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December 27, 2005

THERE IS NO BETTER WAY TO SAY "LET'S PARTY, DOG"

...than a pelvic UFO.

(Via Gizmodo)

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better a pelvic ufo than a std

I suspect this is true. At least I hope so.

"The dynamically designed DancingUFO works your abs and waist like no other stomach work out system anywhere."

On the left side of the page there is a listing of other products. Would someone who reads Chinese (or Korean) click on the "Hico" and tell me WTF?

At last! Training wheels for Korean hookers just getting their start. Some of those positions can be quite tricky until you have the hang of it. This clever wheel can be placed where needed to provide extra support when it is needed.

To Pogo:

I don't read Korean, but I think I figured it out from the picture on the lower right of the page showing the superimposed faces. You may think what follows is a sick joke (especially given my last post), but it is a straightforward guess. I think this is a device to lift and elongate the nose. Asian women are seeing more and more examples of beauty and style set by Western models and film/TV actresses. They feel they should have noses that stick out more from their face. The two prongs on the device fit into the nostrils and you can see there are vertical slits where they can move upwards, no doubt "gently and gradually lifting the nose to a new prominent protrusion." I have a hard time believing that this would have any lasting effect other than a slight facial soreness, but beauty products are not subject to the same laws of logic that, say, wearable exercise wheels are.

Interested parties are referred back to the classic Twilight Zone episode "Eye Of The Beholder."

The "Pelvic UFO" sounds like a dance white people do after taking in too wedding reception liquor.

See also, "Dance, Chicken."

Last night the aliens abducted me and sent me to a fat camp planet. I awoke with this thing implanted on me...

Ken - Thanks, and a ride on the Geezer Bus is on me, since we both remember "Eye of the Beholder", unless of course you saw it in later syndication. I saw it "first run" on a B&W TV on a Friday night, somewhere back in the late 50s.

Soon Suzanne Somers will be starring in a new set of infomercials reviving the hula hoop - you heard it here first (and last!)...

Ken & pogo:

I checked out the chinese site and it is a nose related product, kind of a shnozz raiser-upper...
It's to raise the bridge of the nose to give a "more elegant and classic profile" (my translation).

I think i saw this on our evening news a few months ago...

OK, let's go down the geek checklist.

1. It has to be a gadget. Check.

2. It must have an LED. Check.

3. It claims to help make you healthy. Check!

A brilliant trifecta. If only it had a programmable M&M dispenser (with WiFi and automatic reordering), we would have placed orders by now.


jamester -

I was gonna say somethin' about "din't they do this with a hula hoop about 50 years ago, and for a lot less money?" ... but you sorta beat me to it ... altho ... hula hoops are still around (Heh! Pun alert!) and are sometimes used in elementary PE programs, with variable applications, not just as the quasi-dance thingy inducer ...

$50!

A hula hoop is about $3, on a blue-light special ...

Pogo, while I have seen that episode, I'm afraid I'm going to make you feel even more like a geezer when I reveal that my mother was not yet eight months old when it first aired.

http://www.scifilm.org/tv/tz/twilightzone2-6.html

Let's make that a link.

The Eye of the Beholder

notme - I'll be providing guest accommodations for you at the Horseshoe Road Inn.

notme -

How the heck young are you?!?!?!?!

Lesse ... put two and two together, add 12, carry the five ...

Oh.

Well, that's not as bad as I thot @ first ...

(Any geezers catch the musical reference hidden herein?)

BTW ... tnx4 the link ...

William Tuttle? Wasn't he the main character on a single episode of M*A*S*H? VIP seats on the Geezer Bus for anyone who can summerize that plotline. And an extra seat cushion for the first person who can tell us who played the role of Tuttle.

U.O. --

Is this some kind of a test? I'm no dummy, so I'm not going to crash your little party.

Pirate --

I simply cannot believe in the existence of such an episode. You must be trying to solicit some kind of charitable reaction from the crowd. But I would rather jump out of a helicopter without a parachute than give away a plotline.

Holy cow! I just did some Googling. Without much effort, I found four different songs from different time periods that meet the test. Are you geezer enough to be going for the classic American standard as performed by Ella, Frank, and just about every other major vocalist of that era? The kids would be quoting Kanye West or 2 Live Crew.

It's getting harder and harder to find a lyric that hasn't been recycled. But I think Mairzy Doats is still relatively safe.

Ken -

nope ... no test ... that's just fur fun ... If'n y'all cotched it, cool ... if yew din't ... NBD ... and I'm not gonna bother draggin' it out ... it's just a song lyric that has crope into my vernacular and so I use it from time to time ...

Mebbe it'd work better if y'all had been there ... or not ...

again ... NBD ... no test ...

What, "Twenty Flight Rock" by Eddie Cochran? Hey, it's got number in it...

U.O., Pogo:

I'd be doggone ancient if I were a dog. I was born in the year of the dog to a dog and a rat. I'm a prime example of a dog yeared blog beard.

Yes, I did have Chinese food for lunch, why do you ask?

re: Captain Tuttle
first name was Jonathan

Yea, insom, but what about the plot? I have a couple things running around in my head, but I'm Not Quite There yet. I almost remember!

I remember!!! Hawkeye and the guys invent "Capt. Tuttle" in order to donate his salary to an orphanage. He then "dies" by falling from a chopper without a parachute.

Do I get a prize?

A fictional character whose exploits Hawkeye embellished and used to snooker the who Army. Tuttle ended up dead with a medal short of the Medal of Honor.

Where's my sign?

I yield to the lady in the hoop skirt and parasol.

he graduated from the Berlinisches Polytechnikum...

Hawkeye :You should read my file...

Aw, shucks. Thank you, kind sir! ;)

C.W. McCall's Wolf Creek Pass if NEone is actually innerested ...

Uh, just re-reading....I think Ken takes the prize!

My theory goes like this. A go kart and scooter maker had an extra thirty thousand wheels.This is option number twenty seven.
He put wheels on everything,including palm trees,bumper cars,elephants,and children.

Captain Jonathan Tuttle's demise in such a manner is pure Hollywood (and *no* Tuttle ever gets tagged with a cool name like "Jonathan"--we're all Dave or Bob or Bill). Besides, we don't wear parachutes in helicopters--if anything goes wrong in flight, you can't get out of the blasted thing anyway.

And then Mother Theresa's Orphanage wins the SGLI Sweepstakes again...

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