SOON TO BE OVERHEARD IN BARS EVERYWHERE

"Excuse me, miss, but it sounds like you have a stuffy nose. Try some of this!"

(Thanks to Chris)

Comments

[SteveB]

Science marches on.....

[U.O]

Nasal S3X!!

Watt'll they think of next?

Oh.

[SteveB]

And one other thing:
a sex hormone that works on both men and women

Not that I'm speaking for all men but in my case, I never needed any stimulation beyond, "Hi. My name is Barbie..."

[Tamara Rhymes With Camera]

Ring it up! Gift-wrap it! I'll take three! No, five! Oh, just gimme everything ya got!

[LadyBug]

The design is very....phallic, is it not?

[Mr. Completely]

Gives a new meaning to the term "nose-job".

Note to self: MUST buy stock in Palatin Technologies, Inc of New Jersey.

[Kathy P.]

Figures that it's from New Jersey. But seriously - how do you get "sensitizing the vaginal tissue" from a NASAL spray?

[Aunt Nancy]

Kathy - I was wondering the same thing.

[kibby F5™]

If it works that effeciently when applied to the nose imagine it's affect when applied directly!

*goes to stand in Tamara's line*

[Tamara Rhymes With Camera]

Gets it into the bloodstream faster, I'm sure.

And it's synthetic sex hormone, so I'm sure the body knows where to send it.

"Ohhhh, Jefffreyyyy! Scratch my nose, lover! OOOH! Now, hand me a tissue! OH! OH! YYEESSS!"

[insomniac]

if it's applied directly, you get an overwhelming sense of engorgement. in the nose.

[kibby F5™]

*everyone joins Tamara's line*

[DJ]

It's a ...... Beautiful day in the neighborhood!

DJ

[Mr. Completely]

Nah, I prefer to turn my woman on the old-fashioned way (scratch, belch). Strip down (except for my socks), do the Dance of the Dangly Bits, do some Bullwinkle and Barney Fife impressions, a bit of the old slap-and-tickle....

Hmm.

*goes to stand in Tamara's line too*

[Ivory Bill Woodpecker]

Did anyone else click the link "Naked Fla. Man Shocked in Genitals by Taser"? Is that a frequent occurrence in Florida? Dave? Judi? Bueller?

"The Dangly Bits" WBAGNFARB, as would "Naked Genital Shock".

[Ferris Bueller]

Speaking. I'm home sick today sir (cough) but (cough, cough) fighting off a nasty (cough!) cold.

[Ferris Bueller]

However, I am slightly aroused by this medicine mom gave me....

[insomniac]

either way, Kleenex wins.

[Brainy Jello]

a sex hormone that works on both men and women

They already had one for them though. It's called "air."

[Brainy Jello]

*them = the men

Ugh.

[Chianca at Large]

Let's not underestimate the aphrodisiacal qualities of simply being decongested.

[Dr. Doug]

"Doctors said women who used the drug PT-141 in test studies felt a tingling or throbbing . . . "

A tingling or throbbing where? Inquiring minds want to know!

[southerngirl]

Mr. C ~ thanks, you bade be spit all over by computer! Uhh, sorry, I'b not feeling too well. Does anybody have any nasal spray?

[Annie Where-but-here]

At least you don't have to take it orally.

[Sarah J]

"But one caveat that we have about that is they should probably look around themselves before they start taking a pill."
Huh? Look around themselves for what?

[slyeyes]

*sniff*

[Annie Where-but-here]

Goodness, Slyeyes - is that a Flonase in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?

[magic8ball]

I agree with Dr. Doug - location of the tingling and/or throbbing seems like a pretty important aspect of the story. I just don't think a tingling, throbbing nose is going to do a lot for me.

[Eleanor]

Best sentence in article: Watch Local 6 News for more on this story. We certainly will.
AND
Best post (so far), IMO: At least you don't have to take it orally.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | 12:30 PM on November 22, 2005

Thanks Annie WBH, now I'm *zipping out* to buy a new monitor!

[Annie Where-but-here]

...and I'm zipping out to buy fresh batteries....key word -'fresh.'

[Mrs. Thepoint]

Just a tip, Mr. C... the Dance of The Dangly Bits DOESN'T work!

[Mr. Completely]

Mrs. ThePoint - It works for me... but I'm aware that others might not be so easily impressed, which is why I'm standing in line.

Ane please don't use the word "tip" in the same sentence as "dangly bits". Conjures up a disturbing visual.

[southerngirl]

Hmmm... I wonder if Mrs. ThePoint knows something about Mr. C that the rest of us don't?

Nevermind.

[Mr. Completely]

Southerngirl: Indeed she does. I guess I should cop to it: Mrs. ThePoint is Mr. Completely's wife.

[Tamara Rhymes With Camera]

Ahhhh!

Hi, Mrs ThePoint/Mrs C! Welcome!

[Annie Where-but-here]

Whew! I am SO glad I also didn't tell Mr. C it doesn't work. Wouldn't want to start something. Not that it DOES work. I mean, in general, not specifically with Mr. C....I don't know....I don't know anything...except that I am now taking my foot orally.

[Mr. Completely]

Annie WBH - *SNORK!!*

[Tamara Rhymes With Camera]

I've never been drunk enough to enjoy a Dangly Bits Dance. And I don't think the nasal spray would help either, unless it came with a tool for whacking the offensively dancing man upside the head. And maybe a blindfold.

Not even Ewan McGregor could woo me with a Dangly Bits Dance.

So why do men do it?

[Mr. Completely]

Tamara RWC - Same reason why a dog likes himself: Because he CAN!!

[Mrs. Thepoint]

LOL Everyone. Thanks for the welcome! I guess the jig is up! Yes, I confess... I am indeed Mr. Completely's wife. So, I DO know first-hand that the Dangly Bits dance doesn't work. It is QUITE disturbing, in fact!

He didn’t, by the way... miss completely, that is.

[Mr. Completely]

Tamara RWC - I meant, LICKS himself...

Mrs. ThePoint - Well, since I stopped doing the dance in front of the windows, the neighbors have stopped moving away...

[southerngirl]

Mr. C and Mrs TP (uh, that doesn't sound right), I kinda figured that, which is why I made the comment.

Ok, so I looked at the address to find out. :)

Welcome Mrs TheP (uh, not much better, huh?)

[Mrs. Thepoint]

That okay, Southerngirl. You can just call me by my first name - Doesanyoneremember Thepoint!

[Mrs. Thepoint]

By the way... since I'm here. Hi, Dave! (Stands on a chair and waves arms wildly!)

[Mrs. Thepoint]

Yeah, yeah, I know... Uh, Dave ain't here, man!

[Novanglus]

Just what IS the hormone? Does it contain also caffeine? Gee, I KNEW it was only a matter of time before the boys got out of buying the drinks. What happens if it gets stuck? What kind of liability insurance does this company carry? Can a girl sue for pregnancy? Can a boy sue if it doesn't work? Does it have a patent? Can you get the bird flu from it, or aids? We have celebrities to think of here.

I also suggest Mr. Dangly Bits Dance shoot a home video and post it...it would certainly be as entertaining as a boy trying to blow up his ass.

[Mr. Completely]

Novanglus - Not a freakin' chance!

[Annie Where-but-here]

Novanglus - I think Mr. C means not a freakin' chance that the dangly bits dance would be as entertaining as the Mr. Houston-we-have-a-problem, but we'll decide for ourselves once his video is posted.

[Mrs. Thepoint]

LOL, Annie! Don't look at ME! I'm not shooting THAT video!

[Annie Where-but-here]

Ok...lemme see if I have something in the archive that will suffice. Maybe a 'short' movie.

[southerngirl]

Oh, Annie, that was WRONG!

I did have more to say, but I think that everyone here would Completely Mrs. ThePoint, anyway. I'm Sirius.

[Jacki]

Welcome Mrs. Thepoint. Glad to see that Mr. Completely does have a court appointed guardian after all.

Tamara - I've got to confess that Ewen McGregor could do pretty much any dance he wanted, with any bits he wanted, and I would stand in awe. In fact, the more bits the better in his case!

[Annie Where-but-here]

I do believe Mr. C has left the building....blushing...and not dancing... :)

[Stupendous Man]

In the case of Ewen MacGregor, it would probably be referred to in the tabloids as Gangly Brit's Dangly Bits On Display! Reeedollaboudit!

And I like the doctor's quote:
"Essentially, you take off the protective cap and place it at the base of your nostril and then they would just activate the device while breathing normally."
What good would the protective cap do at the base of the nose. And how many women are being administered the treatment in his directions? He does say "they."
He must've had group sex in mind when offering his comment.

[U.O]

... um ... sorta aside, but related, sorta ...

With the "dangly bits" concept, and the "stick" someone mentioned ... I'm wonderin' ...

Do the dangly bits resemble a Pinata?

[Annie Where-but-here]

U.O. - let's go to the videotape. Hmm, they appear to resemble the Santa Maria more than the Pinata, but only under full sail.

Speaking of sales, for any bangly ditz considering venturing out on 'black Friday,' save yourself some time and moolah - www.bf2005.com

[Mr. Completely]

Hey, it could be worse, I guess - this product COULD come as a suppository.

"Sweetie, would ya bend over for me for just a sec?"

[U.O]

Tnx 4 clarifying that, Annie ...

OTOH, I just had a worrisome thot ... I'm hopin' that the Homeland Security inpectors at the airport tomorrow don't become suspicious when they look in my shaving kit and see the Flonase ...

... or aroused ...

[Mrs Swooshman]

Honey! I got some stuff today that will COMPLETELY clear up that snoring problem of yours....

Does this mean that "Roofies" will soon be replaced with "Snorties"?

[Annie Where-but-here]

Mr. C - the 'seeing stars' suppositories are on aisle 9, behind the "rocketman" doofus on the other blog.

[Stupendous Man]

I was gonna post a remark about leading a chick around by the nose, but when I called my attorney... and the warden brought him to the phone... he advised me such a remark could be detrimental to my health.

[U.O]

Yeah, Stupe ... I think I just heard the jingle of a sock full of nickels ...

[Tamara Rhymes With Camera]

Gangly Brit's Dangly Bits On Display! Reeedollaboudit!"

Naw, Ewan shows his bits every chance he gets already. ;)

[Susan]

Let's not underestimate the aphrodisiacal qualities of simply being decongested.

Posted by: Chianca at Large | 12:03 PM on November 22, 2005

So very true, CaL...if you've been clogged up long enough...just being able to breathe is wooooonderful.

[JustCurious]

How many women will buy this product to use alone?