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December 08, 2005


The Alarm Clock From Hell

(Via Gizmodo)

Update: Here's an earlier concept for an alarming alarm clock, also via Gizmodo)


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I don't think I'd "catch it and put it back in it's cage." I think I'd squish it. So I'm thinking that would be a waste of money.

I have the Federlines for this very purpose.

lou~ Do us all a favor and squish 'em.

And say you DON'T kill it. What's an average blowfly's lifespan? Will they send you a new one when the one that came with the clock dies of natural causes? What if you have a window open and it flies away? What if your cat eats it? Seems to me the company will lose millions shipping replacement blowflies. (CAN you ship a blowfly?) Plus, what if it's a really lazy blowfly and just perches somewhere, not buzzing around your head at all--hence not waking you and hence making the whole alarm feature useless? What do you say when your arrive late for work? "My blowfly is lazy?" And would "lazy blowfly" be AGNFARB?
It's fun saying "blowfly," though. Try it!

It would fly around me only once.

And this sick woman is allowed to run around free? Someone needs to catch her and put her back in her cage.

Sorry, Bumble. Didn't see your post.

Bill, I was thinking "Snoozing Blowfly" might BAGNFARB.

They say we swallow a total of 8 bugs in our sleep every year...

And what about these bad gifts

I have one of these. Its called a husband.

OMG ~ I finally was able to link, and I sent the wrong article. DANG!

At least I know I can do it now. Yay!

Just what the hell is a blowfly and what caliber will bring it down?

southerngirl - *snork*

Thanks for the explanation - I was a little confused there...

But a high five for and A+ for "link ability"!

I'm with bumble... I'd end up killing it and going back to sleep.
My roommate's got one of these talking alarm clocks, and it drives me nuts. It doesn't ring- it just says in this weird robotic voice, "Alarm, alarm. It is eight AM. Time to wake up. Alarm, alarm." *shudders*

Do NOT buy this for someone with a ceiling fan.

I wouldn't have to kill it. My cats would.

HooBert, I think your roommate's alarm clock is justification for a mechanical hunting license and a high calibre rifle.

Two words: Target practice.

Where's my 12-gauge?

I think Harry Potter would be friggin awesome at this.....

Do these things work on cranky eight year olds?

Aunt Nancy - I can guarantee a 12-gauge would.

Aunt Nancy- My mom had a puppet named Harry that she used to get us up when we were little. My sisters loved it and jumped cheerfully out of bed when Harry woke them up. I scowled and batted at him and pulled the covers over my head. So if your kids are like me, probably not. :-)

Bumble - Boo-boo is very much like you. I go in, wake her up, and she pulls the covers up but instead of growling, she whines. I'm sure the whine will change to a growl when she hits teenagerhood. I can't wait.

(heavy sarcasm)

If I didn't get up on time, my dad would send our 3 dogs up after me. I usually woke up just as the canine stampede jumped on my bed. Sounds cute, doesn't it? My therapist thought so, too. Twitch, twitch.

Or, to save on postage, you could just move your alarm clock out of reach, so you have to get up to turn it off in the first place.
All through high-school I used my dad as an alarm clock. (He taught at the school I went to, so we drove in together)
Bonus points if you caught the (part of a) movie quote in there.

blowfly, don't bother me...

Key quoteOne thing that sometimes wakes you up at night and prevents you from sleeping is the mosquito or blowfly when flying around your room.

Um..not me. Thank God, seeing as blowflies are usually only found around rotting flesh or feces.

Mr. C - *snork*

I want a CLOCKY! Forget the blowfly! Now, that is an invention that should have been on Dave's Christmas gift list. And it's fur covered...what else could a person ask for?

oo my cats would be crazed. oh noo, i dont think so. but dave, add this to your gift list.
crazed blowfly alarm clock wbagnfarb

I could definitely deal with clocky better than a blowfly.

Jimbo, my first thought too. Hey a ringing snitch!

But why does clocky look like a large feces on wheels?

Look here you freaks! Nobody squishes Blowfly! I invented that rap music that your kids torture you with and I will put a curse on each and every one of you blowfly smack talking guys!

Heepers Jeepers
Devil's Tea
When you wake up tomorrow
there will be a beautiful pussy
where your little two inch dick used to be!

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