CHRISTMAS IS COMING
And we know what we want.
(Many thanks to Cyndi Schoenbrun)
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And we know what we want.
(Many thanks to Cyndi Schoenbrun)
Posted by judi on November 16, 2005 at 03:24 PM in WARNING: DO NOT OPEN AT WORK, OIYDWYMTTY(NY)G | Permalink
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thank you, judi!
Posted by: MOTW | November 16, 2005 at 03:29 PM
You want a sling?
Posted by: reneviht | November 16, 2005 at 03:32 PM
How does that even work?
Posted by: Sarah J | November 16, 2005 at 03:37 PM
Judi v- I'm not sure how you'd be able to wear one of these. I'm guessing you could work something out with two of them...
Posted by: jamester | November 16, 2005 at 03:39 PM
Sarah - who cares how it works - it's art for art's sake. And I must say, Art sure is fine.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | November 16, 2005 at 03:44 PM
I think judi more or less wants what's wearing the sling...
*drools*
Posted by: Susan | November 16, 2005 at 03:45 PM
Notice Judi didn't say Thanks to Cyndi, but Many Thanks. And Judi, Thanks!!!
Annie WBH, I concur.
Posted by: southerngirl | November 16, 2005 at 03:48 PM
i know i've been very good this year!
Posted by: crossgirl | November 16, 2005 at 03:50 PM
How p.o.'d would your man be if you ordered this for him, he opened it and looked at the tag and it said XS?!?!?
Might be a good way to break up with someone though....
just sayin'
Posted by: Eleanor | November 16, 2005 at 04:08 PM
There are some racy photos if you go back to the main site, and choose another category, like "underwear." It brings up the question why wear anything at all?
Posted by: Liz in the city | November 16, 2005 at 04:14 PM
i was gonna aks - uh, what is keeping it up. but never mind.
just axing.
Posted by: queensbee | November 16, 2005 at 04:22 PM
This will go great with my new kilt!
Posted by: jon | November 16, 2005 at 04:42 PM
An interesting statistic on "WARNING: DO NOT OPEN AT WORK" posts on this blog: There have been 49 since March 2004. Here's a rundown on who posted them:
Judi: 48
Dave: 1
Draw your own conclusions.
Posted by: Chianca at Large | November 16, 2005 at 04:44 PM
Chianca - successfully combines solid statistical analysis with the oosik fondling picture - very impressive
Posted by: TCK | November 16, 2005 at 05:03 PM
Can we somehow get a picture of Walter wearing one?
Not that I'm interested in that sort of thing. Really.
Posted by: tropichunt.com guy™ | November 16, 2005 at 05:19 PM
Christmas may be coming, but I can't wait for Sling!
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | November 16, 2005 at 05:27 PM
And how am I supposed to keep wroking aftr seeangg such things!
Posted by: at work | November 16, 2005 at 05:31 PM
From those wonderful folks at 3M who brought you the Post-it Note!
Posted by: pogo | November 16, 2005 at 05:40 PM
I'd be into Art too if he'd come to my house in that.....
Posted by: Kathy P. | November 16, 2005 at 05:48 PM
This more than makes up for all the Twitney posts.
Posted by: Kilmeny | November 16, 2005 at 05:54 PM
Have we frightened away all the guys yet?
Eleanor - just tell him 'xs' stands for Xtreme Sling.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | November 16, 2005 at 06:19 PM
Okay maybe I'm odd but the first thing that popped into my head was, "$49.00! You have to be friggin' kidding!"
Posted by: Jacki | November 16, 2005 at 06:45 PM
Annie Wbh - I like your thinking! :)
OK, how many people even looked at the price? Hands please.
*looks around*
*sees only one hand up*
Yes, Jacki, you are odd but that's why you fit in here! :-)
Posted by: Eleanor | November 16, 2005 at 07:02 PM
I'm not frightened - there's also no way in hell I would wear that thing - ESPECIALLY after everyone's seen Art (or whatever his name is) wearing it. I'm not in bad shape (while, not really bad anyway), but there's no way I can compete with that....
Posted by: TCK | November 16, 2005 at 07:09 PM
TCK - I'm sure you're a better writer than he is, and you get bonus points for er, hanging in on this thread....guess I could have said that better, but I was distractedddddddd..........
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | November 16, 2005 at 07:22 PM
Jacki~ My first thought: "I dunno. I think it's suspicious that they won't show us his face." Either we have issues with prioritizing, or everyone else does. ;-)
Posted by: Bumble | November 16, 2005 at 07:40 PM
Maybe he's Barry Man-enough.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | November 16, 2005 at 07:45 PM
This poor young man is either choking or experiencing some kind of painful neck spasm, and all you people can do is ogle his niblets! For shame!
Posted by: Jillywilly | November 16, 2005 at 07:53 PM
"PAINFUL NECK SPASM" WBAGNFARB. It would also be more enjoyable than 99% of rap, metal, or Barry Manilow songs.
Posted by: Leonardo, Donatello, Michelangelo, and Raphael | November 16, 2005 at 08:02 PM
Maybe I'm just old, but yes, I too noticed the price on that ... thing. Not the first thing I noticed, mind you. I enjoy imagining how he got such an even tan.
Posted by: javajones | November 16, 2005 at 08:53 PM
Can someone explain to me what that is supposed to be??....is it a new concept in underwear?...I do not get it....
Posted by: julietine | November 16, 2005 at 09:11 PM
BE ON THE LOOKOUT!!
They're on the loose and running amok on the blog!!
Posted by: Eleanor | November 16, 2005 at 09:31 PM
The salty mother of a childhood friend used to threaten to "put his ass in a sling" if he did this or that. I never thought much about what that sling would have looked like, but I think this is pretty close. If she'd threatened to put his balls in a sling, he'd never have done anything to piss her off.
Posted by: Lairbo | November 16, 2005 at 10:08 PM
Gotta admit - I also noticed the price.
And, of course, I failed to notice the warning until *after* I'd opened it.
Posted by: BLT | November 16, 2005 at 10:42 PM
OK, I gotta ask - what's the deal with the teenage mutant ninja turtles?
Posted by: TCK | November 16, 2005 at 10:57 PM
although, now that I think about it, they couldn't possibly be teenagers anymore...so what's the deal with the almost middle-aged mutant ninja turtles?
Posted by: TCK | November 16, 2005 at 10:59 PM
anyone? anyone?
Posted by: TCK | November 16, 2005 at 11:00 PM
C'mon, TCK, they're Leonardo, Donatello, etc. Look up higher on the thread. Though I don't know how it's relevant. And, I know why you're still hangin' around. You wanna hang with us gals, to see if anyone takes their top off. And, since you refuse to go topless, we'll never know if you can compete. ;)
Posted by: southerngirl | November 16, 2005 at 11:19 PM
Hey! I'm finally back! For some reason my ISP was not connecting to many web sites, including the blog. I've been suffering from withdrawl. I was THIS CLOSE to going down to the Time-Warner office and shooting someone in the thigh!
So..... Did everyone miss me?
About that... uhm... thing that the guy is almost wearing, I can only say... "OWWWWWWWWWWW!"
Posted by: AlanBoss | November 16, 2005 at 11:26 PM
Hey, Al, welcome back! I can't connect sometimes, and it makes me want to shoot someone, somewhere, anywhere,too!
Posted by: southerngirl | November 16, 2005 at 11:58 PM
A variation on a theme first used in "Northern Exposure": It's not the sling you fling, it's the sling itself.
P.B.
Posted by: PirateBoy | November 17, 2005 at 12:53 AM
hey AlanBoss! .. yep, you were missed. wondered where our "late night left coaster" went.
n yeah re the owww. gives "tighty whities" a new slant huh?
Posted by: just sayin' | November 17, 2005 at 01:29 AM
Wow guys! **sniff**
And I'm no sooner back that I have to go out of town for about a week to a remote location with nothing but dial-up. So I may be absent again.
So if I don't gt in before next Thursday, Happy Thanksgiving to all the bloglits!
Posted by: AlanBoss | November 17, 2005 at 01:42 AM
Charging twice as much for only half a pair of underbritches. Now that's marketing, my friends.
P.S. I don't know Art, but I know what I like.
Posted by: golfwidow | November 17, 2005 at 07:53 AM
King Wingbipeekaboo would like to point out the fact that there have been surprisingly few ramparts-related posts lately. Hint hint wink wink nudge nudge beg beg judi Dave?
Posted by: King Wingbipeekaboo Etc. | November 17, 2005 at 08:00 AM
We think the same mutagens that increased our size and intellects to human proportions must have slowed our aging processes as well, dude. Maybe we're immortal, even! COWABUNGA!!!!
Posted by: Leonardo, Donatello, Michelangelo, and Raphael | November 17, 2005 at 08:26 AM
Besides, even ordinary turtles can live quite a long time, dude.
Posted by: Leonardo, Donatello, Michelangelo, and Raphael | November 17, 2005 at 08:27 AM
Glowing with fluorescence, mutant turtles are neon candles in the dark.
Posted by: Animotion | November 17, 2005 at 08:46 AM
*sigh*
animotion,
do you, by any chance, live near a nuclear power plant?
Posted by: just askin' | November 17, 2005 at 08:58 AM
Wait a minute! It's $49 for the underwear? Never mind then....
Posted by: Somewhere North | November 17, 2005 at 09:20 AM
I can't believe Judi wants half a banana hammock for Christmas.
Posted by: Fort | November 17, 2005 at 09:41 AM
Has anyone checked out the prices at Victoria's Secret lately? You can drop $49 dollars on a thong! (Not DOWN a thong, fellas, but BUYING a thong.)VS usually has a diamond studded bra for sale for the holidays that costs a million or so...and it's DRY CLEAN!
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | November 17, 2005 at 09:57 AM
In case anybody is wondering, I've been trying to blog this morning, but the blog thingie doesn't work. I'm not saying this is because of what judi posted. Not in so many words, anyway.
Posted by: Dave | November 17, 2005 at 10:10 AM
YES!, Annie, I would have bought the Million Dollar Bra but when I saw it was "Dry Clean Only" that was a deal breadker for me! :)
Posted by: Eleanor | November 17, 2005 at 10:12 AM
I just got a "page cannot be displayed" message but when I closed and opened up a new page - voila! - my post was there, or here, depending on your POV! :)
Posted by: Eleanor | November 17, 2005 at 10:14 AM
OH - *light bulb*
Dave means HIS postings, not our comments.
never mind.
Posted by: Eleanor | November 17, 2005 at 10:15 AM
I was wondering if you were awake yet,Dave;)
Posted by: Fort | November 17, 2005 at 10:32 AM
*gasp*
oh i just know the blog is not even close to suggesting that judi's post is worse than his historical rampart entries. ppfftt.
Posted by: just sayin' | November 17, 2005 at 11:02 AM
No, no, no...it can't be what Judi posted...must be your Thanksgiving turkey holding the blog hostage.
Posted by: blog girl #85 | November 17, 2005 at 11:08 AM
Please. For the sake of us all. Let him go.
Posted by: blog girl #85 | November 17, 2005 at 11:09 AM
Well, since Judi broke the blog with her doodle dude and his massive half a banana hammock, I will amuse myself (if no one else) with a true account featuring Aretha Franklin.
A few days ago I had been playing my guitar and had changed the battery in my tuner. Being a dork of incredable proportions,I,for some stupid reason stuck the old 9 volt in my pocket.
Later on that same day, a friend asked me for a ride to the store. As we are toodling along, Aretha starts up on the radio. WHAT YOU WANT- BABY I GOT IT... my friend and I start singing at the top of our voices. This startled many motorists because we had the windows rolled down and our singing sucked.
We are butt dancing and singing like a couple of lunatics,when suddenly I felt something kinda hot. Then it became REALLY HOT! I quit singing and raise up in the seat trying to dig whatever it was out of my pocket. I am swerving, but nobody notices because this is, after all, Miami.
My friends looks over at me and says, "WHAT the hell are you doing?" I reply, "THERE IS SOMETHING IN MY PANTS AND IT'S HOT!" She said, "Whaaaaaaat?"
The few of you that have read this far realize that the 9 volt connected with some of the change in my pocket. My thought was if I don't get this out of my pants it will explode or something. Finally, I dig the white hot battery out of my pants and chuck it out the window.
Moral of the story-Don't sing Aretha songs with a battery in your pants.
Posted by: Fort | November 17, 2005 at 11:13 AM
Good Lord, after seeing senor slingblade, how could you NOT be awake?
or rinsing your brain out with bleach?
I'm with KINGWABBAHNAHBIE! I took it like like man, now unfold the ramparts!
(Unfolded Ramparts WBAGNFARB, no?)
Posted by: MrFishair | November 17, 2005 at 11:16 AM
Fort! Chortle, guaffaw, snort, chuckle, snort, snort, giggle. Thanks!
Posted by: blog girl #85 | November 17, 2005 at 11:33 AM
southerngirl: I KNOW who the teenage mutant ninja turtles are...I used to watch 'em every morning while me an' Wille had breakfast.
what I was askin' is, what are they doing here, running amok and all....
Posted by: TCK | November 17, 2005 at 11:55 AM
Maybe I was too subtle - I just gave the guys an excuse to do 'pricing 'research at Victoria's Secret. Maybe their slings are on too tight to think straight. And yes, Eleanor, for a million bucks, I want machine wash, and a cabana boy to wash it for me.
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | November 17, 2005 at 12:14 PM
TCK ~ apparently I missed the reason they're running amok, also. Psst, maybe Ivory Bill knows!
Posted by: southerngirl | November 17, 2005 at 12:19 PM
I guess my Brain was Annie where butt here, or the bleach hadn't finished drying yet, cuz I'm sure I saw Victoria Secrets at some point.
Ah crap, point just made my mind go back to the sling image.
*scrambles blindly to find more bleach or VS site*
(thanks Annie-wbh ;)
Posted by: MrFishair | November 17, 2005 at 12:30 PM
Fort - good advice, and just in time, too.
Posted by: Mr. Completely | November 17, 2005 at 01:02 PM
MrFishair - just one 't' in my-last-name, please. I'm sure the Victoria's Secret reference got you a little confused, butt it's all behind us now, correct?
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | November 17, 2005 at 11:33 PM
Those are just great - for a laugh, try to picture them on a guy with any body hair or body fat. My favorite has to be the bathing suit with the three cutouts in back. Umm. Right. http://www.vizeau.com/v125.htm
Posted by: LM | November 19, 2005 at 03:03 PM
Some of the folks here seem to be missing the point. The question shouldn't be "How do they stay on?" but "How soon 'til they fall off? ;)
Posted by: kj | November 19, 2005 at 03:13 PM
aaaahhhhhh!!!!
Yellow Warning on that 3:03 pm link!!
dnoaw
dnoahome if children are underfoot!!
Posted by: jus' scandalized! | November 19, 2005 at 06:40 PM
kj - some of them look like they'd snap off, like a rubber band....(hee, hee, I said 'rubber')...
Posted by: Annie Where-but-here | November 20, 2005 at 01:40 AM
Monica’s Tips for present snooping:
1) Wrapping paper that is really light in color can usually be seen through by pressing the paper tight to the box its wrapped around.
2) Certain things have certain shapes. For instance a “Bratz” doll box is a one of a kind shape, and baseball bats or skis are unique shapes too.
3) Feeling with your hands. For instance, a box of candy canes, you can feel the space between each cane’s hook.
4) Sneak a round. Look in places you wouldn’t normally look. Examples, bathroom, mom and dad’s room, even in your room a present might be hidden.
5) Cracks. Sometimes there are cracks in the wrapping paper, or poor folds in the wrapping paper that you can look into and see something.
6) Shake. If you shake a present the sounds it makes could give you a clue. If it sounds like broken glass – you’re in trouble. But it back and leave the room.
7) Weight. If the box is heavy or light can be a clue.
8) Size. If the box is big or small can be a clue. If it as big as a doll house, it might be a doll house.
9) Smell. Your present might have a sweet smell if its candy, a new clothing smell, or some other smell that might give you a clue.
10) Think. Use your brain and think, putting together all these clues.
Written by Monica Noffsinger, 8 Dec 2006, 3rd grade Nokesville Elementary School
Posted by: Monica | December 22, 2006 at 09:56 PM