop back to life with full strength like a Horror Movie Monster?
Will President Nixon go off the deep end and his wife and the Veep struggle for control of the nation?

Happy Pi Day, CoastRaven. You are not alone!

for details go here: http://davebarry.com/events.html

Hm.. Green beer for St. Patty's Day--I wonder what kind of beer would be best for Pi Day? Of course it would have to be served in vessels with circular cross sections, with all the spherical bubbles rising like mini hellium balloons, in celebration

Happy Pi day Coast and Antonio.

(What IS Pi day?...any relation to the Pi from math?...and why would it need a day?)

I love the idea of Pi Day!

Let the celebration commence: Pi Beer

And to post somewhat on topic:

Dustin the Turkey

Collette...whatever circle of hell you're in at the moment with the rabbis and the kids and the noisemakers, I just want you to know that you started me going on "I'm a lumberjack" and now it's not gonna leave. I'm sure it was inadvertent, so I won't hold it against you.
P.S. Teaching is a Noble Profession, and You are Molding the Minds of Tomorrow. Just keep repeating that silently until they run out of Silly String. Then shoot them in the thigh.
*exits, humming "...and go to the lava-TREE"*

Could we have Turkey Pi?

*snork* @ U.O

How about pizza pi?

it is 3-14 - thats Pi - technically, Pi MINUTE is 3-14 at 1:59, but thats lust silly

even Just silly


somebody tell don H that if the 24 plot didn't have holes, there would be no plot.... oh, wait.....

CR: I liked the "lust silly" better. ;)

Silly Lust wbagnfarb?

I cannot believe they killed off Tony. Mind you, I'm still mourning Michelle as well although I never did warm up to Edgar. I mean, his name is Edgar for heaven's sake. But Tony!

And please keep CTU down there. We peaceful Canadians would rather you just keep your terrorists down there please. We'll stick with our moose.

The Amazing Steve - Wow. Congratulations

For you, Don hinkle - excellent!

SN -

... but ... isn't Jack Bauer a Canadian?

Thanks, Dave!

Why can Jack leave the air vent and venture into the contaminated area and then return to the air vent safely. When hobbit boy did that... curtains. Also kissing your daughter after walking around in a neurotoxin stew may not be in the manual.

From me:
The biggest problems I saw with last night was that while folk (Jack and Rudy) were running here and there inside the building holding their breath, why did't they head for an exit, dammit!!! Especially Rudy and rent-a-cop in red (you know if you have that role you're probably gonna die...AND DUDE ACTUALLY HAD LINES TO SPEAK!). And did they just vent that gas out into the atmosphere (or was it truly neutralized)? Or why didn't they make a break for the armory, where they said the masks were located? Either Rudy or Jack?! And you're right! Glo and I looked at each other in utter disbelief when Buckaroo Bonzai opened his eyes and then stabbed the hell outta Tony (NO! THEY KILLED TONY!!!!) with that big needle. AND WHY THE HELL DIDN'T JACK BRING THE DUCT TAPE BACK TO THE CONFERENCE ROOM WITH HIM??!!! Taping up the door would have saved them at least a little time. And do you mean that none of that gas clings to your clothing? Man, everybody (viewers) HATES Kim. You shoulda seen her in season 2, I think it was. She was kidnapped about 37 times in 24 hours!

And from my frat Steve:

Jack Bauer is always calling for help...jeeez. Can't the writers make him more self-sufficient?
Prez is a wimp. Mrs. Prez has bigger go-nads...
CSU took longer than a half hour to get there.
How could they let Robocop getaway. As drugged up as he was, there is no way he would've been able to escape...
Rudy deserved to die. He should've reported his key card stolen. duh!

Dave and Ridley are gone, they're not here
Over in Ireland, they're strumpeting (drinking beer)
Interviewed by a turkey
Named Dustin, that's malarkey
And we're left discussing 24 right here.


I am becoming concerned with the disregard for fat guys on the show, as a fat guy, i am beginning to worry.

Neal - suggest you don't wear a Star Trek red shirt and walk through rooms with blue underlighting.

So here is my question they said that the rooms that had the gas masks and the shots was infected....so why didnt the people like lynn who were going to die anyway go there and try to get to the masks?


Comments from us ol' farts on the short bus.

Madam Haig takes over CTU, Jack escapes along with Tony who is still alive, just temporarily stupid.

VP Scary tells Prez Weenie he is a bad boy and to go sit in the corner and let the 'real men' run the country. Prez Weenie folds and goes to his room to cry.

VP Scary becomes president de jure and declares martial law. Makes RoboBuckaroo Head of Homeland Security. RoboBuckaroo takes over shooting people in the thigh for government. Madanm Haig works for VP Scary and operates CTU for VP

Bad Guys actually work for VP (Prez) Scary. Nerve gas is used in Sacremento to kill entire California legislature. Nobody notices so they gas LA. Nobody cares so they gas Las Vegas. People panic and so VP Scary's plan is complete and he is crowned King Scary. Madam Haig remains in charge of CTU.

Jack and Tony together overthrow entire government of King Scary. Jack shoots RoboBuckaroo in thigh and then Tony shoots RoboBuckaroo in head. Both are satisfied with a job well done.

Season ends with First Cleavage declared President Cleavage with Aaron from Secret Service as VP. Former Prez Weenie is placed in mental institution. Tony is head of Homeland Security. Jack is declared dead once again so he can go back to his original girlfriend.

daisymae -

Yes. From math class. All I remember is that it's 3.14159 and was the answer to everything, until the answer was switched to 42, which is shorter and easier to remember. :)

it is 3-14 - thats Pi - technically, Pi MINUTE is 3-14 at 1:59, but thats lust silly.

And 26 seconds. But yes lusting for Pi day is silly (at least I think that's what you meant)

"Also it has become clear that the epicenter of terrorism in the U.S. is the U.S. Counter Terrorism Unit. Maybe they need to move it to an uninhabited area, such as Canada."

They CAN'T move CTU HQ because it is Dimensionally Transcedent (think TARDIS in "Doctor Who")... CTU is currently magically within 45 minutes of everywhere in Los Angeles, all of Nevada, and that place in Iowa where the rockets got stolen...Also the vehicles at CTU have the special "no red light" button to press, and they know to drive down the supersecret LA roads with very light traffic...

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