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November 23, 2005

ATTENTION, MEN

Do not click here.

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First?

and damn glad to be female!

Whatever you say, Dave ...

Tasered genitals-agnfarb?

Posting of a general request ... NEbuddy who lives in SoCal area (or visits there on occasion, as do moi ownself) ... if you wanna partake of the DBBLOG gathering (party?) ... you might wanna email Mr. C or me ... we're trineta take a ... person ... (almost said "head" there) count ...

cc -

Tasered? Now I really don't wanna click the link ...

[Dang ... hope I did that "Socal email thingy" in a proper manner ...]

"...caught breaking windows and asking women to touch him..."

I'd say he got more than he bargained for as far as the touching goes.

Painful, yes, but it seems like this time the punishment really fit the crime.

Bumble ... whut are you doing up at this hour?

Or are you just getting home?

Criminal damage indeed.

But one of the gun's prongs accidentally hit Miljour's genitals and got stuck

You told me not to click, Dave, but did I listen...NOOOOOOOO!!!

Now I'm curled up in a fetal position (which is making it very hard to type, let me tell you).

As Mr. Travolta said in Saturday Night Fever:
"Dumb f#*k."

cop2: Told you it was loaded!
cop1: I thought you were joking and this would just scare him!!!

cop2: Well, you sure got his attention at point-blank range.

U.O~ *shrugs* I'm normally up at this hour; why should today be any different? Woke up a little before nine; couldn't go back to sleep. We're having our first real snow of the season today; guess someone ordered a white Thanksgiving. Thought I'd get up and make the most of the only day with no demands on my time I'm going to have until Christmas break. Should I spend it scrap-booking, reading, cross-stitching, crocheting, watching TV, or messing around on the blog all day? Or all of the above? Ah, freedom. Oh, wait. I forgot to factor in the Macroeconomics essay and the fifty-ish finite math problems...

Based upon "Sometimes When We Touch" by Dan Hill:

You ask for me to touch this
As I shook out my reply.

I'd rather be arrested, honestly
Than see another cop drive by.

And who are you to judge me
By the pervy things I do?

The taser sting so badly,
It hurts me worse than you....

And sometimes when they shoot
Their aim is just about moot
And I have to close my eyes and hide

I wanna hold me, I could die
My genitals ache, we both know why.

I wanna hold me...
till the pain in me subsides....

He probably enjoyed it.

Bumble ... sorry, my bad ... fer sum reason, I'd thot you were posting from the left coast ... specifically, SoCal ... so very sorry for having made that error ... resume math problems ...

Accidentally, huh? Did it happen to be a female cop? :-)

U.O~ I was born in California, but I don't live there anymore. Wish I did; I could come meet you at your gathering/party. :-) When is it, btw? If it coincides with my trip to Portland over X-mas break, maybe... hmm.

No decision yet ... still in discussion stages ... likely mid January, mebbe ...

Besides which already, you could prolly spend you time @ Powell's more productively ... after all, you don't really expect any sanity or logic to result from such a gathering, does ya?

Yeah!, come on, come on, come on, come on
Now touch me, baby

Can’t you see
That I am not afraid?

What was that call that you just made?
Why won't you look beyond the shade?
What was that call that you just made?
Now, I’m gonna love you
Till the tasers spike the pain
I’m gonna love you
Till my orbs
Fall past
My thigh
For you and i

(Ouch - talk about Greatest Hits!)

UO, I don't know that anyone would go if all they'd get was sanity and logic. What would be the fun in that? :)

Wish I could go. Sounds like a good time.

Tasered in the nads, huh? Probably still didn't hurt as bad, as long, or leave as lasting a mark as having a lit bottlerocket stuck in your ass, I'm guessing.

aaaggh ~ all these earworms!!

Not being a man, all I can say is "Tough luck."

The naked man deserved it.

And I love how they admit that "officers can't aim" - yet "accidently" got him in the genitals.

I've seen this story already...but it wasn't on Cbol's blog, and it wasn't here, so, for the life of me, I cannot remember where I saw it.

Isn't this a torture... ahem.. unique questioning method being used in Guatanomo? More importantly, does Donald Rumsfield moonlight as a Fort Meyers cop?

I'm in socal- Huntington Beach. I'll meet anyone anywhere, unless they're a Florida cop.

U.O- Trust me, I'll definitely be spending some quality time in Powell's. Last time I shopped there, I was looking for a copy of Dave Barry Talks Back in the humor section. I found a used copy with an inscription something like this:

Dear John,

I thought you might enjoy this. This guy is really funny.

Mark

Guess Mark didn't think so since he sold it. Mark's probably not the brightest bulb on the string.

And don't worry. I certainly won't be expecting to find sanity and logic if I meet you guys. When have I ever asked those things of you? ;-) Let us know when you decide on a date for this shindig. I need to find out what the exact parameters of my break are and see when I’ll be out west. And find an escort. Not that I don’t trust you all, but you’re mostly men twice my age that I’ve never met. Maybe I can get my brother-in-law to fly down with me and play bodyguard. But I'm betting this thing won't be held till I'm already back in Indiana. Oh, well. I'll have to throw a mid-west bloggits party one of these days. :-)

*end of long ramble*

John, I mean. Not Mark. "Strike that; reverse it."

I was in No Cal about 3 weeks ago, briefly...Mr Swoosh and I DROVE to Vegas from Seattle for a dang softball tournament. 18+ hours. Sunny in vegas, cloudy and rainy in WA and OR, and SNOW in the Siskiyous (sp?). BTW, does anyone live in MY area (Pac NW)? I think Cyn and Aunt Nancy are up here somewhere, not sure though.

Aunt Nancy's in Iowa, I believe.

We've some folks from the Seattle area!

Bumble, Willy Wonka right? The original.

Mrs. Swooshman - my brother lives in Kent. He's also a fan of Dave's. Does that help?

Sarcasmo- Right. :-)

YES!

I remember the exact moment this unfortunate incident occurred, 'cause living 125 miles away from Ft Myers I could still hear the scream.

Who's ever heard of a snozberry??

BJ~ A snozberry is what happens when someone eating cranberries at table laughs so hard that they shoot out their nose onto the turkey. Happy Thanksgiving!

Two things: 1) I think the cops were just obliging him by "touching him in an inappropriate place" and 2)I saw Johnny Jackass do this to himself on purpose.
Also, with all the plans going on, I feel left out. Anybody in the SC area

What's a taser compared to a man trying to pull a truck with his dancing dangly?

Ok...the discussion about torture in our society is obviously ignoring the men right here in the United States. where is our Congress on this?

Cop 1: "I'm gonna have to Taser this guy."

Cop 2: (whispering) "20 bucks if you get him in the 'nads."

All us girls are giggling. Instant karma can be beautiful.

cyn is in san diego, Bumble. and i bet we could sweet talk seatazz into helping me watch over you. (i do a lot of kidding about potables n such, kiddo. but i'm usually the designated driver) (*sigh*)


n The Tazed Nads wbagnfaPunkrb.

Thanks, cyn. I'll keep that in mind. But classes start back up Jan. 9th, so if this thing happens in the middle of January, I'll be back here toiling in new and ever more horrible classes while you guys are partying. :-) Happy Thanksgiving!

Bumble, et al. --- we'll have photos, promise ... any changes in tentatively vague potential possible maybe dates will be posted ...

Shredder -- did you mean you want to be on the mailing list?

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