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January 31, 2006


It's a good thing somebody finally put a stop to this nonsense. We must not, under any circumstances, have a nice day.

(Thanks to CoastRaven)


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How about if we put a stop to the guy who complained? I suspect there would be a lot of volunteers who would be glad to "wave" him out of the country...

We could reserve a special, one-fingered wave for the guy who complained.

That's it. The world has officially come to end. Why must we put up with idiots? I'm with Nannie^^^

"The television station reported that the man who called police drove by the intersection Monday morning videotaping White."

Ummmm - which is more of a hazaard to the children. Wavinig at the crossing guard, or videotaping her with one hand, holding your coffee in the other and driving with your knee?

(And I got credit WHOO HOO!!)

Actually, I was THINKING about something else for the complainer but I toned it down in the interests of trying not to set a violent example for the more impressionable readers here... but, the heck with it. I say we drop a grenade in his shorts.

Good grief ! I wave at people all the time in my neighorhood. Now, it may be offensive to someone ? A wave ? I mean....a friendly wave ?

...claiming that her waving was distracting drivers, making it unsafe for the children.

C'mon. I kinda think the guy has a point. (I must be getting old.)

Hmm. Sounds like this guy's a little too easily distracted. And has too much time on his hands.

We've got a guy in our town they call Underpass Joe. He stands beside the underpass all day and waves at passing motorists. I always try to wave back at him. If waving at people is what he wants to do with his life, it doesn't cost me anything to be nice and return the greeting.

Sheesh, the guy needs to get over it. Now, if her waving had caused an accident or confusion of any kind, I could understand that, but he needs to get a life. And learn how to drive. Distractions happen.


I say we send Jack B. after him. After a thigh shot, the driver will think twice.

Well, she's a crossing guard, though. What if she's waving "STOP! WAIT!" because you're about to hit a kid?

Just sayin' it makes sense, in a way.

Please send your rotten tomatoes to:
Tamara Rhymes With Camera
c/o...etc, you get the joke.

The news channel site has a survey link, which currently shows about 11 to 1 in favor of waving (~5700+ vs. ~500+).

Make your vote count!

Now, if her waving had caused an accident or confusion of any kind, I could understand that,

So, only after a child is hurt, then? Sorry. I have a little one. I'm scared to death for him. I don't think jail time for speeding in a school zone is out of the question.

The television station reported that the man who called police drove by the intersection Monday morning videotaping White.

Advice to dude: GET A LIFE!

Anyone with enough time on his hands to do a 'drive by video' has needs.

*goes off to vote*

Someone said that if her waving had caused an accident, that'd be different.

I strongly disagree.

We live in a nation of 300,000,000 people. The most unlikely, anomolous incidents are still going to happen occasionally.

EVEN IF there is some bizarre set of circumstances which lead to an accident, the overall likelyhood of incident should be the /sole/ consideration, in passing laws or otherwise messing with people's choices.

We are becoming a nation of idiotic regulations BECAUSE we are 300,000,000 strong, and therefore bizarre little coincidences are commonplace. Every time the gene pool is improved by someone sticking a Pokeball over their mouth and suffocating, EVERYONE ends up getting stuck with a ban on wholely harmless hemispheres.

It's idiotic.

Words of the Sentient:

"My country, right or wrong," is a thing that no patriot would think of saying except in a desperate case. It is like saying, "My mother, drunk or sober." -- G. K. Chesterton

Well people are still waving at her so I hardly see how this helps people's driving skills any. And I'm with CoastRaven, they should put a stop to videotaping while driving before they put a stop to waving. I hope he was cited for dangerous driving.

Right on Kaz!

Bring back Lawn Darts!

actually I agree with you 100% stupid is as stupid does....

Sheesh, and I thought I overreacted.

Brainy, The story reads, "When she wasn't walking, she waved to drivers." I read that to mean that their were no children present. Have you ever been past an intersection with a crossing gaurd? There are times when they are not helping kids cross but rather standing there waiting for the next bunch. I believe it was during this "donw time" that she was waving.

I think this guy was just an old fuddy duddy.

Hey Kaz...
But she is my mother, drunk or sober.

Give me a break....the society today in which we live in is largely composed of weak-minded and politically correct pansies. Twenty five years ago we would have laughed off this guy as a "grouch" or a "kook" and told him what he can do with his petty complaint. Nuff said.

Zare vil be no waving !!!!

Sorry, I have a tendency of not trying to understand the "other" point of view until after I tell them they're wrong.


I say we take Mr Crabby Appleton out and give him an atomic wedgie - see if he finds THAT distracting.

I think Lardog has it on the head -

Nice lady in the very visible orange vest stands on the corner and waves, wave back and proceed with caution. Or ignore her and proceed with caution.

Nice lady in the very visible orange vest stands in the middle of the road with the large red also very visible STOP sign held out... STOP!

If somebody's smiling and waving, it looks a lot different than somebody shouting and waving their hands to stop a car. Anyway, you're supposed to go slow and pay extra attention if there's a potential for kids around, anyway.

sct72, I'm with you. Even after telling them they're wrong I still don't try to understand.

... there's nothing worse than not understanding AND being wrong about it!

So everyone in town will be driving by her intersection to see if she's waving or not and/or to protest the decision. NOW we have a REAL traffic hazard...
I gotta go with common sense on this one. Waving is not dangerous if done properly. There's a big difference between a Rose Parade wave and a "STOP!" wave. Maybe it's distracting to drivers trying to talk on their cell phones. Maybe it should be distracting to remind them of where they are!

So, if I have this correct, the man is against the crossing gaurd waving because its distracting and wants her to stop..Well, if he thinks her waving is distracting and wants her to stop, what about an American Flag waving atop a flag pole? Isn't that what this country is all about? And isn't condemning waving really condemning America and the American way of life itself? Well I for one am not going to sit back while someone condemns America !

The real question is:

What would Jack do to the crossing guard?

What would Jack do to the kook with the camera (that rhymes with...sorry TamRWC, couldn't resis).

This lady should be drawn and quartered!! I mean c'mon, enough already!

I am so sick and tired of going to ballgames and being forced to do the wave. Leave me alone and let me watch the game! Plus, my back hurts from getting up and down, not the young pup I used to be. Sure, it was fun for a short time in the mid-80's, but no longer! Now, they're trying to bring it to a street corner in my neighborhood? Not on my watch, buster!

And who does a single person wave anyway?! Crazy old bat!

No good deed goes unpunished.

kibby thinks the next time she sees someone pass by with a video camara (ryming with our beloved Tamara) she wave WITH the Stop sign and IF it accidently slips out of her gloved hand.....

don't you kibby?

kibby: Yea.

Annie said: "Waving is not dangerous if done properly."


I first heard this story this morning while my boss was listening to talk radio. The host was ranting and raving about this in an extremely unattractive manner, as though he were parlaying the details of a truly scandalous and earth-shattering event. I'm vaguely interested in suggesting waving become illegal--and maybe nodding, too--just to see if Talk Radio Guy can scream himself into a heart attack.

Come to think of it, I find grumpy old men distracting.
I'm a tad biased on this one. A local crossing guard had just finished her shift and was driving home when a high school girl ran a red light and broadsided the crossing guard's car. Never even hit her brakes. I was the sole witness, and tried to help the poor lady until the paramedics arrived. She had back and knee injuries and was going into shock. She was never able to work again as a guard. The topper - high school girlie tried to say it was the crossing guard's fault. If I hadn't entered a deposition, she would have won, too.

("Penny Lane")

Sharon White helps out children as a crossing guard.
As the people drive by she gives them a wave
And of the drivers that motor by
Most will wave back "Hi"!

Until one day a man said she was distracting
Him from his breakfast and his calls on the cell phone.
He started taping Sharon in the act
Of a smile exchange. Very strange.

Sharon White is in our hearts and in our brains
There out on the Lawrence, Kansas plains
We sit and mutter "What a jerk!"

The cops told Sharon she really shouldn't wave so much.
At least when kids were there who possibly might see.
Adults being nice for it's own sake.
Give me a break!


*SNORK!* @ Sean!

Lawrence, KS, is a lovely little college town (KU - the Jayhawks) not too far from the KC Metro area. It's chief downside is that it's home to a *lot* of people who are absolutely certain that they know what's best for everyone else.

*goes to vote again*


I hope the complainer gets a copy of the results.

I think we all need to cut Mr. Grumpypants some slack. It was obvious to me that he was already distracted by using his left hand to try and steady his foil hat while adjusting his white noise generator with his right hand, and damned if the aliens didn't send down an agent with orange mind-control gloves, grinning like a gargoyle, beckoning to him "Join us, join us!"

The problem was prolly that her waving caused reciprocol rampart wavage/jiggle. Just fantacizing, eh, sayin'.....

I think we can all discuss this like the civilized adults that we are.

Don't you Mr. Grumpypants Poo Poo!?

so are we seriously arguing about whether this nice lady waving to drivers (which BTW, is a common courtesy in SOME parts of the country) is a threat to children? seriously?

Brainy, The story reads, "When she wasn't walking, she waved to drivers." I read that to mean that their were no children present.

I read it to mean that kids are about to arrive, or the late kids dashing across the street - who gets hit cause everyone's winking at the crossing guard.

I'm not saying there should be a law, just that I sympathize with those who want to keep kids safer.

Bumpersticker for Kibby™:

I Wave And I Vote!

I think he only has eyes for Ms. CrossingGuard. He's building up the courage to ask her out.

isnt kansas where they believe in "intelligent' design??? i'm going to have to scream.


HE'S arguing about it. WE'RE ridiculing him.... we're good at that!

I'm sure she's not putting the childern's safety 2nd to courtesy. She's a 62 year old that's out there keeping care of children. And then being friendly - in that order.

Unless Mr. Grumpypants is 70+ there shouldn't be alot of winking going on.

Brainy J - I'm with you on wanting to make sure safety of kids crossing or about to cross is not compromised. I've got two school-age daughters, too.

I have more of a beef with the complainer's method, not so much his intent. Wouldn't it have made sense to have a little chat with the guard (I am of course assuming this did not happen) before blowing the whistle to her supervisor?

Hey, MadSoapBoxer...

What say we take the grenade from his shorts and jam it up his ...

Dump some Hot McDonalds Coffee in is shorts, in place of the grenade!

Geezer Alert!
"This is Lawrence. This is Lawrence, Kansas. Is there anybody there? Anybody at all?"
Geezer Bus Day Pass for the one who recognizes that one.

*dashes in from lunch*

*Waves "HI" to all*

*Dashes out*


*Thanks, a lot, Sly.....*

*crashes into his cubicle trying to wave back at slyeyes*

What makes this such an emotional issue?

CoastRaven - is that from "The Day After"? I know Lawrence got nuked in that one...

Bingo Insom!!! Well done! (although you are a rare one indeed)

I'm still likin' the atomic wedgie or grenade solution to that guy's problem.

Comment re: the crossing guard's lot in life, I know a lady who used to have that job and bright orange vest and big red sign or not, people routinely ignored her and she was nearly hit a number of times. She developed a technique where she'd whack the side of the errant car as it passed with that big red (metal) sign, which hopefully served as a reminder that they'd done a no-no.

insomniac - The Day After K-Who lost a game to K-State ... (ba-da-bing, ba-da-boom)

My company has recently adopted a No Tolerance stand on e-mail humor. Anything that could remotely be offensive (inuendo) to anybody must be reported to management. "They're" serious enough that they've walked many people out the door. It's like there's a moratorium on any kind of humor at all.

The office is like a bed of eggshells - nobody wants to laugh. So I'm reading the blog only during lunch break and I happen to see this - oh, man! How appropriate. And y'all's comments - keep 'em coming, please!

What was she waving?
I have been distracted by people waving at me. certain lights for instance.
Or certain peices of metal that can shoot other metals into my skull. I tend to slow down for that. Usually because I am wondering why this person is hunting in the middle of suburbia.

Anyway, I knew a permanently pickled crossing gaurd. She was in her 80s. Her neighbors kept a bottle of wine for her just in case.
If I saw her waving I would have picked her up and driven her home.

lol at sean, way back up there....

As an Iowan, and thus a resident of the Rural Midwest, I have to say that out here it's an unwritten law that you wave to people driving by. (That's why farm houses have porches!) And it's an established custom for people who drive farm vehicles (including pickups) that when you come up on another farm vehicle as you're driving, you wave to the other driver. The complainer must be a transplant not to understand this. Sheesh!

MOTW: re e-mail humor. I've found there are no new jokes anymore. Just basically the same three or four jokes that have been forwarded around the globe over and over and over and over and over.

OK, there are the few rare exceptions. Like that chihuahua stuck in the fat lady's ass; butt that's about it.

While we're talking about crossing guards...

The crossing guard by my daughter's elementary school here in lovely southern Floriduh now uses a walker. Really.

Once I stopped laughing, I got kinda mad.

Durn MOTW - is your boss the Burgermeister Meisterburger?

MOTW - so sorry about your office. It's like '1984' for comedy. There will be no laughing until morale improves. Management cop-out.

Hey Rel. FA, at least it's not a golf cart! THAT would be cool!

I'm from rural Texas, where waving to fellow drivers was an absolute mandate.

I miss that. Stupid Georgia.

If someone actually waved to me here in Georgia, I'd probably have to assume I'd just accidentally run over a litter of adorable two-eyed kittens.


judi posted a new thread.

*waves everbody along*

slyeyes - I find your waving distracting.

You might be a Redneck if ..
- your school cafeteria serves venison
- your cigarette lighter is your stove
You know it's hot in Texas when ..
A brunette, a redhead, and a blonde walk into a bar ..
You know it's hurricane season in Florida when ..
An engineer, a lawyer, and a programmer ..

I dunno 'bout you, sly, but I still need a humor break during my day. And it was nice to be able to share it (was).

Poor, poor MOTW. I'm torn between sending him extra doses of humor and getting him busted for laughing too much as a result. But I am serious - that's a terrible place to work.

* psst - MOTW is a gal of the female persuasion *
* but thanks, I appreciate the sentiment *

Insom, CoastR - I was going to guess "The Day After". I never saw it, but I knew it was "set" in Lawrence.

And being from a small Kansas town (Lawrence isn't all that small) it's common for people to wave in those circumstances. It's also common for people to idle through school crossing zones with their foot off the gas, and the fact the guard is doing it may remind people they are in a school zone and should slow down.

Blue Meanie - Agreed. Flawed method for sure.
Tamara - Why? It's kindness causing anger. For both sides.

A grateful public rejoices... that she wasn't flashing her boobs at drivers. At 62, she'd have to pull down her pants to do that.

Tamara, if you pass by my house, I'll wave to you from my porch swing, ok? And not just 'cause I know ya, but because it's the way we do things here.

Sorry, MOTW. See? That horrible work environment is affedting your feminine side.

I was kinda hoping in an evil way that the complaining man would hit a tree while filming/or be arrested for reckless driving. Plus Sgt. Dan should grow some and stick up for his crossing guard.

For the Record: this Crabby Appleton is a.) a woman b.) not the driver that Punkin Poo wants to administer an atomic wedgie to c.) Not really all that crabby compared to .. say ... MOTW's bosses.

I'm in touch with my feminine side. Luckily, my feminine side's a lesbian (NTTAWWT), so it works out well.

That's funny; my male side is gay. Hmm.

Tamara - So you know what I mean.

Mr C. and Tamara - I'm not sure whether to run away, or pretend to be interested and ask questions - such as, does Mr. C's feminine lesbian side hate men, and, if so, whether she subconsciously works out her frustration at being trapped in a male body by compelling Mr C to keep doing all the things that he knows will get him in trouble with Mrs. The Point, even though he knowsw doing them will get him in trouble...

Wow, this is quite the heated topic. Who knew?

*zips in waaaaay behind on her day*

Hmmmm, this waving business seems to be quite controversial, or else everyone is just on edge because there wasn't enough violence on 24 last night.


Congrats to CoastRaven - hooray for you!
Being posted is great!!!

*waves bye to everyone and quickly zips out*

Hey, Mr C -- Did you know that you won the coveted position of Last on the Jan 4th thread? You never stopped by to claim your prize.

Tamara - I'm sure Mr. C will blame his feminine side for forgetting to pick it up.

This wave performed by a trained professional.

Do not attempt this at home.

Or in school pedestrian crossings.

Annie - No, the feminine side forgets NOTHING.

TCK - I've been married long enough to know what pisses off Mrs. ThePoint... and when Momma ain't happy, ain't NOBODY happy.

Mr C, you got that right, women and elephants never forget!!

Hey, I'm originally from Kansas, so I knew the movie. Yea, me! AND we all waved back home. AND there is a crossing guard here who waves at everybody and it makes my day because nobody else in this blasted state waves. AND Lawrence (Rock Chalk!) isn't small, but very pleasant. AND I've used up my allotment of unneccesary conjunctions for the day.
*waves the wheat*

geez Mr. C - ain't that the truth?

but Mad, um, I'd be awful careful about comparing women to elephants around here - for some reason, I've found the local blogchicks to be somewhat vindictive lately - and they seem to be attacking in packs now

MOTW - it's just another way to get rid of people. I remember them instituing that policy at my old job, and having a few people tell me they didn't want those emails from me "because they don't want to report me". I'm sure as part of that policy they require both the sender & recipient be "let go" if the recipient doesn't report it. After they get rid of as many as they can by "policy", they will just start laying people off. Thankfully I didn't get "reported" by the remaining people, but I did get laid off! Sorry to bring down the blog, but a 'fair warning' from my personal experience!

Monkey boogers!

There, back to "normal".

I think I figured out what the guy's problem was. He had recently been busted for this and was cranky...


Sorry, I havn't figured out how to hyperlink in here so you'll have to cut and paste.

88, no need for the link, I saw that bit a while ago. They failed to note in the article that the guy was wearing a mostly-melted chocolate thong though....

Just the other day, I quite unintentionally stopped with my car's front end sticking in the crosswalk. The crossing guard waved at me with one finger. Maybe I should complain.

"I've found there are no new jokes anymore. Just basically the same three or four jokes that have been forwarded around the globe over and over and over and over and over."

That works for fruitcakes too, right?

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