ATTENTION, LADIES LOOKING FOR THE PERFECT MAN
You could search your entire life and never find someone like this.
(Thanks to Karen W., who recommends the "hair" option.)
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You could search your entire life and never find someone like this.
(Thanks to Karen W., who recommends the "hair" option.)
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(looks around again)
First!
Posted by: daisymae | February 03, 2006 at 01:14 PM
Daisymae's going for the hat trick...!!
Posted by: Mr. Completely | February 03, 2006 at 01:17 PM
Fantastic - one word!
Posted by: audidealer | February 03, 2006 at 01:23 PM
wow, previewing the clips really chews through the toilet paper.
JU
Posted by: Johnny Urinalcakes | February 03, 2006 at 01:25 PM
How much toilet paper does this guy need ?
Posted by: Texas | February 03, 2006 at 01:25 PM
Ah, WHO? keeps a pony in his living room?
*gaaaag*
Posted by: kibby F5™ | February 03, 2006 at 01:30 PM
whoa
Posted by: MOTW | February 03, 2006 at 01:32 PM
I guess the pony helps him "occupy" his time while he's waiting for you... .
Posted by: john | February 03, 2006 at 01:33 PM
:::sniff::: man! That stuff just gets right here, don't it?
Oh...I need a tissue.
Posted by: Schadeboy | February 03, 2006 at 01:34 PM
Wow, I am sooooooooooooo relaxed after my virtual foot massage. Can I just pay this guy to come over and talk at me for awhile?
Posted by: TrillianAstra | February 03, 2006 at 01:34 PM
Um, Mr. Urinalcakes, and Mr. Texas: It isn't toilet paper. He's the Brawny Paper Towel guy. Gals of the feminine persuasion are well acquainted with him.
Posted by: Nannie (Not Dave) | February 03, 2006 at 01:39 PM
... and getting better acquainted with the Productivity Enhancer ...
Posted by: MOTW | February 03, 2006 at 01:41 PM
*Wiping tears - of laughter - off my cheeks*
Wonderfully absurd. Sinfully smarmy.
I watched the "Hair" clip twice. The second time I imagined it as a "Brokeback Bounty" scene.
Seriously, NTTAWWT!
Posted by: scat | February 03, 2006 at 01:43 PM
OK - I understand that it is Brawny paper towels, and the guy is hot and buff, and I understand (and even enjoy performing) a foot massage... BUT WHERE THE HELL DOES THE PONY IN THE LIVING ROOM FIT IN in this this fantasy ladies!?!?!?!
Posted by: CoastRaven | February 03, 2006 at 01:43 PM
Nannie, you know what they say:
Everything's bigger in Texas!
Posted by: john | February 03, 2006 at 01:44 PM
CoastRaven - who cares? just say the part about the foot massage again...
Posted by: Nannie | February 03, 2006 at 01:51 PM
it's a real blog-and-pony show...
Posted by: insomniac | February 03, 2006 at 01:52 PM
**did I say that out loud?**
Posted by: Nannie | February 03, 2006 at 01:52 PM
INsom: *SNORK*
Posted by: daisymae | February 03, 2006 at 01:55 PM
I understand (and even enjoy performing) a foot massage
Make ya feel better Nannie?
Posted by: CoastRaven | February 03, 2006 at 01:55 PM
Made ALL of us feel better, CR
Posted by: daisymae | February 03, 2006 at 01:58 PM
Mmmm. Foot massage. CoastRaven, I will consider throwing over my husband for you...
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | February 03, 2006 at 01:59 PM
Oh My Gosh! Let's not even joke about this--"Thinking about you." gave me shivers.
Happy Valentine's Day to Me!
Posted by: Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa | February 03, 2006 at 01:59 PM
Gag me with a Ginsu knife
the whole set!!
Posted by: American In Provence | February 03, 2006 at 01:59 PM
Where's the men's version? You know, the one with Rosie the Waitress following us around the house, wiping up our spills with a sheet of Bounty?
Actually, in real life that wouldn't be so bad...
Posted by: rundogrun | February 03, 2006 at 02:00 PM
I don't know... the guy looks like a lumberjack
to me...
Posted by: Mad Soapboxer | February 03, 2006 at 02:01 PM
Nurse Tammy - Are you by any chance near Disneyland Hong Kong?
Posted by: CoastRaven | February 03, 2006 at 02:02 PM
We'll just pass Tammy over the fence...
Posted by: john | February 03, 2006 at 02:04 PM
A store that sells husbands to single women opens where a woman may go to choose from many available men. At the at the entrance is a description of how the store operates.
There are only six floors. It states that the attributes of the men increase as the shopper ascends the flights. There is, however, a catch: As you open the door to any floor you may choose any man from that floor, but if you go up a floor, you cannot go back down except to exit the building.
So, Jane decides to go to the Husband Store to find herself a mate.
She gets to the first floor and the sign says:
"Floor 1 - These men have jobs."
She figures she can do better, so she goes up the next flight.
"Floor 2 - These men have jobs and love kids."
Not bad, she decides, but what about companionship? She moves on.
"Floor 3 - These men have jobs, love kids and are extremely good looking."
Wow, she thinks, but feels compelled to keep going. She goes to the 4th floor and sign reads:
"Floor 4 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking and help with the housework."
"Oh, mercy me!" she exclaims, "I can hardly stand it!"
Still, she goes to the 5th floor, where the sign reads:
"Floor 5 - These men have jobs, love kids, are extremely good looking, help with the housework, and have a strong romantic streak."
She is so tempted to stay, but she goes to the sixth floor and the sign reads:
Floor 6 - You are visitor 46,012th to this floor today. There are no men on this floor. This floor exists solely to prove that women are impossible to please. Thank you for shopping at the Husband Store. Watch your step when you exit the building and have a nice day!
Posted by: Mr. Completely | February 03, 2006 at 02:08 PM
Nope. I've never gone to any Disney park. I always sort of hoped Mickey would wander into Looney Tunes territory and get smashed by an anvil or something.
Posted by: Nurse Tammy | February 03, 2006 at 02:10 PM
Mr. Completely - THAT might just get you that extra room on the house you have been buggin the Mrs. for.
*snork*
Posted by: CoastRaven | February 03, 2006 at 02:12 PM
Mr. C - with that one, you are in the basement.
The Valentine's Day one was pretty funny, especially when he translates the name of the star from Italian.
*goes back to find the clip with the pony.*
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | February 03, 2006 at 02:12 PM
Mr. C: *SNORK*
Posted by: daisymae | February 03, 2006 at 02:13 PM
I'm not so hard to please, Mr. Complete-Me. I would have stopped at floor #4 and taken the stairs the rest of the way.
Posted by: Lisa Bisa Fo Fisa | February 03, 2006 at 02:19 PM
For some inexplicable reason I can easily image that Brawny guy picking up a chain saw going totally Hannibal Lecter.
"Hi, I'm so glad you're here. I was out shopping today and I saw something that made me think of you... I just had to buy it." RRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrRRRRRRRRRrrrrrrrRRRRRRR
Posted by: random "wishes he were Dave" thunking | February 03, 2006 at 02:22 PM
*loving* the Brawny site! Glad to see that the marketing people over there have a sense of humor.
"Pony in the living room" - sounds like it could be a euphemism for something undesirable. "I met this great guy! He's so sensitive and sweet, but I think he might have a pony in the living room ..."
Posted by: Cheryl | February 03, 2006 at 02:24 PM
Am I the only one who had trouble keeping up with the postings today? I'm worn out already.
One more thing - the guy in this movie totally creeps me out. It's so premeditated, he's like a stalker. I'd take tck over this guy any day.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | February 03, 2006 at 02:24 PM
Hey CoastRaven -- my initials are CR, so I keep thinking people are talking to me.
Like I'm not confused enough when I bumble through the blog. :-)
Posted by: Cheryl (not Dave or Coastraven) | February 03, 2006 at 02:26 PM
this guy is in need of some serious stylist attention... right after he gives me another foot massage and shows me where he's hiding that pony.
Posted by: crossgirl | February 03, 2006 at 02:29 PM
Dont worry Cheryl - I hear people talking to me all the time too - even when there isnt anyone around... hmmmmmmm
Posted by: CoastRaven | February 03, 2006 at 02:31 PM
trying desperately not to say "I'll be your pony crossgirl"... I just wont say it... nope!
Posted by: CoastRaven | February 03, 2006 at 02:33 PM
**SNORK** @ CR. (not cheryl.) you'll excuse me while i go drain the coke from my keyboard.
Posted by: crossgirl | February 03, 2006 at 02:42 PM
Mr. C ~ The version I saw had a little more at the end...
Across the street there was a new "Wife store" for men.
First floor sign says "these women love sex"
Second floor sign says "these women love sex and have lots of money"
No man has ever gone above the second floor.
Posted by: southerngirl | February 03, 2006 at 02:43 PM
Cheryl~ Don't use that word. Now you're confusing me. It's like in school; whenever things were outlined in books using letters of the alphabet, the teacher would say "B" and I'd be like, "Huh?"
This is too hilarious. He is kind of creepy though. I'm gonna send it to my friend, then go back and play with it some more.
Mr. C~ Where might I find this store? With my pre-knowledge, I can stop at floor five. And since I'll be the first to stop, I should have an excellent selection. Thanks for the tip.
Posted by: Bumble | February 03, 2006 at 02:44 PM
This lumberjack guy is better than my marriage counselor. I think I now get this whole marriage thing. I'm cured.
Posted by: Marriage911 | February 03, 2006 at 02:46 PM
*high five to southerngirl*
Posted by: Bumble | February 03, 2006 at 02:46 PM
"Don't be tellin' me 'bout no foot massage. I got my technique down and everything. I don't be ticklin' or nothing."
Posted by: Shredder | February 03, 2006 at 02:47 PM
AnnieWBH ~ I agree with you. I think he's waaay creepy.
(Oh, and TCK says "hey") ;)
Posted by: southerngirl | February 03, 2006 at 02:47 PM
You'd think that people
Would have had enough
Of the Brawny stud'n a thong
I look around me and I see it isn't so (oh no)
Some people wanna fill the world
With the Brawny stud'n a thong
And what's wrong with that?
I'll let ya know
So here I go again
He loves you, He loves you
I can explain the feelings of pain to thee;
Will you see?
Ah, he can't give more,
He gave it all to thee now can't you see?
What's wrong with that?
You need to know
Brawny man'll come in a minute
Most times you won't come at all
He only knows that when he's in it
It isn't pretty, it isn't pretty,
It isn't pretty at all
How can I tell you about the Brawny one?
How can I tell you about the Brawny one?
Posted by: Christobol | February 03, 2006 at 02:47 PM
Bumble - Hate to break it to you, but the store, like the perfect man, is only mythical.
Kinda like a unicorn, only without the horn.
On second thought, never mind.
Posted by: Mr. Completely | February 03, 2006 at 02:48 PM
I started a couple of those clips, hurled, and gave 'em up, so I don't know if there is anything in there that answers the question THIS inquiring mind (such as it is) wants to know: the pony he's cohabiting with, is it male or female?
Posted by: Mad Soapboxer | February 03, 2006 at 02:49 PM
"Pony in the living room" - sounds like it could be a euphemism for something undesirable. "I met this great guy! He's so sensitive and sweet, but I think he might have a pony in the living room ..."
Excellent
Posted by: mudstuffin | February 03, 2006 at 02:49 PM
Why C-bol, that was such a silly little love song!
Posted by: southerngirl | February 03, 2006 at 02:50 PM
S'girl - is he under your bed again? He's suspiciously quiet today.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | February 03, 2006 at 03:05 PM
Man. I don't know how Brawny Man and the camera person managed to shoot all that without breaking down in uncontrollable spasms of laughter.
southerngirl~ We should get together and film some kind of stepford wife counterpart to this. I've got the perfect costume: Sleeveless a-line button-down dress that comes mid-calf; white with black polka-dots. Pearl necklace and studs, white pumps.
"How was your day, dear? Oh, I know. Sitting in front of that computer blogging all day long is a rough gig. I've got some beer and homemade fried chicken set up on the TV tray there. Why don't you sit down and watch the game? I'll massage your shoulders."
Nah, wouldn't work. We'd be in stitches before we got halfway through.
Posted by: Bumble | February 03, 2006 at 03:08 PM
I ... even enjoy performing a foot massage
Just thought I would throw that out there again
Posted by: CoastRaven | February 03, 2006 at 03:14 PM
Annie, we're...uh, I mean he's...uh, you see, we were just...and then what happened was ...um...Just never you mind what he's doing, um, I mean where he is! *winks*
Bumble, that would be a RIOT!!! Count me in!
Posted by: southerngirl | February 03, 2006 at 03:20 PM
CoastRaven~ Come on over anytime. ;-)
Posted by: Bumble | February 03, 2006 at 03:24 PM
Count on it Bumble!
Posted by: CoastRaven | February 03, 2006 at 03:31 PM
D'oh! Brawny Man loses points for the spider clip in the custom section. You're supposed to squish the darn things, not release them into the wild so they can come back in!
Posted by: Bumble | February 03, 2006 at 03:43 PM
I'm with you Bumble - you'd think he of ALL people would have a paper towel to squish it with!! (sorry thats "with which to squish it")
Posted by: CoastRaven | February 03, 2006 at 03:48 PM
Where's the foot massage? I found the pony in "that thing you're going through". Is the foot massage a custom one? god, that Brawny guy has no brains, but he makes up for it....
Posted by: Kathy P. | February 03, 2006 at 03:57 PM
CR, enjoy bumbles feet, but remember, you're (not your) MY pony!
Posted by: crossgirl | February 03, 2006 at 03:57 PM
"My little pony, my little pony..."
Posted by: Bumble | February 03, 2006 at 04:02 PM
Our secretary here pointed out that Mr. Brawny, aka Mr. Sensitive Pants looks an awful lot like Jeff Foxworthy, although I imagine his take on "That thing you're going through with your pony" might be a tad bit different.
Posted by: john | February 03, 2006 at 04:05 PM
crossgirl - ready for a ride?
Posted by: CoastRaven | February 03, 2006 at 04:44 PM
66 posts and no one has mentioned "The Continental"
Ok, Would you like some cham-pog-nay?
Posted by: Shredder | February 03, 2006 at 08:12 PM
I sent "random breakdown" to a friend of mine who is having a bad day.
I have never encountered any problem that can not be over come by a good looking man, a loud guitar, or a large slab of cake.
Combine all three and were talking problem solving on world peace levels...
Posted by: Laura Vona | February 04, 2006 at 12:30 PM
God bless Brawny. Despite the fact it's pure schmaltz, I still had to resist the urge to crawl into the monitor.
Posted by: DC Susan | February 09, 2006 at 11:32 PM
if u are the man for ne here is my number4880178 or 3893884
Posted by: dana | June 16, 2007 at 04:04 PM
cll me 4880178 or 3893884
Posted by: dana | June 16, 2007 at 04:06 PM
i am mr peter , am businessman i will like to meet u call me if u wish totake to me am very atltice
Posted by: kenny | June 16, 2008 at 08:42 AM
The Valentine's Day one was pretty funny, especially when he translates the name of the star from Italian.
Posted by: Dll | March 17, 2009 at 03:14 AM