ATTENTION, MEN
Do not click here.
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First?
and damn glad to be female!
Posted by: Angel | November 23, 2005 at 08:55 AM
Whatever you say, Dave ...
Posted by: U.O | November 23, 2005 at 08:55 AM
Tasered genitals-agnfarb?
Posted by: chief cook | November 23, 2005 at 08:56 AM
Posting of a general request ... NEbuddy who lives in SoCal area (or visits there on occasion, as do moi ownself) ... if you wanna partake of the DBBLOG gathering (party?) ... you might wanna email Mr. C or me ... we're trineta take a ... person ... (almost said "head" there) count ...
Posted by: U.O | November 23, 2005 at 08:59 AM
cc -
Tasered? Now I really don't wanna click the link ...
Posted by: U.O | November 23, 2005 at 09:00 AM
[Dang ... hope I did that "Socal email thingy" in a proper manner ...]
Posted by: U.O | November 23, 2005 at 09:02 AM
"...caught breaking windows and asking women to touch him..."
I'd say he got more than he bargained for as far as the touching goes.
Posted by: Bumble | November 23, 2005 at 09:03 AM
Painful, yes, but it seems like this time the punishment really fit the crime.
Posted by: Lairbo | November 23, 2005 at 09:05 AM
Bumble ... whut are you doing up at this hour?
Or are you just getting home?
Posted by: U.O | November 23, 2005 at 09:17 AM
Criminal damage indeed.
Posted by: Reddsuss | November 23, 2005 at 09:24 AM
But one of the gun's prongs accidentally hit Miljour's genitals and got stuck
You told me not to click, Dave, but did I listen...NOOOOOOOO!!!
Now I'm curled up in a fetal position (which is making it very hard to type, let me tell you).
As Mr. Travolta said in Saturday Night Fever:
"Dumb f#*k."
Posted by: Jeff Meyerson | November 23, 2005 at 09:29 AM
cop2: Told you it was loaded!
cop1: I thought you were joking and this would just scare him!!!
cop2: Well, you sure got his attention at point-blank range.
Posted by: kibby F5™ | November 23, 2005 at 09:33 AM
U.O~ *shrugs* I'm normally up at this hour; why should today be any different? Woke up a little before nine; couldn't go back to sleep. We're having our first real snow of the season today; guess someone ordered a white Thanksgiving. Thought I'd get up and make the most of the only day with no demands on my time I'm going to have until Christmas break. Should I spend it scrap-booking, reading, cross-stitching, crocheting, watching TV, or messing around on the blog all day? Or all of the above? Ah, freedom. Oh, wait. I forgot to factor in the Macroeconomics essay and the fifty-ish finite math problems...
Posted by: Bumble | November 23, 2005 at 09:33 AM
Based upon "Sometimes When We Touch" by Dan Hill:
You ask for me to touch this
As I shook out my reply.
I'd rather be arrested, honestly
Than see another cop drive by.
And who are you to judge me
By the pervy things I do?
The taser sting so badly,
It hurts me worse than you....
And sometimes when they shoot
Their aim is just about moot
And I have to close my eyes and hide
I wanna hold me, I could die
My genitals ache, we both know why.
I wanna hold me...
till the pain in me subsides....
Posted by: PirateBoy | November 23, 2005 at 09:34 AM
He probably enjoyed it.
Posted by: Leetie | November 23, 2005 at 09:40 AM
Bumble ... sorry, my bad ... fer sum reason, I'd thot you were posting from the left coast ... specifically, SoCal ... so very sorry for having made that error ... resume math problems ...
Posted by: U.O | November 23, 2005 at 09:50 AM
Accidentally, huh? Did it happen to be a female cop? :-)
Posted by: Renee | November 23, 2005 at 10:01 AM
U.O~ I was born in California, but I don't live there anymore. Wish I did; I could come meet you at your gathering/party. :-) When is it, btw? If it coincides with my trip to Portland over X-mas break, maybe... hmm.
Posted by: Bumble | November 23, 2005 at 10:01 AM
No decision yet ... still in discussion stages ... likely mid January, mebbe ...
Besides which already, you could prolly spend you time @ Powell's more productively ... after all, you don't really expect any sanity or logic to result from such a gathering, does ya?
Posted by: U.O | November 23, 2005 at 10:07 AM
Yeah!, come on, come on, come on, come on
Now touch me, baby
Can’t you see
That I am not afraid?
What was that call that you just made?
Why won't you look beyond the shade?
What was that call that you just made?
Now, I’m gonna love you
Till the tasers spike the pain
I’m gonna love you
Till my orbs
Fall past
My thigh
For you and i
(Ouch - talk about Greatest Hits!)
Posted by: Slightly Irregular | November 23, 2005 at 10:11 AM
UO, I don't know that anyone would go if all they'd get was sanity and logic. What would be the fun in that? :)
Wish I could go. Sounds like a good time.
Posted by: southerngirl | November 23, 2005 at 10:14 AM
Tasered in the nads, huh? Probably still didn't hurt as bad, as long, or leave as lasting a mark as having a lit bottlerocket stuck in your ass, I'm guessing.
Posted by: Mr. Completely | November 23, 2005 at 10:14 AM
aaaggh ~ all these earworms!!
Posted by: southerngirl | November 23, 2005 at 10:15 AM
Not being a man, all I can say is "Tough luck."
Posted by: Guin | November 23, 2005 at 10:21 AM
The naked man deserved it.
And I love how they admit that "officers can't aim" - yet "accidently" got him in the genitals.
Posted by: shuKy | November 23, 2005 at 10:27 AM
I've seen this story already...but it wasn't on Cbol's blog, and it wasn't here, so, for the life of me, I cannot remember where I saw it.
Posted by: Tamara Rhymes With Camera | November 23, 2005 at 10:27 AM
Isn't this a torture... ahem.. unique questioning method being used in Guatanomo? More importantly, does Donald Rumsfield moonlight as a Fort Meyers cop?
Posted by: Somewhere North | November 23, 2005 at 10:37 AM
I'm in socal- Huntington Beach. I'll meet anyone anywhere, unless they're a Florida cop.
Posted by: Dave (not Barry) | November 23, 2005 at 10:37 AM
U.O- Trust me, I'll definitely be spending some quality time in Powell's. Last time I shopped there, I was looking for a copy of Dave Barry Talks Back in the humor section. I found a used copy with an inscription something like this:
Dear John,
I thought you might enjoy this. This guy is really funny.
Mark
Guess Mark didn't think so since he sold it. Mark's probably not the brightest bulb on the string.
And don't worry. I certainly won't be expecting to find sanity and logic if I meet you guys. When have I ever asked those things of you? ;-) Let us know when you decide on a date for this shindig. I need to find out what the exact parameters of my break are and see when I’ll be out west. And find an escort. Not that I don’t trust you all, but you’re mostly men twice my age that I’ve never met. Maybe I can get my brother-in-law to fly down with me and play bodyguard. But I'm betting this thing won't be held till I'm already back in Indiana. Oh, well. I'll have to throw a mid-west bloggits party one of these days. :-)
*end of long ramble*
Posted by: Bumble | November 23, 2005 at 10:53 AM
John, I mean. Not Mark. "Strike that; reverse it."
Posted by: Bumble | November 23, 2005 at 10:54 AM
I was in No Cal about 3 weeks ago, briefly...Mr Swoosh and I DROVE to Vegas from Seattle for a dang softball tournament. 18+ hours. Sunny in vegas, cloudy and rainy in WA and OR, and SNOW in the Siskiyous (sp?). BTW, does anyone live in MY area (Pac NW)? I think Cyn and Aunt Nancy are up here somewhere, not sure though.
Posted by: Mrs Swooshman | November 23, 2005 at 10:56 AM
Aunt Nancy's in Iowa, I believe.
Posted by: Bumble | November 23, 2005 at 10:58 AM
We've some folks from the Seattle area!
Posted by: kibby F5™ | November 23, 2005 at 11:03 AM
Bumble, Willy Wonka right? The original.
Posted by: Sarcasmo | November 23, 2005 at 11:06 AM
Mrs. Swooshman - my brother lives in Kent. He's also a fan of Dave's. Does that help?
Posted by: southerngirl | November 23, 2005 at 11:12 AM
Sarcasmo- Right. :-)
Posted by: Bumble | November 23, 2005 at 11:34 AM
YES!
Posted by: Sarcasmo | November 23, 2005 at 12:44 PM
I remember the exact moment this unfortunate incident occurred, 'cause living 125 miles away from Ft Myers I could still hear the scream.
Posted by: Stupendous Man | November 23, 2005 at 02:27 PM
Who's ever heard of a snozberry??
Posted by: Brainy Jello | November 23, 2005 at 02:47 PM
BJ~ A snozberry is what happens when someone eating cranberries at table laughs so hard that they shoot out their nose onto the turkey. Happy Thanksgiving!
Posted by: Bumble | November 23, 2005 at 03:36 PM
Two things: 1) I think the cops were just obliging him by "touching him in an inappropriate place" and 2)I saw Johnny Jackass do this to himself on purpose.
Also, with all the plans going on, I feel left out. Anybody in the SC area
Posted by: Shredder | November 23, 2005 at 04:54 PM
What's a taser compared to a man trying to pull a truck with his dancing dangly?
Ok...the discussion about torture in our society is obviously ignoring the men right here in the United States. where is our Congress on this?
Posted by: Novanglus | November 23, 2005 at 06:04 PM
Cop 1: "I'm gonna have to Taser this guy."
Cop 2: (whispering) "20 bucks if you get him in the 'nads."
Posted by: Scott | November 23, 2005 at 06:07 PM
All us girls are giggling. Instant karma can be beautiful.
Posted by: jona | November 23, 2005 at 06:47 PM
cyn is in san diego, Bumble. and i bet we could sweet talk seatazz into helping me watch over you. (i do a lot of kidding about potables n such, kiddo. but i'm usually the designated driver) (*sigh*)
n The Tazed Nads wbagnfaPunkrb.
Posted by: jus' sayin' | November 24, 2005 at 04:57 AM
Thanks, cyn. I'll keep that in mind. But classes start back up Jan. 9th, so if this thing happens in the middle of January, I'll be back here toiling in new and ever more horrible classes while you guys are partying. :-) Happy Thanksgiving!
Posted by: Bumble | November 24, 2005 at 08:39 AM
Bumble, et al. --- we'll have photos, promise ... any changes in tentatively vague potential possible maybe dates will be posted ...
Shredder -- did you mean you want to be on the mailing list?
Posted by: U.O | November 24, 2005 at 10:18 PM