ATTENTION MOTORISTS
Get out of your car now.
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Get out of your car now.
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I buy my snake a monthly pass for public transit. Keeps him out of my car!
Posted by: otherDave | November 29, 2005 at 11:02 AM
I grew up in southern Florida, and I came face-to-face with a spider the size of Godzilla while driving one evening. He was behind the visor. You can bet I was out of that car faster than a clown escapes his tiny car. (I kid you not, those miserable "house spiders" can be bigger than your widespread hand.) *shiver*
Posted by: neatfreak | November 29, 2005 at 11:03 AM
Dave, ith yoo mouf awite?
Posted by: Nannie | November 29, 2005 at 11:29 AM
Somehow, I never pictured snake wranglers heading out to quarry their prey with a holster of Aqua Net.
Posted by: Jillywilly | November 29, 2005 at 11:31 AM
Did you scroll down to see the other stories? I think "Naked Ear Squat" WBAGNFARB
Posted by: KCSteve | November 29, 2005 at 11:36 AM
Whether or not is WBAGNFARB, what the heck is a 'nude ear squat' anyway?
http://www.mmail.com.my/Current_News/MM/Tuesday/National/20051129102720/Article/index_html
Posted by: Capt. Pike | November 29, 2005 at 11:38 AM
Let me get this straight. A poisonous, death-causing serpent 3 feet long slithers into his car, and the first place he calls is City Hall? And then he calls the police?
Am I the only one who finds this odd?
Posted by: Schadeboy | November 29, 2005 at 11:49 AM
Perhaps the Kuala Lumpur City Hall is where the Serpent Extermination Board is located.
Posted by: Guin | November 29, 2005 at 11:51 AM
hmm. serpent elimination board wbagnfarb, or board of serpent elimination... nah. i've worked for the govt for too long...
Posted by: queensbee | November 29, 2005 at 11:52 AM
"Snake wranglers. Why did it have to be snake wranglers?" Also, "The Snake Wranglers" WBAGNFARB.
LIKE THIS IS TOTALLY TUBULAR FER SURE:
(1) Go to www.80s.com
(2) Click on "Entertainment"
(3) Scroll down & click "Valley URL"
(4) Type in a URL (Dave's, for example), then hit "Enter" on your keyboard, and...
(5) The site is translated into totally awesome Vallingo, fer sure!!!
From the grody swamps of Arkansas, Ivory Bill Woodpecker
Posted by: Ivory Bill Woodpecker | November 29, 2005 at 11:54 AM
Jilly, I would have to bet that the aerosol they used was not Aquanet, but Axe body spray (fav motto: "Farmers have asked to use you as pesticide"). My teenage son brought some home from practice one night and, GAG, suffice to say, it found its way to the bottom of a trashcan pretty quick.
Posted by: MOTW | November 29, 2005 at 12:03 PM
Overheard on the phone:
Hello, City Hall? Got a metRe long cobra listed in the Lost & Found? Nope? Well, I've got one here - just crawled into my car as I was eating breakfast. You'd better put me through to the Fire Department then.
Hello, Fire Department? Yea, got this metRe long cobra in my car ... what? NO, it's not on fire! No, the snakes not on fire either! Oh, you only deal with fires huh? NO. It's not a rental, it's mine. Calling the rental office is out. So? Who could you recommend to me that'll ... oh, the next desk is the Rescue Squad? Ok, I'll try them.
Posted by: kibby F5™ | November 29, 2005 at 12:04 PM
MOTW - Axe not only stinks, but my neighbor tells me it permanently etched the glass in her bathroom mirror (courtesy of her teen son). You're right - it could easily kill a snake.
Posted by: neatfreak | November 29, 2005 at 12:12 PM
Well you’re the real tough cookie with the long history
Of breaking little hearts, like the one in me
That’s o.k., lets see how you do it
Pull down your drawers, lets get down to it!
Do a naked ear squat!
Why don’t you a naked ear squat!
Do a naked ear squat!
Fire away!
I make up bogus charges, I know it ain't fair
But that’s too bad, see if I care!
Squat on down, feel the burn!
Then get ready for another turn!
Do a naked ear squat!
Why don’t you a naked ear squat!
Do a naked ear squat!
Fire away!
Posted by: mudstuffin | November 29, 2005 at 12:14 PM
We'll be contacting you shortly, Mudstuffin.
Posted by: Pat Benatar's Legal Team | November 29, 2005 at 12:21 PM
Like, Ivory Bill, I tried it, and it was you know, like, totally tubular. Especially the, you know, comments section.
Posted by: southerngirl | November 29, 2005 at 12:28 PM
IBW, I'm, like, you know, crying right now. That was just like, so, totally excellent.
Posted by: Mrs Swooshman | November 29, 2005 at 12:52 PM
Two hours to catch a snake? The should have just called in this guy.
Or this guy. It takes one to catch one.
Posted by: Bumble | November 29, 2005 at 03:09 PM
Ooh, Bumble, good connection there!! (See, for those who don't know, Tom Sizemore played Snake in the movie Big Trouble, based on Our Dave's blockbuster novel.)
Posted by: Mr. Completely | November 29, 2005 at 03:21 PM
Is Big Trouble available on DVD?
Posted by: southerngirl | November 29, 2005 at 03:23 PM
Southerngirl - Amazon has it, for $13.99 with free shipping (and used ones from $4.13).
Posted by: Mr. Completely | November 29, 2005 at 03:34 PM
Trust me, if there's a snake ANYWHERE in my vicinity, I will be on TOP of the car before I can call ANYONE!
Posted by: Mrs. Thepoint | November 29, 2005 at 04:29 PM
Mrs. Thepoint~ Is Mr. C the sort of guy who does his manly duty and catches the snakes, kills the spiders, chases the bats out of the house etc? :-)
Posted by: Bumble | November 29, 2005 at 04:35 PM
Snakes. Why does it have to be snakes?
Bumble - You bet I am.
Posted by: Mr. Completely | November 29, 2005 at 05:02 PM
Mr. C- Was I asking you? ;-) Just kidding.
I'll call you next time a bat gets in.
Posted by: Bumble | November 29, 2005 at 08:34 PM
Dave:
Maybe I'm touching a third rail here, but you seem to have a thing for snake stories. So, can you tell me, do you have an issue in the "oosik" department? IYKWITA? NTTAWWTNTTAWTNTTAWWT...
Posted by: Poop Dogg | November 30, 2005 at 06:43 AM
Thanks, Mr. C. I ordered it last night.
Posted by: southerngirl | November 30, 2005 at 09:46 AM